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Retiring from the game at 40?
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LoveBug Offline
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Retiring from the game at 40?
May be part of the aging process as I’ve turned 40 last August, but in terms of the desire for sex and the concept of it I’m becoming like I was when I was pre-pussy - aged 11-13 (when I began to enjoy the concept of women without the strong desire to procreate).

My testosterone may be a little on the lower end, specially as I take propecia and being on the “wrong” side of the big 4.0., but mentally I find myself becoming done with the chase, altogether.

The concept of getting laid holds little appeal, like it did just a few years back. In fact I think getting involved in ONS’s and STR’s results as a bit of a chore as the younger woman would sure to have a higher sex drive, and as I age I know my body more, perhaps more than any female. I also value my body and space a bit more than to chase around young women and compete with younger cats when I’m no longer at my top. Such as a basketball player retiring before they begin to perform at a level they aren’t personally happy with. When I was a teenager, and Married With Children was a hot show, me and my friends used to wonder why Al Bundy didn’t want to tap his wife, and it’s the cycle of things that I unfortunately know why, lol.

In terms of LTR, I refuse to settle in my standards, even as I lose SMV getting older. I still prefer young women who accessorize my life with positive traits who finish my own sentences without too much sexual history. Which rules out the West, but then there is the culture/generational barriers if I ever find her in Central America where I tend to stay. I think I’m able to retain my standards more than the average man as I’m naturally a loner, and have strong bonds with my mom/sister and a few friends so I’m not overly in need of any companionship

It’s to the point where at 40 I feel like I’m maybe retiring from the game. I think the lesson I would give young cats is it’s just not the SMV matters at 40, but your body/mind can change with that aging process, so do your thing.

I’m glad I can take part in the forum adhering to its new rules. I still like to discuss travel and the idea of coming across the perfect girl

There is something liberating about not having to worry about pussy for me. I’m proud of what happened in my prime. My dignity won’t allow me to compromise in anything long term with women, and I feel free becoming “post pussy”

There is always the outside shot that I come across a unicorn at my age, or, , as my own intimate social circle becomes less, my high standards will decrease in “need” of companionship. But even if I age and need more companionship I think there will always be ways of getting it without marriage and sacrificing my ideals (and the concept of marriage is serious to me, she should be your dream girl for me). And STR’s are all but losing appeal. So for now, I think I’m headed towards “retirement”
(This post was last modified: 06-10-2019 12:59 AM by LoveBug.)
06-10-2019 12:45 AM
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scotian Offline
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Post: #2
RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Sounds like you need to get on some TRT brah, it’s over-the-counter in Central America FYI.

God damned them all, I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold, we'd fire no guns-shed no tears, now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier, the last of Barrett's privateers!
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06-10-2019 01:46 PM
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
I'm not an incel I'm "post pussy"
06-10-2019 02:47 PM
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MyFabolousLife Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-10-2019 12:45 AM)LoveBug Wrote:  May be part of the aging process as I’ve turned 40 last August, but in terms of the desire for sex and the concept of it I’m becoming like I was when I was pre-pussy - aged 11-13 (when I began to enjoy the concept of women without the strong desire to procreate).

My testosterone may be a little on the lower end, specially as I take propecia and being on the “wrong” side of the big 4.0., but mentally I find myself becoming done with the chase, altogether.

The concept of getting laid holds little appeal, like it did just a few years back. In fact I think getting involved in ONS’s and STR’s results as a bit of a chore as the younger woman would sure to have a higher sex drive, and as I age I know my body more, perhaps more than any female.

I think men's tastes and preferences typically change over time, so it probably comes as little surprise to people that at age 40 you are not as interested in a casual fling or STR. But what's the alternative? A wife and kids?

The wife and kids model seems to be the theme that is being pushed hard under the new rules of this Forum and if a guy wants to go that route I certainly don't begrudge him. But most of the guys I know that are around my age (early to mid 30s) who took the marriage and children route are ALREADY MISERABLE. Except the key difference between You and them is they are stuck in their situation indefinitely as the henpecked hubby or until wifey hit's the divorce eject button.

