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The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
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eradicator Offline
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Post: #51
RE: The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
(12-05-2019 02:43 PM)NoMoreTO Wrote:  
(12-05-2019 12:21 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  I stated it earlier, albeit differently, in this thread.

There is one common characteristic that ALL "winners" have that differentiates them from "losers".

Winners choose to live desire driven lives.

Losers choose to let fear guide them.

Its immutable and its obvious who is who

Trying to relate this quote back to the guy who says marrying a woman based on her non beauty related merit is a solid plan.

I don't see this as going against your rule, just that he might have a desire to 'have lots of kids' , 'have an obedient wife who stays at home', 'young'... there is more to life than attractiveness.

Fine to say someone is weak for suggesting he marry a 4/10, but he might be a 5/10 himself and have different desires. He is obviously not afraid to say he would rather have an unattractive woman with other qualities than an attractive bimbo. Some guys will never get that.

Well of course there is more to life than attractiveness. You want your woman to be nice and not bitchy. And by the way, if a woman eats well, exercises and doesn't tan, she can stay hot for decades. You want to be attracted to the woman you are dating/marrying, to suggest otherwise is nuts.

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12-06-2019 04:04 AM
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Sensei Creation Offline
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Post: #52
RE: The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
(12-06-2019 01:44 AM)vuko225 Wrote:  a. I did not say you are lying about anything. I just said that if after all this years this is your message then I just fully disagree with the message you are spreading.

b. No I am not a troll and in fact, I would be embarrased if it took me 20 approaches to land a 7. I stopped day gaming for the most part a long time ago but vast majority of the guys I know ( including myself) could easily score with way less approaches.

I'll stick to my view. I don't even know anyone who would run around and do 100 approaches to get 1 quality girl. Awful mindset.

Vuko...

You keep digging yourself into a hole. The more you respond the more you are revealing.

You keep expressing feigned shock that it would take a man 100 cold approaches to land a 7+

That says a lot. I'm actually starting to believe that you may not have any gaming experience at all.

Most guys that joined back in the day completed the 100 approach challenge. Most of them did not land a 7+ within their first 100 approaches.

We used to have little things called approach journals here. Go back and look at them.

I myself had to do more than 300 approaches before I landed a 7. I was a complete beginner and had to learn my own style from stratch. I didn't even start developing my own gaming style until I was about 150 approaches in.

Even now, after almost 6 years of gaming experience . I would say on average my approach/"fooling around" ratio is probably 1 in 40.

This is for obvious reasons, if you had any gaming experience at all (which at this point , I'm pretty sure you don't ) , you would know that 70% of 7+ women you approach are unavailable. Before you even spit your opener there is a 70% chance she is going to reject you. Even if she likes you. She is in a relationship or she is happy with her current arrangement or she just got done arguing with her parents or whatever..

This is a game of timing and statistical averages.

An average ratio of 1 in 20 with 7+ women is way above average. And apparently even 1 in 20 would be "embarassing" to you... Lol. This is beyond laughable.

Remember your not even claiming a temporary statistical anomaly like a hot streak. You are claiming a straight long term average of less than 1 in 20. And are shocked that this isn't the norm...

In my 6 years I have met and gamed with only 1 guy who had a cold approach ratio anywhere close to 1 in 20 with 7+ women. He was not an average guy... At all.

Yes the message I am spreading is every man should go out and do at least 100 approaches before having a valid opinion on game.

If you think that is an awful mindset then you probably don't have any experience in this game and this isn't the place for you.

I won't respond any further as you clearly have no experience, no one can vouch for your outrageous claims and I'd like the thread to stay on course.
(This post was last modified: 12-06-2019 05:57 AM by Sensei Creation.)
12-06-2019 05:49 AM
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vuko225 Offline
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Post: #53
RE: The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
(12-06-2019 05:49 AM)Sensei Creation Wrote:  
(12-06-2019 01:44 AM)vuko225 Wrote:  a. I did not say you are lying about anything. I just said that if after all this years this is your message then I just fully disagree with the message you are spreading.

b. No I am not a troll and in fact, I would be embarrased if it took me 20 approaches to land a 7. I stopped day gaming for the most part a long time ago but vast majority of the guys I know ( including myself) could easily score with way less approaches.

I'll stick to my view. I don't even know anyone who would run around and do 100 approaches to get 1 quality girl. Awful mindset.

Vuko...

You keep digging yourself into a hole. The more you respond the more you are revealing.

You keep expressing feigned shock that it would take a man 100 cold approaches to land a 7+

That says a lot. I'm actually starting to believe that you may not have any gaming experience at all.

Most guys that joined back in the day completed the 100 approach challenge. Most of them did not land a 7+ within their first 100 approaches.

We used to have little things called approach journals here. Go back and look at them.

