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Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
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Post: #51
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-09-2019 11:52 PM)Zenta Wrote:  I hope posting facebook links here is allowed. Just thought I'd share this link as it was just sent to me by a chick and its about older gentlemen with younger women in successful relationships if you check the comment section, many pictures and stories. Granted alot of them look like cucks but plenty of them look happy with their much younger wives who seem to match them. I didn't look too deep but only saw a handful of dudes batting out their SMV.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=315231432458456

I know this is a fellow forum member with a stache like that. (34 & 51)

I agree with others, the girl in that picture is heinous, even for an Asian. Also what's impressive about getting a 34 year old even if you're 50? (maybe I don't understand because I'm still far away from 50). I'm pretty sure I'll be able to get a girl like that well into my 70's. If I'm 50 and settle down with a girl like that, I'll look back on my younger years and know I fucked up. I think this thread is more about if a 40-50 year old can get a 25 year old who is still in her prime.
(This post was last modified: 05-10-2019 09:41 AM by travolta.)
05-10-2019 09:39 AM
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Post: #52
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-09-2019 11:24 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  
(05-09-2019 01:24 AM)CleanSlate Wrote:  Am I the only one who noticed the irony about age gaps here?

(a bunch of brilliant shit)

It is not even the age gap, it is the toxic mentality of life getting worse with age and the helpless attitude towards it as well as shoving young men into marriage in their 20s. They are literally trying to rob younger guys of the prime years, it's pathetic.

I thought I was the only one losing my head but apparently not, you just put it in a much better way than I could. I also tried to fight nature but the truth is, there are winners and losers in life. There are the Dan Bilzerians, Hugh Hefners (RIP), and true playboys who make it and then there are the rest of the guys who speak louder than anything about how miserable life is as you get older and how you have no options.

There's a sort of delusion going on in the manosphere about men's SMV peaking in late 30's and the ability to consistently pull younger girls throughout your entire male life.

Guy's will all contribute their examples of how they are in their 30's, 40's and 50's and still pulling teenagers.

I'm in my late 20's. I have a buddy who is in his mid 30's. Both of us regularly pull barely legal girls. However both of us have a unique situation. We both have good looks and look at least five years younger. We're both outliers in terms of financial freedom, life experience, social media marketing, and looks. So I would never come on a message board and tell guys: "It's easy to do it, me and my buddy are going to be swimming in young cooch for the next decade!" Ultimately, your own SMV is not going to be decided by random men on a message board.

There's no difference between men pointing to apex players like Dan Bizerian/Hugh Hefner and women saying that Christie Brinkley/Heidi Klum are still hot in their fifties.

I wonder how many true "at bats" that these guys are getting who claim to be pulling 15+ year age gaps regularly, because if you are getting at the table regularly, you start to notice situations with your age:

Your dating profiles start to get likes from only late twenties women.

She becomes that girl in her circle who is dating "the old guy"

She gives a slight wince when you mention your age.

She wonders what her parents are going to say.

She consistently dates large age gaps.

I just don't see 15-30 year age gaps in the US with young 7+ women working long term. There are too many negative social influences from her friends, family, and the media.

It's also stupid to say that men peak at a certain age. Everyone's peak is different. I realize that my SMV peak is probably going to be from 27-31 with the combination of social intelligence, travels, financial success, and holding on to my looks. But the guy who loses half his hair at my age and can't utilize social media is not going to peak at that age, no matter how good his game and money gets.

You see large age gaps much more often in cities like NYC or LA. That's because NYC and LA have by far the largest amount of male outliers in the form of fame, centa millionaires, nightclub moguls, etc.

I'm also not trying to say that you don't get more attractive as you age. I'm so much more attractive than I was five or six years ago. However young women live in a world of social acceptability and the truth is that it's not socially acceptable to date a man 15-25 years older unless he's an outlier in status/looks/money.

Can a 40-60 year old charm the pants off of a young woman? Plate her? Certainly. But she's not going to be flashing him around to her friends and on her social media. It's not socially acceptable to do so.

My advice to anyone that would like to settle down with an 18-23 year old woman. Do so within a year or two of your first significant financial success (175k+ income). Because of social norms, it gets exponentially harder as you enter your 30's and especially 40's. Don't listen to Rollo's SMV chart where you peak at age 38 years old. The only way a man peaks at the age of 38 (in the US with 18-23 y/o) is with fame or life changing, seven to eight figure money.

