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Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Post: #401
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Reunion is a small island in the Indian ocean. It's a beautiful island, with many nice towns. One of them is called Le Tampon.

[Image: 97430.jpg]

I went there once, but I was only there for a short period.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

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06-25-2019 07:06 PM
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Tex Cruise Offline
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Post: #402
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
I didn't like it there myself.

All stuck-up c#%*s.

(01-19-2016 11:26 PM)ordinaryleastsquared Wrote:  I stand by my analysis.
06-25-2019 07:19 PM
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Tex Cruise Offline
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Post: #403
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
There was one particular incident, it was the one time of the month I spent in LeTampon that things got a bit crazy.
I was there with another forum member called Little Dark, and one night we were out at the club when some bitch started shoving him. Well, LD saw red and next thing he's in a huge fight against 30 white knights. Of course she was the one pulling the strings, and she set the men straight onto him.
LD shouted at them to "Go home!", and they all ran back to their pads like little girls.
Bloody pussies.

(01-19-2016 11:26 PM)ordinaryleastsquared Wrote:  I stand by my analysis.
(This post was last modified: 06-30-2019 10:53 PM by Tex Cruise.)
06-30-2019 10:49 PM
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MichaelWitcoff Online
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Post: #404
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
I was going to tell you all my favorite time-travel joke, but unfortunately none of you liked it.

Return Of Kings contributor and best-selling author of "On The Masons And Their Lies."
07-01-2019 01:13 AM
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Tex Cruise Offline
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Post: #405
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Well, I laughed at it next time you post it. But it wasn't funny the time before because I hadn't already not heard it again.

(01-19-2016 11:26 PM)ordinaryleastsquared Wrote:  I stand by my analysis.
07-01-2019 03:36 AM
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Lost in Transfiguration Offline
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Post: #406
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
"My political hero is the Mayor from JAWS. Yes. Because he KEPT THE BEACHES OPEN. Yes, he REPUDIATED, he FORESWORE and he ABROGATED all these silly regulations on health and safety and declared that the people should SWIM! SWIM! Now, I accept that as a result some small children were eaten by a shark. But how much more pleasure did the MAJORITY get from those beaches as a result of the boldness of the Mayor in Jaws?"

--Boris Johnson, Tory candidate for PM.
07-02-2019 01:44 AM
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Post: #407
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Chess grand master allegedly caught cheating on toilet.

https://nypost.com/2019/07/13/chess-gran...ournament/

It sickens me how people can be so nonchalant about breaking the Lord's commandments.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

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07-13-2019 07:44 PM
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Post: #408
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Roosh is a microgynotheist. He puts women under the microscope and prays for their salvation.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

http://inspiredentrepreneur.weebly.com/
07-20-2019 03:59 AM
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Levaduro Offline
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Post: #409
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
what is a woman pregnant of a baby girl?

A cleaning kit
07-21-2019 10:44 AM
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Kona Online
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Post: #410
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
I've been dating a set of twins.

At first, it was tough telling them apart. I figured out a little trick though. I just made sure to always remember that Becky has the long hair, and Bob has the penis.

Aloha!
07-28-2019 03:29 PM
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debeguiled Offline
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Post: #411
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
(07-28-2019 03:29 PM)Kona Wrote:  I've been dating a set of twins.

At first, it was tough telling them apart. I figured out a little trick though. I just made sure to always remember that Becky has the long hair, and Bob has the penis.

Aloha!

Roosh is trying to move the forum in a new direction.

Not in any direction.

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07-28-2019 03:46 PM
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Post: #412
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Roosh was a microbiologist. With that in mind, could you please scroll up a bit and read my last joke. It's very witty. It hurts me that I didn't get a like.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

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07-28-2019 07:28 PM
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Tex Cruise Offline
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Post: #413
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
(07-28-2019 07:28 PM)Vladimir Poontang Wrote:  It hurts me that I didn't get a like.
I liked this one instead.

Other people getting hurt, now THAT'S funny.

[Image: GaseousForsakenBufeo-size_restricted.gif]

(01-19-2016 11:26 PM)ordinaryleastsquared Wrote:  I stand by my analysis.
07-28-2019 08:29 PM
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Post: #414
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
When I was younger people laughed when I told them that I was going to be a comedian some day. Yeah, well, they're not laughing now.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

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07-30-2019 07:35 PM
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Baltimore Bachelor Offline
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Post: #415
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Getting dumped by someone with dreadlocks is especially hard because every time you see a mop, you get emotional.

