“Rise from Your Grave” - A General Fitness Journal

[ThriceLazarus]

“Announcing your plans is a good way to hear god laugh.”

Lost the whole month of July. For the last year I’ve been living with and taking care of my Grandmother. One week and she was gone. A two day scare, she refused to go to the hospital, her health rallied, and then... Found her one morning, collapsed, nearly missed her before heading to training. The next day she passed.

It’s quiet, this house. Had no drive to do anything. Barely could work. Spent about 12 hours a day alternating between lectures on death and life and letting go or watching Let’s Plays of people playing video games from my childhood. Oh, and ruminating. Brooding, on the handful of times I was a right cunt - I had my excuses, but they rang hollow.

Dropped from training about 20 hours a week to 2.

However, I’m weighing in at 211 pounds. When my Grandfather died I put on about 20 pounds. When my fiancée threw me away I ballooned up about 40. So, timidly, with trepidation, I can say that I’m no longer an emotional eater.

Silver linings.

These last few days I’ve been getting back into it. Feels good, man. All we can do is get back up.

No claims, no plans, no deadlines. I’ll check in in about a month or so.

 

[sparta575]

That's a lot to deal with emotionally - so while a collapse would have been understandable. The fact that it was not worse speaks well of it. Grieve fro your loved one but realize that your life goes on.

 

[Checkmat]

Sorry to hear of your loss.

Even though you are grieving, do what you can. Even if it's just a walk, jog or some push ups. Don't neglect yourself.

Best wishes.

 

[ThriceLazarus]

@Sparta/Checkmat

Thank, you gentlemen. It meant something to read that, weeks ago.

August was slow to start rolling, yet it did. It presents a pattern, that I am capabable of 8-10 months of exponential effort followed by a considerable crash. A hibernation. Fitting, for a bear of a man.

I burned through a quarter pound of bud in 7 weeks. Usually, that would take me a year. So the sweet leaf is out for now, replaced with CBD tinctures/hemp flower. The rocketing of mood and motivation since September’s start has cemented that last dance with Mary Jane.

It’s sort of a shame, because jiujitsu-ka’s seemingly smoke like chimneys. S’all good - vicariously I live while the whole world dies. An aside, Tool’s new album wasn’t bad.

Work has been heavy, training has been rolling along, rolling over. Adding BJJ is perfect, the Kung Fu I cultivate is a complete system aside from the total lack of ground-game. Complementary.

Let’s do the math, Man.

~11 hours of Kung Fu
~6 hours of Brazilian Jiujitsu
~2 hours of Qi Gong
~5 hours of calisthenics/mobility/meditation

24 hours a week. Now I pay for my sins - while He rests a day, I must work.

There’s something there, something to the forms, the functions, the postures. Everyone I roll with complains that I’m too strong.

I can’t help but laugh. My 1RM bench press has topped out at 185, squat and deadlift shy of 300, pitiful for a grown ass 100kg human male.

That’s the Kung Fu secret, I guess. It’s all in the hips.

Speaking of 100kg - after starting Jiujitsu I swelled up to 240 for a few weeks. This is a natural cycle, necessary for adaptation, and I have watered enough Wisdom to welcome it now rather than fret about a number on the scale like a woman. Hovered at 225 for a while, now bodyfat is slowly being stripped away. Cravings are shifting. It feels different this time, which is good. Only time will tell - realz over feelz.

Good luck in all your endeavors, Brothers.

 

[ThriceLazarus]

Things are rolling. Making it to every training session possible, though I’ve been slacking on my bodyweight training. I’ve been so damn busy with such a wild schedule that I just forget to do the exercises. I need to carve out 20 minutes at the same time everyday to get this done.

Hanging right around 220 - however, I’m nearly at the same belt loop I was using the few times I’ve teetered around 200. Body recomposition, baby!

The most incredible change these last few weeks has been a dramatic shift in energy levels and my sleeping patterns. I’ve always been the kind of person who’s needed 8+ hours of sleep, coupled with an hour or two to actually wake up. Nowadays I can’t sleep for more than 5 - and when I wake up I’m actually awake. I have found that I’ll need a nice 30-60 minute nap in the mid-day, though I don’t mind this new polyphasic sleep schedule. Most importantly, I’m using these early morning hours - instead of burning them away on youtube or whatever, I’m starting every day with at least an hour of training.

I’ll update when there’s any dramatic changes.