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The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
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Brazilianguy Offline
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Post: #26
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(04-17-2019 12:56 PM)sterling_archer Wrote:  @Brazilianguy

Have you ever encountered beings Castaneda refers to as "inorganic beings"? These are beings you can encounter in lucid dream, which are emissaries or foreign energies not part of your own astral bubble (your own dreamworld).

I read all of Castaneda´s books in my teens (before I got to know ayahuasca and spirit contact), but never experienced anything like what he describes.
He admitted his accounts were fake, and really were just an exercise in anthropology, but at the time UCLA muffled it because they were getting a lot of new students thanks to Castaneda´s widespread success in book sales.

If what you mean by "inorganic beings" are simply beings that are not part of your subconscious, then yes.
Spirits are independent beings just as you are. You are a complete, independent being and not a figment of my subsconscious.
The trick is that ayahuasca in low dosages will take you on a psychological journey, but in higher dosages it will open your spiritual eye to perceive subtle dimensions that are objective, so the beings you will encounter there also are.
(This post was last modified: 04-17-2019 01:13 PM by Brazilianguy.)
04-17-2019 01:05 PM
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loremipsum Offline
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Post: #27
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(04-14-2019 04:26 AM)Tex Wrote:  Max hits his hits off the pipe and I see the look on his face. We're both a little jittery going into this because we know that whatever is going to happen, it's going to be ridiculous. So I was watching the look on his face real closely to see how we handled it.

After he did his hits, he had this look of panic and he was looking down at the pipe. He had this pissed off smirk like he remembered the punchline to some cruel joke that he was the target of. After about two seconds of that, he looked up and his face melted into this worried/sad expression when he saw me. He later would tell me that he was trying to communicate "Don't hit this pipe. It's worse than we thought," with that look.


(04-14-2019 04:26 AM)Tex Wrote:  The final wave of realizations came as the pull started to completely take me. Maybe it's the most disturbing part of salvia. It's the realization that this place wasn't new to me. It was familiar. And I don't mean familiar in the sense of "I just smoked salvia X months ago." I mean familiar as in "I remember this place from memories I had from before I was born" familiar. Familiar like the place reminded me of truths I had once known, ideas I once had, places I had once been, and I forgot them, but as I was forgetting them the first time, I thought, "Man, I need to remember these things forever." Then I forgot them, and now that I was re-remembering them, I was thinking, "My God, how could I have ever forgotten this?"

I have heard so many times from trip reports that it's as if our life is a comedy to the salvia entities, and the primordial void is the real reality. Even googling "Salvia bad trip joke" will yield results.
Having seen lucid dreams where entities are telling me I'm stuck there for eons, salvia sounds so fucking menacing I wouldn't try it even if I got paid.
(This post was last modified: 05-20-2019 03:03 PM by loremipsum.)
05-20-2019 02:55 PM
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Post: #28
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(05-20-2019 02:55 PM)loremipsum Wrote:  The final wave of realizations came as the pull started to completely take me. Maybe it's
I have heard so many times from trip reports that it's as if our life is a comedy to the salvia entities, and the primordial void is the real reality. Even googling "Salvia bad trip joke" will yield results.
Having seen lucid dreams where entities are telling me I'm stuck there for eons, salvia sounds so fucking menacing I wouldn't try it even if I got paid.

It's pretty gay honestly, but it sounds like chewing the leaves can give you a great experience.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
05-23-2019 10:10 PM
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ThriceLazarus Offline
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Post: #29
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
loremipsum Wrote:Having seen lucid dreams where entities are telling me I'm stuck there for eons, salvia sounds so fucking menacing I wouldn't try it even if I got paid.

Salvia is a hell of a drug.

I had a year where I experimented with the leaf. The interesting thing about it is that you build an inverse tolerance over time - that is, the more you use it the deeper you go with less inbibed.

I had an ounce of plain leaf, a gram of x3 extract (where the leaves are coated in salvia tincture such that it’s x times the dose), and a quarter ounce of x20 extract.