I built this empire and I did it by myself. Nobody did it for me. Not Ivana, not Marla. Nobody! ~Donald Trump
05-10-2019 10:30 AM
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Post: #53
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 09:39 AM)travolta Wrote:  I agree with others, the girl in that picture is heinous, even for an Asian. Also what's impressive about getting a 34 year old even if you're 50? (maybe I don't understand because I'm still far away from 50). I'm pretty sure I'll be able to get a girl like that well into my 70's. If I'm 50 and settle down with a girl like that, I'll look back on my younger years and know I fucked up. I think this thread is more about if a 40-50 year old can get a 25 year old who is still in her prime.

To be fair, the poster did mention that most of them seemed to be a match and the guys weren't batting above their expected average - so maybe the pic was just an example of that?

Pretty much what you tend to see on the ground too.

Beyond All Seas

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To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
(This post was last modified: 05-10-2019 10:34 AM by Beyond Borders.)
05-10-2019 10:30 AM
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Post: #54
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
I'll also post another anecdote of the "player lifestyle" in NYC.

I'm related to a guy, about 60 years old now. He's worth $10-20 million, retired 10 years, great looks, tall, looks much younger, top notch game and lifestyle.

I've known him for nearly 30 years. He's committed to the "player life." Serial monogamy with occasional cheating, one night stands in between relationships, etc. I'd put him in the top 5% of men his age, easily.

I used to think he was so cool, his lifelong player life, the way he went from woman to woman without committment. But then once I took the red pill and looked at his dating history, he had only one market: early to late 30's 6-8 woman looking for commitment. I realized that in the sample period that I was looking at (40-60 yr old extremely good looking game aware multimillionaire), he never cracked the top shelf of women. He got in one LTR with a 28 year old 6 when he was about 50. Good pull, but not exactly motivating to continue the player lifestyle into my 40's and 50's if I have the ability to lock down a 20 year old 8 right now, a market I've never seen him get.

That market, that early to late 30's market looking for commitment will pretty much always be available to a high value self improving male. A hot 20 year old will not.

I built this empire and I did it by myself. Nobody did it for me. Not Ivana, not Marla. Nobody! ~Donald Trump
05-10-2019 10:57 AM
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Post: #55
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
Really good thread so far. From my own experience, I've been able to get way hotter (and younger) girls as I've entered my 30's. Similar to what Graft said, I'm also not like the average early 30's guy, because I've had location independent income for the past 7 years, take great care of my health and have interesting hobbies. I've been in scarcity mode lately because every year it gets increasingly more difficult to make money online, and I get random injuries from my sport which always make me think hard about my mortality. If not for my current situation of location independence + health (luckily, both which are mostly in my control), I honestly think I'd be screwed as far as ladies go. I see some of my buddies from college- they're married and have kids with average looking broads, but they're pretty average themselves.

I'm not going to start going out wife hunting, but going forward I'm going to be way more selective with the women I keep in my life and ease up on casual sex. I'm also going to be a bit more selective with where I live.. if you live in NYC then you'll generally be stuck with career women/party whores.

rooshvforum wins the internet today, +1 for this thread
05-10-2019 11:50 AM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
I dunno, Graft - no offense and I respect your input and experiences - but you make it sound like "locking down" a girl from this elusive market you speak of is going to preserve her in time or something. While that old player is 60 and with a girl in her late 30s, your hot 20 year old will be older than 50 when you hit 60...

Not that the old playboy's life is ideal, but you'll probably have lost much attraction to her long, long ago at that point anyways.

Personally, I don't like to hyperfocus on numbers (6, 7, 8s, etc). I've always thought that rating stuff is pretty silly - if your broad turns heads in most any room she walks into, you're probably doing alright. And it seems like you keep making it a point to toss in what people in the US or NYC or LA do or want out of life as if it should carry extra weight...

For me, what those people in those place think means nothing. Just live your life, I say. Fug what other people think.

Don't get me wrong, doesn't matter to me what age a guy settles down at and under what terms. So no real dog in this fight that seems to be emerging on the topic. I'm more the live and let live type. And yeah, maybe if more young people did want to settle down earlier, society would be much better off...

But purely in terms of life enjoyment and attraction, and all these numbers and rationalizations you guys are throwing around, I'd much rather start off with a 20 year old "7" (or whatever you want to call it) when I'm almost 40 and always be nearly 2 decades ahead of her in age. Meaning she'll probably ALWAYS still look young and hot, at least to my wrinkled ass, no matter how old we get.

