1. When we get whistled at in the street, we feel uncomfortable and we’ll always tut and roll our eyes. But we’re awesomely flattered and we’d be gutted if it stopped.
I try not to roll my eyes but yes this is mostly true.
2. We will never grow out of our fascination with pop stars. A guy can be completely ordinary-looking, but we will fancy him if he’s in a band.
3. We are more likely to fancy a guy if his ex-girlfriends are really pretty.
uh. no. quite the contrary.
4. We can be put off a guy by finding out that his ex-girlfriends are a bit ugly.
5. When we look through your Facebook photos, we’re looking to see how pretty or ugly your ex-girlfriends are.
6. We look through your Facebook photos a lot, and we really hope that you haven’t downloaded anything that reveals who looks at them the most.
7. Here’s how to make us fall for you. One day, come on to us so strong that we’re a bit weirded out by it. Then totally fail to ring us. We’ll wonder what we did wrong, and we won’t be able to stop thinking about you.
No. straight from the retarded chicks book.
8. The above strategy isn’t foolproof. We may just lose interest. It depends on how much we liked you in the first place.
9. We often don’t know how much we liked you in the first place. We may have to wait until you don’t phone us. If we’re disappointed, it proves that we fancy you. If we’re not, it proves that we don’t. It’s like when you toss a coin to help you make a decision.
10. Stop trying to understand how our minds work. Even we don’t understand how our minds work.
sounds like a guy wrote this.
11. We constantly change our minds and reserve the right to do so.
this is true. but also true of men.
12. We love getting a missed call from you. It makes us feel in control.
very true. but also true of men.
13. The pleasure of noticing a missed call doesn’t last long. We never know how soon to ring back, and it does our heads in.
sad, but true.
14. We are constantly scared of putting you off by seeming too keen.
15. We are constantly scared of putting you off by not seeming keen enough.
16. We will never discuss this with you because we are constantly scared of putting you off by bringing “us” up in conversation.
17. “I’m scared of being hurt” means “I don’t fancy you as much as I thought I did.” You know it, we know it, and that is all that will be said on the matter.
not true. when I say that, it usually means "i like you more than I thought I did, but i don't want to admit it, and this is a safe way of me testing the waters to see if you feel the same and if you don't i can just walk away without looking too stupid"
18. We say “we’re not manipulative” because we’re really good at being manipulative.
19. We only manipulate your feelings because you manipulated our feelings first.
works both ways
20. Snoring costs you sex.
No. we all snore. get over it.
21. Your feet disgust us.
I must admit, many men's feet do. ok. most men's feet do. ok. they do.
22. We shave our toes.
23. We’ve got a rogue hair that needs regular plucking.
many rogue hairs. doesn't make me any less pretty . at least i pluck them!
24. We went through a phase of shaving our moustache.
I don't know about a "phase" maybe did it once or twice our of curiosity, then stopped our of fear for making it thicker.
25. We leave our legs unshaven on a first date so that we won’t end up in bed with you.
true story. i've done it. esp with other areas too.
26. We wear big knickers on a first date so that we won’t end up in bed with you.
done it too. not on first dates necessarily though. just on days i don't want to have sex for any reason or other.
27. We spend entire first dates fancying the pants off you and worrying that we’ll end up in bed with you, all unshaven legs and big knickers.
28. We don’t actually care that much about the loo seat.
29. We suspect that you like our bodies more when we’re carrying a few extra pounds, but we always feel better about ourselves when we lose weight. However we hate that our boobs look deflated, and we’re disgusted by the injustice of it.
30. We envy you for being able to eat more than us and not get fat. By “envy” we mean “occasionally hate.”
as long ad they admit our metabolisms are slower, no need to hate. if they think we lose weight at the same rate, good reason to hate
31. If a grown-up woman has light blonde hair, she’s bleaching it*. You can tell that a woman is a natural blonde from her mousey eyebrows. (* OK, or she’s Scandinavian.)
32. We trim our nose-hair.
never needed to do that, even though i'm hairy everywhere else
33. Yes we’ve got nice eyes, blah blah. Boring. We are desperate for you to compliment our skin and our necks.
34. We are even more desperate for you to write poems about us.
35. When we’re at a party we clock the sexy girls far quicker than we clock the sexy guys.
36. We find female strippers sexier than male strippers. But that doesn’t mean we want to snog any of them.
none of the above.
37. However we do wish we were gay sometimes, if only to get oral sex from someone who really knows what they’re doing.
38. Size does matter, fellas.
if matter means, "as long as i feel it inside of me and it gets me off", then yes size does matater, but it really doesn't matter THAT much.
39. What you do with it matters even more.
40. What you do with your tongue matters most of all.
Not really. The most important part of sex is the connection between our sex organs and our bodies moving together. everything else is a secondary pleasure. so . no. That's a selfish comment.
41. We’re really scared that you’ll feel our back zits.
42. During breakouts we get up at 6am and cover our spots with concealer while you’re sleeping.
maybe i've done it once.
43. We don’t want you to stay for breakfast. We want you to leave immediately so that you don’t have time to register how dog-rough we look in the morning.
i don't look THAT rough in the morning
44. We want you to text us from your journey home to say how you can’t stop smiling.
yes we do
45. If you don’t text or call within 24 hours we’ll feel so unhappy that no amount of chocolate and wine can cheer us up. Though we’ll give it a try.
yes we are sensitive creatures and we love food!
46. We’d happily sleep with your best mate to make you jealous.
Nay on that one. not if we care about you. and if you're a garbage pail, the best revenge is being the great woman he dropped and regrets dropping. and that means acting like a lady.
47. We’re scared of commitment too.
ill admit, sometimes we are. but we get over the feeling. quickly.
48. If you’re not very well endowed, your girlfriend won’t tell her friends. She’s as embarrassed about it as you are. However if you dump her, she’ll tell everyone.
actually i do tell perhaps one or two people. really close to me that ive known my entire life. for advice. but yes. when we break up, esp if you were mean. we tell EVERYONE but turns into a boy cried wolf thing. every girl does it. gets old.
49. We fake orgasms so that you’ll stop and let us go to sleep.
50. We aren’t always sure when we’re faking it. In orgasms, the line between fact and fiction can be very thin.
true! i sometimes dont even know if i am having an orgasm and i am or i think im having one and im not. true story! Focus woman focus! lol its because our emotions often get too involved. diff between men and women
51. We love falling asleep in your arms, for the first few weeks of a relationship anyway. To be honest we’d sleep a lot better if you weren’t there.
im surprised by this. i thought i was the only one . im not a cuddler at all. never have been. but my recent bf is the only man ive ever liked cuddling with. but even with him, i do like my space sometimes. however i do sleep better with company. not necessarily tangled up, but at least with a body next to me.
52. We find your dark-coloured bedsheets a total turn-off.
yes! they seem unsanitary! i dunno why!
53. We’re all little girls inside. You make us cry far more easily than you realise.