I myself had to do more than 300 approaches before I landed a 7. I was a complete beginner and had to learn my own style from stratch. I didn't even start developing my own gaming style until I was about 150 approaches in.

Even now, after almost 6 years of gaming experience . I would say on average my approach/"fooling around" ratio is probably 1 in 40.

This is for obvious reasons, if you had any gaming experience at all (which at this point , I'm pretty sure you don't ) , you would know that 70% of 7+ women you approach are unavailable. Before you even spit your opener there is a 70% chance she is going to reject you. Even if she likes you. She is in a relationship or she is happy with her current arrangement or she just got done arguing with her parents or whatever..

This is a game of timing and statistical averages.

An average ratio of 1 in 20 with 7+ women is way above average. And apparently even 1 in 20 would be "embarassing" to you... Lol. This is beyond laughable.

Remember your not even claiming a temporary statistical anomaly like a hot streak. You are claiming a straight long term average of less than 1 in 20. And are shocked that this isn't the norm...

In my 6 years I have met and gamed with only 1 guy who had a cold approach ratio anywhere close to 1 in 20 with 7+ women. He was not an average guy... At all.

Yes the message I am spreading is every man should go out and do at least 100 approaches before having a valid opinion on game.

If you think that is an awful mindset then you probably don't have any experience in this game and this isn't the place for you.

I won't respond any further as you clearly have no experience, no one can vouch for your outrageous claims and I'd like the thread to stay on course.

Bunch of nonsense and loser mentality.

I did not express shock that one would do 100 approaches ( I never counted my approaches ( idiotic) but I deff cleared that marked long ago if you count years. I express shock that after years of gaming and acting like an arrogant expert you still claim that it takes 100 approaches to get a 7. It takes me max 2-3 approaches to get a 7 anywhere I lived. NYC, Ukraine, Poland , Milan, wont even mention SEA etc.

Again, you might be very low value or just low standards but I tend to talk and met with many guys from this forum who are in another league than the crap you spit. You acting shocked that one can even get 8-10s on regular basis makes zero sense.
(This post was last modified: 12-06-2019 11:03 AM by vuko225.)
12-06-2019 11:02 AM
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NoMoreTO Offline
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Post: #54
RE: The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
(12-06-2019 04:04 AM)eradicator Wrote:  
(12-05-2019 02:43 PM)NoMoreTO Wrote:  
(12-05-2019 12:21 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  I stated it earlier, albeit differently, in this thread.

There is one common characteristic that ALL "winners" have that differentiates them from "losers".

Winners choose to live desire driven lives.

Losers choose to let fear guide them.

Its immutable and its obvious who is who

Trying to relate this quote back to the guy who says marrying a woman based on her non beauty related merit is a solid plan.

I don't see this as going against your rule, just that he might have a desire to 'have lots of kids' , 'have an obedient wife who stays at home', 'young'... there is more to life than attractiveness.

Fine to say someone is weak for suggesting he marry a 4/10, but he might be a 5/10 himself and have different desires. He is obviously not afraid to say he would rather have an unattractive woman with other qualities than an attractive bimbo. Some guys will never get that.

Well of course there is more to life than attractiveness. You want your woman to be nice and not bitchy. And by the way, if a woman eats well, exercises and doesn't tan, she can stay hot for decades. You want to be attracted to the woman you are dating/marrying, to suggest otherwise is nuts.

I just struggle with this abundance mentality stuff.

Yes, we need vision. You can't have something you can't imagine.

But a Mans gotta know his limitations.

While there's lots of guys on the present forum setting low marks for themselves, there are a lot of guys on the past forum dreaming of the Land of Milk & Honey when they have a decent, fertile, woman in front of them.

“Where the danger is, so grows the saving element.” ~ German poet Hoelderlin
12-06-2019 12:44 PM
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eradicator Offline
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Post: #55
RE: The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
(12-06-2019 05:49 AM)Sensei Creation Wrote:  
(12-06-2019 01:44 AM)vuko225 Wrote:  a. I did not say you are lying about anything. I just said that if after all this years this is your message then I just fully disagree with the message you are spreading.

b. No I am not a troll and in fact, I would be embarrased if it took me 20 approaches to land a 7. I stopped day gaming for the most part a long time ago but vast majority of the guys I know ( including myself) could easily score with way less approaches.

I'll stick to my view. I don't even know anyone who would run around and do 100 approaches to get 1 quality girl. Awful mindset.

Vuko...

You keep digging yourself into a hole. The more you respond the more you are revealing.

You keep expressing feigned shock that it would take a man 100 cold approaches to land a 7+

I don't get it, it isn't like 100 approaches is a lot, 10,000 or 50000 would be a lot.