AND I had a damn good stretch of fun before meeting her...? Hey, not too shabby a deal if you ask me.

If you're in your late 20s, on the other hand, it'll be about 5 years, maybe a little longer, before you realize this 8 is aging as fast as you are and start wondering if maybe you shouldn't have held off.

And hate or love the 60 year old player and his sex life, he had a 30 year ride that a guy who settles down in his late 20s would miss out on all to snag a girl a point or so higher on some imaginary scale and to please the social medias and the gossipers and status chasers. And everyone has their own priorities - so not prescribing his path as something to aim for (obviously I'm not, based on my post about my own situation)...just the logic doesn't compute for me under these terms.

I personally just want to live my life and enjoy it. I come from a small town, so some people from back home see my young Filipina posting pics all over social media (not a problem for a girl here, whatsoever, fortunately) and are surely judging and sometimes taking little "sarcastic" social media jabs, but I could really care less. Ironically, it's usually miserable men I grew up with who are rationalizing their life decisions/failures (and their aging fat hog of a wife who bosses them around) rather than women, though I'm sure that'd be different if I was a little older.

Don't really care what any of them think, though. The older I get the more that is true.

NYC? LA? Those people don't decide what's important to me either. I'd rather be wandering these hills on my moto than strutting around the clubs of New York. Picking at the guitar on my balcony while the sun's coming down over the jungle. Island hopping my tiny little boat, one that wouldn't impress anyone even if I wanted it to, around the tropical bays and bailing out for a random kick around the coral.

By 50 I want a nice chunk of island somewhere, a solid group of male friends who "get it," some sturdy sons wrestling in the front yard or climbing a tree to grab me a fresh coconut, and a slim and petite 30 year old wife still aging well and keeping me well satisfied.

Not impressive pics of how hot my woman used to be back 20 years ago when I first snagged her.

We'll see what happens though (time will make fools of us all eventually)...

I think a lot of guys would be happier settling down younger. But waiting until your older has its perks too, if you ask me.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
(This post was last modified: 05-10-2019 01:17 PM by Beyond Borders.)
05-10-2019 12:23 PM
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Post: #57
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
There are a lot of other factors as well. I always advise men to steer clear of dumb chicks or women with health problems no matter how hot they are. Women with shitty families. All those red flags are relevant and should affect whether you choose the 7 with good overall family and genetics or the 8 who's a steaming pile of genetic and social trash in every field other than looks.

Find me a woman in her 30's no matter how hot who isn't married and I'll show you a woman with a cuck father and cunt mother, and guess what, half of those genes are going into your future kids.

Personally it's hard for me to see beyond my own sleepy country region. Out here the 18 year old girls are polite, diligent, feminine and full of life in a way that makes their city counterparts look dead-eyed and soulless. They dress respectably (if only by today's standards) and keep their hair long and in its natural colour. They range from puppy-fat to stick thin. 5's, 6's and 7's without a lick of make-up, which means in the city they'd be 6's, 7's and 8's with tinder profiles that made them look like 7's, 8's and 9's.

And no, it doesn't matter what your income or your game is like. As keen as they are to get married and have kids they're not settling for a guy who's ten years away from having liver spots.

Maybe 40 year old dudes have a fair crack at hot, young women elsewhere but to me it sounds just the same as the women thinking they can jump off the carousel at 40 themselves.

It always comes back to "well Sally had a friend who got married to a multi-millionaire when she was was forty-two..."

As for preferring those 25 year old girls over 18 year old ones, well again it's going to depend on the location. At least in the West the second a girl gets on the carousel it's game over. She's wrecked and you're never going to measure up to Tyrone and Chad no matter what your game is like or what TRT you're on. The 18 year old might seem like a naive idiot but she's not there to debate the finer points of mankind's endeavors with you. She's there to look at you starry-eyed while you tell her about them. That and make/raise kids, which an extra 7 years spent drunk getting fucked by Chads and working for Steins is not going to aid in the slightest.

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
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05-10-2019 12:57 PM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 12:23 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  I dunno, Graft - no offense and I respect your input and experiences - but you make it sound like "locking down" a girl from this elusive market you speak of is going to preserve her in time or something. While that old player is 60 and with a girl in her late 30s, your hot 20 year old will be older than 50 when you hit 60...

Not that the old playboy's life is ideal, but you'll probably have lost much attraction to her long, long ago at that point anyways.

