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Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
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Jaffna Offline
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Post: #1
Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Seems like most young women in the American dating scene today are looking for a guy who fits her "type". The closer he conforms to her physical ideal, the closer he'll get to getting it in. The further he deviates, the less the likelihood of him ever building a sexual or romantic connection. In most cases, he'll never get beyond a first date under the pretense of "no chemistry".

I recently went out with a cute 25 year old small town blonde who seems to be an exception. She claims she doesn't have a "type", and wants "someone who shares the same values as me, is ambitious, has a sense of humor and is kind".

Assuming I get multiple dates, is it possible to win her over by building a romantic connection over time, even if I am not her physical ideal?
05-16-2015 02:46 PM
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Fortis Away
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Post: #2
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Uh, let me ask the obvious question here: you just met this chick and you're already trying to "win her over?" what's up wit dat?

I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
05-16-2015 03:06 PM
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Pontifex Maximus
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Post: #3
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
this doesn't even make sense. you just said she doesn't have a "type", but the stated intent of this thread is 'winning over' a girl when you aren't her type?

or is it that you don't have values, ambition, a sense of humor, or kindness?

verdict: banhammer impending.
05-16-2015 03:10 PM
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Porfirio Rubirosa Away
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RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Oneitis is a bitch mate and I think you're suffering it or at the very least want to suffer it. Bang loads of girls and after you feel emotionally 'empty' (whatever that means) get an LTR and continue banging loads of women on the side. Wink

Oh yes, I'm so privileged you literally can't even.
Interested in joining the FFL? I tried (and failed).
(This post was last modified: 05-16-2015 03:13 PM by Porfirio Rubirosa.)
05-16-2015 03:13 PM
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Pontifex Maximus Offline
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RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
May I ask how old you are?

You're approaching this with a powerless mentality. You need to have more confidence in what you can possess, not whether you fit her mold. If you a genuinely magnificent specimen of a man, she'll change her mold to accomodate you. Women don't know what they want, they just want what Kim Kardashian or the hottest girl in their social group have, so they move up their social ladder.

Just go for it. Romantic gestures shouldn't have to be built or forced. Leave that for wedding planners or Boyz II Men ghostwriters. Your last paragraph should have this mentality...

(05-16-2015 02:46 PM)Jaffna Wrote:  Assuming I get multiple dates, is it possible to win her over by building a romantic connection over time, even if I am not her physical ideal?

Since she's pleasurable enough to tolerate for multiple dates, I wouldn't mind being in a more relaxed, playful state. Even though I'm not built like Adonis yet, it doesn't matter. She's 25 and losing time fast anyway...
(This post was last modified: 05-16-2015 03:37 PM by Pontifex Maximus.)
05-16-2015 03:35 PM
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Libertas
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Post: #6
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
No.

Female desire is the culmination of a long-held fantasy. Going by the book A Billion Wicked Thoughts she has a detective agency in her head, screening every detail and every part of you to make sure you fit this fantasy and are "hawt." This detective agency literally feeds into her physiological arousal system and prevents her from getting wet for you if you don't meet its criteria.

Unless you want to spend all your time chasing uninterested girls, the best thing is to fit a commonly-held fantasy that girls have and then let them come to you. Tattooed rocker, brooding artist, buff frat boy, urbane guys in a suit, CEO, etc. When you fit a girl's fantasy she'll fuck you immediately with very little work on your part. http://therationalmale.com/2012/04/13/have-a-look/
(This post was last modified: 05-16-2015 03:56 PM by XII.)
05-16-2015 03:52 PM
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Jaffna Offline
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Post: #7
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
(05-16-2015 03:52 PM)XII Wrote:  No.

Female desire is the culmination of a long-held fantasy. Going by the book A Billion Wicked Thoughts she has a detective agency in her head, screening every detail and every part of you to make sure you fit this fantasy and are "hawt." This detective agency literally feeds into her physiological arousal system and prevents her from getting wet for you if you don't meet its criteria.

Unless you want to spend all your time chasing uninterested girls, the best thing is to fit a commonly-held fantasy that girls have and then let them come to you. Tattooed rocker, brooding artist, buff frat boy, CEO, etc. When you fit a girl's fantasy she'll fuck you immediately with very little work on your part.

So girls don't care about your personality, intelligence, wit, ambitions or character. They just want you to fit an archetype.
05-16-2015 03:53 PM
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Libertas Offline
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RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
^^A Billion Wicked Thoughts has been harshly criticized as pop-psy bullshit. Don't take that shit too seriously.

OP, stop worrying about her "type." Doing so will make you less daring and more caring.

Bottom line, girls don't know what they want. They are fickle as fuck. If you're not blown out immediately, assume you have a chance and work with what you can control - leadership, dominance, playfulness, etc. Obviously look as good as you can and try to have some interesting hobbies. Girls will change their mold to fit you if they're attracted to you. If they aren't, you'll find out one way or the other.

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05-16-2015 03:59 PM
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h3ltrsk3ltr Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
You're basically ceeding all the power to the woman. It's about what she wants, what she's looking for. Be a man and find the woman YOU want.

