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Why Hasn't Game Worked?
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #451
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
(03-10-2017 05:00 PM)ms224 Wrote:  GM, do you think great adventures are supposed to be easy?

No of course they're not, and mine's been very, VERY hard. But as much as they're supposed to involve difficulty, they're also supposed to involve reward. They're supposed to have endings - or at least small rewards along the way. I'm not asking for a magic wand to finish the adventure - or even for the adventure to finish at all, since, after all, Life isn't supposed to stop being an adventure. I'm just asking for the adventure to involve a chick. A reward. SOMETHING.

But my journey has been the opposite of this. It's been a long series of challenges, which I've faced down, one by one. A long series of fears, which I've conquered, one by one. A long series of "dark nights of the soul", where I thought I just couldn't go on anymore, and then picked myself up and went on, again and again, one after another after another. I can't even count how many times I've reached "rock bottom", the point where I was most tempted to give up (and at which point most people would have given up), and kept going anyway, and found the light at the end of the tunnel.

The problem is, every single time, that light turned out to be an illusion, a false promise. Nothing happened. Nothing significant. And then I went into a another tunnel, faced another dark night, felt temptation to quit, persevered, and found the light once again... only to find out that it's an illusion, just like the previous time.

I've been through so many dark nights and rock bottoms that it's getting old. It's BORING now. It's boring because there's no reward involved. Other people might face a similar number of challenges, but, if they're stalwart enough to overcome them, they experience reward - some intensely pleasurable experience to remind them of WHY they persevered through their challenges, to reinforce the fact that challenges are WORTH overcoming.

I don't get those rewards. They're just missing from the equation.

Imagine slaying a dragon, and finding out that the princess was just a mannequin, leading you to another castle with another dragon.

Then you go slay that dragon, and there's another mannequin, pointing you to the next castle. It's like the original Super Mario Brothers. That's my life.

Mario, that poor fucker, he could have banged the princess after each castle. That would have been fair. Slay a dragon, bang a princess. I don't think that's asking for a lot - after all, we're talking about slaying fucking dragons, an incredibly difficult feat that most men wouldn't even attempt, and most who attempt fail at. To have a simple reward at the end of that? Not unreasonable to me.

Or at least ONE princess after every TEN dragons. That's REALLY not asking for a lot.

But it hasn't happened. There's been no reward, and even though my neocortex still believes with 100% confidence that the journey is worthwhile, my hypothalamus/reward-circuitry is not having much to work with anymore.
(This post was last modified: 03-12-2017 08:52 AM by thegreenman.)
03-12-2017 08:39 AM
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TTQQTT Offline
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Post: #452
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
(03-10-2017 12:05 PM)thegreenman Wrote:  I find it truly inconceivable that any guy can be happy without some kind of "feminine presence" in his life. As far as I know, we are yang and they are yin - we are complimentary opposites that are fundamentally, metaphysically interdependent on one another, since the Dawn of Creation. For a yang to exist in completion without a yin is like asking for a magnet with only one pole, or an atom with only protons. It's physically impossible, at the level of the most basic building blocks of the universe.

Now I'm open to being wrong about that. I'm always open to questioning my beliefs, and, if they're shown to be wrong, letting go of them and welcoming new ones. If it's not true, I don't want to believe it. But everything I've ever seen and every moment in this life I've ever experienced have shown me that it IS true.

It hurts. EXISTING hurts. It's like one of the science-fiction movies where the monster says "it hurts to exist, put me out of my misery", and the poor thing's very existence is inextricably made out of suffering. But there's ONE difference between that situation and mine: ONE thing that alleviates the pain. GIRLS.

They do more than alleviate it. They spontaneously transform it into pleasure. Sweetness. All they have to do is be near me. To talk to me. To allow me to bask in the radiant glow of their femininity. And the pain of mere existence is transformed into pleasure. I LOVE being alive on this Earth.

And then they keep walking, and the glow recedes, and I'm back to suffering again.

Every moment of every day hurts. Every moment is a struggle to suppress or ignore or "deal with" the pain enough to function. Every moment of every day, I want to crawl back in bed and go to sleep, and not be conscious, so that the pain of existing will not be there. Every time I've ever smiled, it was fake, because I was in pain underneath. Every approach. Every time I went hiking. Every beautiful sunset I've ever viewed. All were made possible by a suppression/compartmentalization of the pain of sexual isolation. In every one of those moments, I was compartmentalizing it, but just barely. Enough to function without people noticing. Or without them noticing *too much.*

Except when I was near girls.

