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Dealing with the death of your pets
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porscheguy Offline
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Post: #26
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(03-25-2018 01:48 PM)Ski pro Wrote:  For those of you that has had to put a dog down.

The wisdom says when it’s time you will know but I struggle to see when one would see this.

How did you know it was time?
I’ve just about mastered the art of knowing when it’s time.
1. The animal is old. If they’ve exceeded the average life expectancy and at the high limit, you know they’re old.
2. Their hygiene falters.
3. They’re no longer themself, or a shell of what they were.
4. They piss/shit everywhere when they previously didn’t.
5. When dealing with the animal reduces your quality of life, and yet your actions do not improve the quality of the animal’s life.

I had a black lab I got as a puppy. He lived a charmed life on a farm with river access and a swimming pool. He went through a bout of heart worms which slowed him considerably, and he eventually decided he was going to be an inside dog. Not a problem. He did this for the last few years. He’d go out side to shit/piss. He reached 13. Congestive heart failure set in along with incontinence. I remembered the dog in his youth when he would jump off the end of the pier into the river. Those days were long past. He slowed down A LOT. I was moving to a new house and I was not going to have him pissing and shitting on the floor. He sometimes shit himself while asleep. I had him put down on the day I moved. He was old, diminished quality of life, and I wasn’t going to let an animal ruin my new house, pissing and shitting everywhere. He was not going to get better.

I had another dog who was 13/14 years old. She had 4-5 seizures over the course of a weekend. The final seizure was particularly bad. When she finally came around, you could see the lights were on, but no one was home. The other dogs stayed away from her because they knew something wasn’t right. She sat and barked at the wall all night. At 7AM I called the vet and told him I was bringing the dog to be put down. The dog was old. She clearly suffered a permanent brain injury from a stroke. There was no treatment. No bringing her back. I wasn’t t going to spend the money to diagnose a problem that couldn’t be fixed. I couldn’t be kept up at night by a dog barking at the wall in confusion.

I’ve done this several times and it always follows the same pattern. Old animal, no quality of life, no chance of improvement. Once you can see and accept it, it’s not a difficult call to make. You know you did right when any feelings of guilt are alleviated with a feeling of relief.
03-25-2018 02:35 PM
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Repo Offline
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Post: #27
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(07-04-2014 04:23 PM)Cheetah Wrote:  Console yourself with a girl and let her console you for the loss, then get her instead of the pet.

Nah dogs are loyal, these hoes aren't.
03-25-2018 02:44 PM
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godfather dust Away
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Post: #28
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(03-25-2018 02:44 PM)Repo Wrote:  
(07-04-2014 04:23 PM)Cheetah Wrote:  Console yourself with a girl and let her console you for the loss, then get her instead of the pet.

Nah dogs are loyal, these hoes aren't.

Yeah if I ever have a girl make an ultimatum "me or the dog" I'll tell her to suck my (and the dog's) dick.
03-25-2018 03:00 PM
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ed pluribus unum Offline
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Post: #29
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(03-25-2018 02:35 PM)porscheguy Wrote:  I’ve done this several times and it always follows the same pattern. Old animal, no quality of life, no chance of improvement. Once you can see and accept it, it’s not a difficult call to make. You know you did right when any feelings of guilt are alleviated with a feeling of relief.

Amen. Not a question of putting them down when it becomes inconvenient for you; you owe them something for the years of comfort and pleasure they have given you. But when they no longer can enjoy their final days, it's time to say goodnight.

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03-25-2018 08:44 PM
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
A few years back, a friend of mine told me that this one funeral home offered therapy services for grieving cat/dog owners. They would often bring out a cat or dog to comfort you... one that looked exactly like your deceased pet. Orange fluffy ginger cat? Here, meet Tigger. White/black cat with socks? Here, meet Felix. They needed homes. He said that 9 out of 10 times, they would adopt them and it eased their pain tremendously. No buyer's remorse.

