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Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
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Fortis Away
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Post: #51
RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
^ No one here is bickering. What are you on about?

I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
06-25-2016 10:06 PM
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262 Offline
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
This thread is not going in the direction I hoped for Tongue
06-26-2016 04:47 AM
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
This is not a funny comment per se, but I'll repost this video here from the Forum Lounge:


(06-26-2016 04:24 PM)CH-Toronto Wrote:  8/10 Troll Job





From the YouTube Description

Quote:A GLOBAL RENAISSANCE: RI Spring Crowdfunding Campaign: https://igg.me/at/Gp17O7r2ymo/x/11078070
Sometimes the best way to prove the insanity of your opponents, is to give them exactly what they want
Here's something you don't see every day...a German politician fighting back against political correctness which has risen to the point of insanity.

In the parliament of Brandenburg recently, the Green Party introduced a bill to adopt a "Campaign for Acceptance of Gender and Sexual diversity, Self-Determination and against Homo and Trans-phobia in Brandenburg" as well as "Giving equal rights and societal equality for LGBTTQQ (Lesbian, Gay, Bi-sexual, Trans, Two-spirit, Queer, Questioning) people in Brandenburg"
The Green Party, which still holds a substantial share of the vote in Germany, is notorious for their advocacy of homosexual marriage and adoption as well as pedophilia and promotion of "trans-gender" agendas. (One Green Party leader, Daniel Cohn-Bendit even openly bragged about raping kindergartners.)

Germany already has strict "hate speech" laws that effectively criminalize any criticism of racial or religious minorities - those laws may soon include criticism of someone's self-proclaimed "gender."

Enter Steffen Königer of Germany's new Alternative for Germany party (German acronym: AfD). AfD is known for being a Euroskeptic party which opposes mass immigration to Germany and political correctness. Königer rose to voice his party's opposition to the measure, which was also supported by the Left Party and the Social Democratic Party.

Not wanting to leave anyone out, Königer opened his speech "Dear Ladies and Gentleman..." and then took the complete list of 60 possible genders which has been adopted by Facebook, and proceeded to name each one in a salutation which lasted over 3 minutes. Even the establishment politicians sitting behind him could not fail to recognize the brilliance of his response.

There may be hope for Germany yet.
06-26-2016 10:12 PM
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Suits Offline
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
(08-20-2016 10:11 AM)Repo Wrote:  The date in the mall was going well. I think she was vibing with my attitude, though I confess I was only in the higher beta mindset as I have not yet fully ascended to alpha. Then, in a shocking turn of events, while I was hovering my hand behind her back pondering how to establish kino, the escalator appeared out of nowhere. Before I could anticipate the most alpha move, she stepped on the escalator.

The 8 inches of height that the first step gave her put her at a 3 inch height advantage over me. My heart dropped as quick as my SMV, 4.3 points to be exact. At which point I started a new forum thread to ask the obvious, if my SMV drops but she doesn't know, has it really dropped? As long as she continued to look ahead and not back at me, it was essentially Schrodingers SMV.

Desperate to keep the attention off me, I pointed away and blurted the first thing that came to mind. "Look! Trump is over there making America great again! "

Rather than looking where I pointed, she turned back and looked right at me. The SMV drop was now tangible. But worse, by not following my lead and looking where I pointed, this meant that I was already in the hole before the SMV drop was real. That, or she wasn't very smart. Either way, I had to save face.

When we reached the top of the escalator, I spun her around. We were now facing each other, in a tense standoff, only 6 inches apart. It was time to be alpha.

"You have fun shopping, I'm not going to be your beta bux. I'm going to make like a tree and leave."

I'm the King of Beijing!
08-21-2016 05:25 AM
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
(09-11-2016 04:23 PM)The Beast1 Wrote:  I've got some good house party stories.

One time at this house party i opened a set to this HB 9/10 about high end zebras and micro pigs.

