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Children and Financials
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RDF Offline
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Post: #1
Children and Financials
This is a topic that I have given a lot of thought to over the past several years, particularly recently. Certainly many other members have as well, particularly those who are planning to have multiple (2-4) children that they will raise in Western countries. I've seen this discussion pop up as an ancillary topic in multiple other threads, yet from a search I wasn't able to find a dedicated thread.

Here is the broad question that I am pondering: Is it prudent to delay having children until reaching a certain monetary benchmark (whether a specific $ in savings, or an income of $x/year)? If so, what is the appropriate number, and if not, why, and what are ways to alleviate the financial burden?

Obviously this answer will depend on each person's age, country of residence, whether your wife works or not, how many children you want to have, etc. So any detailed answer should probably clarify these details. As for myself, I'm in my late 20s, live in a large city in the US, don't necessarily want my wife to work in the future (though this is open to question... see below).

To get the discussion rolling, here are a few aspects and questions that one should consider:

--- Children are expensive. The specific number is open to debate but I've seen estimates of cost of one child ranging from $200k to $500k+, excluding college. There's a lot of items included in this, though a few of them account for a disproportionate amount of the variability.

1) Schooling - This is the biggest variable in my view. On one hand, schooling can obviously be essentially free (public school). On the other, public schools in most major cities are terrible, and private schools typically cost $10-20k/year for grades K-5 and $25k+ for grades 6-12. For 3 kids, that's $800,000 total, a borderline intolerable number. The "easy" solution is to live in a suburban neighborhood with good public schools, though that will most likely come with either a long commute or a sacrifice in income.

2) Housing - If you're planning to have several kids, you're probably going to need a much bigger place than what you have now. If your parents or her parents make you a downpayment or you've already bought/inherited a house, congratulations, you have no need to worry. If not, however, this is something that will become important. How big of a house is needed? Are you comfortable with your children sharing rooms past ~ 10y/o or so? What % of your income should go towards housing when you have a family compared to when you are single?

3) Childcare (ages 0-5) - This might actually be the most important variable, since you will have to face it almost immediately after having kid #1. Competent child care for young kids is pretty damn expensive, and is obviously necessary if both parents are working. I've heard of numbers ~$10k/year per kid. This can be largely alleviated if wife doesn't work, though at times you'll surely need a small break.

--- What financial contribution do you expect from your wife? This ties in to the early childcare discussion since it would essentially be a tradeoff between her income and spending money on having somebody take care of the kids. Personally, I have no desire for my 1-5 year-old children to spend 10 hours/day with a babysitter and would strongly prefer my future wife to take extended time off, though this obviously changes the math significantly. What are the other pros/cons here?

One other option is for her to work remotely/location independent. For example, one of my plates runs a swimsuit boutique completely online and makes ~$1k/mth, not a lot but considering it takes only a few hours of work a week, its a nice incremental number. Easier said than done of course, and there's always risk of it falling apart.

--- How much will other family members (your parents, her parents, aunts/uncles, etc) contribute? This is where Western countries truly stand out among the world. In most other places, the extended family, particularly grandparents, will actively participate in raising the child. Especially if I'm wifing a foreign girl, I'd expect this from her side, and I have a good relationship with my family. Still, you need to manage this appropriately, and I'm sure some older members can share examples of how they've handled differences with their in-laws/parents on raising their children.

--- How much time do YOU want to spend with your children? Somebody's gotta make the $ of course, and in a traditional marriage, that's you. I'm generally of the mindset that children need to spend more time with their mom than their dad. Though, I also wonder how accurate this is. Basically every girl with daddy issues usually has them stemming from this, and almost all of the upper-middle class sluts that I've met usually had dads who were constantly working/traveling and never spent time with them. Again, just something to consider.

-- At what age does the desire/need to have children with a quality woman overtake any specific financial benchmark? The ability to find a young quality female does decrease at a certain point, as does one's energy to handle kids. I personally want to have children in my mid30s and assuming my future lady at that time wants them as well, I would probably want to have them regardless of whether I've hit the financial benchmarks.