My biggest problem with this whole argument is this: you will spit a lot better game, and be a lot more interested in the girl if you are genuinely attracted to her. I don't talk to overweight women ever, they are invisible to me and I don't like them.

I talk to thin women all the time. Get it in your head that is normal

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12-07-2019 01:36 AM
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vuko225 Offline
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Post: #56
RE: The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
(12-07-2019 01:36 AM)eradicator Wrote:  
(12-06-2019 05:49 AM)Sensei Creation Wrote:  
(12-06-2019 01:44 AM)vuko225 Wrote:  a. I did not say you are lying about anything. I just said that if after all this years this is your message then I just fully disagree with the message you are spreading.

b. No I am not a troll and in fact, I would be embarrased if it took me 20 approaches to land a 7. I stopped day gaming for the most part a long time ago but vast majority of the guys I know ( including myself) could easily score with way less approaches.

I'll stick to my view. I don't even know anyone who would run around and do 100 approaches to get 1 quality girl. Awful mindset.

Vuko...

You keep digging yourself into a hole. The more you respond the more you are revealing.

You keep expressing feigned shock that it would take a man 100 cold approaches to land a 7+

I don't get it, it isn't like 100 approaches is a lot, 10,000 or 50000 would be a lot.

My biggest problem with this whole argument is this: you will spit a lot better game, and be a lot more interested in the girl if you are genuinely attracted to her. I don't talk to overweight women ever, they are invisible to me and I don't like them.

I talk to thin women all the time. Get it in your head that is normal


My argument here has absolutely nothing to do with 100 or 1000 approaches ( if we measure it over weeks/months/years) - whatever. I personally CBA to approach a lot now and don't see the need but in the earlier days I did. None of my business if others still run around and approach ton of women past 30, that makes sense especially if you score 1 for 100 on average )

My entire point is that the ratio of 1% success rate is absurd and laughable to me.
(This post was last modified: 12-07-2019 08:09 AM by vuko225.)
12-07-2019 08:07 AM
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Cadders Offline
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Post: #57
RE: The Keys to a Healthy Relationship
Everything is a compromise.

The women I married is probably a 5. I'm a 7 on a good day (I'm not hideous but I am short - it is what it is). We got together 30 years ago.Waaaay before I discovered game.

Going in I knew I could pull better looking women, because, well, I had. I knew she wouldn't age particularly well and I knew she had baggage. But I knew she was 'the one'. How? Because very quickly, she signalled by her behaviour that she wanted to submit to my frame, to be part of my plan, to follow my lead. Of course, in those days I didn't see it in these terms, but I now understand that was what was going on. I also instinctively sensed that I would need to put in less effort with her than with a better looking women. Now, we can debate if this is truly the case - that I could perhaps have found a 7 who would have been as low maintenance as the women I decided to marry - but I wasn't prepared to put the time and effort in to find out; I wanted to get on with my life - build a family - and not faff about trying to find 'better' when I had a decent women who was good to go right now.

Everything is a compromise.

The key thing is, I never made my wife my life either before or after our marriage. Getting caught up in 'settling' for a 5 when you could (maybe) have a 7 with a bit more work, ignores the opportunity cost that results in trying to find one. The cost of wasting time and effort that you could be spending on your mission.

And once you are engaged on your mission, not having to spend excessive effort gaming your wife, also helps. Of course, anyone who has read some of my previous posts will know that I went too far and focused on my mission at the expensive of gaming my wife and paid the consequences - loss of attraction and consequent reduction of sex - but at no point did she ever threaten to or give any indication that she would want to leave me. Even when I was busy shooting myself I the foot relationship-wise, she was at my side even though she was not happy. And some of that, I'm sure, is that as poorly as I was engaged in our marriage, she sensed I was still a better bet than her other options. That, I think, is the value a man obtains from marrying down a couple of points. It buys you some slack, some time to get things back on track. It's not a free ride though - it's still on you as the man to right the ship when things get fucked up.

And now.....we're on the other side of all that.

Into our 50s. Two aging bodies, two collections of joints and valves that are starting to fail, and two happy, healthy, over-achieving kids making their own way in the world. One shared set of memories, one home, a life, so far, well lived.

Mission accomplished. Well, I don't think you ever finish the mission of being a father, but for the purposes of this discussion, mission accomplished.

My point in all this naval gazing is simply this - don't make your women your life. Physically women are ALWAYS a depreciating asset. Outside of the complete ham-beasts and the chronically ugly, sex with just about any women all feels the same. And if you're worried about being seen to commit to a plain women you are always going to fail at life because how you present to others clearly means more to you than your mission.

Neither women nor men get to have it all.

Everything is a compromise.

Don't make the perfect the enemy of the good. Doing so ensures you will end up with neither.
Yesterday 06:46 AM
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