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Return to Life
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Arturbala Offline
Male Feminist

Posts: 10
Joined: Apr 2018
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Post: #1
Return to Life
So why I name this thread/journal like this? BC last 10 years or so I lived in virtual space. Yea I went to school/university etc but after that I spend all my time in Internet (social media, videogames). I fucked up my vision, became super skinny.

Gamewise: ironically in school/uni days I've been aloof/hard to get and this make girls attracted to me. I liked to make fun of them in a good way so they laugh. Or sometimes I make hard joke.. they get insulted.. verbally attack me. Then my director told me to apologize so I did and then one girl says "you're not a jerk? too bad i like jerks" hahaha. I never been a nice guy BUT i didn't escalate and close, although there is plenty of opportunities. Right now I'm more social and return to my older self (aloof). Being PUA i feel like forcing myself onto the girl (re-approach, plowing etc) so I abandoned all this.

My main point is: I live with my mom. I don't care about that because this gives me opportunity to save money BUT I never worked and all this comes back to me living in virtual space for past 10 years. My adaptation to life is way off. All this PUA thing.. it was just a hobby. I approach and came back to my internet life, never get a job or engage in REAL life. This was a big mistake that has effect now. I think what this effect doing is creating everyday new guilt/fear that my mom is STILL providing fpr me (grow ass man).

My family and all this girls from my early childhood/teen years made my ego so BIG by saying "omg you are so handsome" that later in life I caring about that image and don't want to working on low-tier job because they would see me working there... It's so fuckeeeeeed up.

Writing all this... is crushing my ego but I need to look honestly at myself. Not lying to myself. If anybody who had same experience or simply want to give advice please write here. I want to change all this because I feeling like I wasting my life away.

That I want:
- Get a job.
- Make my social life more interesting and get in relationship (new rules haha)
- Use internet as a tool. Live IRL.
(This post was last modified: 05-27-2019 12:09 PM by Arturbala.)
05-27-2019 12:08 PM
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thot_slayer Offline
Banned

Posts: 14
Joined: Mar 2019
Post: #2
RE: Return to Life
I think this belongs in the Newbie forum.
05-27-2019 12:41 PM
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Arturbala Offline
Male Feminist

Posts: 10
Joined: Apr 2018
Reputation: 0
Post: #3
RE: Return to Life
(05-27-2019 12:41 PM)thot_slayer Wrote:  I think this belongs in the Newbie forum.

Fuck, yes. Moderators please move this thread to newbie forum or explain how can I move it. Sorry
05-27-2019 12:54 PM
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Arturbala Offline
Male Feminist

Posts: 10
Joined: Apr 2018
Reputation: 0
Post: #4
RE: Return to Life
Totally came to conclusion that I have to grew up.

My plan is get a job and save money. Dont spend on anything. Gonna do it for 1year. Gamewise I hope that I can meet women in workplace/on my way to job/social circle etc. I think that finance should be my main focus rn because back in my pua days I sabotage myself by not approaching/going on date bc of lack money. Therefore I'm not fullfiled as a man.

Searching for a job.. there is resistance that I can make easy money but I understand that it's all bullshit. I should swallow my pride and get any fucking job, hopefully I can get momentum going. Fear of others people opinions is huge but I must get over it!
06-04-2019 11:22 AM
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Hombre de hielo Offline
Game Denialist

Posts: 74
Joined: Feb 2019
Reputation: 0
Post: #5
RE: Return to Life
At least here in Brazil, in the lower social classes, the man having a beautiful face only serves to take indirect from fat women.
06-04-2019 04:45 PM
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Arturbala Offline
Male Feminist

Posts: 10
Joined: Apr 2018
Reputation: 0
Post: #6
RE: Return to Life
What is it mean "serves to take indirect from fat women"? My english so bad haha, I kinda understand what you mean but not sure.
06-05-2019 09:36 AM
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