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Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
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yankeetravels Online
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Post: #26
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
Just from one 25 y/o to another, I wanna throw my hat in the ring. OP looks to be like me and grew up in the US, that can make you pretty depressed about marriage prospects. We are arguably the most individually minded country on earth. So I think the others need to lay off OP a bit on him considering waiting to have children. I know a lot of guys on this forum at least 10 years older with no kids yet, so it's a bit hypocritical.

For notches, other dudes here have gotten the idea of quality over quantity in my head, but there's still an urge young guys fight off I think for this, considering we will never have this much energy for sex again. There's a FOMO with our youth. Our 20's are important years, so most of us will want to have spent these wisely. Whether that's building up a career, devoting time to connect with a future wife, fuck as many women as we can, or even traveling the world.

I've started a similar thread as you for my coming of age scenario. That being to put myself logistically better in a single life city or stay put and build a savings. I chose the latter this year, but the former is really barking in my head to act soon, because deep down I know I'm running out of time. OP, do you want to travel at all? Do you want a wife outside the US? If so, this will probably take a few extra years and you may have to sacrifice career projection. These are things I've thought about myself, and I'm personally considering sacrificing career projection in favor of seeing new places and eventually doing some wife hunting abroad. I just can't see my future wife being in America.

I don't know how you feel about all that, but that should be something you consider that you didn't mention. I agree with the sentiment about there being a clock for men to settle down too, especially now. I'm thinking I realistically have about 10 years to get married, if that, before I'm the male equivalent of the crazy 30's lady that realizes she's facing the wall. But, marriage is a big gamble man. It scares me half to death with the consequences of it going wrong, but it is the foundation of what we believe the world should be at the same time. A lot can go through a young man's head with all the forks in the road he still has to face.

As far back as I could remember, I always wanted to be a player.

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04-09-2019 07:12 AM
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Post: #27
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
Yankee, the problem here is that the OP started this thread asking for some advice as to how to move forward as a 25 year old but when he received advice and information that ran counter to what he thought he would hear or what he really wanted to hear, he got defensive. Bgbusiness wanted to hear that you can still be a player in your late 30s and continue that lifestyle indefinitely and be happy doing so. He wanted to hear that men universally age like a vintage wine instead of the vinegar most dudes become in reality. Now I suppose if one really wanted to, one could keep the player lifestyle going. I know a few guys in their late 30s and guys at my age in their 50s living the player lifestyle so I know it can be done. Problem with these dudes though is that the quality of the pussy they get is shit. They ain't running through playboy models or even formerly good looking women who have aged well that's for sure. My one friend is almost 50 and is very wealthy, never married, has a super baller pad (his front door to his pad is an elevator that goes up and opens into his place) and he's bragging to me about these girls he's banging but they're all older chicks, closer to us in age. I call them his botox babes. No thanks to that, he can have them.

My advice to young guys is to seek quality over quantity, all day, any day. Sticking your dick in crazy or fattie or cunty just because you can, just because it's there for the taking is destroying a lot of young men. Just like women lose their ability to bond after too many partners, the same happens to young men when they put their dicks in too many bad places. You end up thinking all women are shit. You end up thinking that you, yourself, are shit. Just like it is said that you are the average of 10 of the closest people you hang out with, I believe you can extend this and say that most dudes are the average of the chicks they've fucked. Most guys these days are banging too much dog shit and as such, most dudes these days are not much to behold. If nothing else gets listened to here, I think that guys need to go after quality, not quantity, especially when you get over 25. You should be maturing and growing enough as a man to attract a better class of women after 25. Your game should be about attracting the best chicks, not the most chicks. Those two things are not remotely the same and require different styles of game ( yes there is some overlap between the two styles no doubt). Being married in this day and age is hard, which is all the more reason for the need to be discerning and knowing how to attract quality. Most guys don't however and end up with slim pickings once they get into their mid to late 30s.

Yankee, you're most certainly not running out of time, you're at a good age but you do need to have a plan in place and work towards fulfilling it because if you are where you are now at age 35, you won't be very satisfied. That is the problem for most guys your age, they don't have any vision for their futures and end up winging it for too long without any direction. You can't be that guy.
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 04:24 PM by doc holliday.)
04-09-2019 04:22 PM
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bgbusiness Away
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Post: #28
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 06:21 AM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Yeah. Ignore me.

