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The Official RVF No Contact Thread
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markus85 Offline
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Post: #76
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
Sage advice Tex. I concur. It's a very liberating feeling knowing they no loner have power over you. Many of these girls I came to realise I never truly liked. They were just masters at getting me stuck in this feed back loop of validation hoping things would get better and that she would eventually be mine.
04-19-2016 03:59 AM
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General Stalin Offline
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Post: #77
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(04-19-2016 12:21 AM)Tex Wrote:  Three years later, just a week or so ago, K texts me out of the blue. After all the improvement I thought I had made, the game I developed, the strength I worked on, my heart still began to race when I saw it was from her.

I knew in my heart I should text her, that this time it would be different. But I also knew that was all a lie. So I didn't.

It's important to know why old flames will hit you up again. 9/10 it's because they are newly single (or about to be) and are going through their rolodex of old dicks. Making sure they have options. Don't let yourself be one. It's insulting in and of itself that this broad thinks she can play you then hit you up again years later for some rebound shit.

Women always look for backup dicks when they're lonely.
04-19-2016 07:45 PM
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Player_1337 Offline
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Post: #78
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(04-19-2016 07:45 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  
(04-19-2016 12:21 AM)Tex Wrote:  Three years later, just a week or so ago, K texts me out of the blue. After all the improvement I thought I had made, the game I developed, the strength I worked on, my heart still began to race when I saw it was from her.

I knew in my heart I should text her, that this time it would be different. But I also knew that was all a lie. So I didn't.

It's important to know why old flames will hit you up again. 9/10 it's because they are newly single (or about to be) and are going through their rolodex of old dicks. Making sure they have options. Don't let yourself be one. It's insulting in and of itself that this broad thinks she can play you then hit you up again years later for some rebound shit.

Women always look for backup dicks when they're lonely.

I've had a lot of flings, but women never seem to come out of the woodwork after it ends/they ghost. Hurts my ego but I suppose it's for the best.

ABC
04-23-2016 10:52 AM
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XPQ22 Offline
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Post: #79
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
So I'm pretty sure the main girl in my rotation (which admittedly isn't large) is getting banged out by another guy on the regular.

Met with her at her place on Tuesday night and she seemed cold. We had dinner, but she wouldn't have sex, which was a first. We fooled around a little bit but she didn't seem really into it. She wasn't on her period as she usually volunteers this information. She gave me a half hearted blowjob, but wouldn't even take off her top. Refused sex - "I'm tired."

I made plans to see her on Saturday and take her to a Chinese place I've been wanting to try out. Tonight she texts me to attempt a reschedule. "So um change of plans maybe? I'd like to check in with you this weekend and I know you'll probably be tired from work on Friday but maybe we could just meet near you for ice cream or something and..."

Check in with me? Am I your fucking dentist?

I text her back "seems like kind of a weak plan."

"Well yeah but there's a lot of stuff I want to do this weekend and blah blah"

I haven't responded. Long story short it sounds like theres another guy who is banging her on the regular, maybe even hooked up with her the night before I saw her and she didn't want to do much because she'd feel like a slut getting banged by two guys on consecutive days. It wouldn't bother me terribly much but it looks like she is also trying to shunt me around this guy, who I bet she made plans with for Saturday instead of me.

I imagine she'd like to hang onto me as a backup because she likes my conversation better, but I don't like the feel I'm getting - think I'm ready to next this one. A reschedule attempt after we've set plans for no good reason other than "there's other stuff I want to do" is kind of unforgivable.
(This post was last modified: 05-11-2016 10:49 PM by XPQ22.)
05-11-2016 10:48 PM
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RunsWithScissors Offline
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Post: #80
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
I'm struggling a bit the past couple of days. I had two of my best friends visit from out of state over the weekend and I know that I'm coming down off the awesome times with them. Then I had to email the ex-gf on Tues about a work thing, only sent a single sentence asking her to take care of something, but just interacting triggered things a bit. And had a couple minor tousles with the ex-wife this week over kid activities and shared expenses. Nothing I can't handle but I'm feeling the most emotionally stirred up that I've been in a a couple of months. I feel like a bitch even talking about it here.