Personally, I don't like to hyperfocus on numbers (6, 7, 8s, etc). I've always thought that rating stuff is pretty silly - if your broad turns heads in most any room she walks into, you're probably doing alright. And it seems like you keep making it a point to toss in what people in the US or NYC or LA do or want out of life as if it should carry extra weight...

For me, what those people in those place think means nothing. Just live your life, I say. Fug what other people think.

Don't get me wrong, doesn't matter to me what age a guy settles down at and under what terms. So no real dog in this fight that seems to be emerging on the topic. I'm more the live and let live type. And yeah, maybe if more young people did want to settle down earlier, society would be much better off...

But purely in terms of life enjoyment and attraction, and all these numbers and rationalizations you guys are throwing around, I'd much rather start off with a 20 year old "7" (or whatever you want to call it) when I'm almost 40 and always be nearly 2 decades ahead of her in age. Meaning she'll probably ALWAYS still look young and hot, at least to my wrinkled ass, no matter how old we get.

AND I had a damn good stretch of fun before meeting her...? Hey, not too shabby a deal if you ask me.

If you're in your late 20s, on the other hand, it'll be about 5 years, maybe a little longer, before you realize this 8 is aging as fast as you are and start wondering if maybe you shouldn't have held off.

And hate or love the 60 year old player and his sex life, he had a 30 year ride that a guy who settles down in his late 20s would miss out on all to snag a girl a point or so higher on some imaginary scale and to please the social medias and the gossipers and status chasers. And everyone has their own priorities - so not prescribing his path as something to aim for (obviously I'm not, based on my post about my own situation)...just the logic doesn't compute for me under these terms.

I personally just want to live my life and enjoy it. I come from a small town, so some people from back home see my young Filipina posting pics all over social media (not a problem for a girl here, whatsoever, fortunately) and are surely judging and sometimes taking little "sarcastic" social media jabs, but I could really care less. Ironically, it's usually miserable men I grew up with who are rationalizing their life decisions/failures (and their aging fat hog of a wife who bosses them around) rather than women, though I'm sure that'd be different if I was a little older.

Don't really care what any of them think, though. The older I get the more that is true.

NYC? LA? Those people don't decide what's important to me either. I'd rather be wandering these hills on my moto than strutting around the clubs of New York. Picking at the guitar on my balcony while the sun's coming down over the jungle. Island hopping my tiny little boat, one that wouldn't impress anyone even if I wanted it to, around the tropical bays and bailing out for a random kick around the coral.

By 50 I want a nice chunk of island somewhere, a solid group of male friends who "get it," some sturdy sons wrestling in the front yard or climbing a tree to grab me a fresh coconut, and a slim and petite 30 year old wife still aging well and keeping me well satisfied.

Not impressive pics of how hot my woman used to be back 20 years ago when I first snagged her.

We'll see what happens though (time will make fools of us all eventually)...

I think a lot of guys would be happier settling down younger. But waiting until your older has its perks too, if you ask me.

Good points. I'll just comment on a few.

That 30 year "ride" that you're talking about= double digit LTRs with chicks in their thirties 6-7 range. I think he pulled one 8 that was around 35. And this is a guy pretty close to the top shelf. (He'd be top shelf if he was worth 50-100 mm instead of 10-20)

In terms of a "ride," I'd rather have a few years in my twenties of pulling young hot peak chicks. His market doesn't even exist to me.

I just question the viability of pulling a 20 year age gap in the US for a wife. The link that was posted before showed a bunch of average looking hoes. Not women that have top options in their age range.

Personally I'd probably be much happier pulling a hottie with a 7-10 year age gap right now than pulling a 35 year old when I'm 60 and having to live with IVF and the fact that her entire sexual value was wasted on other men.

I built this empire and I did it by myself. Nobody did it for me. Not Ivana, not Marla. Nobody! ~Donald Trump
05-10-2019 01:48 PM
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Question RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 12:57 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Maybe 40 year old dudes have a fair crack at hot, young women elsewhere but to me it sounds just the same as the women thinking they can jump off the carousel at 40 themselves.

It always comes back to "well Sally had a friend who got married to a multi-millionaire when she was was forty-two..."

As for preferring those 25 year old girls over 18 year old ones, well again it's going to depend on the location. At least in the West the second a girl gets on the carousel it's game over. She's wrecked and you're never going to measure up to Tyrone and Chad no matter what your game is like or what TRT you're on. The 18 year old might seem like a naive idiot but she's not there to debate the finer points of mankind's endeavors with you. She's there to look at you starry-eyed while you tell her about them. That and make/raise kids, which an extra 7 years spent drunk getting fucked by Chads and working for Steins is not going to aid in the slightest.