I am not married to any particular opinion, and am open to changing my mind on any of the things that I've stated above. This is a complicated subject with many moving parts, and there are plenty of things that I likely haven't even considered. I'm looking forward to reading other people's thoughts.
07-29-2019 05:13 PM
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Graft Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
delete

I built this empire and I did it by myself. Nobody did it for me. Not Ivana, not Marla. Nobody! ~Donald Trump
(This post was last modified: 07-29-2019 06:18 PM by Graft.)
07-29-2019 06:17 PM
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Graft Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
Good thread and one that I have spent many late nights thinking about. I'm your age as well, relatively good financial situation but not rich.

1) Schooling - My answer always has been this: move to a top 3 school district in your metro area with a demographic that consists of upper class whites/Asians. The schools will pay for themselves and the house will have much better resale value than a neighborhood which is slowly being invaded by illegals, Section 8, etc. If you truly move to one of these districts, private school is questionable at best and your kids might actually go to school with lower socioeconomic classes than your local public school. I've seen parents blow 300k-1M per child on boarding schools, private colleges, day schools, etc for their kids to end up with run of the mill 60k corporate jobs. The kids would have been better off with public education and the money in a trust. Private school should be for: 1) those who cheap out and live in working class/average districts, 2) those who are rich enough to take a gamble that private education will pay off 3) children with special learning styles.

2) Housing - To live in one of these districts, after many weeks of searching, I estimate that it will take bottom end $500k for a nice 4 bedroom in wealthy Texas (Southlake/Plano West) and 800k for a nice 4 bedroom in wealthy NYC area (Darien, CT/Upper Saddle River, NJ/Lloyd Harbor, NY). So $100k-200k 20% down payment depending on where I live. Hopefully in 10-15 years from the purchase of that original home, I will be able to upgrade to a 5-7 bedrom home worth double the amount of the original.

3) Childcare (ages 0-5) - If wife is American, she needs to make $70k at least. If wife is foreign, parents need to help raise the children, she should work as well. Ideal scenario with foreign wife is her parents live in the home to help with children full time.

--- How much time do YOU want to spend with your children?

I don't see my corporate career ever going over 60 hours a week at the high end.

-- Specific financial benchmark: $50,000 per child, set in a trust account at birth I'm a big proponent of giving kids a big head start in life. This sum will grow to $300-550k at 8-10% interest once the child is 25, which enables them to buy property/start a business/start a family without the fear of debt over their heads. Colleges: preferably state, but if not, scholarships/loans that will be paid with this sum if they choose (top 25-30 private college could be worth it).

I built this empire and I did it by myself. Nobody did it for me. Not Ivana, not Marla. Nobody! ~Donald Trump
(This post was last modified: 07-29-2019 06:46 PM by Graft.)
07-29-2019 06:40 PM
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king bast Offline
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Post: #4
RE: Children and Financials
Quote:Is it prudent to delay having children until reaching a certain monetary benchmark (whether a specific $ in savings, or an income of $x/year)? If so, what is the appropriate number, and if not, why, and what are ways to alleviate the financial burden?

No. These arbitrary benchmarks tend to be very upwardly flexible, with the effect that you never have enough. Say you had a benchmark of 10k in the bank. Well, you get that 10k But you still don't feel secure, so the new benchmark becomes 20k. Then when you get that 20k you decide to treat yourselves to a holiday. Now the 20k is gone and you're back at the start. Rinse and repeat a few times and your wife is now 35 and the choice has been taken from you.

Besides this, the fact is kids aren't that expensive. If you're financially stable enough to support a couple, adding a child or 2 barely moves the needle of expenses until many years into their lives.

This probably sounds crazy if you haven't got kids, but the lifestyle you're used to now will change. You won't feel the need to jet off for regular faaabulous holidays to exotic locations, you'll be happy just going camping. You won't want to spend $100s on a music festival tickets when you'll be happy just getting grandma to babysit giving you and the wife a few hours away. If you're particularly materialistic, these sacrifices might seem insurmountable, but I would just say you need to grow up. If, like most people, you've been partying since your early-mid teens, what do you think you'll be missing out on if you're not doing the same thing at 30? There's a time for that and a time to grow up and be a fucking man.