I've had sex with three different women in the past three days, I have 2 good plates including one who is crushing on me hard, and more options in the pipeline. I'm more fit than I've ever been, I get lots of IOI's and chat up pretty much anyone who will talk to me. But I'm feeling a bit empty, like without the high drama of the relationship with the ex-gf life just isn't as rich and meaningful. I guess in some ways I'm like an addict going through withdrawal...

I won't contact her so maybe this doesn't even belong in this thread but I wanted to get it out.
06-02-2016 05:59 PM
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General Stalin Offline
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Post: #81
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(05-11-2016 10:48 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:  So I'm pretty sure the main girl in my rotation (which admittedly isn't large) is getting banged out by another guy on the regular.

Met with her at her place on Tuesday night and she seemed cold. We had dinner, but she wouldn't have sex, which was a first. We fooled around a little bit but she didn't seem really into it. She wasn't on her period as she usually volunteers this information. She gave me a half hearted blowjob, but wouldn't even take off her top. Refused sex - "I'm tired."

I made plans to see her on Saturday and take her to a Chinese place I've been wanting to try out. Tonight she texts me to attempt a reschedule. "So um change of plans maybe? I'd like to check in with you this weekend and I know you'll probably be tired from work on Friday but maybe we could just meet near you for ice cream or something and..."

Check in with me? Am I your fucking dentist?

I text her back "seems like kind of a weak plan."

"Well yeah but there's a lot of stuff I want to do this weekend and blah blah"

I haven't responded. Long story short it sounds like theres another guy who is banging her on the regular, maybe even hooked up with her the night before I saw her and she didn't want to do much because she'd feel like a slut getting banged by two guys on consecutive days. It wouldn't bother me terribly much but it looks like she is also trying to shunt me around this guy, who I bet she made plans with for Saturday instead of me.

I imagine she'd like to hang onto me as a backup because she likes my conversation better, but I don't like the feel I'm getting - think I'm ready to next this one. A reschedule attempt after we've set plans for no good reason other than "there's other stuff I want to do" is kind of unforgivable.

So are you going to stop contacting her? Assuming thats why you put it in this thread.

You analysis is likely 100% correct. Biggest reason a girl you're steadily seeing starts going cold is when another man has her interest. Do yourself a favor and don't chase after her for plans if she is making it difficult. I would go cold and let her reach out (she might not). Seek other trim.

Quote:I won't contact her so maybe this doesn't even belong in this thread but I wanted to get it out.

Thats what it's all about man. Stay strong. You are with other girls it shouldn't be that hard to get your mind off of it.
06-02-2016 06:38 PM
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Adonis Offline
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Post: #82
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
I had this FB for about 2 months that I broke it off with on Monday. She was pretty cool, loves guns, climbing, Trump and she was tight as fuck but she started displaying some BPD red flags. The last several times we saw each other she would get butt hurt over the smallest things like me not stopping for coffee, or not complementing her enough or not taking her seriously enough.....#needybitch.

I broke it off politely but she's been texting me argumentative stuff such as:

-"I really don't like this decision"
-"I knew you couldn't handle me"
-"I'm going to lift more than you"
-"I can be a bigger asshole than you"

I really want to destroy this bitch and the few things I know about her past would make it a walk in the park to do so, but I think silence will sting the most.
06-02-2016 07:31 PM
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spygoat Offline
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Post: #83
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
^Most definitely man. All of the texts she sent you were bait trying to get you to suck in and feed the drama-gravy-train.

While I generally don't fuck with girls too much - now that you have realized she is just trying to fuck with you, you could say some shit that would fuck with her like 'you may lift more than me but at least I don't have a stinky tuna pussy' or something like that...but she didn't sound too too bad, let her go, silent treatment, don't jade her for the next rvfer.
06-02-2016 07:57 PM
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YoungAngel1 Offline
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Post: #84
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(06-02-2016 07:31 PM)P Bateman Wrote:  I had this FB for about 2 months that I broke it off with on Monday. She was pretty cool, loves guns, climbing, Trump and she was tight as fuck but she started displaying some BPD red flags. The last several times we saw each other she would get butt hurt over the smallest things like me not stopping for coffee, or not complementing her enough or not taking her seriously enough.....#needybitch.

