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Tired of dating, how normal is it?
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luigi Offline
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Tired of dating, how normal is it?
Im 32, muscular and good looking. Have banged about 55-60 girls.

Im getting bored of dating. Having to meet a girl at a place, wait for her to arrive, telling my history for the 100th time and listening to theirs like if i give a shit, just to bang them. Losing my time and money for the ultimate goal which is sex with a random girl that i will delete from my life after im done with her.

Because thats how i see women right now. Beings that are only made for sex. I always believed in unicorn women to have a relationship with and build a family. But no, theres no unicorns. The few that look good will mess your life one way or another sooner or later, its just a matter of time and for the ideal conditions to arrive. The more years pass the more sure i am about this.

Im sometimes waiting for my date and in my mind im praying that they will come up with a last minute excuse to not come, just so i can go back home and skip what will probably be another date that ends up (or not) in average sex.

I see this MGTOW thing about not marrying, just having women for casual sex and nothing else... well im one step further, i can just tard when the need comes and im completely free for a while of one of the animal basic needs. All my time and money can go somewhere else.

I sometimes ask myself if asexual people are actually lucky, its like having a primal need removed... a life without sex, like a life without having to breathe or drink, if you think about it, it can be an advantage. Most betas devote their lifes to pussy and thats why girls are how they are nowadays.

Well having said this... how normal is not being in the mood of dating even if its easy for you? Is it just a phase and i will move on? Should i give dating a break for a while? Maybe im stressed?

Just to be clear, im hetero, please skip certain cheesy comments.
(This post was last modified: 03-18-2019 11:32 AM by luigi.)
03-18-2019 11:30 AM
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Investment Bro Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
Ironically, right before I met my current LTR I had thought the same thing.

My friend, what you are experiencing is player burn out. It's time to take a sabbatical.

It sounds like you may be using online dating, and if that's the case it's time to take a break. Nothing is more soul-sucking and lifeless than hitting the app grind. Don't get me wrong, they have their place, but not in the long term game formula.

What are you doing right now in your life that is exciting? What are your goals? Are you working towards them? Have you traveled at all recently?

Women do not fill up your cup in the same way that your goals, dreams, philosophy, and personal projects do. Dating women is a time suck, and with the exception of the very best women, I would argue that it doesn't add a tremendous amount of value to your life.

With that being said, here's what I did when I was in your position last.

1: All dating apps got deleted off my phone. If I wanted to get laid, I would have to go out. However, I made a promise to only go out for fun, not go out looking to pull and get laid. The mindset difference is everything. This is how I ended up meeting my LTR.

2: I went back to the drawing board and remapped out my goals for this year, and revisited my action plan for achieving them. Going balls to the wall on personally salient goals was a refreshing breath of fresh air. I felt more satisfied completing each step than I did blasting openers on Hinge/Tinder, or even after netting a new pull.

3: Stopped jerking off. You want your motivation to approach to go through the roof? Check the thread out in the Life Forum.

4: Regained my sense of curiosity. As a man, it is important to be curious about the world and your place in it. Slaying lots of poontang takes man away from his natural curiosity. Go ahead and indulge that now. Whether that's travel, reading, or just taking a walk in nature, make the time to expand your mental horizons. It'll give you plenty more to talk about on dates, when you eventually start going on them again.

5: Lift harder than ever. I'm sure you're on a good split right now. Do you have gym goals? Take them to the next level.

If you can do all 5 of these over the course of a month or so, I can promise you will be ready to get back after some quality tail. It's great to take a sabbatical because it puts everything into context - namely that women are only a part of your life and not your whole life.

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03-18-2019 12:10 PM
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luigi Offline
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RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
(03-18-2019 12:10 PM)Investment Bro Wrote:  Ironically, right before I met my current LTR I had thought the same thing.

My friend, what you are experiencing is player burn out. It's time to take a sabbatical.

It sounds like you may be using online dating, and if that's the case it's time to take a break. Nothing is more soul-sucking and lifeless than hitting the app grind. Don't get me wrong, they have their place, but not in the long term game formula.

What are you doing right now in your life that is exciting? What are your goals? Are you working towards them? Have you traveled at all recently?

Women do not fill up your cup in the same way that your goals, dreams, philosophy, and personal projects do. Dating women is a time suck, and with the exception of the very best women, I would argue that it doesn't add a tremendous amount of value to your life.

With that being said, here's what I did when I was in your position last.

1: All dating apps got deleted off my phone. If I wanted to get laid, I would have to go out. However, I made a promise to only go out for fun, not go out looking to pull and get laid. The mindset difference is everything. This is how I ended up meeting my LTR.

