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Moving vs adapting
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duedue Offline
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Post: #1
Moving vs adapting
Today I was talking to a game mentor and told him living in a small town the best place I've found for approaching girls is Walmart but it feels weired to go to walmart to find girls. He said "you've got to do what you've got to do or you can move somewhere else. you live only once."
After the conversation was finished something seems to awaken in me, like the guy in Matrix. But then isn't moving a kind of escape? I mean of course I'd love to live in a beautiful and cheap place with abundant sunshine and pretty well dressed feminine smiling and welcoming girls and having a variety of sources of passive income that let me focus on reading, my hobbies, working out, traveling and research. (I do the latter now but I need to do it for a living.)

I lived in Europe for about 5 years and even though I traveled while there quite a bit, most of my time there was wasted (depression, not having game, etc). Now that I think back, that period feels literally like a dream. And I tell myself the period I have now in the US may also end as fast as a dream without much gain (in terms of pleasure, resume, experiences etc). (For the record I'm an immigrant from a fucked up 3rd world country and that's the only citizenship or permanent residence I've got. It makes thing complicated in terms of (at least) mobility.)

So the message is that I'm not (and have not been) really living my life but is moving the best way go about it? As you see I've moved quite a bit already. I was reading Quintus's article on frame on ROK and he quotes Schopenhauer "The world is my idea". It seems to promote adjusting and taking advantage of what you've got over moving. I've recently been applying this in my job, trying to find projects I can collaborate on with more senior members even to the point of being pesky.
02-12-2017 03:32 PM
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Thomas the Rhymer Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Moving vs adapting
YoungMobileGlobal once said somewhere on this forum something that really informed me on this same topic, when I was going through a similar crisis.

I can't find the exact quote but it went something like:

If you are considering relocating, always do it because you have identified opportunities you want to seize. Never relocate because you want to get away from somewhere, because you want to escape. Relocate because you are chasing great opportunities.

So why do you want to move?

If you just want to escape having to chase chicks in walmart, then you are probably wanting to move for the wrong reasons.

If you have identified opportunities that are best actualised by moving to a new location, then those may be good, valid reasons; although, given the tendency of people to lie to themselves, you should still consult with some mentors who can warn you if the opportunities you have identified are stupid/false.

A beginner's guide to jobhunting and networking
02-12-2017 11:45 PM
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Svoboda Offline
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Post: #3
RE: Moving vs adapting
Quote:And I tell myself the period I have now in the US may also end as fast as a dream without much gain (in terms of pleasure, resume, experiences etc). (For the record I'm an immigrant from a fucked up 3rd world country and that's the only citizenship or permanent residence I've got. It makes thing complicated in terms of (at least) mobility.)

How long till you are eligible to become a US citizen?
04-05-2017 02:34 AM
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Fortis Away
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Post: #4
RE: Moving vs adapting
It depends, if you're escaping from NYC because you can't hack it, then I might consider that escapism. NYC has many opportunities for hustlers and millions of women for players. Of course, some people simply don't like some cities and that's OK too.

That said If you're from a small town where there are few women and few opportunities you'd have to be dumb to not get out of there if the option presents itself. My life improved significantly once I stepped outside of my dying city and into a thriving city.

I'm happier, have more money, more ideas, better health and more direction?

Did I "escape" or did I simply push myself to grow in a bigger environment?

I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
04-05-2017 03:08 AM
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YMD Offline
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Post: #5
RE: Moving vs adapting
(02-12-2017 03:32 PM)duedue Wrote:  (For the record I'm an immigrant from a fucked up 3rd world country and that's the only citizenship or permanent residence I've got. It makes thing complicated in terms of (at least) mobility.)

I've been in Australia as a foreign worker.
I have an aspiration to explore the world too (especially for meeting women). At the same time, I also want to get permanent residence here, which somewhat affects mobility.

(02-12-2017 03:32 PM)duedue Wrote:  ...is moving the best way go about it?

I think this is a question many of RVFers have asked themselves at least once.

Does this "moving" mean permanently expatriating to another country?
The most realistic action would be to spend 2-3 weeks abroad. Then, you can decide what "move" is the best move for you.

Also, the best move will depend on your age and financial status.
Are you a student? Then, how about finding a chance to live abroad for temporarily, like participating in an internship?
04-06-2017 03:41 AM
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