Will do.

(04-09-2019 06:21 AM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Your physical smv dropped two points in the last 8 years and your income is nothing special but in 45 years you're bound to be a billionaire president married to an Eastern European model.

I have the potential to become a millionaire in five years as my investments are doing way better than I thought they would.
My SMV only dropped because I couldn't keep up with my school, it was pretty competitive and my income is high for my age.

Judging on how your future is going to plan out based on your past is such a victim mentality. You seem super pessimistic, please have some hope in your life. Life is going to throw a lot of curve balls as you already know, did your negative mindset help you with those situations?

(04-09-2019 06:21 AM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  There's not many 40 year old dudes here who are singing the praises of spending 20 years chasing money and sluts.

I didn't say I will keep chasing girls at the age of 40.
I said I might marry when I am 40. There is a difference. I might even marry in late 30s.
Please read carefully.

With all due respect, I admire your input, but I don't think there is much consistency and logic in your feedback..
I am not trying to put you on the spot, but your lifestyle seem to not fit into mine and that's completely fine.
I am sure you are as happy as you can be in your own world and not everyone is the same.

I can sense the anger in you for some reason, experiencing hardship with your family Leo?

"Chase a check, never chase a bitch."
- Future

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."
- Heat

"That's the difference between you and me. You wanna lose small, I wanna win big."
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 04:46 PM by bgbusiness.)
04-09-2019 04:35 PM
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bgbusiness Away
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Post: #29
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 04:22 PM)doc holliday Wrote:  Bgbusiness wanted to hear that you can still be a player in your late 30s and continue that lifestyle indefinitely and be happy doing so. He wanted to hear that men universally age like a vintage wine instead of the vinegar most dudes become in reality.

No, I said I will stop around 40.
I know I would have to take care of myself if I want to have high SMV in 30s and 40s, I mentioned that before.

"Chase a check, never chase a bitch."
- Future

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."
- Heat

"That's the difference between you and me. You wanna lose small, I wanna win big."
04-09-2019 05:01 PM
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rungoodinc Offline
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Post: #30
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
Take care of your health, keep investing and always have a few chicks in the rotation if you are single. You can't plan for everything too much, you will change with every passing year and your values and goals will be different as a result. But make sure you are maintaining all aspects of your life and that none are neglected. I spent 3 years of my 20s chasing tail and while I had a great time and got the experience with women I was looking for, it definitely set me back financially.
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 05:21 PM by rungoodinc.)
04-09-2019 05:18 PM
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Thrill Jackson Offline
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Post: #31
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
A good rule of thumb is the half + 7 rule.

"Half age plus seven rule: In dating/romantic/intimate relationships, the age of the younger person should not be less than half the age of the older person plus seven years." (source: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:...p-rule.svg )

[Image: 567px-Half-age-plus-seven-relationship-rule.svg.png]

22yr old male-> 18yr old chicks
23yr old male-> 18.5yr old chick
24yr old male-> 19yr old chick
25yr old male -> 19.5yr old chick

etc.


As many have stated on this thread you don't want to start a marriage with a chick when she is 25+ years old.

More likely to be jaded from too many cocks and the milk is starting too sour up.

Waiting until you're 35 will leave with broads who are right around the 25 year mark.

That's pushing your luck. I would pump the brakes on the player train to around 29-30yrs old and then really focus on quality over quantity.

Growth Over Everything Else.
04-09-2019 06:06 PM
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Post: #32
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 05:01 PM)bgbusiness Wrote:  
(04-09-2019 04:22 PM)doc holliday Wrote:  Bgbusiness wanted to hear that you can still be a player in your late 30s and continue that lifestyle indefinitely and be happy doing so. He wanted to hear that men universally age like a vintage wine instead of the vinegar most dudes become in reality.

No, I said I will stop around 40.
I know I would have to take care of myself if I want to have high SMV in 30s and 40s, I mentioned that before.

