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NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
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calidude Offline
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Post: #751
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I made it 30 days without fapping about two weeks ago but I gave in, so today is officially day one.
03-10-2014 02:53 PM
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heavy Offline
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Post: #752
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
(03-10-2014 02:53 PM)calidude Wrote:  I made it 30 days without fapping about two weeks ago but I gave in, so today is officially day one.

Seems like a defeatist way of looking at it. I've never been a true smoker, but over the last year or two I've smoked more and more so deciding to quit or slow down.

And for me, if I go two weeks without smoking then have a couple smokes when I'm out drinking with friends, I don't look at the next day as day 1...I look at it like over the last two weeks I've smoked one day. Still pretty damn good.

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
(This post was last modified: 03-10-2014 03:22 PM by heavy.)
03-10-2014 03:21 PM
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redbeard Offline
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Post: #753
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I think the biggest problem with fighting masturbation/porn is that it is a built in habit. I strongly suggest that everyone read "The Power of Habit," it's a great book that will give you complete insight into why you keep jerking it day in and day out.

As for me, I've toned it down to about once every two weeks. Lately, however, the chaser effect has been killing me. I get in a routine of having sex, and then on nights that I don't, my body just takes over and any energy I would use with women/sex gets put into convincing myself to fap. It's terrible. Anybody have experience beating the chaser? I fapped twice last night and feel so unenthusiastic today. Good luck boys.

"Every saint has a past, every sinner a future."
03-12-2014 10:19 AM
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deathtofatties Offline
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Post: #754
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I'd like to have a no fap accountability partner. Someone that can check in with me over email and vice versa to make sure that neither person fapped. That would be cool.

Send me a private message if you want to have an accountability partner. It works from what I here. Everyone from the noFap forums does it. Bros remind bros to not fap.

(This post was last modified: 03-14-2014 01:52 AM by deathtofatties.)
03-14-2014 01:48 AM
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JayD Offline
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Post: #755
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
"Hey bro I fapped today just wanted to let you know, aight peace"

I'll be up for the accountability partner.
03-14-2014 03:51 AM
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ColSpanker Offline
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Post: #756
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Had the strangest thing happen. After a bout with a 24-hour flu bug, my desire to frap just disappeared. I'm on No frap day 3 and am doing just fine. Can't quite figure out why this has happened. Change in habit? Change in body chemistry? Usually by day 2 I'm horny enough to fuck a Volkswagen. This is a new development.

"We must all hang together, or assuredly we shall all hang separately."
03-15-2014 02:43 PM
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Jaydublin Offline
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Post: #757
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
(03-15-2014 02:43 PM)ColSpanker Wrote:  Had the strangest thing happen. After a bout with a 24-hour flu bug, my desire to frap just disappeared. I'm on No frap day 3 and am doing just fine. Can't quite figure out why this has happened. Change in habit? Change in body chemistry? Usually by day 2 I'm horny enough to fuck a Volkswagen. This is a new development.


I have had this happen a few times that I can remember. Usually when I have some odd life experience. It will probably come back but use the given streak to help motivate you.
03-15-2014 08:24 PM
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anonymous123 Offline
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Post: #758
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Alright, fuck it, count me in.

Day 0/1.

I'm jumping on the wagon purely because these chicas keep popping up and milking me dry. I'm officially conceding defeat on ability to jack off to favorite porn whenever I want and also service the pussy that jumps out of the bushes.
03-17-2014 02:02 AM
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blueshark747 Offline
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Post: #759
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
(03-09-2014 10:14 PM)killongy Wrote:  I went about 4 1/2 months my longest and I cant say I like the feeling of being on the brink of control... I dont know if any have experienced this but this is my experience.

As time went on from where I stopped fapping , the urges just grew into this sort of possession/trance where all I could think of was to viciously inseminate as many women as possible and spread my seed.

It sounds primal but thats how raw the urges felt , I had a feeling of being completely depraved and could hear my heart beat in my ears when ever I saw an attractive woman and if they had a sizeable rack with soft looking skin my mouth would literally water as if I was about to have a delicious meal.

The feeling of muscle spasms throughout my body when holding back my urge to bend over any women i was talking to and fk them right there not giving a fk who is watching.... At one point when I had gone a month without having sex +no fap ,I came in a couple of seconds by touch alone and my spunk was clearly different than before it seemed more bright , thick and full of life rather than grey looking and sort of pale.
..
I decided that fapping is a necessary evil for me because I cant control the intense heightening of the the sexual urge resulting from not fapping..Its just too intense so much so that I cant even function without sleeping with a woman atleast 2 times a day while on NoFap.

Why do you think there are so many men in trouble now?
With child support and a couple baby mommas.
They never had any self control or discipline letting women determine thier future. They were perfect candidates for the trap.

Not releasing can make you desperate for sex and being desperate can lead to you not being in control of situations and doing wreckless and beta things.
(This post was last modified: 03-17-2014 08:35 AM by blueshark747.)
03-17-2014 08:22 AM
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deathtofatties Offline
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Post: #760
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Day 1.

03-17-2014 04:52 PM
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HankRearden Offline
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Post: #761
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I received some PMs from members asking me about my NoFap experience. As such, I have decided to write a longer post here about how porn affected me, and how quitting it has changed my life. You might call it a 'Quitting Porn Data Sheet' if that feels more familiar. If anyone needs an accountability partner, or wants to speak to me more privately about their problems I encourage you to PM me. As of this current cycle of quitting I am 9 weeks free from porn. My longest previous record was 129 days.