I broke it off politely but she's been texting me argumentative stuff such as:

-"I really don't like this decision"
-"I knew you couldn't handle me"
-"I'm going to lift more than you"
-"I can be a bigger asshole than you"

I really want to destroy this bitch and the few things I know about her past would make it a walk in the park to do so, but I think silence will sting the most.

Don't! Just leave it alone. I countered punched my ex after a couple things that she said, and I'll admit I took it a step too far. This bitch went to send screenshots to my brother/sister on Facebook of what I said to her. Luckily I was just able to quickly dismiss it, but I could only imagine if she sent shit like that to a manager at work, or your parents.

She's already showing sings, just leave it alone, and move on.
06-02-2016 08:16 PM
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Phoenix Offline
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Post: #85
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
Lol what is this stuff? A chick getting needy and wanting attention or asking for things isn't her "being a bitch". Her indirectly expressing her emotions through texts when you break it off isn't her "being a bitch".

You "really want to destroy this bitch" for these non-slights? Perhaps Bateman is an appropriate username.
06-02-2016 11:27 PM
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Adonis Offline
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Post: #86
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(06-02-2016 11:27 PM)Phoenix Wrote:  Lol what is this stuff? A chick getting needy and wanting attention or asking for things isn't her "being a bitch". Her indirectly expressing her emotions through texts when you break it off isn't her "being a bitch".

You "really want to destroy this bitch" for these non-slights? Perhaps Bateman is an appropriate username.

Perhaps lost in translation but yelling, crying, and being vindictive over these petty little things (like me telling her she looked "nice" instead of "beautiful", really?) I take as attempts at manipulation. My ex-wife started with close to the same things before starting to throw threatening suicide into the mix. I also meant destroy as in via text, not in the real world.

Regardless, your point is well taken and it is just not that serious to warrant that type of involvement from me. Thanks for the reality check Thumb up
(This post was last modified: 06-03-2016 12:05 AM by Adonis.)
06-03-2016 12:04 AM
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tomzestatlu Offline
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Post: #87
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
Good thread. Sometimes I only can think of things that say "yes write to her", even though I know that only possible option is to do not write. Reading other decisions about "no writing" can help remind me that "no" is the right answer.

I keep all things from my ex-gfs, it´s just a "things". This christmas I broke up with one and few days before she gave me gifts and there were fragrance and t-shirt between them. Just after break-up I began to use and wear it when going out at the evening and it gave me a lot of luck with women and brought me few good bangs. I actucally know it wasn´t caused by it, but I was thinking about it that way, so it helped me... anyway that "magic" already faded away... unluckily

"Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people."
06-03-2016 03:32 AM
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All or Nothing Offline
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Post: #88
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
Broke up with my girlfriend recently and haven't talked to her since.

All or Nothing has a "fuck it" approach to these kinds of things.
06-03-2016 04:14 AM
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Don's D Offline
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RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
I took a break from females because of an injury I had, decided to concentrate on healing both physically and mentally.

Now what happens with the first girl I bag?
You guessed it, Oneitis!!

A lot of red flags including a "serious" boyfriend and my dumbass still fell. I'm not going to lie though, this gut wrenching feeling is exactly what I needed to remind me of the consequences.
I feel like texting her, calling her and no bullshit even buying her stuff.

Last night I went out for dinner and see this girl eyeing me. Imediately I walk up to her, introduced my self, and ended up having diner with her and her sister. Grabbed her number, they paid for my dinner because they had a gift card. Today I feel way better, almost as if I don't remember the other girl.
Loneliness makes you do and feel stupid stuff.
06-03-2016 10:52 AM
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Post: #90
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
Starting this year, I soft-nexted a girl who friendzoned me years ago. Well, she friendzoned me because I was a guy who behaved like a beta bitch without game and she lost interest when I didn't push for the bang.

Surprisingly, she's writing me e-mails asking me "When are we going to see each other?". I don't know whether to respond her e-mails with a dick pic (not of my junk obviously) or don't write her at all.
(This post was last modified: 06-03-2016 12:42 PM by DrCotard.)
06-03-2016 12:40 PM
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tomzestatlu Offline
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RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
Damn, just met my ex-gf, who left me exactly 1 month ago. I just finished my outdoor workout (today 2nd traning) and seen her with not really handsome older guy, who seemed to be really fat. Hard to believe what she changed me for.

"Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people."
06-07-2016 12:03 PM
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General Stalin Offline
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Post: #92
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(06-03-2016 12:40 PM)DrCotard Wrote:  Starting this year, I soft-nexted a girl who friendzoned me years ago. Well, she friendzoned me because I was a guy who behaved like a beta bitch without game and she lost interest when I didn't push for the bang.

Surprisingly, she's writing me e-mails asking me "When are we going to see each other?". I don't know whether to respond her e-mails with a dick pic (not of my junk obviously) or don't write her at all.

Do a lot of dudes think this way? Don't send her a dick pic. If she is reaching out to you it may be an easy lay. She is likely recently single and remembered you being attractive and, ultimately, and option. Setup a date and go for that notch, just don't be the chump she remembers. Be sexy and flirty. Touch. get her back to your place to "have some drinks and catch up."
06-07-2016 02:10 PM
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Post: #93
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(06-07-2016 12:03 PM)tomzestatlu Wrote:  Damn, just met my ex-gf, who left me exactly 1 month ago. I just finished my outdoor workout (today 2nd traning) and seen her with not really handsome older guy, who seemed to be really fat. Hard to believe what she changed me for.

Seeing your ex-bitch with other men is tough if you broke it off not on your terms. You'll feel like shit if he seems better than you... and you'll feel like shit if he seems worse than you.

The thing to remember is he has nothing to do with you. Don't let the idea in your head that she is with this guy to spite you somehow. She's out of your life and now you're free and onto bigger and better things (and prettier, sweeter women).
06-07-2016 02:13 PM
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Post: #94
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(06-07-2016 02:10 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  
(06-03-2016 12:40 PM)DrCotard Wrote:  Starting this year, I soft-nexted a girl who friendzoned me years ago. Well, she friendzoned me because I was a guy who behaved like a beta bitch without game and she lost interest when I didn't push for the bang.

Surprisingly, she's writing me e-mails asking me "When are we going to see each other?". I don't know whether to respond her e-mails with a dick pic (not of my junk obviously) or don't write her at all.

Do a lot of dudes think this way? Don't send her a dick pic. If she is reaching out to you it may be an easy lay. She is likely recently single and remembered you being attractive and, ultimately, and option. Setup a date and go for that notch, just don't be the chump she remembers. Be sexy and flirty. Touch. get her back to your place to "have some drinks and catch up."

Thank you so much Comrade Stalin for your advice. Definitively you're right: It's not a good idea to send dick pics.
06-07-2016 10:14 PM
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Mercia Offline
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Post: #95
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
What a timely thread. I too, just broke up with my girlfriend of over 3 years. Crazily enough, I was just dragged on a plane trip to see her parents just this January and she was bugging me to find a place to live with her.

We're kinda friends, but it's definitely good to move on. Things will never reach the highs when she was running great female game on me (buying me shit, doing my chores, supporting me while I was rebooting my career). I was quite the cad and douche. Ah well.

Some of the stuff I did, similar to others:
  • Kept her as friends on social media, but removed her from my feeds
  • Also removed our common friends that she hangs out with a lot, so their feed doesn't clutter up our shit
  • Returned all the useless low-value shit to her (photos, ugly clothes). Kept the good stuff.
  • Went into monk mode
  • Hit the gym 5 times a week, swimming and running
  • Interviewing and fishing for more lucrative job offers
  • Doing night classes & non-profit consulting work
  • Building a new social circle of people
  • No fapping & minimal porn
  • Hunting for a better pad

Gym in particular has been super effective. Sometimes you get a little sentimental and bogged down - once I hit the gym the endorphins kick in and you're on top of the world!
(This post was last modified: 06-17-2016 04:08 AM by Mercia.)
06-17-2016 04:07 AM
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Post: #96
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(06-03-2016 12:40 PM)DrCotard Wrote:  Starting this year, I soft-nexted a girl who friendzoned me years ago. Well, she friendzoned me because I was a guy who behaved like a beta bitch without game and she lost interest when I didn't push for the bang.

