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The Approach Thread
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Gorgiass Offline
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Posts: 733
Joined: May 2014
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Post: #3176
RE: The Approach Thread
^Where are you that you can find 20 girls worth approaching in 3 hours? Damn, I biked around for 3 hours today and got in two approaches! Location, location.

Earlier this week I got a number from an underage girl who didn't tell me her age and then her mom texted me which threw me off so I've been more conservative than I otherwise might be.

Biking, saw a couple cute coeds coming at me, stopped 15 ft in front of them, solid eye contact (behind mirrored glasses) "Hey, you guys are gorgeous. Spring break just starting or just ending for you?"
"Just ending" they kept walking by, cuter girl smiled and wanted to stop but her friend didn't slow
"Stop, don't walk out of my life forever!"
Cute one turned and gave a full genuine laugh but they kept going.

On the beach saw an early 20s girl half-covered in sand (mermaid) and sand castle with a trashed high heel (clearly pulled from the ocean) in front with her friend beside her, stopped in front of them "Wow, that's pretty good, you guys are getting into it. What's this thing?"
"ha, thanks, that's our sandcastle"
"What's with the heel, you guys danced so hard last night you broke your shoes and decided to put the to use any way you can?"
Talked for a bit, dropped bait about going to play frisbee with my friends further down the beach and invited them, got a number. Was texting and plans to meet up but then the girl I've been seeing down here hit me up and I met up with her and ghosted the other one, think I lost it.
03-19-2017 09:07 PM
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BetaNoMore Offline
Recovering Beta

Posts: 155
Joined: Jun 2015
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Post: #3177
RE: The Approach Thread
Gorgiass, I live in an upper tier II city and with tons of beautiful women. You can easily do 100 approaches an hour in the downtown core.

Did an hr today in the DT core. Wasn't feeling it because I did so many yesterday and felt a bit burned out. Sucked it up and approached. Only 2 went decently well. Quite a bit of internal AA at the beginning.

Approach 1: Said excuse me to a 7/10 blond. Mid 20s. Looked relatively normal but dressed decently well. She did not look receptive. Maybe it was in my head. But I ejected and said never mind.


Approach 2: 7.5/10 small asian girl. Looked like a party girl because of her nails. Tons of makeup but in workout clothes. Standard opener. She was friendly but said she had a bf and told me thanks.


Approach 3: 6/10 asian girl. Did not look like a party girl. Early 20s. Can tell she would be gf type material:

Standard opener. She was friendly.

She told me she was shopping. I told her I had an hr to kill and was walking around the city because it's finally a nice day (I commented on the weather again later but I'm sure it was fine).

She told me she was in the library reading. I cold read her and said she must be into non fiction. She said she was reading something about fashion. I commented on how she likes to expand her mind. She she said she studies psych. She asked me what I do. I told her to guess and she'd never be able to.

She then said accountant or something. I pretended to leave and then jokingly said she should list off a bunch of stereotypical asian jobs. I also then teased and said she should guess a bunch of asian names. Gave her a light touch on the elbow.

I asked her if she was busy. She said kind of because she was going home. I said: "that's not busy! how do you feel about going for a coffee with me right now?"

She hesitated then said no thanks. I said that's cool.

Connection: 2.75/5. A bit more than lukewarm but not a lot. She was there and didn't seem like she wanted to leave.

Convo fun/flirty:/b] 3/5. Not bad. Got some push-pull in. Need to be working on that but I tend to do that okay (if anything I often push too much). Need to do more emotional spikes.

I wonder if I could have gotten her for a coffee if I built more comfort. She seemed fine to chat but then was hesitant when I went for the kill. She's also definitely not a party girl that looks like she gets a ton of chad cock so it's weird that she didn't open up to me more because I feel like I'm above her level and we're the same ethnicity.

Maybe for these girls I need to build a lot more comfort before asking to get something in return. They may be shy.


Approach 4: White girl. 6.5-7/10. Dressed in a flannel coat. Early 20s. Standard opener. Weaker energy. She then said: "uhhh is there is a pick up convention going on? This has happened 3 times in the past 15 min!"

I was shook. I tried to pretend that I didn't know what she was talking about but then I politely ejected.

Notes: I need to get off the main shopping streets of the DT core. There's 2 streets that are infested with PUAs and will only get worse as the weather gets better. It's a waste. I don't care how good your game is, if a girl has been approached 5x by a bunch of dudes, most of whom are socially awkward, she's going to be a no go. Luckily there are a lot of places in the city to game but the downtown core is certainly the best and most convenient.


