3 Spiritual Types Of Women

Roosh

Cardinal
Originally posted on RooshV.com

girl-slavic-trad-1024x683.jpg

The hardest thing for a Christian man to do is choose his wife. Unless God gives him a direct revelation of who to marry, he is on his own when it comes to making a decision that will assuredly involve hesitation and doubt. While I can’t begin to offer guidance on whether you should give a yes or no to a certain woman, I can share knowledge on three broad types of women and how seriously you should consider them for marriage.

1. Traditional women​




A woman who is born in an explicitly traditional family has been given God- or pagan-centered morals since birth, even if those morals weren’t taught to her as coming from God the Father. She has a healthier conscience and is therefore more resistant to falling into sin, and when she does fall, she does not stumble badly. She may have a failed relationship or two under her belt, and perhaps an experimental one-night stand, but no drug addictions, tattoos, double-digit notch counts, or abortions.

With her traditional upbringing, she never saw the need to repent and be born again because she was never fully oriented towards sin. If she slips, a period of confession and prayer may be all she needs to get back on track. She will not appear particularly religious because she is mostly living by morals instilled in her since childhood.

Because the Christian faith in the United States has become so badly corrupted, I would not classify women raised in Christian households as traditional unless it is clear that her family home is an extension of the church, void of worldly entertainments and influences, with a father that acts as a firm patriarch. Most traditional women you encounter will have immigrant parents, usually Muslim. Young Armenian women, for example, don’t have much of a church or prayer life, but they were raised with enough morals centered around family that they are closer to God than nominally Christian American women.

The marriage potential of women from traditional families is quite good, but beware that they may not want to learn new ways of worship and their faith may not deepen, so what you see is what you get. It is also the case that if you marry a traditional woman, you are marrying the family. If her family is pleasant then this will be an asset when raising children.

2. Pre-repentant women​




If a woman wasn’t born in a traditional God-fearing family, she will likely be far from God. Starting at a young age, she became addicted to the pleasures of this world and will attempt daily to re-create paradise on earth to be “happy” instead of preparing for the Paradise of the next life. Any faith she does possess will be New Age in nature, centered around yoga and “oneness” with the universe.

Even though a woman like this may not be necessarily evil, she is serving the will of Satan by not directly worshipping her Creator or following her God-given conscience. A close examination of her past will reveal innumerable sins that have not been sacramentally confessed, and when it comes to men, she will try to find one who makes her feel good through temporal emotions and material benefits instead of one who can help assure the salvation of her soul.

A pre-repentant woman is especially dangerous because since puberty she learned to maximize her sexuality to lure a man of status. In effect, she’s a hypnotist of men who match her degraded spiritual state. She will badly deceive many men into thinking she’s a good life partner when in actuality she is merely a good sex partner. (Nearly all of the women I had relations with prior to coming to Lord Jesus Christ were in this category.)

We are taught by Saint Paul not to get yoked with non-Christians, so I would not consider marrying a pre-repentant woman. There is absolutely no guarantee she will ever take up the faith and unless she has the rarity of a soft heart, chances are she will continue to fall and take you down with her. If I meet a woman in this category, I would gently share the Gospel with her or give her the Jordanville prayer book to get her on the right track.

3. Post-repentant women​




When a woman is truly repentant, she re-orients her mind and body away from sin. Within a short amount of time, her entire life changes, from her beliefs to her behavior. Repentance is so transformative that her face may even begin to look different. No longer does she dress immodestly, attack men with feminist talking points, or fornicate. It will be obvious when a woman repents because she is no longer who she used to be.

A repentant woman is likely to have a heavy suitcase of past sins that the man she marries will have to forgive and accept. While a woman who has multiple tattoos and has slept with 25 or more men is justified by God upon repentance, not every man will be able to stomach her past. Allow the man who can accept her past to marry her, and if that man isn’t you then let her go so that she may continue her search for a husband. If God intends her to marry then she will marry.

It is critical for you to discern true repentance from a woman who is simply trying a new dating strategy. Some women, when they get older, realize that they cannot hook a man through sexuality, so they put on a veneer of false modesty and grace without any internal change to the soul. Other women, in a rush to beat their biological clock, will simply lower their standards and temporarily pretend to be more pleasant than they really are.

True repentance involves a full turning away from the old self. When a repentant woman discusses her past, you should sense a mournful attitude of how she used to live, followed soon by a clear and unambiguous declaration of Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior. You must be able to discern a woman who is attempting to please God and one who is simply trying a new tactic to receive a worldly benefit, and the only way you can properly do that is if your own faith is genuine and strong.

If you can accept the past of a post-repentant woman, her suitability for marriage is high since she has made a decision of her free will to pursue Lord Jesus Christ. In some respects, her potential may be higher than the traditional woman since she has already danced with the devil and therefore will be more inclined to say no to temptation in the future.

