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How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
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No More Mr. Soy Boy Offline
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Post: #1
How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
I've met a cool woman that is conservative, sweet, can cook and loyal and enriches my life and so on. She's such a sweet and amazing person in a way (and we've slept on two occasions).

I had a serious problem with my eyes a few weeks ago and needed a laser surgery to not go blind while she was on a trip abroad and she cancelled it to fly out and stayed to take care of me and help me with stuff, no questions asked. So that was huge for me and she was wonderful.

We've shared a lot of deep stuff with each other and made bonded a lot and I've helped her too to try and move on from stuff that happened during her childhood (abuse and stuff).

I've tried multiple times to make it clear that it won't happen but unfortunately that hasn't stopped her to constantly try and makes no secret she wants a relationship and all.

But I'm simply not as physically attracted to her as I am to others.

I still want to keep her in my life though since I know there aren't many people I could trust to have my back. So how do I get her to accept the friendzone?

I haven't been with anyone else yet either but soon I will have to tell her that.
(This post was last modified: 09-11-2019 06:11 PM by No More Mr. Soy Boy.)
09-11-2019 06:08 PM
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RDF Offline
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Post: #2
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
First, why are you not attracted to her physically? Is she objectively unattractive, or just "not your type"? Is it something that is controllable (ie: she's fat) or something that is uncontrollable? On the surface she seems like a great catch, so its important to think this through before you end it with this girl.

Assuming that you 100% want to end it and have no desire to ever be with her, I'll put it bluntly: When a girl catches strong feels for you, there isn't a way to end it without upsetting her. The only way that you can keep her in the friendzone is to [intentionally or unintentionally] dangle the carrot that one day she may become your girl. Otherwise, it'll be too much for her.

The other alternative is just waiting it out that at some point she will find another dude and fall for him. If what you say is true and she is truly a conservative girl, you might be waiting for a long time.
09-11-2019 06:26 PM
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SlickyBoy Offline
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Post: #3
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
Assuming she isn't objectively unattractive, how old is she? If she's near the end of her SMV, take stock and figure out whether you're really her first choice. Could be she's running out of options and realizes it.

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09-11-2019 07:37 PM
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ThriceLazarus Offline
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Post: #4
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
I bet if you laid on the beta real thick she’d get sick of you. Especially if you develop strong feelings for her along the way.

She’s already given up the goods in an attempt to lock you down, she’s not as conservative as you think.
09-11-2019 10:32 PM
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kinjutsu Offline
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Post: #5
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
I'm also interested in know why you find her unattractive.
If it's a weight size then encourage her to lose weight and become more active.
If it's some facial feature then suggest plastic surgery or skin treatments.
Age and situation in life is also something you should know more deeply.

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09-12-2019 12:17 AM
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Leonard D Neubache Offline
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Post: #6
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
If she's infatuated with you then you shouldn't be spending time with her at all, no matter how nice her beta orbiter presence makes you feel.

We rightly condemn women for that kind of behaviour.

God demands of Man responsibility. God demands of Woman vulnerability. These are their curse and blessing alike. Libertianism is to Man as Feminism is to Woman.
(This post was last modified: 09-12-2019 12:57 AM by Leonard D Neubache.)
09-12-2019 12:57 AM
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MichaelWitcoff Offline
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Post: #7
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
You probably won't. Just wish her well and move on, because spending lots of time with her is only going to make it worse no matter how verbally clear you make it that you aren't interested in that kind of thing.

Return Of Kings contributor and best-selling author of "On The Masons And Their Lies."
09-12-2019 02:09 AM
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Polniy_Sostav Offline
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Post: #8
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
(09-12-2019 12:17 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:  I'm also interested in know why you find her unattractive.
If it's a weight size then encourage her to lose weight and become more active.
If it's some facial feature then suggest plastic surgery or skin treatments.
Age and situation in life is also something you should know more deeply.

Sorry kinjutsu but you cannot seriously recommend a woman plastic surgery unless she had a big accident . A woman must accept the way she looks ; and so should a man .
09-12-2019 06:35 AM
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Polniy_Sostav Offline
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Post: #9
RE: How do I get her to accept that we wont be together?
(09-11-2019 06:08 PM)No More Mr. Soy Boy Wrote:  I've met a cool woman that is conservative, sweet, can cook and loyal and enriches my life and so on. She's such a sweet and amazing person in a way (and we've slept on two occasions).

I had a serious problem with my eyes a few weeks ago and needed a laser surgery to not go blind while she was on a trip abroad and she cancelled it to fly out and stayed to take care of me and help me with stuff, no questions asked. So that was huge for me and she was wonderful.

We've shared a lot of deep stuff with each other and made bonded a lot and I've helped her too to try and move on from stuff that happened during her childhood (abuse and stuff).

I've tried multiple times to make it clear that it won't happen but unfortunately that hasn't stopped her to constantly try and makes no secret she wants a relationship and all.

But I'm simply not as physically attracted to her as I am to others.

I still want to keep her in my life though since I know there aren't many people I could trust to have my back. So how do I get her to accept the friendzone?

I haven't been with anyone else yet either but soon I will have to tell her that.

In my opinion you should keep this girl and even marry her. With time ; you will find her beautiful .
You are mistaken to compare her and "others".
You might find her unattractive but a lot of things you are saying about her are clear signs that you have a special connection with her .
It would be stupid to reject this deep and profound connection just because she isn't a queen of beauty ( which is yet to be confirmed as you haven't had time to comment ).

Even if you marry a hot girl ; she will not look so.hot after some months and you will get used to her body .
But what will keep you going is the relation you have with this lady .
09-12-2019 06:39 AM
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