My story is probably an uncommon one: I am 21 years old and, when I decided to quit for real, I was probably at around 20-25 notches. (Since I've intentionally decided to stop counting, a story for another day). But was it really 'sex' with these girls? For 50% of the experiences I could barely get it up at all, for another 30% I probably hit mid-range capacity at best, and I had only ejaculated twice (once in a car and once in a bathroom on New Years). I never had a serious girlfriend. To fix this, I saw doctors in two separate countries and I learned nothing useful at all.

When I was younger I used to masturbate on my stomach against the bed, which probably crushed my nerve endings. I started this at a pretty young age. To this day I seriously struggle to masturbate 'normally' and would have to do it through my boxers in this weird circular motion. I have never met anyone else who does it the same way; it's clearly bizarre. I used to watch copious amounts of porn: 10 tabs going at once, for a better half of a decade. I have no doubt that this was my biggest problem.

One day I realized that the porn I was watching became more and more extreme. Remember when you were 11 and the mere sight of a girl on a poster in a bikini would excite you? How far I had fallen from that utopia! While the porn wasn't overly extreme, I noticed that my tastes began to escalate. I spoke about this to a close friend of mine, who confided in me that his doctor diagnosed him with HOCD (Trust me guys, google this. it alone should scare you into stopping), and that he had tested out shemale porn a few times which confused him because he thought he wasn't gay. I pause here to pose a to you all: do you think anyone is born attracted to shemale rape porn? Nevertheless, the existence of disgusting types of porn suggest that there is indeed a market for it. There are men out there who are so weak, and whose brains have been so destroyed by porn - think about the effect of two hours a day for decades - that they have no way out. They live in a dark, sick, abyss.

Hearing about his fucked up porn taste scared the living fuck out of me. I used to have a really high voice when I was younger, acted in plays and musicals, and because I was relatively fashion-aware I would be asked by girls probably once a year if I was gay. Could I be gay? I can tell if another guy is good looking. Does that make me gay? Does me not being able to finish with girls mean that I have latent homosexuality? Thankfully, because my friend went through this ordeal first I was able to put this all behind me.

After consulting some other sights I and getting my head together I once quit for 129 days. By the end, things were amazing. I felt like I had more concentration, I felt sharper, and most of all I noticed that I was MUCH better with women. I had more confidence with approaches, took rejection better, and just generally felt better about myself. I wonder if the extra testoterone might have helped with that.

The initial flatline was pretty intimidating as I had nothing going on down there for at least 2 months, but afterwards my erections were like tree trunks - that is to say they were fucking awesome.

I went to South East Asia and didn't jerk off for 7 weeks. I was on fire there with girls. I fucked a Thai girl in an alleyway on my second night in Asia.

I'm currently in Mexico, and again, have noticed that I care WAY more about getting with women than I normally do. I smile and flirt with girls during the day much more now, and on nights out I feel more animalistic.

But above all, I have some great news to share with my fellow RVFers:
I finished again from sex in Mexico City, and finished from my first blowjob ever (while shitfaced) in Cancun. I actually think I might be cured!!


Still, I need to be careful. I finished from sex back home recently but the sex was the kinkiest I've ever had and I feel that, as much as I enjoyed the hell out of it, it's going to bring me down a path that can lead back to porn. Either way, my goal is to live a life porn-free.

Below I will give you some reasons to quit porn, and then some steps on how to do it.

Why to Quit

1) a) Crushes the male libido. Do some Googling on this to see how serious it really is. 'Delayed Ejaculation' (the condition I suffered from) rates are soaring at an astronomical rate.

1) b) On the flipside, not masturbating can maintain your high libido and actually improve your game. It keeps testoterone high and your desires for women strong. You'll want sex more, and odds are you'll have more sex as a result.

2) Desensitizes you to traditional sex and morphs your sexual tastes.

3) It's a massive waste of time, for an ultimately meaningless orgasm.

4) It's been proven to be addictive. The longer you keep watching the longer it will take to stop. If you don't think you're addicted try to go three weeks without it. Tons of guys can't even go a full week...how sad is that?

5) If you're so inclined to have a girlfriend or get married one day, you don't want to be that 45 year old guy sneaking off to watch porn twice a week. It's pathetic. I mean, just imagine what it would look like if someone watched your masturbating: crouched over your computer, eyes red from staring, furiously slamming your dick into your hand... does it not seem a little juvenile?

6) For guys new to sex I think it really twists the idea of what sex is meant to be. Most young girls will be totally unaccustomed your concept of sex, and this can actually hurt your chances of having sex or continuing to have sex with a girl. For example, when I lost my virginity I spanked the girl's ass during it, assuming that it was standard procedure. She stopped and went "what was that for"? Absolutely crushing moment (although admittedly very funny in hindsight).

7) From a simple standpoint, most porn provides a third person view of porn and your hand provides a different stimulation than a vagina does. I kind of compare it to training for a tennis match by playing squash.

8) I have even pulled girls by telling them I don't watch porn. They're usually impressed to hear it (if they believe it) and it makes me stand out a bit, and seem less sex-oriented. If only they knew, if only they knew.

