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LTR/Marriage master thread. The why, who, when, where and how.
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Apu Offline
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Post: #76
RE: LTR/Marriage master thread. The why, who, when, where and how.
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(This post was last modified: 02-11-2019 01:58 AM by Apu.)
02-11-2019 01:31 AM
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Investment Bro Offline
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Post: #77
RE: LTR/Marriage master thread. The why, who, when, where and how.
Gentlemen, how do you maintain frame in an LTR or marriage over time?

Looking forward to the discussion.

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02-18-2019 12:20 PM
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TheMaleBrain Offline
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Post: #78
RE: LTR/Marriage master thread. The why, who, when, where and how.
(02-18-2019 12:20 PM)Investment Bro Wrote:  Gentlemen, how do you maintain frame in an LTR or marriage over time?

Looking forward to the discussion.

That's an obvious one.

I currently have 2 MLTRs: the first has been around for 4 years and the second 2 years.
They don't live with me (obviously).

I make the effort to maintain frame, as much as possible.
I noticed (with the first) that if you let your guard down long enough you start getting drama.

Case in point:
A month ago #1 was switching work place. This caused her anxiety. She started "using me as an emotional tampon" to the point that she contemplated not having sex on our meeting (that is a must since we've been dating and "is allowed" only on special circumstances). That was because she "felt that she only needed to talk". I, knowing that tomorrow I would be meeting #2, told her it is fine by me.
She exploded and after several minutes I soft nexted her over the weekend. She called me after the weekend and all was back to normal.

This happens every few months (not the exact same scenario).

When I was married, I was blue pill and of course I did not maintain frame.

How to maintain frame:
1. Establish acceptable behaviors - even if there is an objection.
2. Soft next or punish otherwise when boundaries are passed.
3. Keep the same frame by : using pet name, assertion of dominance as a rule ("We'll be going out to place X"), make her cum every time.

I bet others have more on the subject.

"I love a fulfilling and sexual relationship. That is why I make the effort to have many of those" - TheMaleBrain
"Now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb." - Spaceballs
"If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine" - Obi-Wan Kenobi
Yesterday 05:58 AM
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GibsMeDat Offline
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Post: #79
RE: LTR/Marriage master thread. The why, who, when, where and how.
Does an LTR quality girl care how many women you have slept with? Even if you don't tell her, she may find out. Will that turn her off you?
Yesterday 11:58 AM
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Leonard D Neubache Offline
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Post: #80
RE: LTR/Marriage master thread. The why, who, when, where and how.
If she doesn't raise the issue then there's not much you can do about it.

If she does raise the issue then you can ask her if she'd rather be with a guy that can't even figure out how to work her bra strap (obviously not a go-to line if you still have trouble with bra straps).

Over a longer course you can ask her "are you a notch or are you a keeper?"

She's obviously going to want to be a keeper.

"Lucky you. They lost and you won. Feel free to gloat if you run into one."

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
(This post was last modified: Yesterday 12:07 PM by Leonard D Neubache.)
Yesterday 12:05 PM
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Laner Offline
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Post: #81
RE: LTR/Marriage master thread. The why, who, when, where and how.
(02-18-2019 12:20 PM)Investment Bro Wrote:  Gentlemen, how do you maintain frame in an LTR or marriage over time?

Looking forward to the discussion.

Depends on the situation, but I will take control over all aspects of our lives and then direct roles from there. When she does her role well, I make sure to acknowledge her growing mastery. When she fucks up, look her hard in the eye and tell her to stop making such a big deal about it, and that 'we' will figure it out. This gives her confidence that her mistakes have a backstop, and that I will always have the upper hand. At this point, I rely on my wife to such an extent that I would have to hire two or three people to replace her if she died, in order to continue to live my life as I do now.

Women don't really like making decisions, as they don't like screwing up. Anyone who works with them can attest to this, which is why most cling to government jobs where there is zero accountability.

Women who are comfortable fucking up tend to have higher risk jobs and are the bread and butter of booty calls and bar bathroom bangs. Not the kind of woman you would be marrying.
Yesterday 01:10 PM
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