But then this guy came out of nowhere and AMOGged my girl with stories of flying jets and sailing off of the coasts of Venezuela.

Thankfully, being the Bozz that i am i kept questioning him until it became apparent he was making it all up.

The party ran out of beer shortly after and it started to get lame. Thankfully this Hawaiin guy showed up with 6 thirty racks of beer in wal mart bags.

The energy must have become too HIGH because this little guy appeared out of the dark and started wailing on these 30 guys hanging outside. I left with my girl and got the covoted Pitt Cairn Island flag.

I'm the King of Beijing!
09-11-2016 06:22 PM
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
(09-29-2016 01:33 PM)jabba Wrote:  I enjoy farting and don't mind it when girls fart. In fact, girls normally fart with an with a puppy face. I find it adorable and get a chuckle from the bottom of my belly.

We all fart. It's an emotional language with many dialects. A skilled farter can actually communicate and compose great melodies. For those who prefer a muted version, just ask her to spread her ass cheeks to produce a wind-only hiss.

Just ask her not to fart when you're eating her pussy. This is common courtesy.

I'm the King of Beijing!
09-30-2016 07:12 AM
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TrifeLife Offline
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
(01-05-2010 09:00 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  Pretty decent data sheet actually.

Some things to add:

From Tijuana to Ensenada you will find arguably the sickest waves on the west coast. Many are secret spots. People don't tell. I know them, don't ask me. There is minimal info on the internet on this as well. My advice? Go explore. No one will tell you.

Tijuana has some beautiful upper class girls. I have dated plenty.

But if you think you are going to roll into TJ and start swooping, well, lets just say your efforts are better placed elsewhere. This is a triple black diamond type city. Not even Mystery or Neil Strauss is pulling this off. Ha.

This is Manifesto only turf.

Also, keep in mind, there is a heavy drug war going on here: http://www.thegmanifesto.com/2008/07/tij...ng-on.html

I have written on the subject a lot. Refer to The Manifesto if interested.

Not for the faint of heart.

In addition, I should be rolling to Guadalajara this year with some heavies, so hopefully I will have some info soon for you guys.
10-03-2016 08:26 PM
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GlobalMan Away
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
el mechanico Wrote:  MikeCF's phone call to Poland..

MCF: Hey, I represent my client there in your country

KPD ( Polish PD) : Who are you? What do you ask?

MCF: I demand you free him or I'm coming to consolidate with one of my Polish colleagues and will file suit for declamation of characters.

KPD: Do you mean MikeZF? Z is a vowel here so name make no sense

MCF: May I speak to your superior. Now!

KPD: Dobra notz dis Janusz how can I help you?

MCF: You guys are not in compliance with the Geneva convention I demand you release Roosh V****** right fucking now!

KPD: You practice law Poland?

MCF: NOW!

KPD: MikeZF, Poland is different place

MCF: Fuck this!

KPD: Thank you, come again.

Americans are dreamers too
(This post was last modified: 10-26-2016 09:59 PM by GlobalMan.)
10-26-2016 09:52 PM
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(10-28-2016 04:58 PM)greekgod Wrote:  This is what happened.

Weiner was being a good boy on the forum. He was using his imagination to tell fantastic stories of sailing the globe, swimming with teens, playing beach volleyball, and flying Luke Skywalker's X-Wing. Until one day this asshole named AboveAverageJoe outed his fantasies. Weiner being the coward he is didnt want to answer the chargers and reveal that he was on this forum to learn game. His silence led to him being banned.

So with all this free time on his hands he turns to his wife to rekindle their marriage. "Huma, I'm imagining some really kinky shit tonight. Your going to pour hot wax on my dick and enrage me until I playrole rape you in your hijab. And then after that you're going to brand "Carlos Danger" into left butt cheek."