Approach 5:
some chick from venezuala. Face was terrible. Had to excuse myself.


Approach 6: Regular (maybe nerdy?) looking girl in her early 20s. Kind of cute but not great. 6/10. This is a set I should have done better on.

Standard opener.

She was very receptive. She was on the phone but then paused or hung up her call.

I was nervous. Rambling on. Tonality was terrible. I find that when my tonality and mindset are good, stuff flows and I don't force it. This time I did. It didn't help that she didn't give me much to work with. Her answers were short but she was in no rush to leave.

Me: "so what are you up to?'

Her; "walking and shopping"

Me: "oh ya? what for?"

Her: "oh just some shoes"

didn't get a lot from her. I commented on her shoes and said they're nice. Our responses were both short, logical. I then asked if stores are still open now. She said yes. I asked her if she was in a rush (LOOOOL) she said no. She stood squared to me the whole time. I excused myself.


this could be a girl where she might be interested but is shy and isn't great at convo. I need to get better. Need to ramble but in a calm manner. More open questions. MORE COLD READING. My god I could have cold read. "Oh, those shoes are very arty. I'm getting a feeling that you're an arty type of person". Something like that. Anything!


Approach 7: Hot euro chick. 8/10. Mid 20s. Weak approach. She said she was sorry but had to meet her friend.

Maybe more commanding next time?


Approach 8: 6.5/10 white chick but dresses like a party girl. My height. A bit thicker but in all the right places. 18! Best approach of the day just because of the result, but because of my tonality, presence , mindset. This was a fun set.

Standard opener... then... I noticed her braces.

Me: "wait a sec! your'e not in HS are you?"

she laughed and said no and started to walk away.

Me: "hey hold up!" She stopped.

I asked her what she was up to. She said she just got off work and works at nordstorm and said women's department. I said I love that place and go there all the time. We both laughed because I didn't make it clear that I don't go to the women's section. I said I got my boots there and get them shined all the time.

I asked her how it is working in a large corporate department store. Blah blah blah. I cold read and said she seems like a people person. She said ya obvoiusly she has to be working retail. I said she could be faking it and then be going home and crying herself to sleep all night.

She asked me what I do for work. Eventually I asked her what she was up to. She said she was going home to meet a friend. I said we should go for an adventure and grab a tea over at the starbucks. It seems like she was considering it but then said sorry she really has to meet her friend. I said I should grab her number and then take her on a real adventure.

Then I said "wait a second, you're not even legal age." she told me that she has a fake and showed me. I looked at it and laughed and said it does'nt even look like her. She said it worked all weekend. I then said "wow you're trouble... but kind of cute." PUSH PULL! I asked her about her schedule. She told me and said maybe thurs/fri works for her. I said probably weekend is best for me but I'll contact her.

She asked for my age. I told her to guess and that asians are the same 15-55. She guessed 23 and was shocked that I said early 30s. Got her number. Texted. Zero reply.

Connection: 3.75/5

Convo fun/flirty: 3.75-4/5


Slightly surprised that she didn't reply. Maybe the age difference, maybe I'm not her type but that was a good set. Cold read, push pulled, joked around, good presence, tonality. Although I shouldn't be surprised because this dry spell has just been retarded with no end in sight.


Approach 9:

Decided to switch things up and do a 2 set. 1 white chick about 6.5/10, the other asian chick 6/10. The asian chick asked me if this is game. I said "game? as in video cameras? ya there's one on the rooftop"

She said "oh no, it's happening in _______ (a different city). it's becoming popular" and they walked off. The white chick seemed some what interested.


Need to get the hell away from this area for the majority of my gaming. And not to go off on a tangent too much but I certainly appreciate a woman being annoyed if she is constantly getting spam approached but on the flip side, to be annoyed at the idea of men approaching is hilarious. So guys should just give up and then the chads can just line up on tinder and the women can offer their holes to them. Women are just too spoiled.


Odds and ends:

- 20 approaches a day may be too much. Fewer a day but more consistency is probably better. But I do take about 3 or so to get warmed up.

- Need to get out of those two streets. I understand that other guys are also fighting to improve but this is stupid and will only get worse. I wouldn't be surprised if there are as many as 20 guys running sets on those 2 streets during peak hours in the summer. I even saw one of the heavy hitting pick up coaches in this city doing bootcamps with 2 guys. Probably better to also game during my daily errands. Probably even better to try to join an intramural league or infiltrate some social activities and try to be a normal cool guy. Cold approaches are tough with low success rate.