I don't know if this will help(more so coming from a 20 years old guy), but have you read The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus? You can be happy with absolutely nothing. Just the simple fact that you exist is a win, so keep trying... but you shouldn't put your happiness on something other than yourself.
03-12-2017 08:42 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #453
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
(03-10-2017 11:48 AM)Zelcorpion Wrote:  Then fuck optimism.

Go about improving one aspect of your life one day at a time.

Losing weight
Improving your looks - shaving head.
Learning Game - reading.
Making money - finding a good job.

Get a life first, take control of your body in terms of what you can improve.

Then come back to chasing girls.

You are barely 31 - your entire life is ahead of you. You can improve on every front still. What are you going to lose? You are not 70 yet with zero options.

Well I already know game. I've been studying it religiously since I was 17. I've read every theory out there, and studied from a wide variety of different gurus. I did over 3000 cold approaches in every setting imaginable, from sidewalks to clubs, from bondage festivals to church.

I already shave my head.

I've had a well-paying job for the past year.

I'm a little bit chubby... but little enough that a light jacket makes it unnoticeable. I would like to be jacked, of course - who wouldn't? I do exercise. I climb mountains. Although in the past few months, I've been doing it less and less - I just don't see much of a point in doing ANYTHING anymore.

And I really don't think SMV is the primary problem. It's not that I can't get chicks to be interested in me. That was the issue in America, but over here, it's not. I'm a fucking ROCKSTAR over here. Random strangers walk up to me on the street to take selfies with me. Girls get butterflies just from me LOOKING at them. I'm not exaggerating.

SMV isn't the problem anymore. The problem is... umm.... well I don't know what it is. I can't CONNECT with them.
03-12-2017 09:06 AM
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Harami Offline
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Post: #454
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
@thegreenman
Can you show us how your top 10 approaches went out of the 3000? I could learn something from your misfortune..I mean experience.
(This post was last modified: 03-12-2017 09:13 AM by Harami.)
03-12-2017 09:12 AM
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Zelcorpion Offline
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Post: #455
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
Your issues are more psychological in nature. You connect with some girls by having a joint family. Find one who likes to hike and loves nature - one that you love to smell (strong sexual chemistry that way). That is enough. Chinese girls open up with time - it is different to European ones.

It is as Gavin McInnes once said about the few hot feminists out there - fuck them, have kids with them and a live - you have plenty of topics to talk about not involving politics or feminism at all. You can even work living with such women.

It is now mostly in your head - there is no easy way overcoming that.
03-12-2017 09:20 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #456
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
Here's a piece of insight I've noticed, which maybe I haven't shared yet.

In the natural human condition, to put it bluntly, children witness their parents having sex. Before we lived in suburban houses, the whole family lived in a one-room hut or cottage, and children witnessed sex all the time. Even in modern houses, children see their parents having sex SOMETIMES.

But it my house, I never saw my parents have sex. I never saw them intimate with each other. I never found condoms or lingerie or sex toys in their bedroom (despite searching). I never even saw them embrace each other in a genuine way.

I didn't see any relatives, or friends doing it. Even in college, I happened to get roommates with no sex lives.

It was like the whole universe conspired to prevent my virgin eyes from seeing anything sexual - or even sensual.

I have a friend from back home, who was in a similar situation as me - very very frustrated in sexuality. He did manage to get a few girlfriends in highschool, but they were shallow and short-lived relationships. In college and after, he managed to get an occasional fuck, and an occasional brief girlfriend for a month or so. He did better than I did... but still, very little, and he was very frustrated. He was my main companion in The Quest for Vagina.

And a few years ago, he happened to meet a player. A guy who's had sex with at a number of girls somewhere in the 100's. This player got a job at his company, and they worked together, valeting cars. This player was a total fuckup in every area of life, except girls. And the two of them started hanging out together.

Once they started hanging out, my friend's success with girls shot up like a rocket. He started getting a lot more dates, which turned into girlfriends, and relationships, and now he's with a long-termer that he might even marry. And it all started when he began hanging out with this player dude.

Because he's a fellow game-reader, he was astute enough to make the causal connection on his own. He told me "you need to find an alpha and be friends with him." Easier said than done of course. I can't even remember the last time I met an actual player, in person (not on the internet), other than the one my friend hung out with, who, shortly after bestowing his gifts upon my friend, went into coke-rehab and disappeared off the map.

There is a MAP of sexuality that's missing from my mind. Most people get it by witnessing it. It's like an apostolic succession.