I am in no way criticizing anyone who is married and/or has children but I fail to see what is so noble about this path. At least if you take it in the West. Your essentially transferring all power and control to the woman. Feminism and the divorce rape culture that exists in 2019 Western Culture was unspeakable during Biblical times. So you're basically applying an antiquated system (i.e. marriage) to modern times. As a result, women are largely receiving the benefits and power and men typically get very little out of the arrangement.
06-10-2019 03:52 PM
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UlugBeg Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Quite the opposite for me. Over 50 and recently divorced. My ex- was an absolute nympho. To the point where I actually was a little glad when she was on her period so I could get a full nights sleep. Now, with my pu$$y on demand shut down, I’m always horny AF. Think about women constantly. Flirt always. I’m fine with STR. Date younger women (I look young). Recently got on Tinder, which is working out well. I may have high T, I guess? Or maybe it’s something else.
(This post was last modified: 06-10-2019 06:31 PM by UlugBeg.)
06-10-2019 06:25 PM
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MyFabolousLife Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-10-2019 06:25 PM)UlugBeg Wrote:  Quite the opposite for me. Over 50 and recently divorced.

Recently got on Tinder, which is working out well. I may have high T, I guess? Or maybe it’s something else.

Are you located in a Major City and what is the age range of the women you are getting on Tinder?
06-10-2019 06:38 PM
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UlugBeg Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Major City. Youngest was 19.
06-10-2019 08:37 PM
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GreenHills Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
OP, 40 seems a bit early. How are your health habits and body health? At 40 you should still have desire for women.
06-11-2019 12:24 AM
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MyFabolousLife Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-10-2019 08:37 PM)UlugBeg Wrote:  Major City. Youngest was 19.

Impressive. You must have above average looks for a guy in your age bracket and I am guessing you're not in the SF Bay Area. My friends tell me its the Sahara Desert as far as women and online dating go in the Bay.

Any advice for the younger guys regarding marriage ... Was getting married even worth it? How do younger women react when they hear you're divorced, do they even care?
06-11-2019 11:32 AM
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Rorogue Online
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Delete
(This post was last modified: 06-11-2019 12:11 PM by Rorogue.)
06-11-2019 12:10 PM
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BroodingSea Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Why delete
06-11-2019 12:59 PM
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Crusader Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Good move. I would go for 30 though.

Crusader is writer and blogger based in London-Abad.
06-11-2019 03:32 PM
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UlugBeg Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
MyFabolousLife [1]


Been told I’m GL so...maybe.
Been to over 40 states. SF Area is the most unfriendly place I have ever been. No just OLD, but IRL. And not just dating.
Getting married was worth it. 80% was fantastic. If I were less Beta Blue Pilled, I think I could have saved the marriage. My advice on marriage- be aware. Never take it
for granted. One really has to work at it.
Younger women don’t seem to care I’m divorced.
(This post was last modified: 06-11-2019 04:40 PM by UlugBeg.)
06-11-2019 04:39 PM
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flyinghorse Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-10-2019 12:45 AM)LoveBug Wrote:  May be part of the aging process as I’ve turned 40 last August, but in terms of the desire for sex and the concept of it I’m becoming like I was when I was pre-pussy - aged 11-13 (when I began to enjoy the concept of women without the strong desire to procreate).

My testosterone may be a little on the lower end, specially as I take propecia and being on the “wrong” side of the big 4.0., but mentally I find myself becoming done with the chase, altogether.

The concept of getting laid holds little appeal, like it did just a few years back. In fact I think getting involved in ONS’s and STR’s results as a bit of a chore as the younger woman would sure to have a higher sex drive, and as I age I know my body more, perhaps more than any female. I also value my body and space a bit more than to chase around young women and compete with younger cats when I’m no longer at my top. Such as a basketball player retiring before they begin to perform at a level they aren’t personally happy with. When I was a teenager, and Married With Children was a hot show, me and my friends used to wonder why Al Bundy didn’t want to tap his wife, and it’s the cycle of things that I unfortunately know why, lol.

