I'm Touring The United States! Starting in June, I'm conducting private events in 23 American cities. Click here for full details.

Post Reply 
How do you deal with depression and isolation?
Author Message
gework Offline
Alpha Male
****
Gold Member

Posts: 1,124
Joined: Apr 2017
Reputation: 64
Post: #101
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
When I was about 16 I noticed a lot of people were depressed and I made the decision that I would never be depressed. And I never have been. It's a question of willpower. You don't have to let your mind run away with itself - to let it run on auto-pilot. You can control it.

You find a lot of people posting online for help with depression. Though there is definitely a lot of useful knowledge you can find the tone of the posts is defeatist and they look outside for help. To solve depression you are going to have to look inside and rewire your perceptions and drive. People with depression treat it as a cop out - "I can't get out of bed because I am depressed." etc. is you completely surrendering yourself to negative thoughts and physiology, which are a feedback loop. The easy thing to do in life is languish on the flats in a stagnating puddle. You do nothing of any note. You have no goals. You have little to show for yourself. It's much harder to have the constant motivation to continually move into the foothills and mountains of life. And once you're there it's very easy to fall or get knocked back and then maybe slide back into the stagnant pools of the flats.

Also, once you have got into the hills and mountains, remaining in the same place could cause you to become depressed. Once you've reached goals they become the new plateau. They normalise very quickly. Keeping a positive mental state may require constant improvement and getting closer to goals. Though I think you can also change your perceptions to value other things in life that don't require constant moving forward and appreciate what you have got.
04-27-2017 04:34 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 3 users Like gework's post:
newbeginning, Built to Fade, Syberpunk
Phanes Offline
Game Denialist

Posts: 52
Joined: Feb 2019
Reputation: 0
Post: #102
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
@gework

That's a good attitude.

People that are depressed may have a lower amount of dopamine which controls motivation. If you have a low enough amount of dopamine you just can't get up.

I have depression and I am spending 12-13 hours in bed per day. Which of course makes me even more depressed. I managed to go about three weeks with 8 hours per day until I had an argument with a friend and now I sled deeper into depression.

I live on savings and I am self-studying software development in a library. I got to bed at 11:30 pm and have an alarm app that goes off at 7:30 that forces me to go outside and scan a barcode to make it stop. This works great for getting me out of bed. But then I feel so bad I just want to return to bed again, and I do. I just want the bad feelings to go away. I am supposed to get up, make the bed, splash my face with water, drink some water, make and have breakfast, write a positive journal (to change my feelings to the better in the morning) and write down the agenda for the day. I do all these things except after going to bed again.

What can I do guys? Tonight I am trying advice from a ROK article by Roosh to visualize yourself getting up except I am visualising myself getting up, doing my routine and going to the library without going back to bed again.
04-24-2019 02:57 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 1 user Likes Phanes's post:
debeguiled
Tinder Scientist Offline
Beta Orbiter
*

Posts: 133
Joined: Dec 2018
Reputation: 0
Post: #103
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
(04-24-2019 02:57 PM)Phanes Wrote:  @gework

That's a good attitude.

People that are depressed may have a lower amount of dopamine which controls motivation. If you have a low enough amount of dopamine you just can't get up.

I have depression and I am spending 12-13 hours in bed per day. Which of course makes me even more depressed. I managed to go about three weeks with 8 hours per day until I had an argument with a friend and now I sled deeper into depression.

I live on savings and I am self-studying software development in a library. I got to bed at 11:30 pm and have an alarm app that goes off at 7:30 that forces me to go outside and scan a barcode to make it stop. This works great for getting me out of bed. But then I feel so bad I just want to return to bed again, and I do. I just want the bad feelings to go away. I am supposed to get up, make the bed, splash my face with water, drink some water, make and have breakfast, write a positive journal (to change my feelings to the better in the morning) and write down the agenda for the day. I do all these things except after going to bed again.

What can I do guys? Tonight I am trying advice from a ROK article by Roosh to visualize yourself getting up except I am visualising myself getting up, doing my routine and going to the library without going back to bed again.

Phanes I know you probably heard it before but I can tell you from experience self improvement goes a long way towards helping depression.

Start with the basics:

Sleeping Well
Eating healthier
Exercising

You should stick to a routine where you try to accomplish something small everyday. When I was at my worst I just tried to do the basic stuff like cleaning my room, doing laundry,etc. That at least made me feel like my entire day didn't go to waste.

Also working on how you look can do wonders since you have something to look forward everyday and naturally feel better when you look at yourself in the mirror (Get a haircut, get on a skin care routine if you need one, buy some better clothes,etc).

The problem you have right now is perhaps too much free time, find something to commit to that takes 5-6 hours of your day at least.
(This post was last modified: 04-24-2019 05:02 PM by Tinder Scientist.)
04-24-2019 05:02 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 2 users Like Tinder Scientist's post:
debeguiled, arafat scarf
debeguiled Offline
Innovative Casanova
*******
Gold Member

Posts: 6,850
Joined: Aug 2014
Reputation: 111
Post: #104
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
(04-24-2019 02:57 PM)Phanes Wrote:  @gework

That's a good attitude.

People that are depressed may have a lower amount of dopamine which controls motivation. If you have a low enough amount of dopamine you just can't get up.