Maybe that's the problem. I dunno. It's a guess.
03-12-2017 09:27 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #457
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
(03-12-2017 09:12 AM)Harami Wrote:  @thegreenman
Can you show us how your top 10 approaches went out of the 3000? I could learn something from your misfortune..I mean experience.

Well it's hard to pick a top 10 out of 3000, especially since it was years ago. And there really wasn't much of a pattern, either. It was all over the map. I tried so many different strategies and types of approaches that I can't really boil it down to any specific type of game.

One that does come to mind, though, is the chick from the Bedouin tent in Israel. (it's in my wall-of-text OP). That's probably the one I'm most proud of, and it felt the most NATURAL. I just walked up to her and stared into her eyes without saying a word. It was primal. And electrifying. All other approaches involved some amount of game, indirect and/or canned or rehearsed... but that one was pure instinct, and it flowed.

Another one I feel like bragging about is when I approached an absolute 10/10 (no, like 100/10) on the sidewalk in Montreal while she was doing a modelling shoot. I waited for the cameraman to take a break, and then approached her and talked. She was friendly, surprisingly. But when I asked for her number, she laughed, and so did her crew. That's the kind of thing that boosts my ego, having the courage to do something like that. But it's ultimately fruitless. It didn't get me anywhere.

Those types of crazy scary approaches... in fact, most cold approaches, but especially those crazy ones... I didn't think they were actually going to work, when I did them. I usually did them to show off to my pickup-buddies. Or to myself. I went into those approaches with almost zero confidence that it would lead anywhere. And in the absence of that confidence, I used the next best thing: the desire to impress other guys, and/or the desire to prove to myself that I was unafraid. In the case of the Montreal model, I was alone, and there was no one to impress, so I did it to prove to myself that I could. That I wasn't too nervous. That the fear of social ridicule was not enough to stop me from pursuing my dreams and goals. My philosophy was "A rising tide of courage lifts all boats." If I conquered fears, one by one, then eventually all of that fear-conquering would produce SOME kind of reward. Even if the connection between the fear and the goal wasn't entirely clear, just the fact that it was a fear, and the fact that I was moving forward into that fear and conquering it, I figured would raise my sexuality boat the way overall economic prosperity lifts even the poorest members of society up, according to conservative economic theories. So the scarier the approach, the more psyched I was about doing it.

But I usually didn't think it would actually lead anywhere. And I was right.
(This post was last modified: 03-12-2017 09:55 AM by thegreenman.)
03-12-2017 09:42 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #458
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
(03-12-2017 08:42 AM)TTQQTT Wrote:  
(03-10-2017 12:05 PM)thegreenman Wrote:  I find it truly inconceivable that any guy can be happy without some kind of "feminine presence" in his life. As far as I know, we are yang and they are yin - we are complimentary opposites that are fundamentally, metaphysically interdependent on one another, since the Dawn of Creation. For a yang to exist in completion without a yin is like asking for a magnet with only one pole, or an atom with only protons. It's physically impossible, at the level of the most basic building blocks of the universe.

Now I'm open to being wrong about that. I'm always open to questioning my beliefs, and, if they're shown to be wrong, letting go of them and welcoming new ones. If it's not true, I don't want to believe it. But everything I've ever seen and every moment in this life I've ever experienced have shown me that it IS true.

It hurts. EXISTING hurts. It's like one of the science-fiction movies where the monster says "it hurts to exist, put me out of my misery", and the poor thing's very existence is inextricably made out of suffering. But there's ONE difference between that situation and mine: ONE thing that alleviates the pain. GIRLS.

They do more than alleviate it. They spontaneously transform it into pleasure. Sweetness. All they have to do is be near me. To talk to me. To allow me to bask in the radiant glow of their femininity. And the pain of mere existence is transformed into pleasure. I LOVE being alive on this Earth.

And then they keep walking, and the glow recedes, and I'm back to suffering again.

Every moment of every day hurts. Every moment is a struggle to suppress or ignore or "deal with" the pain enough to function. Every moment of every day, I want to crawl back in bed and go to sleep, and not be conscious, so that the pain of existing will not be there. Every time I've ever smiled, it was fake, because I was in pain underneath. Every approach. Every time I went hiking. Every beautiful sunset I've ever viewed. All were made possible by a suppression/compartmentalization of the pain of sexual isolation. In every one of those moments, I was compartmentalizing it, but just barely. Enough to function without people noticing. Or without them noticing *too much.*

Except when I was near girls.

I don't know if this will help(more so coming from a 20 years old guy), but have you read The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus? You can be happy with absolutely nothing. Just the simple fact that you exist is a win, so keep trying... but you shouldn't put your happiness on something other than yourself.