My confidence is so high that I should probably trademark it
07-31-2019 09:01 AM
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Post: #416
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
(07-31-2019 09:01 AM)Baltimore Bachelor Wrote:  Getting dumped by someone with dreadlocks is especially hard because every time you see a mop, you get emotional.

Your joke wipes the floor with mine.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

http://inspiredentrepreneur.weebly.com/
07-31-2019 09:49 AM
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Post: #417
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
A man sees the doctor and the doctor says to him, I've got bad news, and worse news. The man says, well what's the bad news? The doctor says, you've only got 1 day to live. The man says, so what's the worse news? The doctor says, I've been trying to reach you for the last 24 hours.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

http://inspiredentrepreneur.weebly.com/
08-03-2019 03:19 PM
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Post: #418
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
---

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
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(This post was last modified: 08-03-2019 05:13 PM by PapayaTapper.)
08-03-2019 05:10 PM
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Rorogue Offline
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Post: #419
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
'Transgender male' shoots up college campus. He just wanted to know what it felt like to pull a hard thing out of his pants and shoot someone in the face with it.

Canadian-Iranian man freed from Iranian prison after 11 years of detention. Deported back to Iran immediately,after manspreading on Toronto airport shuttle.

ASAP Rocky jailed in Sweden for 'conduct against Swedish values'. Ie he was a minority who made his money from employment, and had sex there consensually.

News: Childless adults 'ruining' Disney World. Parents want them 'banned.'
Orlando zoo sees upsurge in 35 year old white female attendees.
Extra security needed outside Gorilla and Elephant cage.
(This post was last modified: 08-03-2019 11:34 PM by Rorogue.)
08-03-2019 11:32 PM
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Geomann180
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Post: #420
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Why did the hippie move from Seattle to Portland?

He heard there was less work down there.

Aloha!
08-05-2019 05:20 PM
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eradicator Offline
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Post: #421
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
A guy texts his neighbour:

Bob, I'm sorry. I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess . I have been helping myself to your wife when you're not around, probably more than you. I know it’s no excuse but I don't get it at home. I can't live with the guilt any longer. I hope you'll accept my sincerest apology. It won't happen again .

The man, feeling outrage and betrayed, grabs his gun, goes into the bedroom and without a word shoots his wife.

Moments later the guy gets a second text:

I really should use spell check!
That should be "wifi"... Sorry!

Team yoga pants
[video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UoeQOC-5iw&t=143s[/video]
08-05-2019 11:10 PM
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ThriceLazarus Offline
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Post: #422
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Simon, an upper-middle-class Jew, had the privilege to send his son to Israel - as is the privilege of all upper-middle-class Jews. Upon return, his son came to him ecstatic.

“Son, you’re full of joy! What happened at kibbutz to bring such a change?”

“Father, I’ve been saved - I found the Son of God and converted to Christianity!” Of course, Simon was shocked, betrayed, and in anguish he sent his son away.

Walking down the street, he came across a few friends - both of whom were dour in their countenance.

“Ben, Shlomo, I have the most terrible news...”

“Your son is a Christian? So is my daughter now, and Ben’s boy...”

The three men were shaken, and knew right then to take this issue to their Rabbi. And when they came to the temple, they found him with a cloud over his head.

“Has your son returned from Israel?” They asked. “A Christian soul!” Now they were terrified. How had this happened?! After much deliberation Simon realized only G-d could give him an answer.

So that night, Simon knealt at the edge of his bed and cried to the Lord. “Oh Lord! What has happened? I sent my son to Jerusalem and he returned a Christian!”

The sky rumbled, and cracked with thunder, before a booming voice rang down, “You know what? The same thing happened to me!”
08-11-2019 06:14 PM
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Josue Offline
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Post: #423
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Feminism
08-13-2019 08:19 PM
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Brodiaga Offline
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Post: #424
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution. "Let's have sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile. "Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again," said the necrophile. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it," said the pyromaniac. There was silence, and then the masochist said: "Meow."
08-13-2019 08:33 PM
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Dusty Offline
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Post: #425
RE: Let's have a laugh - share some jokes
Sometimes, I use big words I don't always fully understand in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

Take care of those titties for me.
08-17-2019 08:51 PM
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