"Honey, I'm sorry...I'm busy on the campaign trail breaking glass ceilings for the most transparent women to ever run for office. She's done so much for the country that we just have to get her elected. Plus, I already got a side piece I scissor with here on the campaign trail. I wont tell you who but lets just say she forgets my performances, good and bad, so I'm always having to prove myself. Kinda like 50 first dates but more like twenty years of labia on labia friction. Take care of the kids while I'm on the road. And keep off the internet, you'll only get in trouble"

"Fucking bitch, If she gets to keep her side piece than I get a new one. Hmm, PSAT's study group, ripe for pickings. If those guys had let me stay on the forum I would have eventually got around to learning game. Owell, I'm smart..they'll definitely let me tutor these teenagers"

Scandal breaks. Huma does the strong women thing and divorces him.

Anthony (NTP) after being turned away by so many goes black pill and burns the whole bitch down.

The real hero in this whole scenario is AAJ for making Anthony so desperate that he went down this path of self destruction.

Cheers AAJ!

I'm the King of Beijing!
10-28-2016 11:58 PM
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GlobalMan Away
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(11-13-2012 08:55 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  Tell all of them to suck your big Mcqueen cock for starters. Why are you calling her mom?? You fell into family drama being on the defensive make you look like a cunt.

Like I said tell them all to suck you off then she'll be in touch

Americans are dreamers too
04-23-2017 10:37 PM
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(04-23-2017 10:37 PM)GlobalMan Wrote:  
(11-13-2012 08:55 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  Tell all of them to suck your big Mcqueen cock for starters. Why are you calling her mom?? You fell into family drama being on the defensive make you look like a cunt.

Like I said tell them all to suck you off then she'll be in touch

I was actually going to make that quote my signature a while back. Probably my favorite post in forum history. El Mech started out with the intention of helping McQueen out, then ended up constantly getting into arguments with him.
04-24-2017 08:45 PM
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GlobalMan Away
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
(05-18-2011 02:02 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  I love Aqua Teen so much I painted the front door of my house to match the one on the show (shakes outline)

Americans are dreamers too
07-30-2017 03:04 PM
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SpiderKing Offline
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
Regarding a possible workplace tryst/lawsuit:

(07-31-2017 03:19 AM)H1N1 Wrote:  I would also say that since you are likely to cause yourself significant heartache when you do end up fucking her, it is imperative that you get anal underway early on in the proceedings. It will provide some consolation in the midst of the swirling uncertainty and destitution which will follow this dalliance to know that you did at least fuck her in the arse. It's been my recent experience that few things kindle the embers of the heart in the midst of female-induced despair quite like knowing that at least you did that.

"The whole point of being alpha, is doing what the fuck you want.
That's why you see real life alphas without chicks. He's doing him.

Real alphas don't tend to have game. They don't tend to care about the emotional lives of the people around them."

-WIA
07-31-2017 10:35 AM
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
From the "Casanova Conman" thread, I give you HCE:

Quote:Just from reading the title I knew that either the age or BMI of victims could not possibly be below 40.

https://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-64303...pid1630944

Just think of all the different occasions you could use this line...
08-15-2017 09:48 AM
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Paracelsus Offline
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
Canopus talking shit in the Donald Trump thread!

Quote:So I still have a tub of this godawful protein powder Arnold hawked from a couple years ago, and it's mostly full because I tried it for exactly two days while I was lifting. The ghosts of the resulting shits still haunt my place, swear to God. It wreaked havoc on my colon. I remember I tried blending it with coconut milk the first day, and then just plain cold water the next day after nearly obliterating my toilet. Same result. I shit the entire Ten Plagues of Egypt trying this stuff, decided I'd rather not risk gassing everyone in the gym on my next Leg Day, and promptly switched back to Optimum Nutrition. It may be the schoolboy's protein powder, but it gets the job done, and I don't have to worry about laying down a torpedo while I'm working a deadlift.

But see, I still have the Arnold tub. I always knew I kept it for a reason.