9) Tons of women in the industry are abused, and end up with serious drug addictions or committing suicide. One forum member once told me I was essentially a pussy for bringing this up, but I think his comment was unjustified. Just because you like to game women doesn't mean you have to assist an industry which ultimately ruins the lives of many women. I put this last because not all of you will be convinced by this. Fair enough, quit porn for YOU then!

Steps for Quitting:

1) It will never work unless you're serious about it - that is, you need to rationally convince yourself and explain to yourself WHY you are quitting. What is driving you to quit? What will this change in your life?

2) Find a trigger switch. Everytime you're about to open up a porn link do something immediately, almost without thinking, which is different. Do 20 pushups, walk up and down the stairs, put your ipod on for a bit. The key is that you get far away from your computer.

3) Download programs that help with this. There are programs which can block porn and I use one of them called K9 Blocker at home.

4) Believe it or not, I stumbled upon an amazing resource while looking for a way to get around the K9 Porn Blocker in a moment of weakness. Talk about a coincidence! You all NEED to join yourbrainrebalanced.com and create a blog about your path to quitting porn. However, before you do so, read some of the tragic stories of older members on the forum. Read about men whose wives have left them over porn, of 35 year old virgins, of broken men out that that are finally trying to quit. Do you want to end up like them? For me, this was the most important step. It finally showed me that there is a world of men out there who shared my problem, and that they were willing to do something about it. Honestly, I have so much praise for that forum.

5) Get an accountability partner. I personally didn't do this but it seems like a good plan.

6) Talk to your friends about this. I have gotten tons of friends to quit porn, which in turn puts pressure on me to keep it up. I owe it to myself and I owe it to them now.

7) This one is important as well. Just because you start a porn clip doesn't mean that you have lost! There is always a moment to quit the screen and walk out. For me, I would remind myself how feeble and debilitating the eventual orgasm would be, and the self-loathing I would experience after each time. You need to remind yourself why you are quitting, and how you aren't missing out on anything. That's the truth folks.

8) I'm about to say something controversial, and I apologize to moderators in advance if they don't like this. Please don't ban me. The truth is, you might need to spend some time away from this forum. One of the first things the experts say is that you need to reduce the amount of porn triggers you come across (i.e. things that give you the urge to masturbate). For many, reading stories about fucking on RVF, about gaming women hard, etc will be a trigger to masturbate as quite obviously one will get excited. In the same light I would recommend against watching movies with gratuitous sex scenes, against going to strip clubs, etc as well. This stuff is fairly obvious. Alternatively, maybe just stay away from Notches threads or Trip Reports and keep to more PG areas of the forum for a few weeks to see if you can get your feet off the ground - a small sacrifice to make for a big gain.

Finally, I should say that I'm far from perfect. Often at nights I find myself playing around with my dick in bed, perhaps edging at 20% to help me fall asleep. This is not ideal, and I should cut it out. That being said, I really feel like I'm on the right path now.

I have never met anyone who quit porn and found it to be anything other than worthwhile.

Good luck, gentleman!
03-17-2014 10:04 PM
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cardguy Offline
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Post: #762
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I am a little tempted by this.

If only because after a couple of days without porn it reminds me of being a teenager again.

Interesting.
03-18-2014 03:02 PM
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Atavistic Offline
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Post: #763
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I haven't watched any type of porn since early February. It's been a little over a month, well if you count a few random pop-up pics and sex scenes on TV shows. However, I'm not counting that. I actually feel much better and haven't had any strong cravings. First few weeks were pretty bad. I'd like to give up masturbating but that's a whole nother ball game of discipline and self-mastery.
(This post was last modified: 03-18-2014 07:47 PM by Atavistic.)
03-18-2014 07:45 PM
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Teutatis Offline
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Post: #764
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
(03-05-2014 08:10 PM)dreambig Wrote:  So in total I managed 133 days.

That's incredible
03-18-2014 09:06 PM
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blueshark747 Offline
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Post: #765
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
(03-17-2014 10:04 PM)HankRearden Wrote:  I received some PMs from members asking me about my NoFap experience. As such, I have decided to write a longer post here about how porn affected me, and how quitting it has changed my life. You might call it a 'Quitting Porn Data Sheet' if that feels more familiar. If anyone needs an accountability partner, or wants to speak to me more privately about their problems I encourage you to PM me. As of this current cycle of quitting I am 9 weeks free from porn. My longest previous record was 129 days.

My story is probably an uncommon one: I am 21 years old and, when I decided to quit for real, I was probably at around 20-25 notches. (Since I've intentionally decided to stop counting, a story for another day). But was it really 'sex' with these girls? For 50% of the experiences I could barely get it up at all, for another 30% I probably hit mid-range capacity at best, and I had only ejaculated twice (once in a car and once in a bathroom on New Years). I never had a serious girlfriend. To fix this, I saw doctors in two separate countries and I learned nothing useful at all.

When I was younger I used to masturbate on my stomach against the bed, which probably crushed my nerve endings. I started this at a pretty young age. To this day I seriously struggle to masturbate 'normally' and would have to do it through my boxers in this weird circular motion. I have never met anyone else who does it the same way; it's clearly bizarre. I used to watch copious amounts of porn: 10 tabs going at once, for a better half of a decade. I have no doubt that this was my biggest problem.