We seem to have extended adolescence these days, and avoiding progress with excuses like "I'm not financially secure" is a big part of that. Just get it done and unless you're a compete fuckup, it will turn out fine. As they say in Jurassic park "life will find a way".
07-29-2019 09:05 PM
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456 Offline
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Post: #5
RE: Children and Financials
It's not just the $XX,000 it will cost, it's the $X,XXX,000 that that would have grown into if invested instead of spent, which would then kick off $XX,000 for year for life which could be retirement if you don't have a pension (who even does anymore in private sector?).

So to me I'd be more concerned with having enough investable assets that can provide for MY (and a wife's) retirement -- and then happily be super low key and frugal raising the kids on our cashflow...

Definitely also a component of delay and extending my vanishing youth!
(This post was last modified: 07-29-2019 09:19 PM by 456.)
07-29-2019 09:17 PM
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Jaydublin Offline
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Post: #6
RE: Children and Financials
It is not nearly as expensive as you guys claim. I don't spend that much anyway. We buy mostly used things as kids grow out of everything pretty quick. I will not be paying for college or cars... maybe a loan for a cheap car if my children decide to work, which they will if they want money after 16.

Our house is basic middle class but I made sure we are in the best schools. Far more important than having the nicest home or always having enough space.

Seems like many people here think they need a hell of a lot more than they actually need based on cultural norms. ie. keeping up with the joneses bs
07-29-2019 09:28 PM
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SilentOne Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
The cold hard truth is that children are liabilities. The good things they do bring in that aren't sentimental, come on the back end. And that is if you hit the lottery like one of your children becoming a doctor or a professional athlete. Odds are against you.

They used to be more of an asset back in the old days. Having more children meant better security, working on the farm, learning the family business, taking care of you in old age, etc... Now all they do bring in is debt like childcare, medical bills, extra mouths to feed, toys to buy, clothes, school costs, freedom restrictions, and you working overtime to stay afloat. Kids now don't usually leave their mom's place to about 25 years of age, you can guess who's still paying a bulk of their bills even as an adult...you. Then there's the chance to be put on child suppport. That one... hurts... hard. In a typical family setting they are just consumers. They rarely produce anything for the good of the family. It's not really their fault but the current system we live in.

If you're just willing to dive in anyway, having about 2-3 kids would be doable. Just assume each kid is about 200k to raise and that is without future college costs. Once you get above 4 it just becomes an unnecessary headache trying to keep up with them all. I don't know what bracket you plan to live in but the poor tend to have far more children and that's for a reason.

Oh and keep the kids in public schools, no need to waste money on private schools. Just home train them as well and not rely on the public school indoctrination camp to do everything for you. Having kids as a men age between 25-40 is preferable if that's what you want. The most important thing though, is who you choose to have the kids with.
(This post was last modified: 07-30-2019 04:23 AM by SilentOne.)
07-30-2019 04:10 AM
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CDRhodes Offline
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Post: #8
RE: Children and Financials
Raising children does not need to be this expensive. A large house isn’t necessary; kids, especially same sex kids can share a room until basically adulthood. Our ancestors as late as two generations ago did this and nobody died. Toys and clothes from the thrift shop/craigslist are fine. There is no point in spending money on new clothes/toys that they will outgrow before they can wear out. As far as schooling, home school is the best option but it’s hard and not feasible for everyone. A good compromise is to find a decent public school and supplement with an hour or two of structured home learning a night. It’s a great way to get them ahead, un-doctrinate them, and spend some legit quality time with your kids.
Food is expensive, I will admit. I have three boys and they eat me out of house and home. If your area permits it, get some chickens or ducks and grow a vegetable garden. It cuts food costs (a little), provides some quality natural nutrition for the kids and gives them some responsibility and learning through animal/plant husbandry. The benefits of kids may not seem tangible at first, but when my oldest challenges me to a push up contest or jumps on a kid at the playground for messing with his brother, or lectures me on the different kinds of dinosaurs and what they eat, it’s all worth it to me.
07-31-2019 10:24 AM
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Irn Bru Protein Offline
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Post: #9
RE: Children and Financials
It doesn’t matter how much kids ‘cost’

Coming home from work and having your son or daughter run up for a hug is what it’s all about. You can’t buy that shit.