In terms of LTR, I refuse to settle in my standards, even as I lose SMV getting older. I still prefer young women who accessorize my life with positive traits who finish my own sentences without too much sexual history. Which rules out the West, but then there is the culture/generational barriers if I ever find her in Central America where I tend to stay. I think I’m able to retain my standards more than the average man as I’m naturally a loner, and have strong bonds with my mom/sister and a few friends so I’m not overly in need of any companionship

It’s to the point where at 40 I feel like I’m maybe retiring from the game. I think the lesson I would give young cats is it’s just not the SMV matters at 40, but your body/mind can change with that aging process, so do your thing.

I’m glad I can take part in the forum adhering to its new rules. I still like to discuss travel and the idea of coming across the perfect girl

There is something liberating about not having to worry about pussy for me. I’m proud of what happened in my prime. My dignity won’t allow me to compromise in anything long term with women, and I feel free becoming “post pussy”

There is always the outside shot that I come across a unicorn at my age, or, , as my own intimate social circle becomes less, my high standards will decrease in “need” of companionship. But even if I age and need more companionship I think there will always be ways of getting it without marriage and sacrificing my ideals (and the concept of marriage is serious to me, she should be your dream girl for me). And STR’s are all but losing appeal. So for now, I think I’m headed towards “retirement”

I relate to this and i'm only 33. I slept with a ton of people between 25 and 31 and for the past year I've hardly cared about getting notches anymore. I'll still sleep with someone when dating and hope it may turn into something worthwhile, but i'm not doing it for sex as an ends anymore.

I'm not sure if this is growing up or if its just reaching a new chapter. Its kind of like how binge drinking as a young man and having a wild night is awesome when you are young; but now its almost lost all its appeal. That's how it is with casual sex for some of us now.
06-12-2019 06:07 AM
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Rorogue Online
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
I feel the exact same way and I am 30.

Part of me feels it's a little bit much to have no interest in sex, but part of me realises that because I've been chasing lust my entire adult life, I haven't become a fully formed person. A type of man who can perform the role of a husband and father.

I looked at myself as purely a sex object, and all women as well.

I am not too worried. I will just roll with it and focus on God, my health, and my work
(This post was last modified: 06-13-2019 06:38 AM by Rorogue.)
06-13-2019 05:55 AM
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
In the first book of Plato's "Republic," one of the other characters asks Cerinthus what it's like to get old and lose his sex drive. He replies, "I have been freed from a mad and furious master."

Return Of Kings contributor and best-selling author of "On The Mason And Their Lies."
(This post was last modified: 06-13-2019 06:43 AM by MichaelWitcoff.)
06-13-2019 06:36 AM
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Rorogue Online
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Yes you're right. Mad and furious is exactly how I'd describe my inner world for the last 14 years.

The calm and equanimity of not being driven by lust is hard to get used to, but ultimately made rewarding.

I am currently in Bangkok for God's sakes, and all I want to do is visit the temples, have a couple of beers and write.

10 years ago I would be painting the town.

Part of me wants to scream out "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME!?", but as I said, I'll just roll with it.
(This post was last modified: 06-13-2019 06:43 AM by Rorogue.)
06-13-2019 06:41 AM
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Lundell Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
I'm looking forward to getting there, Rorogue. Nothing's wrong with you. Enjoy life my man.
06-13-2019 08:39 AM
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MikeS Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
Too young to be "post pussy" - post variety perhaps, but not with low or no need in general. I'm 42, lost my desire for nightlife years ago and switched to dating instead, and I now also prefer sex in relationships (up to a few years) - although on some vacations, when I'm single, I'll still try to... hug... as many women as I can get away it.
06-14-2019 10:18 AM
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MyFabolousLife Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-14-2019 10:18 AM)MikeS Wrote:  Too young to be "post pussy" - post variety perhaps, but not with low or no need in general. I'm 42, lost my desire for nightlife years ago and switched to dating instead, and I now also prefer sex in relationships (up to a few years) - although on some vacations, when I'm single, I'll still try to... hug... as many women as I can get away it.

