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Share Of American Adults Having NO Sex Reaches All-Time High
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Delta Offline
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RE: Share Of American Adults Having NO Sex Reaches All-Time High
(04-07-2019 01:43 PM)Aurini Wrote:  I've been thinking about writing the following for some weeks now, but I've been having trouble with phrasing things in a way that doesn't sound whiny. But these numbers fit with what I've been experiencing, which is the following: looks-wise, I've got nothing to complain about with the women I've been seeing. No substantial deviation from the past. But emotionally speaking, I'm blown away by the callousness and outright cruelty that's present in them. Dating used to be fun - these days it's like an extended psychological struggle, and I'm thinking of going back to celibacy because the companionship is 0, and the sex is just not worth it.

[...]

I see a lot of suggestive evidence that the some of men who succeed in this environment are not Alpha in the sort of way that we'd describe - a lot of them are out of shape, their sexual equipment is questionable, and they're not particularly wealthy. So what is their advantage?

Low emotional affect. Which is to say, borderline psychopathy.

The entitlement-complex infesting most women has effectively turned them into psychopaths; they're not psychopaths clinically speaking, but because the culture has taught them that men don't have souls, they treat men with utter callousness. So, the only sort of men who can tolerate their company for an extended period of time are those who similarly lack affect. Those who are after one thing, and are willing to lie and manipulate to get it.

We have a coarsened culture, with coarse women, and a coarse dating scene. Those who will dropping out from this aren't necessarily the chumps - they're the men who have souls.

I hadn't been able to articulate it, but I've been having these exact feelings.

It boggles my mind how callously women treat men nowadays. I can't imagine behaving like they do, because I'd hate myself if I did. Here's a confession that makes me an outlier on the forum: Only once in my life have I fucked a girl I wasn't really into and then rejected her after. It actually felt awful. When she texted to hang out again, I wrote a long note trying to soften the blow, thanking her for everything and wishing her all the best. Even to this day, years later, I still occasionally think about what that must've done to her self-esteem and feel a little ashamed.

Contrast that with how girls treat me and other men: They expect us to take all of the social risk to create something, a task you could probably get them to admit is too difficult for them to even attempt, and mercilessly belittle those men who are a bit awkward at it. They have no qualms about letting you buy them shit even when they're totally uninterested in you. Even if it's just a drink or two, it's still unbelievably rude... something a decent person would maybe do to a salesman using company funds, certainly not an individual trying to form a personal relationship. They have no qualms about backing out on plans on a whim (i.e. "flaking"), sometimes without even letting you know, which of course wastes your time and fucks up your calendar, but do they give a shit? They have no qualms about just starting to ignore you out of the blue (i.e. "ghosting"), even when you've spent a lot of time and effort (and sometimes money) trying to court them, and even when it's clear you're developing feelings and this behavior will cause significant psychological torment.

Aurini, your comment about dating feeling "like an extended psychological struggle" hits the nail on the head for me. The pressure I put on myself to be as close to perfect as humanly possible, as the girl sits back and evaluates me while hardly even worrying about the impression she's leaving on me... the countless hundreds or maybe thousands of wasted hours; think what else I could've done with them... the torturous feeling, in the rare event that I come across a girl I really like, of waiting for a text reply and wondering 'is this it?' Is this the one she ignores that ends it dead in its tracks and sends me back to square one? It actually makes me physically queasy. I'm finding now that my primary motivation for gaming isn't the wonderful feeling of sex or companionship or anything, it's the thought that if I find a good one and stick with her, I won't have to deal with this shit anymore. I'll be free.

And this is with me being the type of guy most people think doesn't struggle. By any objective measure, most of the girls who treat me like I have zero worth are ones who should, in a symmetrical dating market, see me as an impossibly good catch.

I hate how whiny this all sounds, but when you've legitimately put in the work and still aren't getting the return, then it's totally fair to stop looking in the mirror and start looking outward.

I reiterate my previous post in this thread: There are some thought germs out there that are absolutely poisoning women's attitudes toward men.
(This post was last modified: 04-18-2019 08:47 PM by Delta.)
04-18-2019 08:34 PM
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RE: Share Of American Adults Having NO Sex Reaches All-Time High - Delta - 04-18-2019 08:34 PM

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