I'm actually dying over here LMAO. Quote for fucking truth. Would rep you again if I could.

I built this empire and I did it by myself. Nobody did it for me. Not Ivana, not Marla. Nobody! ~Donald Trump
05-10-2019 01:54 PM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 10:30 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  To be fair, the poster did mention that most of them seemed to be a match and the guys weren't batting above their expected average - so maybe the pic was just an example of that?

Pretty much what you tend to see on the ground too.

This right here. I understand the confusion of my post since I added that picture afterwards. Most of the couples on there looked like it was simply a green card marriage or if they were like that guy they were a decent match, very rare to actually see someone batting out their SMV. But then again its Facebook, The type of dude that has a young chick worth bragging about is probably busying banging her and not posting on a older male/younger female thread on FB.
05-10-2019 07:10 PM
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Post: #61
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 01:48 PM)Graft Wrote:  Personally I'd probably be much happier pulling a hottie with a 7-10 year age gap right now than pulling a 35 year old when I'm 60 and having to live with IVF and the fact that her entire sexual value was wasted on other men.

I can agree with you there!

Good discussion anyhow all around. Solid thread.

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"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
(This post was last modified: 05-10-2019 08:40 PM by Beyond Borders.)
05-10-2019 08:32 PM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 07:10 PM)Zenta Wrote:  
(05-10-2019 10:30 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  To be fair, the poster did mention that most of them seemed to be a match and the guys weren't batting above their expected average - so maybe the pic was just an example of that?

Pretty much what you tend to see on the ground too.

This right here. I understand the confusion of my post since I added that picture afterwards. Most of the couples on there looked like it was simply a green card marriage or if they were like that guy they were a decent match, very rare to actually see someone batting out their SMV. But then again its Facebook, The type of dude that has a young chick worth bragging about is probably busying banging her and not posting on a older male/younger female thread on FB.

Yeah, what really shocks me is how many white guys out here in Asia (even young and handsome ones) you actually see dating down. In terms of looks AND character! A lot of guys suggest this is a new phenomenon, but it's been my observation since first getting out here 12 or so years ago.

I guess men who've got it figured out are a rarity pretty much anywhere in the world...

Heading to Asia is an option but no panacea.

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To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
(This post was last modified: 05-10-2019 09:23 PM by Beyond Borders.)
05-10-2019 08:35 PM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 12:57 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  And no, it doesn't matter what your income or your game is like. As keen as they are to get married and have kids they're not settling for a guy who's ten years away from having liver spots.

Maybe 40 year old dudes have a fair crack at hot, young women elsewhere but to me it sounds just the same as the women thinking they can jump off the carousel at 40 themselves.

My observation is that a lot of them want a guy who is slightly older than them. What they have in their head is about 4 years but as usual feelings take precedence so there's quite a bit of wiggle room in there. What actually matters is whether your age/situation/personality as such are going to cause a positive or negative reaction from her social circle. I suspect you could get away with being a tad older if the family thinks you're a good catch for her.
05-10-2019 09:08 PM
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Leonard D Neubache
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Post: #64
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 12:23 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  I personally just want to live my life and enjoy it. I come from a small town, so some people from back home see my young Filipina posting pics all over social media (not a problem for a girl here, whatsoever, fortunately) and are surely judging and sometimes taking little "sarcastic" social media jabs, but I could really care less. Ironically, it's usually miserable men I grew up with who are rationalizing their life decisions/failures (and their aging fat hog of a wife who bosses them around) rather than women, though I'm sure that'd be different if I was a little older.

Don't really care what any of them think, though. The older I get the more that is true.

For me its about living the life. The quantify everything hyper-optimization wank misses this point.

A man's value increases over time as long as he is active and his activity builds value. A woman's value on her own is vested in her fertility signalling. Beyond these two general trends and the hard facts of biology, there are many things an active man can do. Yes there's cultural baggage and there's retarded nu-cultural noise, but power lies with men who are active.

Age gaps are cool. Serial monogamy can be cool. The long term companionship of a good woman (or 5) who supports your mission is very cool, but takes a lot of dating and sleeping around in the course of discovering what a good woman is.
05-10-2019 09:47 PM
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MrLemon Offline
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Post: #65
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-08-2019 08:12 PM)travolta Wrote:  At 31 I'm definitely getting tired of the player lifestyle, but still feel too young to start having kids.