I haven't read that myth. I'll check it out. Thanks.

But man... I've heard the "you can and should be happy all on your own" thing so many times... and I've even tried it... but it's just so fantastical to me. It's like the opposite end of reality. I can't conceive of it. Every time I try, I get MORE unhappy. It's like a have to bury a part of myself in order to tell myself the lie that it's possible, and then I just come out the other end feeling even drier, stiffer, and more repressed than before.
03-12-2017 10:04 AM
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Turnus Offline
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Post: #459
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
Uhm, I never witnessed my parents having sex, nor have I've heard of others witnessing the same. Sure, love, affection, touch, etc. But I don't think one needs to witness it as a youth to have a normalized sexual life as an adult.
03-12-2017 11:52 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #460
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
(03-12-2017 11:52 AM)Turnus Wrote:  Uhm, I never witnessed my parents having sex, nor have I've heard of others witnessing the same. Sure, love, affection, touch, etc. But I don't think one needs to witness it as a youth to have a normalized sexual life as an adult.

Yea but you must have witnessed SOMETHING in the realm of sensuality or sexuality or intimacy. Not necessarily in your parents, but in SOMEBODY. You must have overheard a neighbor, or been with a friend who had a girlfriend while they were holding each other close.... something.

I seem to have been raised in a completely sterilized environment.
03-12-2017 03:14 PM
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ms224 Offline
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Post: #461
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
At the risk of pulling the pin on a handgrenade, cold approach is probably the worst way to meet people.

Think about it, why would someone want to be your friend from nowhere?

You said you like to climb and be outdoorsy?

Do some ironman's, join a climbing gym (pretty sure there aren't any fat people there) or something of the sort.

As far as slaying dragoons go, life isn't fair, but sometimes maybe its not fair in your favor.

What's your other option? Quit?

ETA Post #300!
(This post was last modified: 03-12-2017 04:58 PM by ms224.)
03-12-2017 04:55 PM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #462
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
Ok guys, I had a major realization last night. This might seem a little "out there", but bear with me. My logic is airtight. (And if it's not airtight, feel free to point out any flaws you see).

Here we go:

1. I am entirely capable of having sex. I am capable of finding women who want to have sex, and having sex with them. This ability is within the range of abilities that I possess.

2. If #1 is true, and the problem is not a lack of capability, then the fact that I haven't done so must be because of some force in opposition. Something is stopping me. An "equal and opposite force" is being applied from the other direction. I'm being cockblocked, essentially.

3. If the force described in #2 were just an accident, a result of natural forces, then I would have been able to overcome it, quite easily. If the web restraining me were an accident, then I would have been able to untangle myself from it, looooooong ago. I'm really smart. I would have figured it out. Therefore, it must have been woven by some kind of intelligence. Some*ONE* is behind this.

4. One theory is that the "someone" is me. But this breaks down under scrutiny. The main question is WHY - WHY would I do this to myself? I do understand that *short-term* frustrations can be valuable learning experiences. I understand that sometimes, adversity has to be presented, in order for growth to take place. This makes sense if I was involuntarily celibate for like... a few months. Maybe a year, TOPS. But anything more than that is just cruel, and not just cruel, but redundant. Whatever the lesson is or was, if I haven't learned it yet, then obviously the method of "total self-denial" isn't WORKING. Take whatever life-lesson or experience I was supposed to get from involuntary celibacy, and compare it against all of the learning experiences that I MISSED OUT ON by not even having a fucking FOOT in the realm of intimacy for SIXTEEN FUCKING YEARS - all the relationships I missed, all the sex I missed, all those boring, totally uneventful nights spent just sitting alone by myself staring at a blank wall, all of those short, shallow conversations I had with girls instead of deep, meaningful, emotion-filled relationships.... clearly I learned LESS about life, and experienced far less growth and opportunities for development as a result of this terrible strategy. So, identifying myself as the intentional long-term cockblocker is logically untenable. It wasn't me.

5. So who the fuck was it? It could have been my parents, or someone in my family. But I've been away from them for years now. They haven't had the ability to control me in a long time - yet, my problem has not been fixed. In some ways, it's even getting worse. I don't feel any closer to freedom. My parents couldn't be responsible for all of this. No human being could.

6. Therefore, the entity responsible must not be human. So we're basically dealing with a demon.

The way my life has been set up PERFECTLY to deny me sex or any form of relationship... the way events just seem to fall into place perfectly, all the time, to prevent female connections from happening... there's clearly an intelligence behind this.