There’s a lot of guys on here who are going to die lonely and bitter.

In fact, any guy who doesn’t want kids is most likely autistic and to be fair, it’s probably better for humanity that they don’t infect the gene pool.
07-31-2019 02:00 PM
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The Black Knight Offline
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Post: #10
RE: Children and Financials
The costs associated with raising kids is relatively fixed. Shelter, food, healthcare, education. It's not rocket science nor that expensive unless you live in ultra-expensive tier 1 cities like NYC, DC, or SF.

The real financial X factor and risk is the child support system in the US and more broadly, the financial impact of a possible divorce. Every state has different rules and within those states, judges are very inconsistent in how they apply family law since every case is "different" and most states allow judges a lot of room for subjective interpretation.

In identical situations, one state could force you to pay for child support until the kid is 21, pay for college, and pay $50,000/year. Another state could make you pay until the kid is 18, not pay for college, and only pay $20,000/year.

As you can tell: when you compound the differences over potentially a decade plus, we are talking six figures differences in overall net worth. Aside from the clear cut financial impact, the incentive differences between states could affect whether your family stays together or not. Furthermore, you can't pre/post-nup away child support and women can become very mercenary once they have checked out of a relationship.

If you go the sole provider route especially, the potential financial liabilities can be massive in the event of a divorce or where even if not legally married, a woman wants to take you to cleaners on child support (particularly in certain states). If the woman works or makes more money, that can mitigate the damage but most guys here don't want a family set-up ideally where the woman works or makes more than them.

So what do you do?


1. Live in states that put caps on child support. If you make major bank, this is very significant.

2. Live in states that award joint/50-50 custody by default. A lot of women fight for primary custody to get a big pay day via child support and custody battles can get very expensive.

3. Live in states that have a strong case law in recognizing pre/post-nup agreements. It won't help with child support but you can protect to some degree other assets.

I firmly believe that if you want a higher chance of success with regards to maintaining a healthy family in the USA, you MUST absolutely avoid living in states that provide abusive financial incentives to women that go far and beyond the needs of the child (and the woman as well - lifetime alimony? Fuck that). Relationships hit low points from time to time and maintaining leverage is paramount when dealing with a highly emotional women who only need the promise of a big pay day and a nudge from a corrupt family member or friend to hit the EXPLODE button on your family.

If the financial fallout from child support was relatively tame and consistent across the board, it wouldn't be a big deal. However, the variance in impact ranges from being a nuisance to making someone suicidal. If you make 100 million and lose half your money, you'll be OK. If you make 100k and get knocked down to 50k for over a decade, that's going to have a negative life altering impact.

Example of good states to look into (they cap child support):

1. Texas
2. Nevada.

Example of states to avoid (they don't cap child support):

1. Massachusetts
2. New York.

Laws change so you have to do your research. Start with http://www.realworlddivorce.com and then actually talk to some lawyers before settling in a state.
(This post was last modified: 07-31-2019 03:46 PM by The Black Knight.)
07-31-2019 03:14 PM
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christpuncher Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
I always thought I needed excess financial security to consider having kids. I said things like "well what if my kid needs an operation and I have to drop $100k instantly?".

Now I'm 32 with a pregnant wife and over $500k in networth, and I severely regret waiting so long.

I'd say go for it as soon as you are remotely financially secure. Long as you have a reasonably OK job and a enough money for rent and groceries, go for it.
07-31-2019 04:45 PM
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Jaydublin Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
^^^ Very similar situation and I agree. Don't wait. Be mature and with a reliable woman. Nothing makes me feel better than coming home and my daughter having this giddy laugh with a huge smile.
07-31-2019 06:58 PM
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RE: Children and Financials
(07-31-2019 02:00 PM)Irn Bru Protein Wrote:  There’s a lot of guys on here who are going to die lonely and bitter.