Women are the gatekeepers of sex, men are the gatekeepers of relationships. You have all the power.

This isn't a place to ask about getting this one special girl, this place is for developing yourself and getting what you want out of life as a man.

It does sometimes seem like you have to be their type,and maybe some girls want the knight in shiny white armor they've been fantasizing about since they were little, but not every girl is compatible with every guy. If you're running into objections like this from girls, don't just say "oh well, I'm not her type." Overcome the fucking objection.

You can do this because you know you're a high value man who rates high value pussy. If that's not true, make yourself high value. But do it for you and because you want to value yourself And want high value women to value you as well. But not for a certain special cutie, because that means you're doing the right thing for the wrong reasons and you won't get the satisfaction and fulfillment that you would like to get from self improvement.

Per Ardua Ad Astra | "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum"

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(This post was last modified: 05-16-2015 04:07 PM by h3ltrsk3ltr.)
05-16-2015 04:02 PM
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Driesinator
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Post: #10
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
(05-16-2015 03:59 PM)Libertas Wrote:  ^^A Billion Wicked Thoughts has been harshly criticized as pop-psy bullshit. Don't take that shit too seriously.
Nope. I read it on Rollo's recommendation and many of his posts echo its conclusions.

Quote:I’ve recently finished reading “A Billion Wicked Thoughts” by Ogi Ogas PhD. and Sai Gaddam PhD. and I’d have to place it next to The 48 Laws of Power as a seminal work for the Game community. It statistically confirms a lot of Game principles, but at the same time it will challenge more than a few. Highly recommended.

http://therationalmale.com/2011/09/16/a-...-thoughts/
(This post was last modified: 05-16-2015 04:06 PM by XII.)
05-16-2015 04:05 PM
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Libertas Offline
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Post: #11
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Because we all know anything Rollo says is true, of course.

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05-16-2015 04:07 PM
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XII Offline
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RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
(05-16-2015 03:53 PM)Jaffna Wrote:  
(05-16-2015 03:52 PM)XII Wrote:  No.

Female desire is the culmination of a long-held fantasy. Going by the book A Billion Wicked Thoughts she has a detective agency in her head, screening every detail and every part of you to make sure you fit this fantasy and are "hawt." This detective agency literally feeds into her physiological arousal system and prevents her from getting wet for you if you don't meet its criteria.

Unless you want to spend all your time chasing uninterested girls, the best thing is to fit a commonly-held fantasy that girls have and then let them come to you. Tattooed rocker, brooding artist, buff frat boy, CEO, etc. When you fit a girl's fantasy she'll fuck you immediately with very little work on your part.

So girls don't care about your personality, intelligence, wit, ambitions or character. They just want you to fit an archetype.
Unfortunately, they do care about all that shit too. I'd suggest you read A Billion Wicked Thoughts.

In your case, the next time you're on a date, stop thinking so much and invade her personal space and she what she does.
(This post was last modified: 05-16-2015 04:17 PM by XII.)
05-16-2015 04:14 PM
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Driesinator Offline
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Post: #13
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
I advice you to read some of Bonecrackers stuff on this subject.

http://no-maam.blogspot.be/

Alot of his stuff is very red-pill and basically explains that what women say they want, but what they go after are two different things.

I've seen it first hand, girls telling me they all wanted some healthy Ryan Gosling type dude with status, ambition and good family values.

Yet a couple days later spread their legs for a skinny anti-social bad boy rocker type dude with a cocaine addiction.
05-16-2015 04:57 PM
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WestIndianArchie Offline
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RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Troll
05-16-2015 05:40 PM
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Apollo21 Offline
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RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Girls can have a type. Just like Guys can have a type.
However that's a pretty fluid concept...more like a preference.

The question is how strong a preference does she have?
Some girls are very specific while others are more open to
new experiences.

It's best to do your best and gauge her enthusiasm. There's no
point in continuing to pursue a girl who just isn't that into you.

Don't make it about ego(i.e getting the girl). Make it about valuing
your time and going after girls who genuinely want to spend time
with you.

Personally, sleeping with a lot of girls can also be a waste of time
if you also don't want to hang out with them.
05-18-2015 05:53 AM
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fiasco360 Offline
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Post: #16
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Yep.

Don't analyze it too much. Enjoy yourself and her, if the feeling is mutual it will work out. If it's too much work or you don't value the girl enough, then walk away.

Plenty of women have "types" and if you happen to not fit in it but she's still interested in some way, then keep it up. Actions=/=words. If she completely shuts you out, then obviously walk away.
05-18-2015 07:02 AM
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RickyWax Offline
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Post: #17
RE: Is it possible to build a romantic connection when you're not her "type"?
Would you be able to build a romantic connection with a woman that isn't your type?

Anyways back to your question. It depends on the woman in question. Not all are the same. Just as not all guys are the same when it comes to preference. There are women who have a broad range of what they find attractive and there are women who are have a limited range. Women with a strong preference for certain features will be more difficult to have any sort of relationship with in the first place if you don't fit her type, so if it doesn't work then move on to a different one.
06-27-2015 11:16 AM
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