- The numbers from yesterday...

- The girl with the nice heels. She responded but basically politely kept turning me down with "I'm too busy" when I tried to meet. I persisted a bit without being needy but no dice.

- No dice from the slutty looking redhead english girl.

- Mild to moderate lead with the girl with whom I share mutual contacts. I tried to incorporate the idea of "social capital" from RSD Todd and basically chatted with her a bit over the text before going for the kill. I think this is the play for weary girls. She shit tested me and said: "hahah I'll see. I don't go out easily with people"

I said "Ha! A misanthrope." and told her I have a busy week coming up but I'll message her end of the week and see where she's at. Best play I've done with texting. I'm a terrible texter but this seemed to diffuse her by withdrawing a bit back.

She said: "LOL slightly. Ya sure why not" and asked me why I'm busy. WE exchanged a few more texts and asked if I had snapchat. I said I don't have it so "we'll have to connect the good old fashioned way of texting lol."

She said that's fine. I told her tty so and good night.

I think this is important. Unless the girl is super eager, maybe the best way is to try to connect just a tad to disarm her, give her good feelings that you're not crazy and then ask for a meet without being too needy.

- The retarded streak continues but gotta keep fighting. At least my BJJ is improving Dodgy
(This post was last modified: 03-20-2017 01:03 AM by BetaNoMore.)
03-20-2017 12:49 AM
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BetaNoMore Offline
Recovering Beta

Posts: 155
Joined: Jun 2015
Reputation: 2
Post: #3178
RE: The Approach Thread
Two from today. Didn't feel great. Couldn't sleep. Was able to get out of work stuff early so I went to a shopping centre to get chipotle. I dressed well.

Approach 1: Late 20s white chick. Standard. Didn't seem overtly like a party girl just looked like a basic white chick. 6-6.5/10 but a thick layer of make up. We made eye contact as I was walking by and I immediately did my standard opener. She was receptive.

She was holding a lottery ticket and I lightly teased her about it. She said she was just on a small trip a few hrs away and for some reason she thinks she has a better chance to win when she's farther away. She was going to cash her $5.

We talked about a few different things. What we did for school, her recent trip to go skiing with a bunch of friends. She said she booked the day off because she knew it'd be a big trip. I lightly teased her about skipping work to go party. I cold read her and said:

me: "hmmm you seem like a people person."

her: "ya I am"

Me: "are you in some sort of marketing?"

she said not really. Then she told me she studied psychology in university but she isn't really doing something related to the field. I guessed HR and was correct.

We said a few more things. The convo actually flowed well. I didn't feel like I needed to pepper her with questions. I was calm, had a good presence, teased a bit, laughed a bit. Turns out she probably was a party girl and road the carousal. Can tell with the amount of makeup but she said she's 28 now but used to party but not anymore because she's old.

Eventually I said: "I need to go grab a bite to eat. But I'd like to continue our convo..."

She said: "would you like my number?"

Me: "ya that would make sense eh?"

I didn't opt for an instadate people she was meeting her friend for coffee soon and I was wanting to eat.

I'm going to give a new rating just so I can see if my actions and intuition are correct and for record keeping. It'll be a "man factor." Just how posed, masculine, and how strong my eye contact was, etc.

Man factor: 3.75/5

Connection: 3/5. No crazy connection. She asked me one or two questions but not a lot. Convo flowed though. Interestingly, I'm pretty good at reading initial reactions and body language. For the first half of the approach, her feet were slightly angled away. As the convo kept going and I kept pushing through, she moved squared to me.

fun/flirty factor: 2.75/5. Nothing great. Just a normal conversation that flowed easily. Didn't lead towards any sexualization or anything. I'm still weary of doing this in the middle of the day. I'll need to learn the art of doing this at the right time, with the right person, and not making it egregious.


I thought that there would be a decent (but not strong) chance that something would arise. She's 28, I think I'm good looking enough, style is good, the approach was good enough. But alas, no reply.


Approach 2:

Early 20's white chick. 6.5/10. Probably just as good looking as the prevoius one but isn't dolled up. Seems quite.

Standard opener. She blushed, kind of snorted, was nervous. Said thanks but said she would keep walking.

I wonder if I should have pressed harder for her to stop.


On another note, I made a restart text to the Irish chick with whom I had that date with that I mentioned previously. It's been about a month.

I was surprised she replied at all.