This is a bit off topic but how have you been able to avoid marriage with these women you date?

I am not writing that as a joke but in all seriousness, given that you are in your 40s and have dated quite a few women, do they ever bring up marriage? If so, do you just break up/cut it off once they bring it up?Whip
06-14-2019 11:37 AM
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MikeS Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-14-2019 11:37 AM)MyFabolousLife Wrote:  
(06-14-2019 10:18 AM)MikeS Wrote:  Too young to be "post pussy" - post variety perhaps, but not with low or no need in general. I'm 42, lost my desire for nightlife years ago and switched to dating instead, and I now also prefer sex in relationships (up to a few years) - although on some vacations, when I'm single, I'll still try to... hug... as many women as I can get away it.

This is a bit off topic but how have you been able to avoid marriage with these women you date?

I am not writing that as a joke but in all seriousness, given that you are in your 40s and have dated quite a few women, do they ever bring up marriage? If so, do you just break up/cut it off once they bring it up?Whip

Despite being with many women since my late teens I have only been in a few relationships lasting more than a year, and only one of those women was someone I could actually imagine a future with. Unfortunately she didn't feel as strongly and the few years were were together were a bit rocky, including a couple of brief breakups (during which I tried getting over her by meeting as many other women as possible, and while that was often physically satisfying it certainly wasn't emotionally so).

It's only the last handful of years I've actually felt the inclination to "settle down", but obviously that's not going to happen without finding a woman I want and who wants me back - for the long term.

And "able to avoid marriage"? I'm not sure if you're meeting women in church (the closest I've ever come was meeting someone in a temple in Thailand), but no woman I've ever been with have ever overtly tried to push the question of marriage, even if there have been some vague talks about "where we're going" and what we expect from life some months into relationships.
(This post was last modified: 06-14-2019 01:10 PM by MikeS.)
06-14-2019 01:07 PM
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MyFabolousLife Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-14-2019 01:07 PM)MikeS Wrote:  
(06-14-2019 11:37 AM)MyFabolousLife Wrote:  [quote='MikeS' pid='1991648' dateline='1560525492']
Too young to be "post pussy" - post variety perhaps, but not with low or no need in general. I'm 42, lost my desire for nightlife years ago and switched to dating instead, and I now also prefer sex in relationships (up to a few years) - although on some vacations, when I'm single, I'll still try to... hug... as many women as I can get away it.

Despite being with many women since my late teens I have only been in a few relationships lasting more than a year, and only one of those women was someone I could actually imagine a future with. Unfortunately she didn't feel as strongly and the few years were were together were a bit rocky, including a couple of brief breakups (during which I tried getting over her by meeting as many other women as possible, and while that was often physically satisfying it certainly wasn't emotionally so).

It's only the last handful of years I've actually felt the inclination to "settle down", but obviously that's not going to happen without finding a woman I want and who wants me back - for the long term.

And "able to avoid marriage"? I'm not sure if you're meeting women in church (the closest I've ever come was meeting someone in a temple in Thailand), but no woman I've ever been with have ever overtly tried to push the question of marriage, even if there have been some vague talks about "where we're going" and what we expect from life some months into relationships.

I ask because I am in my early 30s and currently caught up in a LT Relationship (that i've discussed at length in other threads). She is now pushing me hard for marriage. My previous gf who I was also in a LT relationship with also pushed fairly hard for marriage even though at that time we were pretty young.

Many of my friends have been hit with the marriage ultimatum as well and most ended up committing and are already REGRETTING it only a few years into the marriage.