When my cat's time to go to her Creator comes around, I plan on an epic, soul-enriching trip. When I come back, I'll adopt. That's what my best bud would want: for me to have the best time in my life banging hot chicks in Lima and not wallowing in depression and deep grief and alcohol for months on end.
(This post was last modified: 03-25-2018 10:40 PM by Soothesayer.)
03-25-2018 10:33 PM
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Post: #31
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
While an animal will always soldier on to its last gasp no matter how old, debilitated or helpless it becomes - it is literally the only thing it knows in life - once it gets to that point it is time to let go. Humans with their vast internal workings are capable of maintaining a happy existence despite being disabled in one way or another, but for an animal going through that sort of suffering turns everything in its life into a hopeless, painful struggle. It's not something that you'd want to see a pet that you love go through.

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03-26-2018 05:19 AM
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Ski pro Offline
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Post: #32
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
I need some advice gents. Vet appointment tomorrow am.

My faithful hound is very old, 15.5 and has even diagnosed with advanced kidney failure. Also has back problems that now can’t treated because his kidneys won’t cope with the drugs.

He hasnt really got up on is own for a week now and falls over constantly. Not eating unless it’s human food ( eating is what he lives for normally), Hardly drinking. His breath smells like death.

He doesn’t really do anything during the day as of course he can’t go anywhere without someone getting him up. When he does go out he pisses and shits ok. He can walk about 30meters before getting tired.

I had pretty much come to the decision that tomorrow is the day to have him PTS but tonight, spurred on by the food we were eating he got up and started moving around hunting for food.

Now I’m second guessing myself.

Logically what ie written says it’s time. But I don’t want to let him go too early if he still has some quality of life. He’s by my side literally for 13 years.

I would appreciate some perspective inputs. I think it’s me that can’t bear to let him go.

Ps. This is not helped by us going on holiday tomorrow but that would be 6 hours in te car with a sick dog.
(This post was last modified: 04-15-2018 01:54 PM by Ski pro.)
04-15-2018 01:53 PM
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Post: #33
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
I feel for you Ski Pro. I have been there. The crazy thing is when you make the decision mentally to end it they somehow perk up for a day. Friends of mine have told me the same thing about their dogs. It is a brutal decision but I believe those of us who love our dogs tend to wait too long. A food driven dog that is not eating right, 15.5 years old and with chronic health issues is probably more ready than you are. Easy for me to say half a world away, you are the one tasked with the job. I love my dogs and always have waited too long on this issue in retrospect.
04-15-2018 02:28 PM
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Post: #34
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(04-15-2018 01:53 PM)Ski pro Wrote:  I need some advice gents. Vet appointment tomorrow am.

My faithful hound is very old, 15.5 and has even diagnosed with advanced kidney failure. Also has back problems that now can’t treated because his kidneys won’t cope with the drugs.

He hasnt really got up on is own for a week now and falls over constantly. Not eating unless it’s human food ( eating is what he lives for normally), Hardly drinking. His breath smells like death.

He doesn’t really do anything during the day as of course he can’t go anywhere without someone getting him up. When he does go out he pisses and shits ok. He can walk about 30meters before getting tired.

I had pretty much come to the decision that tomorrow is the day to have him PTS but tonight, spurred on by the food we were eating he got up and started moving around hunting for food.

Now I’m second guessing myself.

Logically what ie written says it’s time. But I don’t want to let him go too early if he still has some quality of life. He’s by my side literally for 13 years.

I would appreciate some perspective inputs. I think it’s me that can’t bear to let him go.

Ps. This is not helped by us going on holiday tomorrow but that would be 6 hours in te car with a sick dog.

Dang, Bro. That's rough. I had to put down my mom's dawg when I was 20 years old. The dawg was 14 and had terrible cancer. So, yeah, that dog had been part of the family since I could remember. My mom just couldn't do it herself. But the dog was pitifully ill and horribly unhealthy. I just decided that I'd do it because my mom asked and I knew she wouldn't be capable.

I got up. Cooked a big meal of bacon for her. We went to a a quiet field and I played with her for a while, said my goodbyes. Then we went to the vet's office and I held her in my arms while she died.

It's fucking painful. I won't lie. I'm sure you'll make the right decision.