One day I realized that the porn I was watching became more and more extreme. Remember when you were 11 and the mere sight of a girl on a poster in a bikini would excite you? How far I had fallen from that utopia! While the porn wasn't overly extreme, I noticed that my tastes began to escalate. I spoke about this to a close friend of mine, who confided in me that his doctor diagnosed him with HOCD (Trust me guys, google this. it alone should scare you into stopping), and that he had tested out shemale porn a few times which confused him because he thought he wasn't gay. I pause here to pose a to you all: do you think anyone is born attracted to shemale rape porn? Nevertheless, the existence of disgusting types of porn suggest that there is indeed a market for it. There are men out there who are so weak, and whose brains have been so destroyed by porn - think about the effect of two hours a day for decades - that they have no way out. They live in a dark, sick, abyss.

Hearing about his fucked up porn taste scared the living fuck out of me. I used to have a really high voice when I was younger, acted in plays and musicals, and because I was relatively fashion-aware I would be asked by girls probably once a year if I was gay. Could I be gay? I can tell if another guy is good looking. Does that make me gay? Does me not being able to finish with girls mean that I have latent homosexuality? Thankfully, because my friend went through this ordeal first I was able to put this all behind me.

After consulting some other sights I and getting my head together I once quit for 129 days. By the end, things were amazing. I felt like I had more concentration, I felt sharper, and most of all I noticed that I was MUCH better with women. I had more confidence with approaches, took rejection better, and just generally felt better about myself. I wonder if the extra testoterone might have helped with that.

The initial flatline was pretty intimidating as I had nothing going on down there for at least 2 months, but afterwards my erections were like tree trunks - that is to say they were fucking awesome.

I went to South East Asia and didn't jerk off for 7 weeks. I was on fire there with girls. I fucked a Thai girl in an alleyway on my second night in Asia.

I'm currently in Mexico, and again, have noticed that I care WAY more about getting with women than I normally do. I smile and flirt with girls during the day much more now, and on nights out I feel more animalistic.

But above all, I have some great news to share with my fellow RVFers:
I finished again from sex in Mexico City, and finished from my first blowjob ever (while shitfaced) in Cancun. I actually think I might be cured!!


Still, I need to be careful. I finished from sex back home recently but the sex was the kinkiest I've ever had and I feel that, as much as I enjoyed the hell out of it, it's going to bring me down a path that can lead back to porn. Either way, my goal is to live a life porn-free.

Below I will give you some reasons to quit porn, and then some steps on how to do it.

Why to Quit

1) a) Crushes the male libido. Do some Googling on this to see how serious it really is. 'Delayed Ejaculation' (the condition I suffered from) rates are soaring at an astronomical rate.

1) b) On the flipside, not masturbating can maintain your high libido and actually improve your game. It keeps testoterone high and your desires for women strong. You'll want sex more, and odds are you'll have more sex as a result.

2) Desensitizes you to traditional sex and morphs your sexual tastes.

3) It's a massive waste of time, for an ultimately meaningless orgasm.

4) It's been proven to be addictive. The longer you keep watching the longer it will take to stop. If you don't think you're addicted try to go three weeks without it. Tons of guys can't even go a full week...how sad is that?

5) If you're so inclined to have a girlfriend or get married one day, you don't want to be that 45 year old guy sneaking off to watch porn twice a week. It's pathetic. I mean, just imagine what it would look like if someone watched your masturbating: crouched over your computer, eyes red from staring, furiously slamming your dick into your hand... does it not seem a little juvenile?

6) For guys new to sex I think it really twists the idea of what sex is meant to be. Most young girls will be totally unaccustomed your concept of sex, and this can actually hurt your chances of having sex or continuing to have sex with a girl. For example, when I lost my virginity I spanked the girl's ass during it, assuming that it was standard procedure. She stopped and went "what was that for"? Absolutely crushing moment (although admittedly very funny in hindsight).

7) From a simple standpoint, most porn provides a third person view of porn and your hand provides a different stimulation than a vagina does. I kind of compare it to training for a tennis match by playing squash.

8) I have even pulled girls by telling them I don't watch porn. They're usually impressed to hear it (if they believe it) and it makes me stand out a bit, and seem less sex-oriented. If only they knew, if only they knew.

9) Tons of women in the industry are abused, and end up with serious drug addictions or committing suicide. One forum member once told me I was essentially a pussy for bringing this up, but I think his comment was unjustified. Just because you like to game women doesn't mean you have to assist an industry which ultimately ruins the lives of many women. I put this last because not all of you will be convinced by this. Fair enough, quit porn for YOU then!

Steps for Quitting:

1) It will never work unless you're serious about it - that is, you need to rationally convince yourself and explain to yourself WHY you are quitting. What is driving you to quit? What will this change in your life?

2) Find a trigger switch. Everytime you're about to open up a porn link do something immediately, almost without thinking, which is different. Do 20 pushups, walk up and down the stairs, put your ipod on for a bit. The key is that you get far away from your computer.

3) Download programs that help with this. There are programs which can block porn and I use one of them called K9 Blocker at home.

4) Believe it or not, I stumbled upon an amazing resource while looking for a way to get around the K9 Porn Blocker in a moment of weakness. Talk about a coincidence! You all NEED to join yourbrainrebalanced.com and create a blog about your path to quitting porn. However, before you do so, read some of the tragic stories of older members on the forum. Read about men whose wives have left them over porn, of 35 year old virgins, of broken men out that that are finally trying to quit. Do you want to end up like them? For me, this was the most important step. It finally showed me that there is a world of men out there who shared my problem, and that they were willing to do something about it. Honestly, I have so much praise for that forum.