I'll be walking down the street with a buddy, and I'll look over at something interesting, and then my buddy will say "hey, that girl was checking you out!" and I'll be like, "what girl?" And he'll be like "you didn't see her?" No, I was looking at that...

It all happens perfectly.

One time, I had a date set up with a girl from OKCupid, who seemed to really be enthusiastic about seeing me. On the day we were supposed to meet, her car broke down. Another time, a girl's phone fell into a lake and she couldn't call me. I actually investigated these instances a bit, and I really don't think they were bullshitting. This type of thing has happened SO many times. Once or twice, and it could be just coincidence... but we're talking every single time. Every single day.

And as a result of sexual isolation, I fall into a porn habit. A habit that just happens to produce tons of sexual energy, in a vacuum, with no partner to receive it... a perfect recipe for a demon to absorb that energy.

Last night, I went for a walk, and realized all of this. I then prayed, and asked God to tell me the name of the demon involved. I closed my eyes, concentrated on my mind's eye, and saw the name "Asmodeus." I was like, uh, really? It's that simple? Can't be. So I tried again and again, and kept getting that same name.

When I got home, I googled Asmodeus. To my shock, he's the official demon of Lust - the one responsible for twisting sexuality. Shit.

I knew nothing about this dude before last night. I had heard the name before, but knew no details about him. All I knew was that he was in D&D, but never encountered him when I played that game back in the day. Seriously, what skeptical explanation can there be for this?
03-13-2017 08:59 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #463
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
So, I asked God to neutralize him for me, to remove him from any sort of influence over me - immediately, completely, and permanently, and without any reservation. Immediately I felt like a burden lifted off my shoulders, and a bunch of noise in my head stopped.

We'll see what happens.
03-13-2017 09:14 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #464
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
That was last night, and just now, about an hour ago, a girl who I really liked, whom I'd written off as not interested, messaged me to go hiking!
03-13-2017 09:16 AM
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Post: #465
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
You have to stop giving a shit. Do it for your own amusement.

Its weird, but ive found that game works most when you treat it like a "game." Duh. Like a fun game, you know. Yeah, you want to win, but its not the end of the world if you lose. Life goes on. No regrets cause you had fun.
03-13-2017 09:50 AM
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Zelcorpion Offline
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Post: #466
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
Sorry Greenman, but there is no demon working against you.

You were simply born with a normally strong desire for women while having many handicaps - short stature, not overly good looks, slight autistic damage (if I am not mistaken - don't know if that applies to you), overbearing negative Jewish mother etc.. In addition you have talked with many very hot girls which probably gave you more delusions than assessments of reality.

You should have attempted to bang less attractive fatter girls and then moved from there.

Also you absolutely need to maximize your SMV points - meaning truly squeeze out of your SMV as much as possible:

+ bulk up
+ get ripped - simply get on a calorie restriction diet
+ get tanned
+ get yourself some shoes which raise your height - Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise wear those all the time, so why shouldn't you?
+ make money - activate your Jewish privilege even if you hate it
+ even get a tattoo

When you have maxed out all those things, then you will feel much better about yourself and have a different perception about women since your SMV has been raised. Especially if you concentrate about money you can get a lot of added value, but I wouldn't discount a six-pack with muscles either.

Some of the advice is usually overkill or not necessary for most men, but since you desire female attraction so much while being the way you are - then I am afraid that you have to put in the time. More approaches contrary to most men are not necessary in your case.

Consider your life a project or a real-life game - with the above mentioned points tasks that need to achieved befor you meet the next boss-level.
(This post was last modified: 03-13-2017 10:52 AM by Zelcorpion.)
03-13-2017 10:50 AM
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Post: #467
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
^ Zel, do you think improving on the points above will help him even if he's chasing girls with the mindset he described on the last page?

After the posts on the previous page, I get the feeling GM is so thirsty and desperate for a girl - well, a human, loving connection through a girl, really - that I'm not sure any of those external factors would improve his condition.

I'd address those psychological issues first, because 1. that vibe is repellent to (healthy, stable) people, which just compounds to the sufferable hand he's been dealt; 2. if he does find a girl he'll end up in another "soulmate" situation like with the Russian chick or worse because of his naive intention; and 3, because he'll invariably go back to being miserable as soon as something bad happens.

You can't build a great building on a weak foundation.

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03-13-2017 11:20 AM
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Post: #468
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
Psychological issues would be more important, but are difficult to address.

Self-improvement focuses on yourself instead of directly on girls - cutting body-fat down to 9%, lifting, making money - those are things which help in the areas of male achievement. Targeting those things make you feel better about yourself.