I have depression and I am spending 12-13 hours in bed per day. Which of course makes me even more depressed. I managed to go about three weeks with 8 hours per day until I had an argument with a friend and now I sled deeper into depression.

I live on savings and I am self-studying software development in a library. I got to bed at 11:30 pm and have an alarm app that goes off at 7:30 that forces me to go outside and scan a barcode to make it stop. This works great for getting me out of bed. But then I feel so bad I just want to return to bed again, and I do. I just want the bad feelings to go away. I am supposed to get up, make the bed, splash my face with water, drink some water, make and have breakfast, write a positive journal (to change my feelings to the better in the morning) and write down the agenda for the day. I do all these things except after going to bed again.

What can I do guys? Tonight I am trying advice from a ROK article by Roosh to visualize yourself getting up except I am visualising myself getting up, doing my routine and going to the library without going back to bed again.

Therapy and anti-depressants helped me. I had a major depressive disorder and limped in to see a counselor expecting nothing but the worst.

I got on Wellbutrin and stayed on it for two years. I still felt bad but it wasn't the crippling kind of bad. It was like the tension I carried around me in my body all the time was being artificially relaxed, but I would take any kind of relaxation I could get.

Found a great therapist who just listened sympathetically for a year and pretty soon it was the only bright spot in my week.

Having an objective but caring person to help really changed things, and eventually I got off the anti-depressants and am feeling much better now.

A book by Tim Lott called "The Scent of Dried Roses" helped too:

https://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-68157...pid1773692

I know it feels like nothing will ever get better and it is pointless to do anything about it, so I won't blow anything up your you know what.

If you can do it, drag yourself to a therapist and see what your options are, even though it feels like none of them are good.

Needless to say, you might not get a good one at first, and if you get bad vibes, get out of there. It will feel like this confirms your sense of hopelessness and you will never want to try that again. So go back to bed and later down the line, if you feel you can, try another therapist.

Good luck and you will be in my thoughts and prayers and feel free to pm me.

“The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of its parents.”

Carl Jung
(This post was last modified: 04-25-2019 12:09 PM by debeguiled.)
04-25-2019 12:05 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 2 users Like debeguiled's post:
Dream Medicine, Syberpunk
Hombre de hielo Offline
Game Denialist

Posts: 51
Joined: Feb 2019
Reputation: 0
Post: #105
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
Depression means that reality is not meeting your expectations. Only that!
04-26-2019 09:14 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Sooth Offline
Alpha Male
****
Gold Member

Posts: 1,116
Joined: Feb 2015
Reputation: 14
Post: #106
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
Get a job as a courier driver.

Everyone is always happy to see you, you have responsibility, you get exercise. Was one of the most enjoyable jobs I'eve ever had and just straight up made me happy.
04-26-2019 09:35 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 1 user Likes Sooth's post:
Syberpunk
AOC's Missing Boyfriend Offline
Banned

Posts: 103
Joined: Mar 2019
Post: #107
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
Limit exposure to the internet and get out of the house.

Regular exercise, regular sleeping and waking times and having social events penciled in every week helps too.

If you are in a NEET situation, work or school is something that you need to get into ASAP.
04-27-2019 01:04 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 3 users Like AOC's Missing Boyfriend's post:
PantyPeeler, partyfowl, Syberpunk
PantyPeeler Online
Game Denialist

Posts: 74
Joined: Apr 2019
Reputation: 0
Post: #108
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
(04-27-2019 01:04 AM)AOCs Missing Boyfriend Wrote:  Limit exposure to the internet and get out of the house.

Regular exercise, regular sleeping and waking times and having social events penciled in every week helps too.

If you are in a NEET situation, work or school is something that you need to get into ASAP.

Anytime I allow myself to stagnate it seems like any small slight will go around and around in my head and make me feel like shit after a while.

Keeping busy with work and things I truly enjoy, I find, is the best way to not be easily offended by trivial shit.

A lot of excellent advice in this thread and others.

To be mentally strong you must accept life’s difficulties, we all have doubts, fears and challenges. How you approach them will determine your outcome. - Miyamoto Musashi
05-01-2019 05:41 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[-] The following 2 users Like PantyPeeler's post:
partyfowl, Syberpunk
partyfowl Offline
Beta Orbiter
*

Posts: 136
Joined: Apr 2019
Reputation: 1
Post: #109
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
Find a meet space community. I recommend your local church, the smaller the better since they're always less cucked. Be genuine if you do this as people can see through a fake convert.
05-01-2019 05:47 PM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Atom89 Offline
Beta Orbiter
*

Posts: 98
Joined: Oct 2015
Reputation: 1
Post: #110
RE: How do you deal with depression and isolation?
I get in touch with people.

I also try to read, watch something interesting.

I also go out, take walks.
05-07-2019 10:31 AM
Find all posts by this user Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply 


Possibly Related Threads...
Thread: Author Replies: Views: Last Post
  Is isolation the right move? sonderho 8 2,583 03-01-2017 04:20 PM
Last Post: augen sehen
  Depression newpua 15 6,014 06-20-2016 07:21 AM
Last Post: Ballr
  Broke up. Now all time low of depression Ruivinho 39 14,853 12-02-2015 12:39 AM
Last Post: Jesus Christ

Forum Jump:


User(s) browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)

Contact Us | RooshV.com | Return to Top | Return to Content | Mobile Version | RSS Syndication