2: I went back to the drawing board and remapped out my goals for this year, and revisited my action plan for achieving them. Going balls to the wall on personally salient goals was a refreshing breath of fresh air. I felt more satisfied completing each step than I did blasting openers on Hinge/Tinder, or even after netting a new pull.

3: Stopped jerking off. You want your motivation to approach to go through the roof? Check the thread out in the Life Forum.

4: Regained my sense of curiosity. As a man, it is important to be curious about the world and your place in it. Slaying lots of poontang takes man away from his natural curiosity. Go ahead and indulge that now. Whether that's travel, reading, or just taking a walk in nature, make the time to expand your mental horizons. It'll give you plenty more to talk about on dates, when you eventually start going on them again.

5: Lift harder than ever. I'm sure you're on a good split right now. Do you have gym goals? Take them to the next level.

If you can do all 5 of these over the course of a month or so, I can promise you will be ready to get back after some quality tail. It's great to take a sabbatical because it puts everything into context - namely that women are only a part of your life and not your whole life.

I actually took a 10 week break, but i think i will make a longer one, at least until summer. I live on an island and things get very "international" on touristic season.

Thank you for your words and your time.
(This post was last modified: 03-18-2019 12:20 PM by luigi.)
03-18-2019 12:19 PM
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MikeS Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
Happens regularly to me (I'm 42, didn't really start "dating" until mid 30s, back in my original home country I mostly met women through clubs - when I was younger - and bars and private parties).
I'll date a lot for a few months, and if don't happen to get into a short term relationship I'll need a break for a month or two, as the repetition wears me down. Maybe extroverts have an easier time dealing with all those first and second dates, having essentially the same conversations with women of varying interest (and yes, I've attempted more exciting "first date bangs" but only pulled it off once here in Bulgaria, unlike my past history in Scandinavia of mostly one-night-stands or relationships started under such circumstances).
At my age the three years LTR I was in until relatively recently felt like a wonderful respite from almost a lifetime of being "on the hunt".
03-18-2019 02:19 PM
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RatInTheWoods Offline
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Post: #5
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
Luigi, if you hate it, change it.

Stop destroying your soul with sluts.

From now on, only date high quality, LTR women. filter and vet them carefully. Save your sexual energy up.

Make a rule to date them 5 times before sex, and to next them first sign of any red flag.

You may be single for a while, but at least your next relationship will be quality.
03-18-2019 03:42 PM
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tomzestatlu Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
I am in the same situation.
I think it´s the combination of above-average notch count and being red pilled about women. But redpill is bitter...

"Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people."
03-18-2019 03:55 PM
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monsquid Offline
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Post: #7
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
More like blackpill. I find myself extremely cynical towards all women except my mother. While I find younger women in their early 20s physically attractive it wears on me to have inane conversations that don't go anywhere. Older women are sometimes more entertaining and fun to be around but unless they are exceptional I'm not sexually attracted. Finding that perfect balance of late 20s girl who is interesting and attractive is like finding a needle in a haystack.

"So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
03-18-2019 08:19 PM
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Delta Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
Totally normal. Why do you think there's all this talk around the red pill community about going NoFap to "motivate yourself?" Because unless you make yourself stupidly horny, spending time with vapid hoes just doesn't sound very appealing.

I second RatInTheWoods; as long as you're feeling this way, only bother with LTR quality girls. Don't waste your valuable energy on something you're not really into.
03-18-2019 10:25 PM
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flyinghorse Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
I had a similar thing 6 months ago. I just took 4 or 5 months off and it did me the world of good.

The thing is we're in our 30s, we've already slept with a ton of women, and sleeping with a new girl every week isn't exciting anymore.

All we can do is focus on what does excite us from now on.

We don't have to disregard women - just put them on the backburner and wait to see if you feel compelled to get back out there again.
03-18-2019 10:53 PM
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Post: #10
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
It happens, especially as you get older. I just turned 30 and, as I wrote in another thread, I'm extremely tired of running game and meeting new people. Whenever I'm out at a bar drinking, I usually find myself wanting to go home and be alone.

I'll still go out to see friends or host things, but going out strictly to run game is not on my agenda anymore.
03-18-2019 10:56 PM
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luigi Offline
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RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
(03-18-2019 03:42 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  Luigi, if you hate it, change it.

Stop destroying your soul with sluts.

From now on, only date high quality, LTR women. filter and vet them carefully. Save your sexual energy up.

Make a rule to date them 5 times before sex, and to next them first sign of any red flag.

You may be single for a while, but at least your next relationship will be quality.

I really would like that, its been a few years already since i prefer LTR more than casual dates.