In fact, any guy who doesn’t want kids is most likely autistic and to be fair, it’s probably better for humanity that they don’t infect the gene pool.

Shaming language at its finest. You sound like a woman who wants to coerce a man to marry her through fear saying he will die alone. I don't know about you, but I don't have this lonely gene. The truth is we all die alone anyway, unless you're in like a packed bus driving off a cliff somewhere.

Having children today doesn't even guarantee you get to raise them. Once you have a child you are at the whim of an emotional woman who's backed up by the family court. Some of these crazy women will take your child across the nation just to piss you off and paint you as a dead beat dad to everyone including the child.

You can also be put on child support even though you are already buying your child food, clothes, and gadgets. The government is just going to take the money out of your check without your approval. Even with 50-50 custody in some cases you are still subjugated to paying child support. And if you don't have any cash to pay, they will throw you in jail.

I know some of you guys want to leave a legacy, whatever that is. Let's be real here, you're already forgotten by the 3rd or 4th generation of kids. A lot of people don't even know about their grandfather's dad. Then we have over half of this nation who don't even have $3000 in a savings account. These guys saying this legacy nonsense are likely broke as a joke and leaving behind what's left from their path of destruction to their kids. These kids then grow up to be the future criminals and/or druggies.

You can't fault guys who don't want to be part of this nonsense. To have successful kids in this current system is going to cost you about 200k per child like I said before. Some do get lucky with less but that's an anomaly. Kids are consumers, not producers. You are producing nearly everything. You are free to choose whatever path you like, I'm just stating the risk analysis.
08-01-2019 12:29 AM
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Polniy_Sostav Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
If you have an average IQ or above , money is not a reason to not make kids. Just make one and enjoy the marvel. Kids do not need much money.
You can raise a kid with 100/200 Dollars a month.

Being worried about money when making a kid is not only a feminine trait , but it also shows how the West in general is scared for its own reproduction and lost in egotistic thoughts of inherited from a privileged lifestyle.
(This post was last modified: 08-01-2019 01:04 AM by Polniy_Sostav.)
08-01-2019 01:02 AM
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RE: Children and Financials
What's the purpose on an oven if not to make buns?
08-01-2019 06:42 AM
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SilentOne Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
(08-01-2019 01:02 AM)Polniy_Sostav Wrote:  If you have an average IQ or above , money is not a reason to not make kids. Just make one and enjoy the marvel. Kids do not need much money.
You can raise a kid with 100/200 Dollars a month.

Being worried about money when making a kid is not only a feminine trait , but it also shows how the West in general is scared for its own reproduction and lost in egotistic thoughts of inherited from a privileged lifestyle.

Well at least you said just have one. Everything else you said is just terrible advice. I can't believe you consider someone who's strategic and plans ahead being a feminine trait. Children cost money, there's no way around it in this current system we have set up. if you're broke, you shouldn't be having any kids.

The average American family of 4 spends about $1000 on just groceries every month. Don't believe me, look it up. So raising a kid on just $200 a month is just fantasy unless you live out in a farm somewhere away from civilization. You also got to pay someone to watch your kids, it ain't cheap. The list just goes on and on about what you got to pay for a child. You people love to talk about how things should go, but this world don't operate that way.

Also it has nothing to do about being scared to reproduce, it's just foolish to have that many kids today. It works against you unless you plan to suck the system dry living on food stamps. Please don't expect to live off that because the government can take that away with just a snap of a finger. Relying on the government to take care of you is a feminine trait. Now that I think about it, more people should be scared to have kids. These offsprings created out of recklessness are mainly the ones who have to grow up suffering.
08-01-2019 09:52 AM
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Jaydublin Offline
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Post: #17
RE: Children and Financials
Silent one, do you have kids? And if so, do you have kids in a successful marriage?
08-01-2019 10:25 AM
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SilentOne Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
No marriage for me. Not now or ever under these current marriage rules constructed today. Now for kids, not yet.
08-01-2019 10:44 AM
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Irn Bru Protein Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
I’m sorry Silent One however you really do sound like a big girl’s blouse.