I started with the x3 extract - smoked in quarter grams out of a spoon pipe. These trips were actually quite enjoyable. I remained lucid to the physical world which took on a kaleidoscopic quality. Colors were blindingly bright, and there seemed to be this popping effect of everything rushing towards me - similar to the graphics at the end of a game of solitaire.

[Image: lzc1w3rnemh01.jpg]

Would recommend, though I suggest a trip sitter in case you break through.

Because x20 blasts you through the fucking fabric of space and time.

These trips were taken in quarter gram doses to half gram doses, smoked from an empty waterpipe. Each hit was torched and completely toked and ghosted. It tastes like tea and melted plastic. Though not for long, simply because you disappear.

I’ll briefly describe a few of the experiences I had.

- The first trip, I remained in my body in my room. At first, the entire space ballooned out of 3 dimensions, becoming a four dimensional tapestry in a space far bigger than it had any right to be. It’s difficult to explain, but what I saw was every angle of the room folding in and out of itself - what was before me, beside, behind, above and below.

Soon I became stuck, and from my body rippled an infinite wall of flesh above me, below, from side to side, spanning out to oblivion where the tesselating patterns never lost their definition. Before me the world was slowly saturated by an expanse of formless gray.

I was not alone here, I was a gargoyle set in my place, and equidistant from me in neat rows and columns were others - other gargoyles all set as I was. Some were laughing, others wailing, many chattering amongst one another. It was bewildering. Suddenly, the wall lurched, and there was a ‘wave’ like at soccer stadium, rushing in from the edges of Nowhere until it washed past me to the other stretch of infinity. Ruefully, I missed the signal and broke the pattern. After it had passed, I was jolted back into my body.

For a minute, my vision had been rotated by 90 degrees, the world turning back rightwards only when I dared to move.

- After the exhale, there started a tingling at my fingertips. This spread up my hands and limbs, to encompass the entire body. After a moment, it felt as if my fingernails were being torn off. Then the skin. I was being flayed alive. As this sensation overtook me, my vision went to black.

I know this sounds like the talk of a tough guy, but I suffer from the occasional cluster headache attack which is considered the most painful medical condition known to man.

[Image: flat,1000x1000,075,f.jpg]

This was worse.

Every inch of my body was agony. As I was wracked with pain, a sheet of wet red flesh - razor thin - flopped from nowhere into the void. Followed by another, and another. To describe it, it looked like a book of meat paper bounded with jagged bone. Hundreds of pages played against one another, all the while I was writhing. At some point - time had no meaning, the entirety of this experience was objectively less than 5 minutes, subjectively aeons - I realized two things. First, the thing I was staring at was a fractal. Second, I was trapped wherever I was until the fractal finished itself.

Fractals never end.

At that point, I broke into maniacal laughter, and the thing I was watching ‘rotated’ such that I could see another face of it. And the wet flapping started again. And again. And again. Each time faster, each time larger.

As the Thing became more intricate, I realized it was muscle tissue. I could see nerve and blood vessels and bone and suddenly, blessedly, I had rebuilt myself from one cell into ten trillion, my body coalescing back into reality.

My pain tolerance has been phenomenally high ever since. For example, I worked as a line cook for a number of years, and when I accidently flooded my leather shoe with 375F cooking oil I just shrugged to the bewilderment of the rest of the kitchen. It’s not that I dont feel pain, or that I’m immune to it, it’s just nothing compares. Even the suicide headaches.

- Once I was spirited away to a space infinite white, where there hung countless gossamer strands spiraling together in inticate, winding helixes. Clinging to these coalescing chords were pearls of reality, bubbled-black space-time studded with swirling galaxies, scintillating like dew on a spider’s web.

There were beings there, reptilian in nature. They were travelers, moving from realm to realm, their forms as Adonis or Aphrodite, their eyes brilliant jewels cut with black slits.

They were not unkind. Our conversations were long and pleasant.

- There was only one experience out of many that I could not remember. I inhaled and died. When I came back from the Void delerious the ember of the leaf had fallen from the bowl, burned through my clothes, and into my leg.

There were other experiences, though those are too intimate to share.

All the while I casually smoked the plain leaf from a peace pipe. At first, it presented as a pleasant buzz. After a few months, plain leaf was as potent as x3 extract. As the plain leaf began to take on the taste of the x20 extract I put the stuff away.