Conclusion

I am a post-repentant man. Even though my parents were immigrants of traditional backgrounds, they raised me in a purely secular manner. My adult life up to middle age was completely wasted on sin and excesses of the flesh. If you’ve been following me for some time then you have witnessed that repentance is total and all-encompassing. The harder someone has fallen, the more manifest their repentance will be, and I am no exception.

Once you understand the three spiritual states of women, you can make better decisions about whether to pursue a courtship or not (if you’re a woman looking for a husband, these states also apply to men). If a woman is pre-repentant, give her a sermon and the name of a suitable Orthodox Church. Ignore how her beauty or personality make you feel, because I don’t need to tell you the consequences of choosing the wrong woman for marriage. Otherwise, proceed with God’s help. Approach your wife selection with spiritual eyes to make the decision that God knows is best for you.

Read Next: Only God Can Find You A Good Wife
Permalink
 

J.E.

Robin
A good article Roosh. The first type of woman is the best in my opinion. They may not be religious but they understand God's order and relationship between men and women on a fundamental level, something you cannot teach a post university Western girl. They can learn it in an intellectual manner, but it will take ages before they internalize the perspective and the respective virtues necessary to change (if they even bother).

Why didn't you include a fourth category, like the "pious girl" or something similar? I visited churches in which the girls were raised very godly and never strayed from the just path. There is a meekness, quietness, and gentleness in their soul you feel purifed by just being in their presence, and they are genuinely interested about Christianity in general and the doctrines of their denomination in particular. What I mean you can talk with them about some men's topics and it is invigorating for them and not boring. They have the mind of a man but the heart of a woman. As Dr Van Helsing said in Dracula, these are truly the best creatures among women.
 

big poppa

Kingfisher
Gold Member
I am engaged to a ‘post repentant’ woman.. I never thought I would be able to marry a woman with past sins such as hers (they are quite bad), but we are now on a journey of faith together. We attend mass weekly, pray and do bible study together. I must keep reminding myself that I was just as bad as she was, and if she doesn’t deserve forgiveness then why should I?
I would be lying if I said there were no doubts in the back of my mind, but I think (hope?) that these are normal when making such a huge life decision. Something that gives me a bit more confidence is that she is still very young and has plenty more time to engage in sins of the flesh without worrying about her biological clock, but she has chosen me as the one she wants. I am the first man she has ever had that encouraged any kind of faith in her. I hope she is not doing it just to please me, but I believe she is showing a very sincere desire to get closer to God. Often times she is the one dragging me out of bed to attend mass on Sunday (although I’m much better now).

One main reason that I can forgive her of her sins is the fact that she doesn’t seem to have lost her ability to pair bond, despite her numerous sexual partners. She treats me really well and expresses child-like love and affection toward me. I truly hope that this works out and we spend our lives together, and I hope God is pleased with me bringing a fallen woman back into his care. I am aware of the risks involved, still, I have come to the decision that all I can do is try my very best and leave the rest up to God.
 

DelMarMisty

Sparrow
Woman
I think there are of course degrees to these categories. I would say I could be two categories, grew up in a traditional family who despite being Christian, didn't propose curfews on me growing up and were quite free and trusting with me travelling alone, going out to bars etc. I swayed, not dreadfully, but came back. Perhaps, it depends on the level of sin. To be considered a 'post-repentant' as described in this article, for example, implies that the level of sin was enormous. It could be less so and the woman could have still have repented without the huge baggage.
 

Based

Sparrow
Sadly most Western women these days have been so run through that they cannot love even if they desperately tried. These women are also the most boring conversationalists for an intelligent man, so much so that talking to them hurts. Most women these days have been taught that the gash between their legs makes them an unimpeachable princess.
 
I am engaged to a ‘post repentant’ woman.. I never thought I would be able to marry a woman with past sins such as hers (they are quite bad), but we are now on a journey of faith together. We attend mass weekly, pray and do bible study together. I must keep reminding myself that I was just as bad as she was, and if she doesn’t deserve forgiveness then why should I?
I would be lying if I said there were no doubts in the back of my mind, but I think (hope?) that these are normal when making such a huge life decision. Something that gives me a bit more confidence is that she is still very young and has plenty more time to engage in sins of the flesh without worrying about her biological clock, but she has chosen me as the one she wants. I am the first man she has ever had that encouraged any kind of faith in her. I hope she is not doing it just to please me, but I believe she is showing a very sincere desire to get closer to God. Often times she is the one dragging me out of bed to attend mass on Sunday (although I’m much better now).