The day Bill Kristol peaces out, I will chug a quart of that powder, and then personally drive to the cemetery, drop my pants, squat as hard as any man has ever dared, and take the mother of all protein shits on his grave. He will be screaming in the bowels of Hell and I'll make fucking sure it's raining on his head.

Remissas, discite, vivet.
God save us from people who mean well. -storm
11-21-2017 11:18 PM
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Praetor Lupus Offline
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
(11-21-2017 11:18 PM)Paracelsus Wrote:  Canopus talking shit in the Donald Trump thread!

Quote:So I still have a tub of this godawful protein powder Arnold hawked from a couple years ago, and it's mostly full because I tried it for exactly two days while I was lifting. The ghosts of the resulting shits still haunt my place, swear to God. It wreaked havoc on my colon. I remember I tried blending it with coconut milk the first day, and then just plain cold water the next day after nearly obliterating my toilet. Same result. I shit the entire Ten Plagues of Egypt trying this stuff, decided I'd rather not risk gassing everyone in the gym on my next Leg Day, and promptly switched back to Optimum Nutrition. It may be the schoolboy's protein powder, but it gets the job done, and I don't have to worry about laying down a torpedo while I'm working a deadlift.

But see, I still have the Arnold tub. I always knew I kept it for a reason.

The day Bill Kristol peaces out, I will chug a quart of that powder, and then personally drive to the cemetery, drop my pants, squat as hard as any man has ever dared, and take the mother of all protein shits on his grave. He will be screaming in the bowels of Hell and I'll make fucking sure it's raining on his head.

I second this. I almost laughed myself into a coma reading that.

"The only purpose for which power can be rightfully exercised over any member of a civilised community, against his will, is to prevent harm to others...in the part which merely concerns himself, his independence is, of right, absolute." - John Stuart Mill, On Liberty
11-28-2017 08:24 PM
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Built to Fade Away
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
From the "Bank Teller Chicks" thread, RatInTheWoods sets it straight:
(04-10-2018 05:59 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  I say make a deposit in her safety box while her interest rates are high.
_______________________________________________
"How does one give a hint? Be obviously pedantic when dishing out a truth." #219
12-08-2018 08:00 AM
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
From the Climate Change Expert Chokes Fiance Out thread, Aurini delivers this golden nugget:

Quote:Sp5 Wrote: Climate change science has nothing to do with feminism, free college, socialist health care, or transgender bathroom policy.

None of those things have anything to do with one another. And yet, if you tell me where you stand on one of them, I can predict with 95% certainty where you stand on the rest.

Funny how that works.

"Intellectuals are naturally attracted by the idea of a planned society, in the belief that they will be in charge of it" -Roger Scruton
12-31-2018 01:39 PM
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Regent Offline
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
In the Woman travels hours for tinder date only to be called fat thread, Syberpunk comments in response to fatty's screeching:
Quote:"Lets be clear on one thing, nobody runs in your family"
09-11-2019 06:53 AM
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A curt response in a thread on whether former sluts can be wifed up:

(01-23-2018 09:05 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Would you trust a former drug addict to stay clean if giant sacks of heroin were walking around the street and occasionally running daygame on them?
09-11-2019 11:48 AM
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Not so much a comment, but sometimes Kona's posts are funnier because of the Aloha! at the end.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

http://inspiredentrepreneur.weebly.com/
09-15-2019 05:49 PM
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RE: Funny Stand-Alone Comments By RVF Members
Not a Second Hander posts what members posts looks like in response to the question, "why did the chicken cross the road?"

Quote:Going Strong

Why wouldn't the 3rd world "subsaharan" hungry chicken cross over to the wealthy side? "Leftist" scum have been encouraging free range subsaharan cocks with free corn since that Phaguette Macron and traitor Merkel have taken power. The chicken would never cross the road in a all white country like Argentina.

Samseau

The root of the issue is the moral bankruptcy of the farmer raising the chicken. If the farmer raised his chicks with Christian values, how many chicken would you think even would dare cross that devils road?