So then what at age 40? Settle down with a nice 37 year old? Oh but wait, your SMV will only be climbing at that age so you're gonna be in line to snag a nice 23 yr old to marry right? Look man, I'm not trying to give you a hard time or be an ass towards you, I'm just trying to get guys like you to face some facts. You may be the grand exception to the rule and get the beautiful young woman to marry at age 40 but the odds are against you. The vast majority of sub 25 women or even the 25-30 age range (which I actually happen to like) will not seriously date a guy that age. That's not to say guys that age can't date younger girls and I know one 50 yr old dude who married a nice 30 yr old, but generally speaking:

a) it will likely not be anything serious enough and you'll be her plate until a more suitable guy closer to her in age appears or b) you'll be stuck with some messed up chick with daddy issues that you'd be stupid as hell to try and wife up or c) you'll be with a young chick looking for a sugar daddy arrangement. Again, not a good scenario.

You can do what you want with this perspective and you may very well buck this reality like the example of that guy I gave above but your peak in terms of finding a nice young chick with long term potential will likely come in your late 20s and early 30s. That's why I think guys your age should focus on quality not quantity but most guys just want notches with shit women. They then wake up one day after they turn 40 and wonder why their lives are such a train wreck.
04-09-2019 06:40 PM
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Ouroboros Offline
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Post: #33
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 04:22 PM)doc holliday Wrote:  My advice to young guys is to seek quality over quantity, all day, any day. Sticking your dick in crazy or fattie or cunty just because you can, just because it's there for the taking is destroying a lot of young men. Just like women lose their ability to bond after too many partners, the same happens to young men when they put their dicks in too many bad places. You end up thinking all women are shit. You end up thinking that you, yourself, are shit. Just like it is said that you are the average of 10 of the closest people you hang out with, I believe you can extend this and say that most dudes are the average of the chicks they've fucked. Most guys these days are banging too much dog shit and as such, most dudes these days are not much to behold. If nothing else gets listened to here, I think that guys need to go after quality, not quantity, especially when you get over 25. You should be maturing and growing enough as a man to attract a better class of women after 25. Your game should be about attracting the best chicks, not the most chicks. Those two things are not remotely the same and require different styles of game ( yes there is some overlap between the two styles no doubt). Being married in this day and age is hard, which is all the more reason for the need to be discerning and knowing how to attract quality. Most guys don't however and end up with slim pickings once they get into their mid to late 30s.

Do you see any value in chasing notches for a limited amount of time, up to a moderate level (say 10-25), for the sake of developing your confidence/game/social skills/knowledge of women?

Although it may be out of vogue on the forum right now, I think it is at least useful to acquire new flags, so that you know what is out there, and you understand that the women you encounter at home do not necessarily reflect the global norm. If you're on the lookout for a lifetime partner it's useful to know that not all sexual marketplaces are alike, and some might suit you better than others.
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 08:08 PM by Ouroboros.)
04-09-2019 07:15 PM
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Post: #34
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
Bg, I wouldn’t wait until 40 to get married. I know you’re not ready now, but at least move the goal post to 35-37.

If you want a western wife, you’re gonna have to marry a lot sooner than that. Maybe before 30. Despite what the SMV chart tells you, young and fertile American women who haven’t ridden the carousel won’t consider anyone over 30 unless you have mad connections or are a family friend.

But if you want a foreign wife, that buys you some time. Foreign girls are more feminine and don’t mind age gaps as much. In many ways, you’re getting a better deal than with a western wife. Learn how to start a business, stack cash along the way, and move abroad. Take care of your body, stay away from drugs, don’t drink too much, and don’t even think about TRT, and you’ll still be fertile into your 40s. Fertility only drops about 1% each year after 25, provided you’re healthy, so its not like that drops off a cliff.

Although I’m not as militant about it, being a lifelong player is not a good long term plan for your life if you’re in the super majority of men.
04-09-2019 07:37 PM
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Post: #35
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 07:15 PM)Ouroboros Wrote:  
(04-09-2019 04:22 PM)doc holliday Wrote:  My advice to young guys is to seek quality over quantity, all day, any day. Sticking your dick in crazy or fattie or cunty just because you can, just because it's there for the taking is destroying a lot of young men. Just like women lose their ability to bond after too many partners, the same happens to young men when they put their dicks in too many bad places. You end up thinking all women are shit. You end up thinking that you, yourself, are shit. Just like it is said that you are the average of 10 of the closest people you hang out with, I believe you can extend this and say that most dudes are the average of the chicks they've fucked. Most guys these days are banging too much dog shit and as such, most dudes these days are not much to behold. If nothing else gets listened to here, I think that guys need to go after quality, not quantity, especially when you get over 25. You should be maturing and growing enough as a man to attract a better class of women after 25. Your game should be about attracting the best chicks, not the most chicks. Those two things are not remotely the same and require different styles of game ( yes there is some overlap between the two styles no doubt). Being married in this day and age is hard, which is all the more reason for the need to be discerning and knowing how to attract quality. Most guys don't however and end up with slim pickings once they get into their mid to late 30s.