He has no trouble talking to girls, but has just bad perceptions about them and there is too much frustration going on.

Also I would add a strict - NO FAP and NO PORN REGIME. That helps with achievement of the other issues as well.
(This post was last modified: 03-13-2017 11:27 AM by Zelcorpion.)
03-13-2017 11:26 AM
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Post: #469
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
(Spoiler Alert!)
Greenman for reason reminds me of this movie about a PoW. Who didn't know what to do with his life after the war ended. He couldn't live his life normally again. All he could think about was how he was mistreated by this Japanese officer. For years, as a prisoner. Beaten, Starved. He was depressed and couldn't emotionally reconnect with his family. Near the end, he decides that he will kill that man even if he has go to jail for it. He finds out his whereabouts in a newspaper clip. Now he aboards a train to Vietnam. He finds that man working at a war museum and he confronts him. At gun point (knife actually), he interviews him in the same manner he did (he was an interpreter for him at that time). Long story short, he realizes that the officer was JUST A BISH / pussie at that time and he decides not to kill him, but FORGIVE him, They even became friends, they cry together (well, like men ofcourse) He realized it was the war that caused them their differences.

The movie is "The Railway Man".

Forgive those 3000 ( how did you keep count?) girls that turned you down, don't hold a decade long grudge. Let this thread die. Nobody has the exact, accurate, pinpoint, precise, hit the nail on the head answer that you want so badly as to why game didn't work for you specifically. Find your Vietnam and get laid.

Just Saying.
-WIA ..magod what just happened
No I mean Harami Blush
(This post was last modified: 03-13-2017 12:45 PM by Harami.)
03-13-2017 11:50 AM
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thegreenman Offline
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Post: #470
RE: Why Hasn't Game Worked?
I just had a VERY interesting night.

After a rather long time without doing any night-game (or much gaming in general), I decided to go out for an honest-to-goodness club pickup. Just like old times.

I picked the best club I could think of in the city, one with a bouncing dance floor. I went with an open mind, and no specific expectations, except to learn, experience, and scrub some of the rust off my game.

I went all in, partaking of the leafy sacrament upstairs, and then hitting the dance floor in my best condition. But on the way there, on the staircase, I came across two girls, at least one of whom gave me a particularly intense, direct, playful staredown. Her "look" was that of a "club chick", the kind that goes to clubs a lot, and really gets into it. Midriff showing - very rare in conservative western China. I made a mental note to talk to her at some point.

I get to the dance floor, and within a minute, that same girl shows up right next to me, with her friend, also very attractive, and they start dancing right next to me, making repeated eye contact with me and smiling a naughty smile my way.

Whereas in times past, I would have thought "ok, how do I make this happen?", tonight, I had a different thought - "Let this happen." Very different attitude. Having recently exorcised a literal demon (those things are real) that had been following me around for probably my whole life, I realized that with that dude gone, the thing that was stopping me wasn't there anymore. In other words, it wasn't that I "didn't know how" to get girls - I always knew how, but there was something stopping me, and now, with that thing gone, there was no need to figure how how to make it happen, because it happens on its own, naturally. So I just let it.

And it did. Flirty glances, a little bit of showing off, good spirits, and allowing (there's that key word - allowing) the girls to get closer to me, within a minute I was in a circle with them. Me, the midriff girl, and her friend. Then a third girl (a friend of theirs) joined in, and I was dancing with three girls, basically all focused on me.

I was like, whoa, this is cool.

Then the third girl left the circle, and a few dudes started to squeeze in to take her place. I returned to focusing on the first two girls: Midriff Girl and her friend.

I noticed that I was paying a lot of attention to Midriff Girl, and not much to her friend. I mean, midriffs are kind of enchanting. But I realized that I might be missing out on this other girl. She's actually pretty cute. Dressed conservatively in a black sweater. But very cute. I make it a point to divide my attention evenly between them, not picking and choosing.

Soon, the dynamic seems to shift toward the friend. Let's call her Potential Girlfriend-material Girl. PGmG for short.

Within a few more minutes, we're making simple kino (high fives, hand-holding when everyone formed into a ring-dance, a brief hand on her shoulder after accidently bumping into her a bit), and she's not backing away. Her face is lit up, radiant, happy.

I've done a lot of game in my day (as those of you who read my 3000-approach thread know quite well), and I remember very very few times when I did this well in a night-game setting, so quickly, so smoothly, so flawlessly, and so effortlessly. This was like a reawakening of reality for me. I kept repeating, "let it happen, let it happen" in my mind.