This is the perfect time for you to have kids. All the girls you game after this age will bore you. On the other hand, if you find a wife, enjoy her alone for oh, say, 2-3 years, then have a kid at 35, you will discover a part of your manhood that will make everything up until that moment seem puny by comparison.

There is nothing in this world like the feeling of watching over and protecting your children.

But, you gotta be ready to feed and shelter them.
05-10-2019 11:31 PM
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Trumpian Offline
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Post: #66
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-10-2019 12:57 PM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  Personally it's hard for me to see beyond my own sleepy country region.

I think that's the cognizant dissonance here. Most of the membership doesn't live in sleepy country towns - nor would want to. Any rural area is going to see most of the young women married off, and it's slim pickings after that.


Quote:If I'm going to settle down, I'd like a woman more sophisticated than that.
Maybe 40 year old dudes have a fair crack at hot, young women elsewhere but to me it sounds just the same as the women thinking they can jump off the carousel at 40 themselves.

It always comes back to "well Sally had a friend who got married to a multi-millionaire when she was was forty-two..."

The situation for 40yr old men and 40 yr old women is not remotely comparable. Pretty laughable to suggest it. Biologically one is capable of producing healthy children and with the other its something most doctors would advise against.

But sure - it wouldn't be smart for any 40yr old to move the boonies in hopes of finding a much younger wife. Hell, it wouldn't be smart for most younger men. Why put yourself in a pussy dessert? I mean if you're already a family man or over 60 I could see the appeal of it. That aside, the issue in rural spots isn't so much age it's the fact you're an outsider, and she's been with the same guys since childhood. Tough to penetrate those social circles.
05-10-2019 11:46 PM
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Leonard D Neubache Offline
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Post: #67
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
You'd be surprised on most of those counts.

So if it's so damn different for men at 40 than women then why isn't the forum flush with 40 year old guys jumping off with a stellar young woman? Why are some of the forum's top players with notch counts north of 100 having trouble locking down a quality breeder?

Your logical conclusions don't trump observable reality.

As for the young women here, they're not in arranged marriages and are largely treading water because the young men have gone off to live the player lifestyle and the 25-30 year old guys aren't getting off the cunt carousel or are also simply too juvenile to start a family yet.

This is why I say 25 to 30 tops is the time to get out. A decent 18 year old will still settle for you but if you're going to be racing her own father to the retirement home then forget about it. You missed the shot clock and no stable tribe wants a father in their ranks that will be geriatric by the time the grandkids arrive.

You can start a new family tree from the ground up somewhere foreign or with a girl that's been cast to the wind but you have to understand that it's simply a lesser form of modern degeneracy, no matter what masculiberal nu-ethics you apply.

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
05-11-2019 12:49 AM
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lunchmoney Offline
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Post: #68
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
The biggest danger I see for a successful guy in his late 30s/40 settling down is vetting a girl to ensure you don't potentially lose half of what you have worked for all your life.
05-11-2019 03:08 AM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
As a follow up - 3 of my 7 closest friends married in their 20s and are divorced. None said they would re-marry. 1 is paying child support to his ex, 1 has a kid and his ex remarried, the 3rd is trying to tinder date.
05-11-2019 03:09 AM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
Leonard, my ancestors were Colonists that already 350 years ago fucked SEA local girls and produced offspring leading to me. Should’t be too degenerate right? I would do the same as my forefathers. Just I dont know whether i could live in a 3rd world country. Prefer developed country like Spain.
(This post was last modified: 05-11-2019 04:17 AM by Lime.)
05-11-2019 04:16 AM
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Post: #71
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
I know that people are probably going to take what I posted the wrong way in as much as assuming degenerate = interracial.

I was inferring degenerate = one or both sides of the union having no family ties and existing as a functional sapling of a family tree rather than a branch of an existing family tree. Alternately that you, the man, are submitting to your wife's family tree rather than vice versa.

If this concept seems nuanced then it can be made quite simple. Who will your children be calling grandpa and grandma, and in what language's terms will they be calling them that?

I had and Oma and an Opa. I am therefore claimed under my German ancestry. Who will your children be claimed by?