I’d gotten the message and hung up the phone.

I hope this is helpful to those who dare to dance with Lady Salvia.
(This post was last modified: 05-25-2019 01:44 AM by ThriceLazarus.)
05-25-2019 01:33 AM
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Tex Offline
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Post: #30
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
Salvia pain is great. In the sense that it's mind-bendingly terrible.

One thing I've noticed about pain generally is that it, like any other intense stimuli, has a transcendental nature to it that you can find yourself "moving into." And as you move into it you gradually leave things behind. Your worries, your dreams, your thoughts, your ideas, your sense of human identity.

I say this as I'm on DXM.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
05-25-2019 01:47 AM
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RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(05-25-2019 01:33 AM)ThriceLazarus Wrote:  These trips were taken in quarter gram doses to half gram doses, smoked from an empty waterpipe. Each hit was torched and completely toked and ghosted. It tastes like tea and melted plastic.

That's a really accurate way to describe the taste too. Kudos.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
05-25-2019 01:53 AM
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ThriceLazarus Offline
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Post: #32
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
@Tex

To you as well! I just realized that I never repsonded to your trip report, but everything you said echoes. Expertly described, especially the pull and the existential dread that comes with it.

That feeling after every hit where you just know you fucked up. That you’re gonna learn today.

And the malevolence of it! Out of dozens of experiences, three were alright. The rest were exercises in Death.

From what I understand, salvia divinorum acts on our proprioceptors, especially the ones in our ear that affect balance. Hence that sort of swirling tug down and to the side. It’s as if it fucks up your understanding of where you are in space so badly that you fall through it.

I have a hunch that the salvia space is very close to the astral realm from Hermetic thought - the layer of reality completely divorced from physicality, mentalism, and spirit. Pure emotional turmoil.

Have you ever had any flashbacks? Once when I was strolling around San Diego’s night life, a conversation overheard about the stuff just triggered something in me. The street ahead curled and barreled like a wave, and I straight up fell to the right.
(This post was last modified: 05-25-2019 02:12 AM by ThriceLazarus.)
05-25-2019 02:09 AM
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Tex Offline
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Post: #33
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(05-25-2019 02:09 AM)ThriceLazarus Wrote:  I have a hunch that the salvia space is very close to the astral realm from Hermetic thought - the layer of reality completely divorced from physicality, mentalism, and spirit. Pure emotional turmoil.

I've been thinking a lot about what these different realms are. I assume that whatever terms we describe them in here while we're alive will have to be comically simplified conceptual shadows of what these places really are. But part of me feels like we have some kind of duty to at least roughly sketch out what these realms are before death so we better orient ourselves for when the time comes. Somehow.

Salvia definitely feels like a place that we came out of at some point, maybe earlier in our spiritual "evolution." A place, like you said, of raw emotional energy. Like a spiritual planet except the planet is exploding in horrific volcanos and and patrolled by telepathic shadow monsters. And every now and then there's a nice little river and a grassy hill haha.

It's interesting to go into these places and compare them to the hermetic, Christian, and eastern traditions and see how they compare. But part of me does think that some of these really far out places are totally alien to any previous religious contemplation (like DMT for instance). The implications of that are scary really.

I don't think I've ever had salvia flashbacks, but I have had thoughts or come to conclusions about things that sort of bring on that general vibe of being in a deep salvia trip. Where I think "Maybe the world is like XYZ," and then the thought itself sends a shock down my spine and makes my balls go cold. Maybe that is a mild flashback in a way.

Have you experimented with dissociatives at all?

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
(This post was last modified: 05-25-2019 10:37 AM by Tex.)
05-25-2019 10:33 AM
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sterling_archer Offline
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Post: #34
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
All these "places" are part of Astral, since Astral world is actually composed of worlds of various "coarseness". We cannot really distinguish where one stops and other one begins since we are not dealing with either time nor geographical place, but difference between those places can definitely be felt.
05-25-2019 03:28 PM
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RiskIt4Biscuit Offline
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Post: #35
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(05-25-2019 01:33 AM)ThriceLazarus Wrote:  My pain tolerance has been phenomenally high ever since. For example, I worked as a line cook for a number of years, and when I accidently flooded my leather shoe with 375F cooking oil I just shrugged to the bewilderment of the rest of the kitchen. It’s not that I dont feel pain, or that I’m immune to it, it’s just nothing compares. Even the suicide headaches.