Do you see any value in chasing notches for a limited amount of time, up to a moderate level (say 10-25), for the sake of developing your confidence/game/social skills/knowledge of women?

Although it may be out of vogue on the forum right now, I think it is at least useful to acquire new flags, so that you know what is out there, and you understand that the women you encounter at home do not necessarily reflect the global norm. If you're on the lookout for a lifetime partner it's useful to know that not all sexual marketplaces are alike, and some might suit you better than others.

Well I believe in balance, moderation as your describing. I think anything done to an extreme is bad. If you're a young guy and you wanna chase some pussy, sure, nothing wrong with that at all. Hell if you're an old divorced guy too, then sure thing. When you're in your 20s, there is definitely something said to getting the chase out of your system. Getting comfortable talking to girls, gaining confidence, of course, it's normal and natural to want to chase notches. The problem as I see it now though with a lot of young guys is that all they want to do is chase and rack up notches, like it's a video game, and it becomes an obsession. Tinder and other apps are facilitating this obsession. As a result, they never get it out of their system. All they see is a notch, the ego boost and not another human being on the other end of the notch.

Before the existence of these hideous, dehumanizing apps, you actually had to physically go out and chase pussy, there was no sitting at home and doing it. You had to get dressed up, look good, carry a conversation, get a phone number etc., in order to get laid. So this had some actual value in terms of developing one's social skills but as you can imagine, it took a lot of effort to regularly do all of this so you could only maintain this for so long. Most guys would do it for a while, then get a gf. Then you'd get into your late 20s, grow up and move out of that phase. Now, we got guys who want to do this shit until their mid 40s for god sake, they can't ever quit the game. Notch chasing up to a certain point is fine but eventually you gotta grow out of it. If for nothing else, your own sanity and well being.

Another big issue with obsessive notch chasing is that it makes guys do reckless things, resulting in things like STDs, unwanted pregnancies and abortions. The dehumanizing effect of this lifestyle that both genders are leading these days is a huge reason for the rise of this #metoo garbage. Girls get pumped and dumped, predictably feel like shit after and convince themselves that they were raped. Guys don't do themselves many favors either in the way they treat the girls after the lay. You kick a bitch out abruptly after sex like a lot of dudes do, then expect that she's gonna feel like shit and in the extreme case go after you. The whole notch lifestyle is ok up to a point but beyond that, I don't see much good that comes from it but I do see a whole lot of bad though.
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 08:53 PM by doc holliday.)
04-09-2019 08:46 PM
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TripleG Offline
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Post: #36
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
I read all the posts and I stand corrected in that 30s is the best age to start a family and I disagree with Doc Holiday's thinking about starting as early as possible with a few exceptions (for example military families where a guy is at risk of dying or for example 3rd world countries where only basic necessities to survive are expected of the man).

Shoot, many careers in the west require more than 4 years to establish, and most guys when they finish school are in debt and barely making ends meet. Very few lawyers, doctors, professors, engineers, etc. can think of family matters when they are 25 (perhaps Doc Holiday is the exception to this rule). I have a sibling who spent close to 10 years in school becoming a doctor. All she did was work and study in her 20's with a short gap of 1 year (to rest) between graduate schools. She makes 250k+ per year now, and has no regrets waiting till her 30s to have kids. Now she is able to help the family financially and send her kids to good daycare. I seriously doubt if she had wifed up and had multiple kids by the age of 25 she would have ever been able to develop a professional career, in her case becoming a successful doctor.
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 09:04 PM by TripleG.)
04-09-2019 09:03 PM
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Post: #37
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
Actually Triple G, I did say in my first post on this thread that early 30s was ideal to settle down in this day. 25 is too young to get married for most guys but I said it's the age where the migration out of the player stage should begin. Just wanted to clarify my stance.
04-09-2019 09:30 PM
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Post: #38
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 09:03 PM)TripleG Wrote:  I have a sibling who spent close to 10 years in school becoming a doctor. All she did was work and study in her 20's with a short gap of 1 year (to rest) between graduate schools. She makes 250k+ per year now, and has no regrets waiting till her 30s to have kids. Now she is able to help the family financially and send her kids to good daycare. I seriously doubt if she had wifed up and had multiple kids by the age of 25 she would have ever been able to develop a professional career, in her case becoming a successful doctor.