Surprisingly, she's writing me e-mails asking me "When are we going to see each other?". I don't know whether to respond her e-mails with a dick pic (not of my junk obviously) or don't write her at all.

Update: she made me a call yesterday and I didn't answer the phone. Feels good to avoid contact with a girl like her.
07-09-2016 11:15 AM
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Post: #97
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
A VERY-long-story-turned-very-story that got me into the game.

5 year on and off relationship with BPD girl. I thought she was everything to me and I put her feelings before mine and I put my feelings and thoughts in her hands. She grew distant from me twice and broke up with for another guy. Twice. Two different guys. Of course I stayed friends. I wanted to speak to her whenever I could and I helped her when I could. I grew angry and bitter and thought this isn't healthy. I need to cut this girl loose. She played me like a fiddle. I couldn't do it. Until she got another boyfriend and I snapped. I told her exactly how she made me feel, how she does make me feel and how humiliated I was about everything.

But of course we still spoke like friends as if nothing happened. Until for a couple of days she stopped talking to me. In those few days I found Bang and read that. Turns out she lost her way and was in jail for a week or so. She messages me when she got out. My response: "This is the last thing you'll here from me. Goodbye." Went out that night and the night after to get over my hump, get over my social anxieties and started approaching girls left, right and center. With thoughts of her and how she made me feel I turned into a machine I never thought existed.

After all the calls, texts and mutual friends we have, 6 months later I still haven't contacted her. Welcome to the No Contact Thread.

Radio silence.
Her loss.

Next.
07-09-2016 11:39 AM
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RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
(07-09-2016 11:39 AM)SaintEll Wrote:  A VERY-long-story-turned-very-story that got me into the game.

5 year on and off relationship with BPD girl. I thought she was everything to me and I put her feelings before mine and I put my feelings and thoughts in her hands. She grew distant from me twice and broke up with for another guy. Twice. Two different guys. Of course I stayed friends. I wanted to speak to her whenever I could and I helped her when I could. I grew angry and bitter and thought this isn't healthy. I need to cut this girl loose. She played me like a fiddle. I couldn't do it. Until she got another boyfriend and I snapped. I told her exactly how she made me feel, how she does make me feel and how humiliated I was about everything.

But of course we still spoke like friends as if nothing happened. Until for a couple of days she stopped talking to me. In those few days I found Bang and read that. Turns out she lost her way and was in jail for a week or so. She messages me when she got out. My response: "This is the last thing you'll here from me. Goodbye." Went out that night and the night after to get over my hump, get over my social anxieties and started approaching girls left, right and center. With thoughts of her and how she made me feel I turned into a machine I never thought existed.

After all the calls, texts and mutual friends we have, 6 months later I still haven't contacted her. Welcome to the No Contact Thread.

Radio silence.
Her loss.

Next.

Clap

"Feminism is a trade union for ugly women"- Peregrine
07-11-2016 07:37 AM
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laq8ty Offline
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Post: #99
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
This is a great thread. I broke up with a girl I dated over 1.5 years ago (LTR for a year)- haven't had contact since then as I blocked her phone number, fb, ig, etc. Sometimes I get nostalgic and think of the good memories but then I remind myself of how this girl had such a bad attitude, picked huge fights with me over no reason, was older than me, had a 15-20+ notch count, complained all the time, was jaded as fuck with dating in general, and had a long list of drama with prior exes.

I think the best motivation after a breakup is to better yourself as much as you can. Its not for revenge its for building your character. This girl I broke up with didn't truly appreciate me until after I walked out- then she spent the next 8 months trying to get back with me but I didn't take her back (we were in the same grad school class). During this time she was the sweetest girl- it was as if she was another person...had she been like this during the LTR I prob wouldn't have bounced. Still didn't take her back. Now that she graduated- I don't see her at school anymore but she's around- so one does hear small talk now and again from mutual acquaintances .
07-11-2016 04:13 PM
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Post: #100
RE: The Official RVF No Contact Thread
What is the purpose of no contacting at all? I ended a relationship of almost 10 years, this person is like a family for me.
07-11-2016 04:25 PM
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