Me: "So I was walking around downtown yesterday and saw all the Celtic festivities which then made me wonder why you weren't playing in the bands Tongue"

She sent me a picture of her outside of work dressed in an irish outfit.

Her: "Sorry, was at work since 2. Couldn't play in the bands because I had to work, I did dress up though..."

Me: "Oh that's awesome. I was only joking about playing in the band but you surprise me yet again Wink. Would you play this instrument:"

*I sent her a pic of a shillelagh*

her: "what instrument? Smile"

Me: "What? You're telling me a shillelagh isn't for irish music?"

Her: "I have no idea what that thing is *hiding monkey face"

me: "haha . how have you been?"

her: "been pretty good. Working non stop. think I had 3 days off in the last month. how about you?"

I told her I've been busy too but my work stuff is about to end soon then...

me: "I'm thinking about celebrating (the end of it) with some gelato next weekend. you want to join me?"

her: "sure. I'll hit you up when I get my schedule Smile"

her: "oh shoot! I just realized next weekend is my birthday so thats kind of booked up! But I'm sure we can make something work"

Me: "oh that sounds exciting and troublesome! Ya for sure. We'll figure something out. Connect later this week. Night."


- lol wtf. is this normal behaviour for a girl? Have a good date where we connect like crazy. Make out like crazy then she ghosts. But then responds after I restart a month later?

- I'm not going to hold my breath because this is a low % play and I just have been beaten down with no success. I fully expect her not to message me with her schedule so I'll wait until the weekend to text happy birthday. Then I'm sure she'll respond. I'll wait a few days before trying to set something up again.

- I really think that doing this chill, banter a little bit before going for the meet is necessary. Just going straight to: "OH HAI LET'S MEET UP" seems like scare off these chicks unless they're super into you.

General notes:

- Sounds like a broken record now. I'm not sure why the hell I'm struggling so much or where I need to improve. I got RSD Todd's daygame (and will study that once my work schedule clears up). But I've watched a few hotseat things and to be honest, my good sets are comparable to his decent sets. At the very least, being well dressed, in shape (not jacked), not ugly and being able to have a decently fun convo should lead me at least somewhere! But it's not. I wonder if I'm cursed or if I'm paying for my past sins. Or maybe there's just some intangible about me that makes me repulsive to women.

Is it possible to just go on a downswing for no reason?

Gotta keep pushing though.
(This post was last modified: 03-21-2017 12:34 AM by BetaNoMore.)
03-21-2017 12:33 AM
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BetaNoMore Offline
Recovering Beta

Posts: 155
Joined: Jun 2015
Reputation: 2
Post: #3179
RE: The Approach Thread
The late 20's white chick responded to my text and actually engaged in convo. However, her response times were basically 24 hrs.

[Image: H15dvaH.png]

[Image: mCFgilu.png]

[Image: Hu4e0Ej.png]

[Image: 5LM1OR9.png]


- It seems that it's never good when girls take that long to respond even if they engage in convo.

- Apparently girls will engage in convo for some reason when they have no intention of seeing you again.

- Messages could have been shorter but I don't think it was terrible.


odds and ends:

- I haven't put the latest batch of approaches in my spreadsheet yet but I think I've hit around 80 approaches. I'll do a breakdown of how many approaches went "well" etc but just off the top of my head, I had 1 instadate, 1 number that lead to a date, and a handful of numbers that either didn't reply or went no where. I only had a few outright blow outs. Given the 80 or so approaches, the results are not good but 80 is a small sample size.

- New mindset approach to this whole thing: I've mentioned multiple times that I've been stuck in this baffling rut and that it really shouldn't be this difficult and I should at least have better than the zero success I'm having now.

I won't be mentioned these things anymore. What is it that I'm looking for when I'm mentioning these things? Even though I believe that my assessments are accurate, it isn't NOT helpful and doesn't change the reality of the situation. I'm not going to say that I'll start becoming deluded but in essence, the complaining only puts me in a negative frame of mind, making my mind cling onto these thoughts and emotions even more making me worse off. The thoughts will still be there but by not putting them down, I can hopefully better accept them and let them pass.

- I'll need to do a total of 500 or so approaches before I can start taking an objective look at the trends and perhaps look for other possible solutions.

The biggest fear in this is staring at the potential that your best just isn't good enough and that there's something about you that is defective but you don't know what it is and you don't know how to fix it. But there's one outcome that is even worse: having regrets from not trying at all. This will be what keeps me pushing forward.
(This post was last modified: Yesterday 06:34 PM by BetaNoMore.)
Yesterday 06:18 PM
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