5) Get an accountability partner. I personally didn't do this but it seems like a good plan.

6) Talk to your friends about this. I have gotten tons of friends to quit porn, which in turn puts pressure on me to keep it up. I owe it to myself and I owe it to them now.

7) This one is important as well. Just because you start a porn clip doesn't mean that you have lost! There is always a moment to quit the screen and walk out. For me, I would remind myself how feeble and debilitating the eventual orgasm would be, and the self-loathing I would experience after each time. You need to remind yourself why you are quitting, and how you aren't missing out on anything. That's the truth folks.

8) I'm about to say something controversial, and I apologize to moderators in advance if they don't like this. Please don't ban me. The truth is, you might need to spend some time away from this forum. One of the first things the experts say is that you need to reduce the amount of porn triggers you come across (i.e. things that give you the urge to masturbate). For many, reading stories about fucking on RVF, about gaming women hard, etc will be a trigger to masturbate as quite obviously one will get excited. In the same light I would recommend against watching movies with gratuitous sex scenes, against going to strip clubs, etc as well. This stuff is fairly obvious. Alternatively, maybe just stay away from Notches threads or Trip Reports and keep to more PG areas of the forum for a few weeks to see if you can get your feet off the ground - a small sacrifice to make for a big gain.

Finally, I should say that I'm far from perfect. Often at nights I find myself playing around with my dick in bed, perhaps edging at 20% to help me fall asleep. This is not ideal, and I should cut it out. That being said, I really feel like I'm on the right path now.

I have never met anyone who quit porn and found it to be anything other than worthwhile.

Good luck, gentleman!

I don't know it sounds like you've had other psychological problems.
Also at 21 your not even in your full mental sexual prime.
You've been fapping to internet porn since you were 11?

I feel your not even experienced enough to make generalized diagnosis with some of your points.

Really??? Fucking a Thai woman in an alleyway is something to brag about?
Those desperate sexual urges where I lose my maturity and actual class are something to look forward to?

The older you get you will find this stuff called "balance".

Where wacking off actually motivates you to go out and get more pussy.

The whole shemale porn thing you posted about also sounds ridiculous along with your reasons for quitting and effects.

Along with the whole 45 year old married man scenario, do you have experience with being married? Obviously not.

To each its own....
(This post was last modified: 03-18-2014 11:48 PM by blueshark747.)
03-18-2014 11:46 PM
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RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Anyone else feeling it?

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03-19-2014 06:22 AM
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RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
(03-18-2014 11:46 PM)blueshark747 Wrote:  
(03-17-2014 10:04 PM)HankRearden Wrote:  I received some PMs from members asking me about my NoFap experience. As such, I have decided to write a longer post here about how porn affected me, and how quitting it has changed my life. You might call it a 'Quitting Porn Data Sheet' if that feels more familiar. If anyone needs an accountability partner, or wants to speak to me more privately about their problems I encourage you to PM me. As of this current cycle of quitting I am 9 weeks free from porn. My longest previous record was 129 days.

My story is probably an uncommon one: I am 21 years old and, when I decided to quit for real, I was probably at around 20-25 notches. (Since I've intentionally decided to stop counting, a story for another day). But was it really 'sex' with these girls? For 50% of the experiences I could barely get it up at all, for another 30% I probably hit mid-range capacity at best, and I had only ejaculated twice (once in a car and once in a bathroom on New Years). I never had a serious girlfriend. To fix this, I saw doctors in two separate countries and I learned nothing useful at all.

When I was younger I used to masturbate on my stomach against the bed, which probably crushed my nerve endings. I started this at a pretty young age. To this day I seriously struggle to masturbate 'normally' and would have to do it through my boxers in this weird circular motion. I have never met anyone else who does it the same way; it's clearly bizarre. I used to watch copious amounts of porn: 10 tabs going at once, for a better half of a decade. I have no doubt that this was my biggest problem.

One day I realized that the porn I was watching became more and more extreme. Remember when you were 11 and the mere sight of a girl on a poster in a bikini would excite you? How far I had fallen from that utopia! While the porn wasn't overly extreme, I noticed that my tastes began to escalate. I spoke about this to a close friend of mine, who confided in me that his doctor diagnosed him with HOCD (Trust me guys, google this. it alone should scare you into stopping), and that he had tested out shemale porn a few times which confused him because he thought he wasn't gay. I pause here to pose a to you all: do you think anyone is born attracted to shemale rape porn? Nevertheless, the existence of disgusting types of porn suggest that there is indeed a market for it. There are men out there who are so weak, and whose brains have been so destroyed by porn - think about the effect of two hours a day for decades - that they have no way out. They live in a dark, sick, abyss.

Hearing about his fucked up porn taste scared the living fuck out of me. I used to have a really high voice when I was younger, acted in plays and musicals, and because I was relatively fashion-aware I would be asked by girls probably once a year if I was gay. Could I be gay? I can tell if another guy is good looking. Does that make me gay? Does me not being able to finish with girls mean that I have latent homosexuality? Thankfully, because my friend went through this ordeal first I was able to put this all behind me.