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
(This post was last modified: 05-11-2019 04:31 AM by Leonard D Neubache.)
05-11-2019 04:27 AM
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Trumpian Offline
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Post: #72
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
Quote:So if it's so damn different for men at 40 than women then why isn't the forum flush with 40 year old guys jumping off with a stellar young woman? Why are some of the forum's top players with notch counts north of 100 having trouble locking down a quality breeder?

The forum isn't flush with young guys in their 20s locking down an 18yr old for marriage. Granted - most don't want it. Aside from playing the pussy carousel, they're conscious of the fact that marriage & kids is a financial death sentence in the West for a young man unless mum and dad are bankrolling it, and helping look after the kids.

Quote:Your logical conclusions don't trump observable reality.

It's a very small pool you're observing. I'm going to get flack for this but having met up with quite a number of members, there is common theme of either social awkwardness, lack of fitness, or limited bankroll (or a combination of these factors). Whether you're 25 or 40, these areas need to be sorted to be competitive in the modern dating market.

If you're truly an above average man it's not quite the doomsday scenario that's being bandied about. Far from it.The trouble is guys aren't honest with themselves about areas they're lacking in.

Quote:As for the young women here, they're not in arranged marriages and are largely treading water because the young men have gone off to live the player lifestyle and the 25-30 year old guys aren't getting off the cunt carousel or are also simply too juvenile to start a family yet.

Australia must be wildly different from the US then. Because in rural America, the young women leave in the same proportion as the young men. Maybe even moreso. While rural guys can get decent paying blue collar jobs usually, an uneducated girl is stuck flipping pancakes at Denny's.


Quote:You can start a new family tree from the ground up somewhere foreign or with a girl that's been cast to the wind but you have to understand that it's simply a lesser form of modern degeneracy, no matter what masculiberal nu-ethics you apply.

I was waiting for it lol.

I'd call it reverse globalization. While the rural blue-collar types and middle class bemoan their lack of jobs and have basically become professional victims, others accept that in the game of life there's a new rulebook - and we play to win.

I couldn't live in Vietnam pre-globalization. I'm able to maintain a luxurious lifestyle at 25-50% what it would cost me back home. And I have a near unlimited supply of young asian women (who I genuinely prefer over the hefty framed 18yr old farmers daughters back home). So even though my politics lean nationalist, I've got to admit that I'm a beneficiary of globalization in many ways.

In my opinion, it beats the alternative - basically retreating from the world to somewhere rural in the hopes that your touch of paradise remains intact. That's been a losing strategy for a long time. Ie. White flight. And it's kind of defeatist really.

Either embrace and benefit from globalization OR have a Boston style tea party. With the latter, there's no guarantee it would work of course. But hiding away in the boonies will not stem the tide. That is guaranteed.
(This post was last modified: 05-11-2019 05:22 AM by Trumpian.)
05-11-2019 05:01 AM
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Post: #73
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-11-2019 04:27 AM)Leonard D Neubache Wrote:  I know that people are probably going to take what I posted the wrong way in as much as assuming degenerate = interracial.

I was inferring degenerate = one or both sides of the union having no family ties and existing as a functional sapling of a family tree rather than a branch of an existing family tree. Alternately that you, the man, are submitting to your wife's family tree rather than vice versa.

If this concept seems nuanced then it can be made quite simple. Who will your children be calling grandpa and grandma, and in what language's terms will they be calling them that?

I had and Oma and an Opa. I am therefore claimed under my German ancestry. Who will your children be claimed by?

That's an even a harsher definition of degeneracy then.

Pretty normal to come from a broken family these days. Very few Americans know their extended family well. I would agree that the breakdown of the nuclear family has been a catastrophe, and we should make all attempts to restore it. But I'd wager a majority of the membership does not have a "family tree" that'll be there to help with the child rearing. So yes, most likely my wife's family would have a major role. I have zero issue with that.
05-11-2019 05:10 AM
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RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
(05-11-2019 04:16 AM)Lime Wrote:  Leonard, my ancestors were Colonists that already 350 years ago fucked SEA local girls and produced offspring leading to me. Should’t be too degenerate right? I would do the same as my forefathers. Just I dont know whether i could live in a 3rd world country. Prefer developed country like Spain.

Good point. My ancestry is english/swedish - two groups which have been pillaging/settling distant lands and taking their women for over a thousand years.

It's in my blood.