That is truely one of the most interesting things i`ve ever read about after effects from a trip.
And one of the few times i`ve heard anything "positive" from the use of salvia.
I remember reading a forum post years ago saying:
Iboga/ibogaine - The father
Ayahuasca - the mother
Mushrooms - big brother/sister
Salvia - crazy uncle fester
05-26-2019 01:45 PM
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monster Offline
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Post: #36
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
Salvia does not sound like fun at all after reading everyone's trip reports !

Hope some folks post some non-Salvia reports!
(This post was last modified: 05-27-2019 08:15 PM by monster.)
05-27-2019 08:12 PM
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godfather dust Away
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Post: #37
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
Salvia is terrifying but only lasts 5 minutes.
05-27-2019 09:55 PM
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Post: #38
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(05-27-2019 09:55 PM)godfather dust Wrote:  Salvia is terrifying but only lasts 5 minutes.

Five minutes from the standpoint of the outside observer looking at you as you’re on the drug.

Salvia is like a black hole in that the closer you get to the event horizon of the trip the more dialates until it’s at a standstill for you and you’re stuck there for what might as well be thousands of years.

monster Wrote:Hope some folks post some non-Salvia reports!

I’ll jump in with one later today because things have definitely taken a heavy salvia-heavy theme on this thread.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
(This post was last modified: 05-29-2019 06:59 AM by Tex.)
05-29-2019 06:58 AM
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ThriceLazarus Offline
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Post: #39
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
@Tex

Never had the opportunity to. I’d like to eventually try ketamine, not too interested in DXM.

I think that existential terror comes from the fact that you just don’t know how long you’re going to be gone. The few experiences I had with the lower grade extracts or the plain-leaf (before my aptitude became too high for it) were mildly to very pleasant.

A substance I can vouch for is microdosed psilocybin. While I’ve never had the opportunity to venture deeply into shroom space, ~1g provides a very grounded headspace, and superb resolution - extreme detail when appreciating things close up, and the ability to resolve things miles and miles away.
05-29-2019 07:56 PM
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Post: #40
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
Ugh salvia. Thrice hit it on the head as the experience. I did it only once and never again.

I've done a lot of psychedelics . Shrooms, acid, 2ci, dmt. All of them were ... Interesting but salvia was downright terrifying and unpleasant.

DMT though was out of this world. No really, tripping on shrooms or acid isnt anywhere to what DMT is like. The smell of it burning is similar to a burnt rubber scent.

Harsh stuff, I read that a vaporizer is better and reduces that smell.

An MAOI will make the trip last longer. That's what ayausca is doing.

Really, DMT shows you what the 4th dimension is. Go and look at 4d images . They didn't make amy sense to me until I did DMT. Now i go back to look at them to remind me of the experience.

You may or may not meet entities. They do communicate with you and will tell you stuff and you can talk back with them.

Well worth the experience. It's 15 minutes of a lifetime.

Shalom Alechem!
05-30-2019 12:51 AM
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RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
DMT is the one psychedelic I really want to do that I haven't done yet, but my experience with salvia and really deep dissociative trips has educated me on what it feels like to do a drug and not know if the drug killed you immediately after. It's scary as hell.

ThriceLazarus Wrote:Never had the opportunity to. I’d like to eventually try ketamine, not too interested in DXM.

If you've never felt anything like a dissociative before you'd probably love ketamine. It's friendly and hard to freak out even on a k-hole. You just feel as cozy as you possibly can. But I had done enough high-powered dissociatives by the time I got to ketamine that it was boring.

Dissociatives get a dirty connotation compared to psychedelics but in my experience they are more consistently spiritual. The most profound trip I ever had was on a deep dissociative trip. Let me go into a little detail.

I had busted my ass the week before and decided to spend the entire Saturday afternoon going deeper and deeper into this dissociative that I was very familiar with. After I had gotten more blasted than I had ever been in my life, I took one more line and went into my bedroom to wait for my girlfriend at the time to show up.