For one song, we hold both hands, raising them above our heads, pressing palms together, doing a twirl, and she's having a blast. Her friends even seem to be trying to set her up. I got the impression that she had maybe been down on her luck in the love department recently, and her friends were hoping for her to find another guy, to stop being single. I don't know whether that's true - it's just the sort of vibe I got from the situation, because her friends were being unusually supportive of getting her together with me. They were kind of cheering it on, vibe-wise.

After that song ended, I was thirsty, so I told her I was gonna go get water. I attempted to ask her if she wanted anything from the bar (in my still very rudimentary Mandarin), and the communication barrier led to a brief chat where we were trying to figure out what each other was saying. Eventually I made a pantomime of drinking water, and pointed to the bar, and went to get a drink. I got water (my favorite). I thought about getting her a water, but realized it could be creepy to pressure a girl to drink from an open glass (roofies and such), so I decided to just get one for myself. Then I made my way back over to where we were.

They weren't there. I thought that was kind of odd. I was gone for maybe... 3 minutes? 4 minutes tops. I waited, sipping my water. Eventually PGmG came back. Same smile, same enthusiasm - but she was with a dude this time. Two of them. Two of the same ones that had been trying to get into the original dance circle from before. Now I could tell they were definitely batting for the other team. In fact, during the dance circle, they had been oddly more focused on me than on the girls. That's an annoying thing that tends to happen a lot when I do dance-floor game.

So anyway, the four of us are now talking. Me, PGmG, and her two probably-gay friends. I make sure to avoid being rude to the dudes, to include them in the conversation in a polite way, while continuing to chat mainly with PGmG. I have what small conversation I can have with her, given the language issue. I figure out where she's from - she's a tourist here (I live in a major tourist town), and is going to be in town for 2 more days. I ask her if she's been up the mountain yet (there's a big snow-capped mountain that dominates the topography, which many people come here to see). She says she hasn't. I'm shocked. I tell her she mustn't leave without going there, and I offer to show it to her. I ask for her Wechat.

When I ask for her Wechat, the two gay dudes start to go bonkers. They start saying "wei xin! [Chinese for Wechat] Wei xin!" while laughing to themselves as if my request was crazy and hilarious. They put their arms around PGmG, saying something to her in Chinese (probably "why would you give him your Wechat? Don't be silly!") or something along those lines.

But the girl is remaining stalwart. She's not giving in to their shenanigans. I can tell she's under pressure, and feels very shy about the whole thing... but she's not walking away. She's staying there, continuing to face me, continuing to talk to me, even though she's blushing more and more. Finally I man up and look directly at her and say "Wechat". She gets out her phone, and we exchange information.

It was implied that they were all getting ready to leave, so I assumed the interaction was over. I made my way off the dance floor, and ran into Midriff Girl sitting at a table with several other people. She waved to me and smiled and big smile, so I went over and talked to her. Learned her name, learned a few more things about her and her friends. I sat down, and met the girl sitting next to her... let's call her Librarian Girl. She had a librarianny and slightly kinkyish and also slightly tomboyish vibe. Her English was the best of the whole crowd. I got into a conversation with her, learning yet more about the group.

I must emphasize that they were all welcoming and inviting, and that this all flowed easily, with approval and enthusiasm from all of them. I was not acting like some aspie oblivious to social cues. They were inviting me, offering me food, pouring beer for me, holding up their cups to gan bei (cheers) me, and so forth.

So while conversing with Librarian Girl, Midriff Girl gets up and goes somewhere, and their friend - the one who had been in the dance circle earlier, the third girl when I was dancing with three - she shows up, and she's the most drunk of them all. She does some... what's the word.. ho-ey? Slutty gestures/moves? Like she caressed me while moaning, briefly. The kind a working-girl does when she's trying to entice you. I found it a bit weird. Too soon. Too drunk. No context. Just wasn't into this. But I asked her her name, and introduced myself. Just being friendly to everyone in the social circle.

PGmG (Potential Girlfriend-material Girl) comes back to the table, taps me on the shoulder, and says she's going to the dance floor, and that that's where I can find her. She goes off. I chat with Librarian Girl and Call-girl-like Girl for another minute or so. The conversation lulls, so I get up and tell them I'm going to the dance floor. I invite them to come along. They say no, they're staying at the table, and Call-girl-like Girl tells me to go - go to the dance floor. Adding to my sense that the whole group is trying to set me and PGmG up together.

Now here's where it got weird.

