Need some advice on what to say to this girl
Sorry in advance for the long post.
So first some background info.
I’m in college. A bunch of students were going to this room where a person was giving a presentation. The room was packed; there were probably like 60 people in it, including teachers. We were required to go the presentation because we were biology majors and we had to sign our name on a sheet of paper when we walked in to show that we were there (the piece of paper was on the right side of the room, and everyone entered on the right side of the room because that’s where the doors were).
When the presentation started, the whole room was packed, except for a few seats in the back. There was an empty seat next to me and an empty seat to the front left of me. I was sitting in the very back row (the last row). 5 minutes after the presentation started, this girl came in late and she signed in but instead of taking a seat right away she waited for a while and I looked over at her (I was very far away, like 20 to 25 feet away) and she was making eye contact with me. She didn’t look away right away either when we made eye contact. I’m pretty sure that I was the one who broke eye contact first. I turned away and then she walked over and sat next to me (the fact that she sat next to me doesn’t really mean anything because it was one of the only seats available).
I’m guessing it doesn’t matter too much, but does this girl think that I like her (I do think she’s attractive, but I just want to know if she knows that now)? Based on what she did, is this a sign that she likes me or is it too ambiguous?
There’s actually a presentation that a bunch of students are going to this coming Monday, and she might be there. So if she does something like sit next to me, and she actually likes me (and she thinks that I like her), I’ll look like a complete idiot if I pretend like I don’t understand what she’s doing (I think you’d agree). So if she sits next to me and I’m not sitting next to any friends (which might make her not want to sit next to me possibly; I’m not sure), I’m probably going to start a conversation with her and be subtle.
So I was wondering if I could get people’s opinions on what I’m planning to say.
Every year, starting fall quarter, we will all have to go to these things called WIPS (works in progress seminars), which are basically presentations with students at the school presenting the research that they are doing. I already know, based on a biology program handbook they emailed us (which is really long but I don’t even know if anyone reads it), that each year, we have to go to 70% of WIPS presentations and 50% of presentations given by professors (called excellence in biology lectures). We’re all in graduate school to get a Ph.D. in different biology fields.
If I start a conversation with her during a WIPS presentation (or the presentation this coming monday), if, let’s say, she sits next to me, very soon after she sits next to me, I was thinking of going with something like this:
“hey, do you know how many WIPS presentations we can skip?” [I already know the answer to this, but it’s a subtle opener]
“what about the excellence in biology lectures?”
“what year are you?”
“do you have trouble understanding the WIPS presentations, because I’m about to be a second year and I don’t get most of the stuff they’re talking about, so it’s really hard to pay attention” [a lot of people in graduate school have lots of trouble understanding research presentations for the first couple of years]
“when did you start to understand the presentations a lot better, because even after I took the advanced biology courses I didn’t understand the WIPS presentations?”
“so whose lab do you work in?” [in the biology program, we all work in research labs]
“I work in [professor’s name] lab”
“what’s your research project on?”
“mine is on etc.”
“I’m [my name], by the way”
“nice to meet you [her name]”
-and then I’m not really sure what else to talk about, maybe the conversation will head in another direction or maybe the presentation will begin. Maybe I’ll ask her about where she’s from, where she went to for her undergraduate studies, what she majored in, etc.?
So does that sound good? Any criticisms, or things to add or take out? Was that a good time to ask for her name (if I ask too soon, I think it would be awkward and it would make it seem like I’m flirting with her)? Since a lot of people are around, I don’t want to blatantly flirt with her and instead I first want to establish some rapport with her up to a point where we can see each other in the hallway and say hi to each other or nod to each other or wave to each other. Also to a point where I can sit next to her again at the next presentation or she will want to sit next to me. I think she might be able to tell that I like her, right? And yeah, I know it’s boring, plain conversation. But after that (or rather, the next time I see her), I can insert some jokes and flirting or whatever. But my point is that it will be way too awkward to blatantly flirt with her the first time I talk to her with so many people around (including professors which will be able to hear our conversation). It’ll be awkward for her too. I want to be as subtle as possible initially to make things more comfortable.
(This post was last modified: 06-11-2011 06:45 PM by h5757.)