Okay, so she spent her most fertile years studying and working hard. Now she's spending her mature years working even harder. All so she could earn a nice salary... and buy good daycare for her kids?

Assuming she likes her kids and wants to spend time with them, it sounds like an exceptionally bad deal. What's better for her kids? Going to daycare, or spending time with their mom?

I don't know, I think she'd have been better off marrying in her 20s, being a stay-at-home mom and actually raising her kids instead of delegating motherhood.

Would she have been poorer? Sure. Does it matter? Unless we're talking about crippling poverty, not that much. In the long term, spending time with your family is more important than owning the latest iPad.
04-09-2019 09:37 PM
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Post: #39
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 06:06 PM)Thrill Jackson Wrote:  A good rule of thumb is the half + 7 rule.

"Half age plus seven rule: In dating/romantic/intimate relationships, the age of the younger person should not be less than half the age of the older person plus seven years." (source: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:...p-rule.svg )

[Image: 567px-Half-age-plus-seven-relationship-rule.svg.png]

22yr old male-> 18yr old chicks
23yr old male-> 18.5yr old chick
24yr old male-> 19yr old chick
25yr old male -> 19.5yr old chick

etc.


As many have stated on this thread you don't want to start a marriage with a chick when she is 25+ years old.

More likely to be jaded from too many cocks and the milk is starting too sour up.

Waiting until you're 35 will leave with broads who are right around the 25 year mark.

That's pushing your luck. I would pump the brakes on the player train to around 29-30yrs old and then really focus on quality over quantity.

Thank you for being consistent and logical in your argument, makes sense to me. Okay, 40 is maybe too high. Perhaps I was delusional looking at people like Dan Bilzerian, Hugh Hefner, Charlie Sheen or Leonardo DiCaprio.

35 doesn't sound bad at all to me, that's 10 years.

"Chase a check, never chase a bitch."
- Future

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."
- Heat

"That's the difference between you and me. You wanna lose small, I wanna win big."
04-09-2019 09:40 PM
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Post: #40
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 09:37 PM)Borges Wrote:  I don't know, I think she'd have been better off marrying in her 20s, being a stay-at-home mom and actually raising her kids instead of delegating motherhood.

Would she have been poorer? Sure. Does it matter? Unless we're talking about crippling poverty, not that much. In the long term, spending time with your family is more important than owning the latest iPad.

The problem with this is living in the West is so expensive that it requires two incomes for the majority of the population.
04-09-2019 09:41 PM
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Post: #41
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
"Male fertility generally starts to decline around age 40–45 years when sperm quality decreases. Increasing male age reduces the overall chances of pregnancy and increases time to pregnancy (the number of menstrual cycles it takes to become pregnant) and the risk of miscarriage and fetal death."

Source:
https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/health/conditionsandtreatments/age-and-fertility

I thought for man it starts at the age of 40?
How is it that people saying different things, any links and sources?

"Chase a check, never chase a bitch."
- Future

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."
- Heat

"That's the difference between you and me. You wanna lose small, I wanna win big."
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 09:49 PM by bgbusiness.)
04-09-2019 09:49 PM
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Eddie Winslow Offline
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Post: #42
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
I just turned 32 yesterday, and I already feel too old to give you decent life advice.