As I'm waiting, I start to feel the dissociation build. Dissociation is a little different than coming up on a psychedelic in that you are much more conscious of how you are getting incrementally more fucked up. With psychedelics you tend to notice you're tripping more and more in chunks. With a disso, you intimately feel your mind go little by little.

This was happening to me and I knew I was much more dissociated than I had ever been, so each increment of dissociation added to my brain was a totally new experience that I had to decide whether or not I was okay with it in real time.

I feel a bit more dissociated. "Am I okay with this?" I ask myself. I look around the room. "Okay, I know where I am. I'm in my room." I think about who I am. "I'm Tex." Good. I'm okay with this so far.

I get much more dissociated just thirty seconds later. Again, I ask, "Am I okay with this?" I think about who I am. I know my name, but I can't really figure out how I'm living in the state I'm living in and my life doesn't make too much sense. Everything is going great in my life. It doesn't seem like it could be real.

Now, twenty seconds later, I'm way more dissociated. Back to the question at hand. "Am I okay with this?" I have no grasp on anything. "No, this is a bit much. I am not okay with this. Let me get a little acclimated here." Before I can get acclimated, I'm hit with another huge wave and I panic because I just realized I now am getting so dissociated so fast that I can't actually keep up with an accurate assessment of how dissociated that even is.

I don't know who I am, how I got here, where I am. I basically black out for a second. Then I come to again and I'm sitting in my bed facing my girlfriend.

Instantly everything comes back to me. I know who I am and where I am and who the girl in front of me is. I even know I did a drug. But I feel weird. Weird in the way that I've never felt on a drug. Weird in a way that I don't accept could possibly be caused by a drug.

Then it hits me. I'm dead. I'm trapped here, in this moment. I overdosed and I died and now I'm sitting here as a ghost months later. I must have been dead for a long time. My girlfriend can't see me, she's just sad and talking to me but really talking to herself because she knows she's alone in the room she found me dead in and she's just trying to get closure. There was no doubt in my mind that this was the exact situation I was in. None at all. The truth was just obvious.

For a moment I freaked out and tried to escape. I got up, walked out my room, went down the hall, and opened the front door. But there was nothing on the other side. It was just black. I was stuck here.

Then an entity appeared to me but it was invisible. It spoke to me but not in words. In communicated with emotions. I experienced its presence like one would experience the Holy Ghost. And it told me that I needed to come to terms with being dead so I could move on to hell.

I went back in the room and tried to make my amends with my girlfriend as a ghost. In that time I got to look back on my life with an entirely new perspective. I was worried about where my body was, if my dad saw my body, how my family was taking it, how I failed in life because I died before I could accomplish what I wanted. I realized that there's no point in feeling regret when you're alive because you're still alive.

Now I could do nothing. What I had done was the sum total of my life and that was all.

At some point in trying to talk to my girlfriend, that dead feeling started washing away. You now have a second chance. I felt like I came back to life in this reality and the universe post hoc explained my experience by putting me in a world where dissociatives could be the explanation for that kind of feeling. I was still incredibly fucked up, but I knew I was alive.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
05-30-2019 09:02 AM
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Oz. Offline
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Post: #42
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
Good thread, I first tried psychedelics in high school. I was about 17 years old, a senior and did LSD for about 6 months once a week until it started to have negative psychological effects on me.

After that I tried shrooms for a period of time, salvia a couple of times and DMT various times.

In my opinion the best psychedelic (from those I have tried) is a good high dose of shrooms. As potent as people say DMT is, it really didn’t do much for me since I was already used to tripping for hours as opposed to 15-20 minutes.

LSD is great until you start taking large doses of it, at least for me it was. At some point it just becomes downright scary.

I can share some of my trips later when I have more time, I still want to try other things in the future specially ayuahasca.