The greatest tragedy of modernity and something that subconsciously creates angst in a lot of men is there are no more worlds to conquer. We prove our strength & prowess now by stacking paper. It's a poor substitute for winning a battle, as anybody who's won a fight (street, boxing or otherwise) can attest. Nothing makes a man feel more alive than that.
05-11-2019 05:45 AM
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Post: #75
RE: Dangers of "Settling Down" at 40+
Family tree. ha

I was born to a heroin addict mentally unstable shitstorm of a father, who was kicked out of his home at 14. He almost killed me when I was an infant, and he spent 10 years of my childhood in prison.

My ma was doing meth, selling coke, working at the bar. Could hear her scrogging random guys, loud and proud of it, late at night. Or bringing the party home after work to do rails in the living room until morning.

My brothers and I would often spend school nights walking out to politely (less so as the night went on) ask them to keep it down...or alternatively screaming "shut the fuck up" when her and her boyfriend were fighting at the top of their lungs until all hours of the morning. We'd go to school barely able to keep our eyes open.

I had to beat the shit out of one of her boyfriends when I was 14. He pulled a knife on me a year later, holding it poised over his head like a fucking lunatic, screaming at the top of his lungs, ready to drive it through my chest. I grabbed my mom and ran outside. Put her in her car and then I climbed on the bus and went to school.

She tried to take him back in the home again after that and it was only my stubborn ass threatening to leave and never come back that very day if she did that stopped her - she cried and screamed and called me every name in the book but I didn't back down and she knew I was serious.

I remember my shoes rotting away over the tops of my toes before we could get new ones - walking to the bus in the cold northern cali rains with my socks soaked...but more embarassed than anything - kids where I grew up were pretty moneyed. Going hungry watching teammates wolf down food after football games and wrestling tournaments - eventually having to quit because we just couldn't afford it.

Ma giving me a snarl and a "well don't expect me to help you" when I announced I was starting my first day of college (not that I'd asked for help). Yet she always had a full bottle of vodka sitting under the sink - you can bet your life on that.

My father got out when I was 17. I gave him my forgiveness and tried to get to know him, but he eventually went back to the drugs. The last time I talked to him I told him to stay away and leave my family alone. That he'd caused enough shit for us already. I'd risen up to be a bit of a caretaker for my family.

A year later, suicide by intentional overdose. My mom's brother overdosed on heroin a full handful of years later.

I could go on...

Still love my ma, and at least she doesn't do drugs anymore. But don't exactly want her spending a ton of time around my kids and don't want to sit around in Cali watching her drink herself to death.

The bottom of the economy has fallen out from under the town I grew up since weed went legal, and bodies are showing up left and right (literally) and everyone I grew up with is losing everything they ever knew. An entire way of life has come to an end, and shit changes, so it is what it is.

Those who know how to adapt (or leave) will find a way.

And regardless of all that pesimmistic memory I just dropped, I seriously love life and a lot of the experiences I've had.

So what's my point then?

I don't feel sorry for myself, so it's not that. And I support guys who want to carry on their lineage and the traditions of those who came before us.

But if I'm a degenerate for doing my own thing and not having much of a family tree, so be it.

I'm sure plenty other men have stories with at least hints of mine (many a lot worse) or otherwise grew up feeling abandoned and alone and a little bit lost. For some of us, just getting through without turning into the men who raised us was an accomplishment in itself.

As much as I love good ole' white boys as much as the rest of you (and want to see them continuing to take their balls back), I don't remember too many being there to offer an encouraging word or guidance when I needed it either. I remember a lot of them being actual degenerates and laughing about it.

Or the ones trying to shit on me and act better when I had nothing. And a lot of them trying to stab me in the back once I changed that and had enough for them to get a little envious - or just over a women. Yeah, there's always that one.

Not a lot of loyalty or brotherhood that I can see to be had among a lot of white American men these days.

So, I wish them luck, and I'll continue to treat them with the goodwill I give to all men, but I certainly don't owe anybody anything. And most definietly don't owe anything to my "family tree."

I think society needs two type of people to function normally and evolve. The gatekeepers, or people who keep shit running. Fucking love em'.

And the pioneers.

The guys who decide they want to try something different and have the balls to uproot and relocate and try again. even if it means being a world away and often felling outnumbered and alone.

But eventually forging a foothold that truly belongs to them.

I'm not trying to sell either as the right way. Neither is better, if you ask me.

But each of these types serve an important function for mankind, and healthy cultural evolution.

And you should at least know, without apology, which one is you.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
(This post was last modified: 05-11-2019 07:55 AM by Beyond Borders.)
05-11-2019 06:56 AM
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