The world is so much different from even 10 years ago, and its continuing to change so insanely fast that A+ advice now may be obsolete in 2-3 years. Some shit I learned at 27 is already totally useless

I will say this - I’ve been a straight up disciple of this forum since late 2011. I’ve followed the contradictory advice of banging a bunch of girls with no remorse, but demanding a conservative mother-of-my-children type girl for a relationship. I quit a super solid career to try a super risky startup business, which had incredible highs but failed spectacularly and had me on the verge of suicide, but taught me a ton. I’ve gone through long down periods in the past few years of living alone in the suburbs and doing nothing but working out, going to work, and drinking alone, wondering who’s life advice was really the best, and what I did wrong.

No one in your family, none of your friends, and certainly no RVF interenet strangers know what’s best for you. No one cares about your hopes and dreams besides YOU. Do whatever makes you happy, whether it is dating one girl or ten, or none. Marry a dude and adopt a bunch of puppies that are HIV positive, no one fucking cares. I certainly don’t.

Try logging off the forum for a couple weeks and try your hardest to imagine YOUR ideal lifestyle, whatever that is. Then determine the steps to get there and get to work. Fuck everyone else.

Just don’t get fat - I’m 95% certain that advice will still be considered good in three years.
04-09-2019 09:54 PM
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Post: #43
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-09-2019 09:54 PM)Eddie Winslow Wrote:  I just turned 32 yesterday, and I already feel too old to give you decent life advice.

The world is so much different from even 10 years ago, and its continuing to change so insanely fast that A+ advice now may be obsolete in 2-3 years. Some shit I learned at 27 is already totally useless

I will say this - I’ve been a straight up disciple of this forum since late 2011. I’ve followed the contradictory advice of banging a bunch of girls with no remorse, but demanding a conservative mother-of-my-children type girl for a relationship. I quit a super solid career to try a super risky startup business, which had incredible highs but failed spectacularly and had me on the verge of suicide, but taught me a ton. I’ve gone through long down periods in the past few years of living alone in the suburbs and doing nothing but working out, going to work, and drinking alone, wondering who’s life advice was really the best, and what I did wrong.

No one in your family, none of your friends, and certainly no RVF interenet strangers know what’s best for you. No one cares about your hopes and dreams besides YOU. Do whatever makes you happy, whether it is dating one girl or ten, or none. Marry a dude and adopt a bunch of puppies that are HIV positive, no one fucking cares. I certainly don’t.

Try logging off the forum for a couple weeks and try your hardest to imagine YOUR ideal lifestyle, whatever that is. Then determine the steps to get there and get to work. Fuck everyone else.

Just don’t get fat - I’m 95% certain that advice will still be considered good in three years.

Fuck, this is probably the one of best advice that I received so far.
Thank you, really appreciate it.

"Chase a check, never chase a bitch."
- Future

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."
- Heat

"That's the difference between you and me. You wanna lose small, I wanna win big."
(This post was last modified: 04-09-2019 10:01 PM by bgbusiness.)
04-09-2019 10:00 PM
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ChefAllDay Offline
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Post: #44
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
That is fekked. At 50 I should be checking the 85 box? No fracking way that's ever happening.

"Women however should get a spanking at least once a week by their husbands and boyfriends - that should be mandated by law" - Zelcorpion
04-09-2019 10:08 PM
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Alpone Offline
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Post: #45
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
The number of dudes pushing OP to get married is lol.

I know many married dudes. I also know many players. The players seem to maintain their ambition, fitness & focus. The married dudes let it all go to shit.

Of course, this is a generalization and only based on my sample.

Marriage is awesome if you find a girl you love and you connect on many levels and have the same goals and she meets feminine ideals.

Marriage because 'I may hit the male wall and I'll be alone forever" is an absolute shit reason to get married in 21st century America given toxic-feminist culture and the toxic-feminist industrial divorce complex.

Good [marriage] decisions aren't made out of fear.
04-09-2019 11:11 PM
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doc holliday Offline
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Post: #46
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
No one's pushing the guy to get married. All that's being pointed out is that waiting until 40 to get married is fraught with all sorts of difficulties and that IF he's going to go that route, he'd be better off doing it a few years earlier. Only the OP can decide what's best for him but he asked for advice and he's receiving some. He doesn't like what he's hearing but obviously he hasn't got an intrinsic idea as to how to proceed in his life so he's asking a bunch of strangers for advice.