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04-15-2018 03:01 PM
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Post: #35
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(04-15-2018 01:53 PM)Ski pro Wrote:  I need some advice gents. Vet appointment tomorrow am.

He doesn’t really do anything during the day as of course he can’t go anywhere without someone getting him up. When he does go out he pisses and shits ok. He can walk about 30meters before getting tired.

I had pretty much come to the decision that tomorrow is the day to have him PTS but tonight, spurred on by the food we were eating he got up and started moving around hunting for food.

Now I’m second guessing myself.

Logically what ie written says it’s time. But I don’t want to let him go too early if he still has some quality of life.
That always happens. You make the decision to end it, and all of a sudden, they seem to spontaneously recover.

The decision is yours and yours alone. I’ve already said all I can say on the subject. It’s on you to make the honest assessment and decide how to proceed.
04-15-2018 04:10 PM
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Post: #36
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
Something to do in the meantime of deciding whether to get a new dog is to sit down and read "Old Yeller" (It is a quick read). See the movie too if you want, it is particularly good. Then think about the bond between a boy and his dog, as protrayed, and apply it to yourself and the bond between you, a man, and your dogs.
04-15-2018 04:27 PM
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Post: #37
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
I guess part of having a pet is that you will (hopefully) outlive it. Still not easy though. Gonna be a sad day when our family lab goes up to the great field in the sky
04-15-2018 09:17 PM
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Fortis Away
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Post: #38
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
There's a scene in a movie, Bone Tomahawk, where this man's horse gets wounded by raiders. He's obviously a bit choked up and upset that they kneecapped his horse and left her for the vultures. Knowing he can't save the horse, he walks over to it and says, "thank you for all your services" and mercy kills the horse with his revolver.

I always respected the dignified way he sent his horse off. I think that's what we should strive to remember our pets when they pass. While a dog is not a beast of burden like a horse, they do provide some service to us in the form of unflinching loyalty and love. Quietly thank your animals in your head and do your best to let it go.

I've seen many pets pass in my life and it's never comfortable but you learn to just let it go.

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04-15-2018 09:44 PM
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Ski pro Offline
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Post: #39
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
Thanks all.

He was PTS this morning. We spent breakfast together and then went to the vet.

He was caught in the trap of kidney failure which meant no meds for his bad back, which meant he couldn't walk. Vicious cycle.

I was with him until the end. My hand on his heart as it stopped beating. I hope he's not in pain any more.

I'm gutted. He was my best friend but I couldn't bear to see him suffer anymore.
04-16-2018 02:56 PM
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
I have tears in my eyes as I write this. Death is such a terrible part of life, and being the one left behind seems unbearable. Dogs are especially hard, they have such dumb loyalty and don't know any better than to have undying love for you.

Losing a dog is one of the hardest things a boy can go through, and I thank my parents for setting us up to deal with the death of dogs, so when both my grandfathers passed away two Christmases in a row, I had some internal experience for dealing with loss.

Also, vets come to your house to put down animals. Its the least we could do for our animals to have them in their happy place for their final breaths.

Sorry for your loss. Focus all that longing on your beautiful little girl and be happy to have known such love as your loyal dog.
04-16-2018 03:15 PM
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Post: #41
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(04-16-2018 02:56 PM)Ski pro Wrote:  Thanks all.

He was PTS this morning. We spent breakfast together and then went to the vet.

He was caught in the trap of kidney failure which meant no meds for his bad back, which meant he couldn't walk. Vicious cycle.

I was with him until the end. My hand on his heart as it stopped beating. I hope he's not in pain any more.

I'm gutted. He was my best friend but I couldn't bear to see him suffer anymore.

This is a very painful thing to go through. My condolances. At least it sounds like you had a clear indication it was time. At a certain point, they are tired and it's time to let them rest. So often it's not clear, as it seemed for you in your OP. I sounds like you reached the point where you could be sure it was time.

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04-16-2018 09:25 PM
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
St. Francis of Assisi's Prayers for Pets

Saint Francis of Assisi, for Our Pets
Good St. Francis, you loved all of God's creatures. To you they were your brothers and sisters. Help us to follow your example of treating every living thing with kindness. St. Francis, Patron Saint of animals, watch over my pet and keep my companion safe and healthy. Amen.