After consulting some other sights I and getting my head together I once quit for 129 days. By the end, things were amazing. I felt like I had more concentration, I felt sharper, and most of all I noticed that I was MUCH better with women. I had more confidence with approaches, took rejection better, and just generally felt better about myself. I wonder if the extra testoterone might have helped with that.

The initial flatline was pretty intimidating as I had nothing going on down there for at least 2 months, but afterwards my erections were like tree trunks - that is to say they were fucking awesome.

I went to South East Asia and didn't jerk off for 7 weeks. I was on fire there with girls. I fucked a Thai girl in an alleyway on my second night in Asia.

I'm currently in Mexico, and again, have noticed that I care WAY more about getting with women than I normally do. I smile and flirt with girls during the day much more now, and on nights out I feel more animalistic.

But above all, I have some great news to share with my fellow RVFers:
I finished again from sex in Mexico City, and finished from my first blowjob ever (while shitfaced) in Cancun. I actually think I might be cured!!


Still, I need to be careful. I finished from sex back home recently but the sex was the kinkiest I've ever had and I feel that, as much as I enjoyed the hell out of it, it's going to bring me down a path that can lead back to porn. Either way, my goal is to live a life porn-free.

Below I will give you some reasons to quit porn, and then some steps on how to do it.

Why to Quit

1) a) Crushes the male libido. Do some Googling on this to see how serious it really is. 'Delayed Ejaculation' (the condition I suffered from) rates are soaring at an astronomical rate.

1) b) On the flipside, not masturbating can maintain your high libido and actually improve your game. It keeps testoterone high and your desires for women strong. You'll want sex more, and odds are you'll have more sex as a result.

2) Desensitizes you to traditional sex and morphs your sexual tastes.

3) It's a massive waste of time, for an ultimately meaningless orgasm.

4) It's been proven to be addictive. The longer you keep watching the longer it will take to stop. If you don't think you're addicted try to go three weeks without it. Tons of guys can't even go a full week...how sad is that?

5) If you're so inclined to have a girlfriend or get married one day, you don't want to be that 45 year old guy sneaking off to watch porn twice a week. It's pathetic. I mean, just imagine what it would look like if someone watched your masturbating: crouched over your computer, eyes red from staring, furiously slamming your dick into your hand... does it not seem a little juvenile?

6) For guys new to sex I think it really twists the idea of what sex is meant to be. Most young girls will be totally unaccustomed your concept of sex, and this can actually hurt your chances of having sex or continuing to have sex with a girl. For example, when I lost my virginity I spanked the girl's ass during it, assuming that it was standard procedure. She stopped and went "what was that for"? Absolutely crushing moment (although admittedly very funny in hindsight).

7) From a simple standpoint, most porn provides a third person view of porn and your hand provides a different stimulation than a vagina does. I kind of compare it to training for a tennis match by playing squash.

8) I have even pulled girls by telling them I don't watch porn. They're usually impressed to hear it (if they believe it) and it makes me stand out a bit, and seem less sex-oriented. If only they knew, if only they knew.

9) Tons of women in the industry are abused, and end up with serious drug addictions or committing suicide. One forum member once told me I was essentially a pussy for bringing this up, but I think his comment was unjustified. Just because you like to game women doesn't mean you have to assist an industry which ultimately ruins the lives of many women. I put this last because not all of you will be convinced by this. Fair enough, quit porn for YOU then!

Steps for Quitting:

1) It will never work unless you're serious about it - that is, you need to rationally convince yourself and explain to yourself WHY you are quitting. What is driving you to quit? What will this change in your life?

2) Find a trigger switch. Everytime you're about to open up a porn link do something immediately, almost without thinking, which is different. Do 20 pushups, walk up and down the stairs, put your ipod on for a bit. The key is that you get far away from your computer.

3) Download programs that help with this. There are programs which can block porn and I use one of them called K9 Blocker at home.

4) Believe it or not, I stumbled upon an amazing resource while looking for a way to get around the K9 Porn Blocker in a moment of weakness. Talk about a coincidence! You all NEED to join yourbrainrebalanced.com and create a blog about your path to quitting porn. However, before you do so, read some of the tragic stories of older members on the forum. Read about men whose wives have left them over porn, of 35 year old virgins, of broken men out that that are finally trying to quit. Do you want to end up like them? For me, this was the most important step. It finally showed me that there is a world of men out there who shared my problem, and that they were willing to do something about it. Honestly, I have so much praise for that forum.

5) Get an accountability partner. I personally didn't do this but it seems like a good plan.

6) Talk to your friends about this. I have gotten tons of friends to quit porn, which in turn puts pressure on me to keep it up. I owe it to myself and I owe it to them now.

7) This one is important as well. Just because you start a porn clip doesn't mean that you have lost! There is always a moment to quit the screen and walk out. For me, I would remind myself how feeble and debilitating the eventual orgasm would be, and the self-loathing I would experience after each time. You need to remind yourself why you are quitting, and how you aren't missing out on anything. That's the truth folks.