I filter well, but when i get to know them, most of them are just one more clone. Contrary to when i was 10 years younger now I very rarely feel the spark and if it happens it ends up in unrequited love. This happens to me usually once or twice a year.

I will sound misogynistic, but cant see the difference between sluts and quality women anymore.

(03-18-2019 08:19 PM)monsquid Wrote:  More like blackpill. I find myself extremely cynical towards all women except my mother. While I find younger women in their early 20s physically attractive it wears on me to have inane conversations that don't go anywhere. Older women are sometimes more entertaining and fun to be around but unless they are exceptional I'm not sexually attracted. Finding that perfect balance of late 20s girl who is interesting and attractive is like finding a needle in a haystack.

"So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald

lol exactly
(This post was last modified: 03-19-2019 02:43 AM by luigi.)
03-19-2019 02:29 AM
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Post: #12
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
(03-18-2019 08:19 PM)monsquid Wrote:  While I find younger women in their early 20s physically attractive it wears on me to have inane conversations that don't go anywhere. Older women are sometimes more entertaining and fun to be around but unless they are exceptional I'm not sexually attracted. Finding that perfect balance of late 20s girl who is interesting and attractive is like finding a needle in a haystack.

I find 20s something students the best mix.
They are still fresh and not totally spoiled by life - with some exceptional hobbies and interests.
Older females they are in the husband/boyfriend search mode.
Most of their friends are already married so there is this huge pressure and most of the time the only hobbies that they have got are Netflix and wine - boring as fuck.

But yep agree try to aim for better quality - maybe join some clubs like skydiving, scuba diving or some extreme sports you can get really interesting personalities there with passion and interesting life.
03-19-2019 04:08 AM
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luigi Offline
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RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
(03-19-2019 04:08 AM)Pytonga Wrote:  
(03-18-2019 08:19 PM)monsquid Wrote:  While I find younger women in their early 20s physically attractive it wears on me to have inane conversations that don't go anywhere. Older women are sometimes more entertaining and fun to be around but unless they are exceptional I'm not sexually attracted. Finding that perfect balance of late 20s girl who is interesting and attractive is like finding a needle in a haystack.

I find 20s something students the best mix.
They are still fresh and not totally spoiled by life - with some exceptional hobbies and interests.
Older females they are in the husband/boyfriend search mode.
Most of their friends are already married so there is this huge pressure and most of the time the only hobbies that they have got are Netflix and wine - boring as fuck.

But yep agree try to aim for better quality - maybe join some clubs like skydiving, scuba diving or some extreme sports you can get really interesting personalities there with passion and interesting life.

Here girls on early 20's may be hotter, but they are sooo dumb. Im 32 and feel a big gap, too immature to have something serious. Also they are prone to cheating or dump you so they can "live life", which means fucking as much as they can until they are 30, thats when the clock ticks and they want any retard that will get them pregnant.

I think the best age range here for LTR is from 25 to 28 max.

Anyways in my case i prefer a woman that doesnt look hyperactive.
(This post was last modified: 03-19-2019 05:02 AM by luigi.)
03-19-2019 04:55 AM
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Post: #14
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
I can relate to some extent, I've also been in the situation where it feels like its all a loop playing on repeat. There is a couple of solutions though

1) Mix things up, the way you meet and connect with women. Meet / date them in different ways and/or talk about different things. Ask yourself how you can make the situation better.

2) Take a break and focus on yourself a bit, reading, making money or whatever project you want to pursue.

3) I think one advice that people dont give often enough because its so simple is just to try and have fun. Dating and getting girls is supposed to be fun, otherwise whats the purpose of doing it?
03-19-2019 05:56 PM
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RatInTheWoods Offline
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Post: #15
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
(03-19-2019 02:29 AM)luigi Wrote:  I really would like that, its been a few years already since i prefer LTR more than casual dates.

I know how you feel mate, its a brutal, shallow market out there, with overpriced, damaged goods over inflated by male thirst.

Take a break and focus on just having fun without women in your life for a while.
03-19-2019 07:09 PM
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UnW Offline
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Post: #16
RE: Tired of dating, how normal is it?
It's normal to have player burnout, I personally take a break when this happens, focus on one or two regular girls and focus on other areas of my life (Learn new Skills, Business, Travel, Fitness)
(03-18-2019 11:30 AM)luigi Wrote:  I sometimes ask myself if asexual people are actually lucky, its like having a primal need removed... a life without sex, like a life without having to breathe or drink, if you think about it, it can be an advantage. Most betas devote their lifes to pussy and thats why girls are how they are nowadays.
It's funny, I had the same thought over the years too when I've been burnt out. It's a double edged sword, it motivates you but also can consume a lot of time if you let it.
03-21-2019 08:33 PM
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