Maybe the secret is to avoid LT Relationships or tell the girl early on its not something you're interested in and leave it to her to stay or leave. Dodgy
06-14-2019 04:16 PM
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lunchmoney Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-11-2019 12:24 AM)GreenHills Wrote:  OP, 40 seems a bit early. How are your health habits and body health? At 40 you should still have desire for women.

I have to agree. I am a few years away from 40, but my friends that are in their early 40s all still chase/pursue. If anything, for some it is about quality over quantity. One recently is not searching for ONS as much as wife hunting. Either way, if you are in good physical AND mental health, you should still want to pursue women.
06-14-2019 05:25 PM
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GT777733 Offline
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
I am right at the end of my 20's.

I am not over sex - I've still got a very high sex drive.

But, I've definitely found I'm moving towards wanting an LTR for various reasons far more seriously than ever before, and I'm screening out girls hard that are 7's and below (when you consider looks, how in shape she is, intelligence, personality, conversational skills - the whole package).

Don't get me wrong - I still enjoy friendly female company, but connection is something that really does it for me at this point in my life.

This basically gets rid of 90% of the market which is a problem in itself (I can go a few days to a week or two now without even talking to a girl I'm attracted to).

The other problem I am finding in the modern dating market is that the hotter the girl (I'm talking for an LTR, not ONS or STR) - the more likelihood she has been completely and utterly spoiled rotten and mentally corrupted by the 1000's of guys after her attention and time on social media and in real life.

The last girl I was seeing very recently in my opinion was an 8.5 (big boobs, amazing conversationalist, funny, petite body, beautiful looking), had a few red flags (I was willing to address them with her and work through them), and after a few dates, I genuinely thought she was going to be a legitimate LTR (I was reminding myself to stay level headed, but it was looking pretty damn good). Then she flipped one day and went cold - I was incredibly cut up for a few days. I found out she had got pulled out for a night out with a group of her friends that knew one of the guys she was seeing recently, and they got into an argument, and it became a shit show that I just couldn't deal with anymore because she was acting up and I was losing my dignity and respect getting involved. I had to pull the pin on her and it was incredibly disappointing (it put a massive dent on my attitude towards the dating scene for a bit). It's kind of like what Roosh has said in the past - your hands are tied to a certain extent when it comes to a girl's external environment - sometimes it can take a village to keep her in check ... no matter what you offer as a guy.

I get depressed sometimes thinking if I want a relationship in the West, I'm going to have to settle for a 7 or lower, but with the amount of work I've put into myself over the last decade (not only the quantity of work, but the difficulty of it and how painful it's been at times) - I just can't bring myself to do that (it does cross my mind that older guys on this forum have said women's looks degrade quickly into their 30's and once they start popping out kids - but, I still want what I think is my fair slice of the pie)

At the moment, I try to focus on what I can control - work, friends, family, health, reading about the lives of other red pill men on the internet and how they are approaching things, personal projects etc.

But, there is that part of you that thinks that the right girl would just take your attitude and motivation to tackle life together to that next level, and obviously the option to have kids and a family is something you can't buy with any amount of money.

I'm wise enough and experienced enough now though to know that there's no perfect girl out there (they all have their problems and you as the man are always going to bring more competence and value to the relationship than her - that's just the way it is), and no woman can make you happy (you have to find that yourself). But, they can definitely complement you and balance you out.

I do remind myself that if I see or hear of a guy with a girl that sounds too good to be true - either he combined skill with luck/timing and good on him, or, I have no idea what he did to get the girl and what he's doing to keep her (how much he's sacrificed his values, how much he buys her stuff, how much he manipulates and lies to her or cheats on her etc.).

Those are my thoughts for now - I haven't given up, but I'm very very selective about how I devote my time to dating now.

It can get monotonous and boring at times, but I try to practice mindfulness and stay productive, and let the rest take care of itself.