Saint Francis of Assisi, for Sick Animals
Heavenly Father, you created all things for your glory and made us stewards of this creature If it is your will, restore it to health and strength. Blessed are you, Lord God, and holy is your name for ever and ever. Amen

Saint Francis of Assisi, for our Animal Friends
Heavenly Father, our human ties with our friends of other species is wonderful and special gift from You. We now ask You to grant our special animal companions your Fatherly care and healing power to take away any suffering they have. Give us, their human friends, new understanding of our responsibilities to these creatures of Yours. They have trust in us as we have in You; our souls and theirs are on this earth together to give one another friendship, affection, and caring. Take our heartfelt prayers and fill Your ill or suffering animals with healing Light and strength to overcome whatever weakness of body they have.

(Here mention the names of the animals needing prayer).

Your goodness is turned upon every living thing and Your grace flows to all Your creatures. From our souls to theirs goodness flows, touching each of us with the reflection of Your love. Grant to our special animal companions long and healthy lives. Give them good relationships with us, and if You see fit to take them from us, help us to understand that they are not gone from us, but only drawing closer to You. Grant our prayer through the intercession of good St. Francis of Assisi, who honored You through all Your creatures. Give him the power to watch over our animal friends until they are safely with You in eternity, where we someday hope to join them in giving You honor forever. Amen.

(You can make this a Novena for a sick pet, by praying this prayer for 9 consecutive days)

http://www.heavenlydivinecustomrosary.co...-pets.html
(This post was last modified: 04-16-2018 09:58 PM by Sombro.)
04-16-2018 09:56 PM
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Ski pro Offline
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Post: #43
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
Thank you for your kind messages.

Yesterday was a tough day for sure but today was easier and last night I was up at 3am thinking about him and able to start focusing on the good times we shared together.

Time will help me get over this for sure, I went over and over the decisions that I took over the last three days and I can't find a way in which I could have done it differently with a better outcome, so I know I've done the right thing by him.

Thanks again everyone for all your good advice. This forum is truly an exceptional place.
04-17-2018 02:21 PM
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Post: #44
RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
My condolences Ski pro. It's tough.

I put my last dog down when he was 15 and I was 27. So I had had him since I was 12. He was a Yorkshire terrier stray that my dad had found wondering the streets as a puppy. To cut a long story short he started having fits, kind of like epilepsy. Was horrific to see it happen and not know what to do to comfort him. I took him to the vet and they gave him tablets but said there was no cure as such and I should prepare for the end game. Anyway one night soon after I went out to a martial arts class and when I came home I found him in the middle of a fit. He was soaked in sweat and his eyes had this terrible fear in them I'll never forget as his body writhed around in and uncontrolled thrashing, his tongue lolling around. I just held him and told him he'd be ok as he whimpered and fitted. Was traumatising to see.

Anyway I knew I could not let him go through that again as much as I loved him. I phoned the emergency number of the vet as it was 11pm and said I needed to do put him down immediately. The vet agreed to meet me at the surgery. I had no car so carried my dog up to the vet to find the surgeon waiting. We went in and injected him. I was crying and saying my goodbyes as he fell asleep and his heart stopped beating. I then carried his body home. That night I lay him on the sofa and slept next to his body. In the morning his body was stiff and the room smelt of death. It was all somewhat traumatic to be honest, I think i was in some kind of PTSD or shock. I buried him that morning in the garden.

Afterwards I thought about why it had affected me so much, and this might be the same for others. It was not just the fact my buddy was dead but it was that he was also the last link to my childhood too. I had had him since I was 12 and so him dying kind of meant the final death of my adolescence. I could not talk about it for a long time afterwards.

Anyway my view is you have to do what is best for your dog in this situation. As much as it hurts it is unfair to prolong your pet's life if it is suffering. If it can't walk, needs meds to function, needs to be carried around and stuff then you have to ask yourself if it's fair to keep it going.
04-18-2018 04:28 AM
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Ski pro Offline
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
I thought I would update you all on this as a lot of the good advice in this thread said that time would help.