8) I'm about to say something controversial, and I apologize to moderators in advance if they don't like this. Please don't ban me. The truth is, you might need to spend some time away from this forum. One of the first things the experts say is that you need to reduce the amount of porn triggers you come across (i.e. things that give you the urge to masturbate). For many, reading stories about fucking on RVF, about gaming women hard, etc will be a trigger to masturbate as quite obviously one will get excited. In the same light I would recommend against watching movies with gratuitous sex scenes, against going to strip clubs, etc as well. This stuff is fairly obvious. Alternatively, maybe just stay away from Notches threads or Trip Reports and keep to more PG areas of the forum for a few weeks to see if you can get your feet off the ground - a small sacrifice to make for a big gain.

Finally, I should say that I'm far from perfect. Often at nights I find myself playing around with my dick in bed, perhaps edging at 20% to help me fall asleep. This is not ideal, and I should cut it out. That being said, I really feel like I'm on the right path now.

I have never met anyone who quit porn and found it to be anything other than worthwhile.

Good luck, gentleman!

I don't know it sounds like you've had other psychological problems.
Also at 21 your not even in your full mental sexual prime.
You've been fapping to internet porn since you were 11?

I feel your not even experienced enough to make generalized diagnosis with some of your points.

Really??? Fucking a Thai woman in an alleyway is something to brag about?
Those desperate sexual urges where I lose my maturity and actual class are something to look forward to?

The older you get you will find this stuff called "balance".

Where wacking off actually motivates you to go out and get more pussy.

The whole shemale porn thing you posted about also sounds ridiculous along with your reasons for quitting and effects.

Along with the whole 45 year old married man scenario, do you have experience with being married? Obviously not.

To each its own....

I have never had any psychological problems, nor do I expect to have any, unless you count a teenage addiction to porn. Although I'm not a doctor, I would imagine that if you can't go 3 weeks without porn you're probably addicted. This might be a good way for some of you to see whether or not you are addicted. If you're not, and you don't think porn is affecting you, then you're lucky. Otherwise...

I've probably used internet porn since I was 11-13, although it's hard to say exactly. I don't think the difference in 2 years is relevant. The point is that I, like most other guys, would use it daily for a period of years. This process effectively 'rewires' the brain to very different tastes.

The Thai girl experience wasn't really a bragging point, it was more to say that the lack of porn and increased sex drive probably brought out a different side of me. Guys here use the word 'caveman' with frequency, and it could be described as that.

Thanks for telling me about the concept of "balance", one which I am already very aware of. The problem is that most guys simply do not jerk off once every 2 weeks to softcore porn with condoms on... it's more like jerking off daily to some variant much more extreme. And herein lies the problem, once you've grown use to this cycle it's extremely hard to break it.

The shemale porn example was a true story my friend told me, I'm not sure what more to say. I brought it up because it shows just how far one can fall when being addicted to porn. He has since quit porn and smoking weed, which for him was doubly addictive and problematic, and totally changed his life. When we go out together he's a huge threat now and pulls way way way more girls than he used to. He used to be unable to even hold basic eye contact with girls he was so insecure.

(On that note, I found that after jerking off in the past I too would be worse with holding eye contact later that day. Just a small piece of anecdotal evidence)

If you weren't banned I would have asked you which reasons/steps for quitting are ridiculous because I looked them over and they seem pretty logical to me.

And as for the married man, I don't need to be married to have an opinion on the weak behaviour of sneaking off to jerk off when your wife isn't looking, much like I don't need to be a climatologist to have an opinion on global warming.

It seems you don't have a problem with porn. Count your blessings!

For the rest of us mortals, I'm not embarrassed to admit that I used to have a problem and don't anymore. That's all, really.
03-19-2014 09:58 AM
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Peregrine Offline
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RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Nice writeup, Hank. blueshark was probably trolling you. I'm currently on day 3 and feeling it. Still undecided on whether I want to quit completely or limit to once every seven days (and if once a week, whether it's with porn or not).
03-19-2014 10:27 AM
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Post: #769
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Great sheet Hank.

As for me, I've been trying to quit for too long now. I need to do something different.

Last night I fapped after watching porn for about 20 minutes. I realized one of my problems is that even when I have good streaks (PR = 45 days), I'm still watching a few minutes of porn here and there throughout the day. Eventually, I watch porn for about 20 minutes and then the temptation is too strong and I say "fuck it," and jerk off. It's terrible.

I think this stems from a need for constant media, kind of like in Roosh's post here. So, during the day, I need my little dopamine "bump," and I watch about five minutes of porn. This ends up adding up to have detrimental effects. When I'm having sex regularly, it doesn't really matter, because my sex drive is getting fed anyway.

However, if I'm not having sex, eventually I'll end up fapping. I haven't had sex since Saturday and I think that's definitely why the porn watching was not avoidable like I usually think it is.

I'm going to try to be more mindful of my actions. Why do I watch porn for 5 minutes while I wake up? While I'm on the toilet? Because it feeds my brain. But if throughout the day I'm constantly thinking, "will this improve me or my life?" I might not relapse.

I need to accept that porn is the problem. Porn causes me to masturbate. I've had weeks where I'm either on vacation, traveling, studying for finals week, or just away from the computer. During these weeks, I don't feel the urge to masturbate.

Anyways, back to Hank's post, I think I might want an accountability partner. I don't have anyone IRL who I can talk to about this, and I'd like to be able to talk it out when I get bad urges. I think it'd also be good to keep each other motivated. If anyone wants to give it a try, PM me and we'll see if we get along well.

Good luck everyone!