(11-15-2014 09:06 AM)Little Dark Wrote:  This thread is not going in the direction I was hoping for.
05-31-2019 11:51 AM
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Post: #43
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(05-30-2019 09:02 AM)Tex Wrote:  I went back in the room and tried to make my amends with my girlfriend as a ghost. In that time I got to look back on my life with an entirely new perspective. I was worried about where my body was, if my dad saw my body, how my family was taking it, how I failed in life because I died before I could accomplish what I wanted. I realized that there's no point in feeling regret when you're alive because you're still alive.

Now I could do nothing. What I had done was the sum total of my life and that was all.

Wow, that's quite an experience.

Did it change your worldview and view of yourself after?

I imagine a reset like that would help me appreciate life more and taken less for granted.
05-31-2019 10:55 PM
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RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
I tried DMT several times.

During that time of life I was very self-destructive with alcohol, which would sometimes act as a gateway to more harmful substances and lead to a couple very moronic arrests. I was nihilistic , depressive and full of pessimism and had lots of trouble with all relationships (both friendships and with girls), and had no idea what my place in the "stupid" world was except to be miserable.

A friend was into psychedelics. He loved talking about the visuals of DMT all the time, but he never really mentioned much about the self-awareness aspect, which leads me to believe that psychedelics affect people differently: some folks have these real life-changing trips that completely sets a new course for their whole life, others just experience a "cool" trip. But that's neither here nor there. Anyway, one night he convinced me to try DMT.

The first time I did it I blasted off into the hyperspace. I saw a beautiful astral cityscape that I floated through at warp speed eventually meeting this trio of very lovely goddesses, who seemed to be glowing with a very divine Vedic energy. They embraced me and told me that they love me and that the universe loves me, and that love is the energy of everything, and then they said I'm drinking too much and killing myself. This is opposite what the universe and what love wants for me.

That experience had probably the most profound effect in my life on me. I didn't quit drinking immediately but it opened the learning path to a very major change full of lots of self-reflection and reading of philosophy (Nietzsche, Buddhism, Bhagavad Gita, etc) where I ultimately did stop drinking. My worldview changed from one of defeatism to one figuratively looking to the skies where I embraced suffering as a means of growth and progress. This experience was also the catalyst for me becoming more empathetic and collaborative of others rather than being the miserable lone wolf. I'm very thankful of that experience.

I did try it a couple other times after that which were also revealing but not with the same WOW world-changing aspect of the first time. I'm a little afraid to try it again because I feel like I reached a stage of life where I finally do understand what's good and what's not good and can differentiate between the two. Although I'm sure if I did try it again I would probably get a swift kick in the butt and be shown that what I think is good may not really be good after all - not quite ready for that though Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin
(This post was last modified: 05-31-2019 11:21 PM by monster.)
05-31-2019 11:10 PM
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Tex Offline
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Post: #45
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(05-31-2019 10:55 PM)monster Wrote:  Did it change your worldview and view of yourself after?

It did. It made me realize the finiteness of life and the limited chances we have at doing what we want to do (and figuring out what we want to do). But it didn't make me anymore motivated to do things in life I already didn't want to do. I just feel worse with myself when I was wasted time.

One thing it did teach me was the ability to call upon that mindset to evaluate my life later on. Having an experience like that made an impression on me that I don't ever forget. So much so that whenever I want, I can assume enough "what ifs" to make myself believe I died at some point in the near past and didn't realize it.

I get all the symptoms of that realization. Try to think about that in your own life as you read this.

Imagine you're dead. You died and this message is your soul's realization that things aren't normal and you can't tell when it all started but things have been off and you knew in the back of your mind something was terribly wrong but you didn't want to admit to it. So for a while you had the luxury of prolonging that innocent ignorance.

But now the truth has come and now the barriers you've set up to hide yourself from the truth give way completely.

You're now dead. The first symptom when you really truly believe this is a bit of light-headedness and the physical sensation of your psychological shock. Then your asshole gets cold and your mind races to figure out if this is really real and what it all means. The first thoughts after that you might get are, "Where is my body? How is my family taking this? How did I die?" And then, "What is this? This isn't real. Does that mean this is all going to break apart and reveal something else--the thing I wanted to prolong? The revelation of what's next for me?"

Then you can almost feel the fabric of reality buckle and you're afraid that the whole universe is about to collapse on top of you and swallow you whole. The only thing you have left is your desires for yourself and the sum total of what you actually did with all that time. Especially with what you wish you did not do.