I should probably also remind myself that I put myself in this situation and I need to get better at absolutely owning that. If you want great things in life - you have to be willing to deal with the consequences of these choices and the scenario that you might not end up with what you want.
(This post was last modified: 06-17-2019 08:12 AM by GT777733.)
06-17-2019 07:57 AM
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RE: Retiring from the game at 40?
(06-17-2019 07:57 AM)GT777733 Wrote:  I am right at the end of my 20's.

I am not over sex - I've still got a very high sex drive.

But, I've definitely found I'm moving towards wanting an LTR for various reasons far more seriously than ever before, and I'm screening out girls hard that are 7's and below (when you consider looks, how in shape she is, intelligence, personality, conversational skills - the whole package).

Don't get me wrong - I still enjoy friendly female company, but connection is something that really does it for me at this point in my life.

This basically gets rid of 90% of the market which is a problem in itself (I can go a few days to a week or two now without even talking to a girl I'm attracted to).

The other problem I am finding in the modern dating market is that the hotter the girl (I'm talking for an LTR, not ONS or STR) - the more likelihood she has been completely and utterly spoiled rotten and mentally corrupted by the 1000's of guys after her attention and time on social media and in real life.

The last girl I was seeing very recently in my opinion was an 8.5 (big boobs, amazing conversationalist, funny, petite body, beautiful looking), had a few red flags (I was willing to address them with her and work through them), and after a few dates, I genuinely thought she was going to be a legitimate LTR (I was reminding myself to stay level headed, but it was looking pretty damn good). Then she flipped one day and went cold - I was incredibly cut up for a few days. I found out she had got pulled out for a night out with a group of her friends that knew one of the guys she was seeing recently, and they got into an argument, and it became a shit show that I just couldn't deal with anymore because she was acting up and I was losing my dignity and respect getting involved. I had to pull the pin on her and it was incredibly disappointing (it put a massive dent on my attitude towards the dating scene for a bit). It's kind of like what Roosh has said in the past - your hands are tied to a certain extent when it comes to a girl's external environment - sometimes it can take a village to keep her in check ... no matter what you offer as a guy.

I get depressed sometimes thinking if I want a relationship in the West, I'm going to have to settle for a 7 or lower, but with the amount of work I've put into myself over the last decade (not only the quantity of work, but the difficulty of it and how painful it's been at times) - I just can't bring myself to do that (it does cross my mind that older guys on this forum have said women's looks degrade quickly into their 30's and once they start popping out kids - but, I still want what I think is my fair slice of the pie)

At the moment, I try to focus on what I can control - work, friends, family, health, reading about the lives of other red pill men on the internet and how they are approaching things, personal projects etc.

But, there is that part of you that thinks that the right girl would just take your attitude and motivation to tackle life together to that next level, and obviously the option to have kids and a family is something you can't buy with any amount of money.

I'm wise enough and experienced enough now though to know that there's no perfect girl out there (they all have their problems and you as the man are always going to bring more competence and value to the relationship than her - that's just the way it is), and no woman can make you happy (you have to find that yourself). But, they can definitely complement you and balance you out.

I do remind myself that if I see or hear of a guy with a girl that sounds too good to be true - either he combined skill with luck/timing and good on him, or, I have no idea what he did to get the girl and what he's doing to keep her (how much he's sacrificed his values, how much he buys her stuff, how much he manipulates and lies to her or cheats on her etc.).

Those are my thoughts for now - I haven't given up, but I'm very very selective about how I devote my time to dating now.

It can get monotonous and boring at times, but I try to practice mindfulness and stay productive, and let the rest take care of itself.

I should probably also remind myself that I put myself in this situation and I need to get better at absolutely owning that. If you want great things in life - you have to be willing to deal with the consequences of these choices and the scenario that you might not end up with what you want.

Take this piece of advice from a 37 year old man: you won´t find an adequate woman in the west.
Take advantage of the fact that you earn your money in dollars, find a way to work remotely and start visiting SE Asia, Eastern Europe and Africa to find a country with a culture that you like and where people still get married and men call the shots. Search for a wife there.
06-17-2019 08:49 AM
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