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A travel dilemma
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ours Offline
Male Feminist

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Joined: Aug 2019
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Post: #26
RE: A travel dilemma
My first try at writing. I haven’t taken the time to find an editor so I am sure the writing could be better. I would welcome constructive suggestions and how you liked the story. Thanks

This is your “almost” typical story of a cheating wife, an unsuspecting husband, and a decision to be made concerning the marriage. However, there are some circumstances which may not allow me to follow all the so called normal reactions and responses to the affair or affairs. (Who knows how many men or how many times before I found out?) Let me set the stage as to what has happened and ask for your help on what I should do.

My wife (Jenny) and I (William, not Bill or Will, but William) have been married a long time. Thirty years, and we lived together for four years before marriage. Both of us had been married and divorced before we met. Jenny and I raised my son from my previous marriage and now have a grandson. We are now in our golden years, I am 64 and she just turned 60. Neither of us have movie star looks; Jenny is very petite, with pixie like looks and has the cutest rear I have ever seen and a great body of a woman 20 years younger. My wife is precious to me but I am the only person who thinks she is the most beautiful women in the world. It’s because I love and cherish her so much. I’m sure she feels the same way about me. It is evident in the way we care for and treat each other. We are best friends and confidants.

So what is the problem, you might ask.
09-10-2019 05:00 PM
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Vladimir Poontang Offline
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Posts: 1,547
Joined: Feb 2017
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Post: #27
RE: A travel dilemma
(09-10-2019 02:35 PM)JimBobsCooters Wrote:  
(09-08-2019 03:33 AM)Vladimir Poontang Wrote:  No offense but I'm not going to say which country I live in or which country I was born in.

None of that is relevant. The issue here is that I see a future dilemma :

I live in country A
I might go and live in country B
But I know country B is ultimately not for me, although it's very nice
One day I may have the option to live in country C
But by then I will be used to living in country B, and that's my dilemma

All I'll say is that I live in a large city, and the other place (country B) is a medium sized touristy town. But I really don't see how that matters as this is about a future dilemma, not my current or possibly near future environment. This is not a simple question of should I go and live here, this is about how I will feel at some point in the future, when faced with a choice to make.

Is B better than A now?

Honestly, that's all that matters right now.

C is completely irrelevant to your decision now unless it is an option NOW.

If B is better than A, you're better living in B than A until you can go to C. That decision will be just as easy when it comes time to go from B to C.

Well yes, B is definitely better than where I am (A). In every aspect. How's this for a list of improvements to my life :

* Perfect weather
* Excellent air quality
* Practically no pollution
* Long daylight hours
* Lower cost of living
* The fact that it's a touristy place would mean that the atmosphere would be more leisurely than where I am
* It's a very nice town, very beautiful, and interesting things to see everywhere
* Mountain views and 3 beaches, plus even more beaches very close by
* Very close to nature, lots of mountains everywhere
* Lots of things to see and do
* Lots of things open late night
* Low crime
* Almost certainly more friendly and sociable than where I am now, because of all the tourists and expats
* I'd own 2 properties, no rent to pay (although I wouldn't have to pay rent if I stayed), and possibly (budget permitting) a 3rd property and therefore rental income
* Lots of bars, restaurants and hotels to work in (so I can at least have a bit of money to live on until my online empire comes to pass)
* The nice conditions and expat (although technically I'd be a repat) lifestyle would hopefully inspire me to succeed online. Lord knows I've tried negative motivation by being where I am
* I might meet expats who happen to be entrepreneurs, so I might learn a thing or two
* Because of the nice lifestyle I'd get out a lot more
* I'd hopefully become less of an overthinker/fussy and just enjoy day to day life
* I'd be away from western PC bullshit
* For years I've often felt the need to nap during the day. I've always had the feeling it's to do with boredom and disillusionment. Hopefully this will stop due to the better lifestyle and energizing climate

There's no doubt that going there would make my life much better. There would be some challenges though, like having to speak my language every single day, and the thought of people there seeing me as not like them because I've been away most of my life, both of which I'm self conscious about. Also I'm just generally shit scared, I have to say. But those aren't reasons not to go so if going is the best thing to do, I'll have to deal with it.

The only loss I can think of is familiarity. But again that's no reason to go, besides, leaving this country was the plan anyway.

And there's nothing keeping me here. No wife, kids, career, obligations, commitments, nothing. I'm free as a bird. Of course I have friends who I wouldn't be able to see, but that's no reason not to go.

The pros far outweigh the cons. But that's not my dilemma. I'm thinking long term.

If I just stay where I am, carry on trying to do my thing online, and hopefully succeed, I can then just take off and travel around and eventually pick a place. It would be an easy decision to pick country C over A.

But if I go, I know that I'm going to get so emotional about being in the place where I lived so long ago and was dragged away from, and it's such a nice place that I'm going to love it so much, that a part of me is going to want to stay, even though I really don't believe it's where I should spend the rest of my life. So once I find country C, that's when I'll be faced with a dilemma.

I can't describe how touched/moved/blessed/undeserving I feel at having such a unique opportunity. A loser like me being given this option, it doesn't seem right. I haven't worked for any of this. If I went, I wouldn't know what to do with all the gratitude, it's such a guilty weight to carry. It's like being bombarded with fish instead of being given a net.

That's not how we do things in Russia, comrade.

(This post was last modified: 09-10-2019 06:19 PM by Vladimir Poontang.)
09-10-2019 06:09 PM
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