Most of the older guys I'm friends with that are players are for the most part guys that I like but they are guys who are very self centered and guys that are on a lower of level of trust for me compared to my friends who have gone and done the family thing. My married/divorced friends understand the meaning of sacrifice and living for something larger than themselves far more than my single friends who only live for themselves and their own desires and as such are far more dependable when shit goes down. It's funny how the "get notches at all cost crowd" don't like hearing that their lifestyle is not all that wonderful and not all that conducive to building trustful relationships with other men even though deep down they know it to be true.
(This post was last modified: 04-10-2019 12:17 AM by doc holliday.)
04-09-2019 11:56 PM
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Leonard D Neubache Offline
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Post: #47
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
I guess I sound salty.

A side effect of going through the same debate over and over again I suppose.

I'll give you just one piece of advice then in the hopes you'll remember it when the time comes.

If an honest-to-God incredible woman lands in your lap don't next her for five more years of soul-less sluts just because "that's the plan".

The guys I know who did that list it as among their greatest regrets. Unfortunately it seems to be the case for most men trying to get off the cunt carousel that once the stink of sluts is on your soul then that's all you'll ever attract. Past notch 50 you become invisible to decent women and they become invisible to you.

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
04-10-2019 12:06 AM
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Post: #48
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-10-2019 12:06 AM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  I guess I sound salty.

A side effect of going through the same debate over and over again I suppose.

I'll give you just one piece of advice then in the hopes you'll remember it when the time comes.

If an honest-to-God incredible woman lands in your lap don't next her for five more years of soul-less sluts just because "that's the plan".

The guys I know who did that list it as among their greatest regrets. Unfortunately it seems to be the case for most men trying to get off the cunt carousel that once the stink of sluts is on your soul then that's all you'll ever attract. Past notch 50 you become invisible to decent women and they become invisible to you.

Co-signed.

After telling TravelerKai over a coffee that I’m gonna wait 5 years before deciding to marry again and travel in the meantime, he responded that I shouldn’t put a strict timeline on it.

He asked me, “so you find an unicorn before the 5 years are up, whatcha gonna do?”

I’ve already found my answer.
04-10-2019 12:11 AM
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AWright Offline
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Post: #49
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
I guess it depends what you want, I'm 28 and my plan for my 30's is to live abroad and bang as many women as I can, living the player lifestyle. I'll settle down in my 40's (maybe). I agree with a lot of the guys here that is is probably difficult to get quality in your 40's in the states but not abroad if you can have a plan on living abroad. I have my plan and it is unfolding and I'll be out of the United States permanently in 4 months.
04-10-2019 01:25 AM
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Post: #50
RE: Older players (Mid 30s & 40+), Advice for 25yo
(04-10-2019 01:25 AM)AWright Wrote:  I guess it depends what you want, I'm 28 and my plan for my 30's is to live abroad and bang as many women as I can, living the player lifestyle. I'll settle down in my 40's (maybe). I agree with a lot of the guys here that is is probably difficult to get quality in your 40's in the states but not abroad if you can have a plan on living abroad. I have my plan and it is unfolding and I'll be out of the United States permanently in 4 months.

I'm "abroad" in South America. I can't remember the last time I saw a married couple with a 15yr+ age difference. It happened relatively often in the past, but those couples are becoming very rare. The latest official stats support my perception - the average age gap for marriages in 2017 was just 2 years.

Of course, I'm talking about locals. It's much worse if you're foreign. Don't get me wrong, being a foreigner is great for banging adventurous girls off Tinder and their night club equivalents, but it actually works against you when it comes to relationships. In particular relationships with quality girls, who mostly meet guys through their social circles. An older foreigner marrying a quality 20-something local girl... I'm not going to say impossible, but believe me, the odds for that are extremely slim. Quality local girls marry quality local guys in their age range, not 40yo gringos. Your best shot in that scenario would be a 30+ yo woman - a single mom or divorcee - who could very well be a great and good looking woman, but probably not what you have in mind when you say "quality".

Unless you are talking about Africa or I suppose Southeast Asia, looking for a wife abroad in your 40s sounds like a terrible plan. Especially if you consider the fact that those 10 years of waiting around mean 10 years of globalisation and Westernisation for whichever country you're planning to do wife hunting in. It's hard now, it will be exponentially harder in 10 years.
04-10-2019 06:15 AM
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