Leave the baby making to the real men out there.
08-01-2019 10:52 AM
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RE: Children and Financials
(08-01-2019 10:44 AM)SilentOne Wrote:  No marriage for me. Not now or ever under these current marriage rules constructed today. Now for kids, not yet.

Then stop with the fear mongering bs. There are multiple people in this thread with families and yet you are here with the loudest voice and strongest opinion but no experience.
08-01-2019 10:58 AM
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Polniy_Sostav Offline
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RE: Children and Financials
(08-01-2019 09:52 AM)SilentOne Wrote:  
(08-01-2019 01:02 AM)Polniy_Sostav Wrote:  If you have an average IQ or above , money is not a reason to not make kids. Just make one and enjoy the marvel. Kids do not need much money.
You can raise a kid with 100/200 Dollars a month.

Being worried about money when making a kid is not only a feminine trait , but it also shows how the West in general is scared for its own reproduction and lost in egotistic thoughts of inherited from a privileged lifestyle.

Well at least you said just have one. Everything else you said is just terrible advice. I can't believe you consider someone who's strategic and plans ahead being a feminine trait. Children cost money, there's no way around it in this current system we have set up. if you're broke, you shouldn't be having any kids.

The average American family of 4 spends about $1000 on just groceries every month. Don't believe me, look it up. So raising a kid on just $200 a month is just fantasy unless you live out in a farm somewhere away from civilization. You also got to pay someone to watch your kids, it ain't cheap. The list just goes on and on about what you got to pay for a child. You people love to talk about how things should go, but this world don't operate that way.

Also it has nothing to do about being scared to reproduce, it's just foolish to have that many kids today. It works against you unless you plan to suck the system dry living on food stamps. Please don't expect to live off that because the government can take that away with just a snap of a finger. Relying on the government to take care of you is a feminine trait. Now that I think about it, more people should be scared to have kids. These offsprings created out of recklessness are mainly the ones who have to grow up suffering.

Well pardon me if I was a bit rude or not very precise .
I am talking from experience .
One kid ; until the age of two needs :
1) a good pram . You can make a good investment on this .
2) a lot of pampers ( yes that costs ; but I don't think it costs more than yourself going out or eating out all year when single ; you just have to cut that off )

3) anti irritation creams and a few expenses in water ( regular bath ; etc )

4) a baby bed with a few toys. First price is ok

5) a lot of clothes

These 5 things you can get for not too expansive. Ideally look for relatives ; friends or second hand market. Buy clothes in bulk.
The only important expanse should be pampers .

You also need medical expenses but unless the kid has a particular conditions you will not go more than 4-5 times a year.

All the rest ; should be around 100 dollars per month. This is assuming that your wife will quit working and breastfeed.

Food gets a bit expansive but your wife may instead cook it instead of buying ready baby food .

One new toy or book per month can be found very cheap here and there . Guests can bring it .

I do not see any more necessary expanse .
The biggest expanse will be to cut your freedom and give 90% of your free time to your baby and deal with your wife s mood swings .

If you have family around to babysit then you are in a luxury position . I don't have and still I manage to raise 3 kids .

Devote your life to your kids and money will not become an issue . I am sorry but cannot believe that 1000 dollars can be spent on groceries just for one more kid. I am aware that USA is more expansive than where I live now but still ... I would be curious to have a breakdown of these 1000 dollars .

Honestly ; if it s that much of a problem financially then just warn your wife and reduce your lifestyle by 3 or 4. Rent much smaller flat ; give up on your car and walk to work ; sell your valuables etc etc ..