I got my dogs Ashes back yesterday so at least he's back home and now sits with me at my office every day. Bit weird I know.

Time has helped but I do still miss my dog. The thing I've noticed I miss the most is the routine. The time alone every day where we would just walk and more importantly, I would have some.time to think and get my thoughts in order. It's all been a bit chaotic since the dog has gone.

I must find a way to replace that time for clear thought but I don't want another dog for a while.
(This post was last modified: 06-23-2018 03:09 PM by Ski pro.)
06-23-2018 03:08 PM
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
Go hang out at a dog park. If anyone asks why you are there, just say that your dog died recently and that it's your way of coping. You might get some pity sex.
06-23-2018 03:39 PM
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
delete

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06-23-2018 03:45 PM
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
Our family dog was put down a few hours ago. He had a heart disease since 3 years and it seriously deteriorated the last few weeks, probably because of the heat wave. He had a heart cough and his breathing pattern became more frequent.

We went for his last walk one hour before the vet came to our home. He walked really slow, and at the end of the walk looked like he wanted to lie down, which he'd never done before during a walk. Afterwards he was panting hard and looked strained.

Me, my brother and my dad was with him when the vet came. We put him in his bed and petted him as the vet prepared the injections. My dog was never nervous or stressed.

First the vet him gave the sedative. It worked within a few minutes, and he slowly laid his head down. His breathing became very strained which was a little disconcerting, but the vet assured that by this point dogs are not conscious of what's going in. The heavy breathing was a result of the sedative affecting his already bad circulation.

I was stoic until the lethal injection. As my dog took his last breaths and disappeared, the tears just burst through. It was overwhelming to see him just go, and to realize that we had the power to end his life. I've never been there for my dogs at their last moments before, and it's impossible to know how you will react.

We said our goodbyes, I embraced my friend one last time and breathed deep to catch his scent. I hope I will remember it. Then we carried him in his bed to the vet's car.

For better or worse, we euthanized him just before he would've really suffered from his condition. He lived a good life and died calm and dignified, surrounded by his pack. That makes it a little less painful to bear, and I'm happy to have been with him in his last moments.

Some tough days will follow now, but the love our four-legged friends give us is worth every tear we shed for them.
(This post was last modified: 08-09-2018 02:12 PM by Vienna.)
08-09-2018 02:10 PM
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RE: Dealing with the death of your pets
(08-09-2018 02:10 PM)Vienna Wrote:  Our family dog was put down a few hours ago. He had a heart disease since 3 years and it seriously deteriorated the last few weeks, probably because of the heat wave. He had a heart cough and his breathing pattern became more frequent.

We went for his last walk one hour before the vet came to our home. He walked really slow, and at the end of the walk looked like he wanted to lie down, which he'd never done before during a walk. Afterwards he was panting hard and looked strained.

Me, my brother and my dad was with him when the vet came. We put him in his bed and petted him as the vet prepared the injections. My dog was never nervous or stressed.

First the vet him gave the sedative. It worked within a few minutes, and he slowly laid his head down. His breathing became very strained which was a little disconcerting, but the vet assured that by this point dogs are not conscious of what's going in. The heavy breathing was a result of the sedative affecting his already bad circulation.

I was stoic until the lethal injection. As my dog took his last breaths and disappeared, the tears just burst through. It was overwhelming to see him just go, and to realize that we had the power to end his life. I've never been there for my dogs at their last moments before, and it's impossible to know how you will react.

We said our goodbyes, I embraced my friend one last time and breathed deep to catch his scent. I hope I will remember it. Then we carried him in his bed to the vet's car.

For better or worse, we euthanized him just before he would've really suffered from his condition. He lived a good life and died calm and dignified, surrounded by his pack. That makes it a little less painful to bear, and I'm happy to have been with him in his last moments.

Some tough days will follow now, but the love our four-legged friends give us is worth every tear we shed for them.

Sorry for your loss man. there comes a moment that you all know, including the dog, that it's time.
08-10-2018 09:58 PM
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