I go to the dance floor. They're not there. I wander around a bit. I find PGmG at a table with the two gay dudes, drinking. I see them, and say hey. Something's weird - they're not being so friendly this time. I gan bei (cheers) them, and after that, one of the gay dudes starts saying/shouting something at PGmG. They start arguing (I have no idea what they're saying), and after a few moments, gay dude drags her off. He literally grabs her by the arm, and pulls her away from the table. He walks very quickly, dragging her with quite a bit of force it seems, back to their table.

I follow them back, and when I get there, PGmG is laying down next to Librarian Girl, and she's got a jacket or something covering up her body, and I can't see her face. I sit down next to her, and ask her what happened back there - why did he drag you like that? Is everything alright? She looks very embarrassed, blushing a lot, and won't answer. I ask Libarian Girl what's going on. She doesn't really respond. I get out my phone and start typing something into Translate, but before I finish, one of the club staff comes over to me, taps me on the shoulder, and beckons me to get up and leave.

I ask him why. He makes the "leave" gesture again. I type in Translate "what happened?" He types back "They don't like you."

I type in "Actually, she likes me, but I think her gay friends are jealous." He laughs, and shakes his head, as if to say "Hey, I was asked to get you to leave, I don't know what happened, I'm just doing my job, I don't know anything about this situation, sorry."

I go back over to the dance floor, but decide I need some fresh air, so I go back outside for a bit. I sit and think about what just happened.

I have some VERY interesting ideas about what happened.

But before I get to the analysis, let's finish up the story. Eventually I go back inside. I go to the bathroom. The men's room is being mopped, so the staff is directing men into the women's bathroom. There's a bit of a line to use the stalls, so I stand in line. While I'm standing there, Librarian Girl comes in. She walks right in front of me, without saying anything, and stands in the line for the stall next to mine. I say hey. She says hey, curtly. I ask her "what happened back there?" All she says is, "...yea."

I ask her if I did something wrong. I ask her if she, or anyone in the group, is mad at me. I ask her again, if I did anything wrong. She won't say a word. Just stands there with her arms crossed, looking away from me.

On my way out of the club, I see the gay dudes drinking at a table. I go over and ask them "what happened?" They're hostile towards me. I open Translate, switch it to CN-EN, and ask one of the dudes to type in an answer. He types: "They don't like you."

I know I have PGmG's Wechat. I don't need these weirdos anymore - I can just message her directly. I say ok, shake their hands, and wish them a good night.

Whew...

So... what happened?

Here's my hypothesis.

The gay dudes were jealous, and tried to sabotage the budding relationship. But it's more than that.

Gay dudes are an issue whenever I do dance-floor game. They always try to get in between me and whatever girl I'm focused on. It's a persistent annoyance, and I'm not sure how to stop it. I can't be outright rude to them - it looks really bad. What I usually end up doing is just ignoring them, and continuing to focus on the girl.

I think it's my size. I'm 5'2". To be blunt, I think they think I'd make a good... uh... whatever term they use for such things. It's quite disturbing to think about, but we're all grownups here. Forget about pride - I want to understand what's going on.

So I think what we've got going on here is a conspiracy.

It's a conspiracy, by queers, to sabotage heterosexual relationships, in order to frustrate people, thus creating more queers, and more potential partners for them.

It's a... consqueeracy.

Guys, what if... What if this whole cultural shitstorm we've had going on for the past several decades was a massive, coordinated effort by queers to engineer more queers? I mean, what if they infiltrated government and media and everything, in order to deliberately screw up heterosexual relationships, to sabotage us, to prevent us from being satisfied (or in tonight's case, prevent our relationships from even forming in the first place) - all so that we'd eventually give up, go over to the "dark side", give queerness a shot, and broaden their pool of potential partners?

Librarian Girl definitely had something queer going on with her. She, I feel, was batting for that team. And after her cold-shoulder treatment at the end, it's obvious that she took part in the conspiracy, however it unfolded.

In contrast, Midriff Girl was clearly very heterosexual, and she seemed to be trying to bring me and PGmG together, to set us up with each other.

And then of course, PGmG herself was into me, very engaged, and very happy when she was talking to me.

Everyone in the group who was normal was pro, and all the queers were anti.

Wow.

This is really weird. Has anyone ever thought about this kinda stuff before?


TLDR: I got back into club game, had a really smooth, effortless connection with a girl on the dance floor, felt like a sexy awesome beast, and was then sabotaged by some queers, and now I'm wondering if there's a wider "consqueeracy."
(This post was last modified: 03-18-2017 05:31 AM by thegreenman.)
03-18-2017 05:26 AM
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