Now it gets more expansive when they are 10 or more . But for the first 2-3 years you do not have to worry .
My view is that having a kid must be combined with a change from the inside.if you want to keep your lifestyle but compose with the baby I think it s a wrong calculation

My apologies is any previous comment was nasty .it is not a feminine trait to plan in advance . It is good . But your comment saying that people.who can't afford shouldn't have kids is not only stupid but pretty gross. On the contrary ; kids are the last source of happiness when you don't have money .

Havent you noticed that poor countries make more kids ? Do they worry more or less than you about the money ? I think much more . Do they care less about their kids ? Probably . But as I said ; if you and your wife have no IQ deficiency ; you should be fine

Do not worry about money . Make the kid and see and adapt . If you struggle ; the kid will give you this extra energy to find what is missing .

Good luck and keep us updated.

Edit : I thought silent one was the one having kid but he is not the OP )
(This post was last modified: 08-01-2019 10:59 AM by Polniy_Sostav.)
08-01-2019 10:58 AM
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SilentOne Offline
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Post: #22
RE: Children and Financials
Polniy_Sostav, no hard feelings. You seem like you got a plan, so that's a start.

Like you, I already stated that the poor have far more kids then the not so poor. Its mainly because they aren't as productive in their daily lives as the ones on the richer side of the spectrum. I don't mean it in a bad way, it's just the way the world is.
08-01-2019 11:12 AM
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CDRhodes Offline
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Post: #23
RE: Children and Financials
Family of five here. We spend about $650 on groceries per month. Admittedly, I grow a decent amount of food and always look for specials/sales and I don’t buy much processed food. We also don’t eat out often. For one it’s expensive and secondly it’s a pain in the ass when you have a lot of kids. There is no way around the fact that having a family involves some financial sacrifice, but if you’re smart about it, it doesn’t have to be an undue burden. One major sacrifice you will have to make is not having a vehicle with any semblance of cool. Government mandated child safety seats are huge. Fitting two to four of them in a vehicle requires a big vehicle. Your Jeep, Mustang, Z car, etc isn’t going to cut it any more.
08-01-2019 02:18 PM
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Sargon2112 Offline
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Post: #24
RE: Children and Financials
Unless you or your spouse is a crack head and/or are one of those folks who just can't get out of their own way, go for it. The key is picking a quality woman - which may or may not be easy, depending on where you live in the US.

Avoid debt like the plague! If you do have to take on debt, minimize it and pay it off as soon as possible. Even if your income isn't stellar, being free of debt is a game changer.

I am 43, wife is 6 years younger. We dated 6 years before getting married. Kids came after that. We have a 5yr old and a 3yr old now. The only regret is that we should have done it 10 years earlier. The extra financial stability is nice but we both agree that we should've done it sooner.

Best of luck!
08-01-2019 04:34 PM
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Dr. Howard Away
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Post: #25
RE: Children and Financials
I think Black Knights cost awareness of child support risk is the only caution worth considering, otherwise kids are inexpensive. Here are some ways to reduce costs:

1. Marry a wife that does not have a college degree, have her do homeschooling, childcare and cooking. The opportunity cost for having her not work is low, because her earning potential without a college degree is low anyway

2. Housing, this is not a cost related to children, this is a cost related to having a wife. Unless you are a cosmopolitan urbanite, when you get married your wife is going to want some sort of house with extra rooms anyway, having children makes use of those rooms instead of them being used for storage, scrapbooking and your mother in law.

3. Tax Credits - in the US you now reduce your tax burden by $2k/kid/year, if you want to reduce your income to the $30k/year range and have dependent children you can get so much free stuff like groceries, utilites, college, childcare, eitc, rent subsidies etc. that its like making $80k

A real life example of how inexpensive they are, are the Bates. Sure reality TV helps pay their bills now but they live local to me, and I know the tree care business they run and they definitely are not rich people by any means, yet they have 21? kids a stay at home mom and homeschooling. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eh_njlNFEls

Why do the heathen rage and the people imagine a vain thing? Psalm 2:1 KJV
(This post was last modified: 08-01-2019 05:47 PM by Dr. Howard.)
08-01-2019 05:40 PM
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