Having done that multiple times in my life and comparing the sum of these "snapshots," I am now able to get a pretty good sense of when I am living the most fulfilled life I can be--and what activities/mindsets accompany that.

So then that gives me a nifty test for whether or not I'm making the right decisions or on the best path for myself. I think, if I'm dead and the floor has already fallen out from under me, were these choices things I can live with?

If the answer is yes, then it is unquestionable that I am confident in my actions on a genuinely spiritual level. A level where my head can be high when my life's deeds would be read out before God.

That doesn't mean it is the right thing to do, but it does mean my existential anxiety is gone, and when that is gone, death means nothing anymore.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
(This post was last modified: 06-01-2019 12:03 AM by Tex.)
05-31-2019 11:52 PM
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Post: #46
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
That last post made me realize how much being a psychonaut has changed the goals I have set for my psyche.

(Below is a manifesto as to why I personally decided to be a "psychonaut" in the sense that I semi-regularly subject myself to intense, potentially terrifying mind-altering experiences.)

I always wanted to be a mentally tough person. To me that meant being able to watch a sad movie without crying, being able to fight tough fights, and being a shoulder to cry on.

But when I realized that I could subject myself to soul-shattering, world-ending, divinity-invoking, love-making, death-defying, horror-producing psychedelic experiences, I made it my life's mission to reach a point of mental toughness that would let me dive deep into that new world. I knew it required a mental toughness maybe only shamans ever reached.

I wanted to get to the point where a "bad trip" on a seriously high level of psychedelia would be something I could digest. The first step on this path I identified was reaching the point where I'd live my life in such a way that I could honestly--I mean honestly, with every single fiber of my being and subconscious--have so little regrets and such high regard for myself that I wouldn't regret dying.

I emphasize honestly so much because when you're so blasted that you can't even remember your name, you default on your most base and deeply-ingrained ideas about yourself. When even your sense of self is stripped away, you need to have a positive impression of your essence and thus, the essence of the universe taking you.

That was very difficult to accomplish because at some point I realized what I did in my life mattered less than how I perceived my world in a fundamental way.

From there, I had to become okay with finding myself in Hell. A bad trip can literally be a tour of Dante's Inferno, so I had to be able to withstand that kind of thing for what subjectively would feel like millions of years. This would mean getting to a point where I can overcome that feeling of "Please God, not me, not right now, please take it away, I'll just go through this tomorrow, but not now." I'd have to replace these thoughts and feelings with something more centered on simply taking in the experience and being a feature of the "pain tunnel" rather than the thing the pain tunnel is channeling all of its energy into.

I'm currently at this stage of the process.

Then, I'd have to finally condition myself to not only be okay with being in Hell, but being able to observe all of its features meticulously and remember it all. To, like John C. Lilly advocated, not ever turning away from the experience and saying "enough."

This is a lot of almost superhuman mental conditioning that only military elites and DMT-drinking shamans have to go through. So why would I try to get there? Only because that is the only way I can see myself really being able to let go enough to experience the highest degrees of psychedelic experience.

In the world of psychedelics, we can't afford to be the hippies of the 60's who put all their faith in "vibes" and "set and setting."

That won't cut it in an age where weed these days can send the average Joe deep into the astral realm, where DMT is easily bought, where salvia extracts can be ordered online.

I'm talking of course to those of us who see something in that "other world." To those who look to the source of the highest, most transcendental experiences a human being can feel. There is a reason serious, sober scientists gave up atheism when these substances found their way to their doors. There is a reason these things are available in substantial quantities, in all their variations, at this point in history. There is a reason the doors to the sacred mysterious are cracking open as we find ourselves moving up the ramp of time into a transcendental end beyond the end.

I truly believe that established religions are pieces of metaphysical reality that have been expounded upon by those able to open their eyes and ears to God. But God has not caused every word explaining his World to be written into the text of the Bible. The vast majority of his Word is, as many have expected, written into the natural world. One thing written into this natural world--into us--is, of course, psychedelics. Are psychedelics, especially those naturally-occurring ones that fit in our brain's receptors like organic neurotransmitters, temptations and tricks, or the Rosetta Stone of the world around us?

