This passage reminds me of an interaction I had a few days ago with someone:
“If we expose someone out of love, with pain in our hearts, then a change will occur in his heart whether he understands us or not. But to expose without love, with partiality, only enrages to object of our exposure. Our hostility strikes against his egoism, producing sparks like flint against steel.
If we tolerate our brother out of love, he will feel it. But he also feels our hostility, even if we keep it inside and don’t express it. Our hostility arouses alarm in him. We must always ask ourselves: “Why do I want to say what I’m about to say? What is motivating me? Do I really care about my neighbor or do I just want to show him how wonderful I am, to show off a bit?” If someone tries to solve ecclesiastical problems allegedly out of faith, but really thinking of his own advantage, then how can such a person win God’s blessing?”
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The person was a young man who said he was a preacher’s son, grew up in the church, but rejected it because he had hostile interactions with clergy while he was young.
Christians have always had a delicate balance to strike in order to bring more into the church; we do not use a sword to conquer because we know the Word will speak for itself, but we are its worldly representatives.
The young man sounded like he still yearns for a place in the church, and I simply listened and conversed. Perhaps he will return.