"Every saint has a past, every sinner a future."
03-19-2014 11:34 AM
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Post: #770
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I'm on day 202 now, but only no porn. I still masturbate relatively regularly such as 3 to 5 times a week and sometimes more but I must say it feels a lot more natural now that I exclusively think of recent bangs while doing it or just get rid of my morning borner without fantasizing about anything at all. I have nothing against people who simultaneously quit the fapping and I saw some benefits during my 30-day-no-jerk-off-experiment, but in the end I see nothing unnatural about masturbating (as opposed to online porn). As long as you don't exaggerate it with daily multiple jerk-off sessions, fapping is okay, imho.

Porn has become nothing more than a distant memory to me and I have zero desire to get back to that shit. Some weeks ago, I was in a sex shop with a regular of mine and I randomly stopped at the movie section. Simply watching the frontcovers of those DVDs left me totally indifferent and I was a thousand times more interested in getting my girl some new lingerie. The longer I've been staying away from porn, the more I come to realize how pathetic it actually was to watch other guys banging women on a daily basis. What is the point of that? I don't want to chime in with the anti-gay faction on this forum but isn't it strange that due to porn millions of straight men constantly stare at erected penises?

A man should strive to get sex in real life. No excuses.

I don't agree with everything Hank writes but he is totally on the right track and the more young cats like him quit porn the better.
(This post was last modified: 03-19-2014 05:17 PM by Flint.)
03-19-2014 05:15 PM
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Post: #771
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
(03-19-2014 05:15 PM)Flint Wrote:  I'm on day 202 now, but only no porn. I still masturbate relatively regularly such as 3 to 5 times a week and sometimes more but I must say it feels a lot more natural now that I exclusively think of recent bangs while doing it or just get rid of my morning borner without fantasizing about anything at all. I have nothing against people who simultaneously quit the fapping and I saw some benefits during my 30-day-no-jerk-off-experiment, but in the end I see nothing unnatural about masturbating (as opposed to online porn). As long as you don't exaggerate it with daily multiple jerk-off sessions, fapping is okay, imho.

Porn has become nothing more than a distant memory to me and I have zero desire to get back to that shit. Some weeks ago, I was in a sex shop with a regular of mine and I randomly stopped at the movie section. Simply watching the frontcovers of those DVDs left me totally indifferent and I was a thousand times more interested in getting my girl some new lingerie. The longer I've been staying away from porn, the more I come to realize how pathetic it actually was to watch other guys banging women on a daily basis. What is the point of that? I don't want to chime in with the anti-gay faction on this forum but isn't it strange that due to porn millions of straight men constantly stare at erected penises?

A man should strive to get sex in real life. No excuses.

I don't agree with everything Hank writes but he is totally on the right track and the more young cats like him quit porn the better.

I'm happy you brought this up Flint.

I am of the belief that ALL porn and masturbation, together or mutually exclusive, can be harmful. For some, only the porn part is toxic. For others, it's probably both. I think it's fair to say that everyone will be different.

From the material I've read on yourbrainonporn.com, they argue that you can still achieve the same results by quitting porn only and continuing to masturbate, although the process of rewiring takes longer. This makes a lot of sense to me.

If you choose to go down this (much easier) path, make sure that you're not jerking off to porn ideas in your own head. For example, what Flint does is WAY better when fantasizing about actual girls he knows/has banged. In some ways, I imagine this might even make the actual act of sex with a girl even better if you've thought about her before in that way.

Thus, I might alter my previous recommendation by saying that if you really really can't kick the masturbation, then just start by stopping the porn use. That being said, I'm willing to bet that some of you can't even masturbate without porn. I sure as hell couldn't when I first tried to quit.

@Redbeard: A lot of the problem stems from habit, you're exactly right. You put on porn because 'why not', it's something to do. You nailed a bit part of it in my opinion. If you are away from triggers on your vacation you don't feel the urge, but when you wake up and your computer is near, or when you're on the toilet and want to kill time, it just happens. I used to do something not too dissimilar, in that sometimes I would watch porn and not even finish. Biggest waste of time, majorly unhealthy dopamine rush, and just plain bad.

PS - I know this is going to seem not believable to some, in light of the recentness of my big post, but I noticed that today I pulled a triple-check on a billboard. A fucking billboard of a hot girl. I didn't get hard or anything but that's something I probably wouldn't have even noticed 5 years from now. Just something to add I guess.
(This post was last modified: 03-19-2014 08:38 PM by HankRearden.)
03-19-2014 08:12 PM
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Post: #772
RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Good tips. I think I'm going to make going pornfree my current goal. I've been trying to quit both porn and masturbation for so long that it might be good to try a new approach. This way I should only really need to masturbate once every week or two, so as long as I can do that with no porn it'll be a progression.

"Every saint has a past, every sinner a future."
03-19-2014 08:42 PM
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RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
I relapsed. Day 1...

03-21-2014 01:56 AM
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RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Day 5. Edged a few times in moments of weakness/in bed in the morning, but didn't finish. Will try to re-wire by doing 20 pushups every time I touch my dick. (I'm also not getting laid right now, so this is pretty rough.)

I can already feel the benefits though.
03-21-2014 01:37 PM
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RE: NoPorn / NoFap Google Group - For Those Who're Serious
Anyone know much about chicks?

Do they get overwhelming urges to masturbate? And if so - I wonder how often?
03-21-2014 01:46 PM
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