I think they are the latter. I think some of us have a duty to prep ourselves to be able to gaze deep into the looking glass and pull out transcendental meaning for the rest of us. Then our combined brainpower can be used to place these pieces of transcendentalism into context.

I also believe that psychedelic hallucinations are really glimpses into string theory-style higher dimensions that are both around us and relevant to us, and these glimpses are layered over the sensory perception we naturally perceive. This therefore tends to create distorted, mix-matched perceptions where the two worlds are conflated. In this way the higher meaning is taken out of context. That is why some of us must go deeper and look further--to the point where all we see is what is above.

There is a reason psychedelics produce reality-shattering experiences dripping with meaning. You've heard people talk about the experiences of kundalini yoga, of fasting, of intense prayer, of meditation, of being in nature. These all create transcendental experiences, almost as proof of their purity. But do these things come anywhere near the profundity that psychedelics can bring? Absolutely not.

We are standing at the edge of time briefly living in a world of chaos. We as a society at the very least should be open to turning to new sources of order.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
06-05-2019 04:00 AM
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Post: #47
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
Hi, there are several ways to strengthen the psyche, to prepare a person for various situations that cause most people with weak. unprepared psyche - panic, fear, anxiety, anxiety and other similar reactions. These methods are based on such things as: stress is necessary for mental training, faith is necessary for stabilization of the mental state, knowledge and intelligence are necessary for mental stability and strength, physical fitness is also intended for mental training, because it also creates stress for organism.
06-05-2019 08:44 AM
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godfather dust Away
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Post: #48
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
I got deep into being a "psychonaut" at one point smoking PCP several times a week, dropping 1000 hits of acid in a summer etc and got committed to an institution (I've posted about this before.) I had a good time but not worth it overall.

(Funny story: one time during the summer I did 1000 hits of acid I walked into a liquor store and tried to pay for beer with acid tabs. I'll post some of my experiences during this time at some point.)

I don't trip at all anymore.
06-05-2019 11:20 PM
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Post: #49
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
(06-05-2019 11:20 PM)godfather dust Wrote:  I got deep into being a "psychonaut" at one point smoking PCP several times a week, dropping 1000 hits of acid in a summer etc and got committed to an institution (I've posted about this before.) I had a good time but not worth it overall.

That explains the name "godfather dust." PCP will get you institutionalized if you're making it a lifestyle choice. Especially smoking it.

I mean I will also note here too that "psychonaut" really means the disciplined use of mind-altering substances for the purpose of exploring different realms of space and mind.

Doing PCP multiple times a week is really just being addicted to PCP. It's something I've also done and it was 100% worth it for me personally, but I was snorting a PCP analogue so I had an easy time controlling the intensity of the experience.

(06-05-2019 11:20 PM)godfather dust Wrote:  (Funny story: one time during the summer I did 1000 hits of acid I walked into a liquor store and tried to pay for beer with acid tabs. I'll post some of my experiences during this time at some point.)

I don't trip at all anymore.

I'm assuming you did that 1,000 hits across the summer without letting yourself get a tolerance break. I can see why you don't trip anymore.

Doing acid very regularly personally makes for an experience that is not too profound and is more physically uncomfortable than anything. It also feels like it's disrespectful to the experience.

It's easier to keep the magic with infrequent, heavy use. But many people also have a built-in mileage ceiling for tripping that, once they cross, makes tripping not worth it anymore.

PapayaTapper Wrote:you seem to have a penchant for sticking your dick in high drama retarded trash.
06-06-2019 10:51 AM
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Beyond Borders Away
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Post: #50
RE: The Ultimate Psychonaut Lounge - For Those Who Are Serious
Can anyone recommend good books for experiences with altered states of consciousness that are not drug-induced?

Nothing against psychedelics whatsoever and I want to experiment with them more, but legal consequences where I live here are harsh, and not only do I think that's not worth it but it'd mess with my trip. I'm also just curious about the non-induced path to these types of experiences, even if it's more difficult and less intense.

Great thread.

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To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
06-06-2019 01:08 PM
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