WestIndianArchie

Chicken crossing the road for corn is basic game. Real game is when you can get your chicken to get you corn, boil it, prep some sweet corn and add some cucumber, silantro, lettuce and parmesan to make salad. Old school black men have been doing this for decades. White boys still dont get it.

Veloce

I just figured out the chicken is a Flemish red rooster. That breed shouldn't get near corn unless you want the flesh to be uncharacteristically soft. I prefer my Flemish roosters be fed truffles past one month. To each their own, I'll be playing guitar and doing psychedelics cant stand a world where Flemish red roosters are fed corn.

Cobra

The question is, how do we even know it's a chicken? Has the chicken met any forum members? Crossing the street is cool and all but how do we know the chicken isn't just pulling that out of its ass? I'll be watching the developments closely.

LINUX

Some chicken cross the road. Some stay in their pens all their life. Some die of avian flu at 1 week old. Life is not fair and no one can tell the chicken what it can and cannot do. I'm the end, were all like that chicken. We see something we like we go after it. We might get it or die while crossing the road. Do what makes you happy.

Steelex

One chicken fucking pathetic. That's what 150 grams of protein? Thats not even enough for a mid morning snack. Let me know when u have 10 chicken crossing the road then I maybe would give a flying fuck.

Beyond Borders

Good job chicken. Some tips when u cross back or intend on coming back. Always look left and right for traffic. It's better to walk slowly that to quickly cross the road. Also diversifying your diet past corn would do wonders for your mental health. It certainly helped me. All the best and let me know how the next road crossing goes for you.

Hank Moody

I was riding on my motorcycle into the sunset when I saw this same chicken crossing the road. I stopped, gave it a fist bump and told my blonde girlfriend who was riding behind me to give it a fist bump too. The chicken was tearing up cuz the moment was too beautiful. I looked it in the eye because I'm only 5'5 and consoled it with a pair of 1500 dollar Bose chicken headphones. Then I rode off and never contacted the chicken again. My girl still gets wet over that chicken encounter.

Quintile Curtius

Quite interesting. Chicken have been revered as noble animals since Sumerian times, the fact that this particular one had the courage and mental strength to venture outside it's pen and make a daring escape for better conditions across the road is testament to the timeless avian ideals of consistency, perseverance and facing your fears straight on. Like a Roman. Something millenials must learn sooner rather than later.

Scorpion

Chicken have been crossing the road since time immemorial. The question is why the chicken crossed the road. In old times, it would have crossed the road to feed it's chicks or save a sibling. Now it is crossing the road for no reason except to get corn. Didn't it it have enough feed back at the pen? It did but when you live in a decadent farm that glorifies gluttony as the ultimate good, this is what happens. Stray chicken on major highways causing the end of society.

Lizard of Oz

Scorpion relax. The chicken crossing is anything but symptomatic of a dying farm. It in fact shows the great health, vigor and energy of the farm that a chicken, usually a timid animal - the very definition of cowardice can muster up enough courage to cross the road and get it's own. Only a fantastic farm could raise winner chicken like that.

TigerMandingo

No wonder. Article says chicken is American. Eastern European birds would rather die than leave their farms where their friends, family and owner live. They might take longer to domesticate but once they are loyalty is guaranteed.

Kaotic

Guys!! I followed the chicken across the road and there's this 7/10 farmers daughter feeding it corn. Number closed her and met her the same night. Moonshine. Make out. Fire up my truck and drive back to SoCal before I get lynched lol. Need to focus on work been on a 3 day sex and alcohol bender. Bad idea to follow that damn chicken. Oh well. I'll live!

Cattle Rustler

That chicken nigga gay. Let it cross the road who cares? I only chase a check never chase a chick.

https://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-69282.html
(This post was last modified: 09-19-2019 03:51 PM by Regent.)
09-19-2019 03:40 PM
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