One main reason that I can forgive her of her sins is the fact that she doesn’t seem to have lost her ability to pair bond, despite her numerous sexual partners. She treats me really well and expresses child-like love and affection toward me. I truly hope that this works out and we spend our lives together, and I hope God is pleased with me bringing a fallen woman back into his care. I am aware of the risks involved, still, I have come to the decision that all I can do is try my very best and leave the rest up to God.
I was engaged to a very similar kind of woman. We ended our engagement in January. I think she would have and will make a great wife to someone else. I just wasn't ready. Time is the other factor here. As I learned early in my faith, there is such a thing as God's will but there is also God's time. I believe it's possible we may get back together, but the timing wasn't right yet. Hopefully for you two, both are aligned.
 

MKE-Ed

Robin
Originally posted on RooshV.com

girl-slavic-trad-1024x683.jpg

The hardest thing for a Christian man to do is choose his wife. Unless God gives him a direct revelation of who to marry, he is on his own when it comes to making a decision that will assuredly involve hesitation and doubt. While I can’t begin to offer guidance on whether you should give a yes or no to a certain woman, I can share knowledge on three broad types of women and how seriously you should consider them for marriage.

1. Traditional women​




A woman who is born in an explicitly traditional family has been given God- or pagan-centered morals since birth, even if those morals weren’t taught to her as coming from God the Father. She has a healthier conscience and is therefore more resistant to falling into sin, and when she does fall, she does not stumble badly. She may have a failed relationship or two under her belt, and perhaps an experimental one-night stand, but no drug addictions, tattoos, double-digit notch counts, or abortions.

With her traditional upbringing, she never saw the need to repent and be born again because she was never fully oriented towards sin. If she slips, a period of confession and prayer may be all she needs to get back on track. She will not appear particularly religious because she is mostly living by morals instilled in her since childhood.

Because the Christian faith in the United States has become so badly corrupted, I would not classify women raised in Christian households as traditional unless it is clear that her family home is an extension of the church, void of worldly entertainments and influences, with a father that acts as a firm patriarch. Most traditional women you encounter will have immigrant parents, usually Muslim. Young Armenian women, for example, don’t have much of a church or prayer life, but they were raised with enough morals centered around family that they are closer to God than nominally Christian American women.

The marriage potential of women from traditional families is quite good, but beware that they may not want to learn new ways of worship and their faith may not deepen, so what you see is what you get. It is also the case that if you marry a traditional woman, you are marrying the family. If her family is pleasant then this will be an asset when raising children.

2. Pre-repentant women​




If a woman wasn’t born in a traditional God-fearing family, she will likely be far from God. Starting at a young age, she became addicted to the pleasures of this world and will attempt daily to re-create paradise on earth to be “happy” instead of preparing for the Paradise of the next life. Any faith she does possess will be New Age in nature, centered around yoga and “oneness” with the universe.

Even though a woman like this may not be necessarily evil, she is serving the will of Satan by not directly worshipping her Creator or following her God-given conscience. A close examination of her past will reveal innumerable sins that have not been sacramentally confessed, and when it comes to men, she will try to find one who makes her feel good through temporal emotions and material benefits instead of one who can help assure the salvation of her soul.

A pre-repentant woman is especially dangerous because since puberty she learned to maximize her sexuality to lure a man of status. In effect, she’s a hypnotist of men who match her degraded spiritual state. She will badly deceive many men into thinking she’s a good life partner when in actuality she is merely a good sex partner. (Nearly all of the women I had relations with prior to coming to Lord Jesus Christ were in this category.)

We are taught by Saint Paul not to get yoked with non-Christians, so I would not consider marrying a pre-repentant woman. There is absolutely no guarantee she will ever take up the faith and unless she has the rarity of a soft heart, chances are she will continue to fall and take you down with her. If I meet a woman in this category, I would gently share the Gospel with her or give her the Jordanville prayer book to get her on the right track.

3. Post-repentant women​




When a woman is truly repentant, she re-orients her mind and body away from sin. Within a short amount of time, her entire life changes, from her beliefs to her behavior. Repentance is so transformative that her face may even begin to look different. No longer does she dress immodestly, attack men with feminist talking points, or fornicate. It will be obvious when a woman repents because she is no longer who she used to be.

A repentant woman is likely to have a heavy suitcase of past sins that the man she marries will have to forgive and accept. While a woman who has multiple tattoos and has slept with 25 or more men is justified by God upon repentance, not every man will be able to stomach her past. Allow the man who can accept her past to marry her, and if that man isn’t you then let her go so that she may continue her search for a husband. If God intends her to marry then she will marry.

It is critical for you to discern true repentance from a woman who is simply trying a new dating strategy. Some women, when they get older, realize that they cannot hook a man through sexuality, so they put on a veneer of false modesty and grace without any internal change to the soul. Other women, in a rush to beat their biological clock, will simply lower their standards and temporarily pretend to be more pleasant than they really are.

True repentance involves a full turning away from the old self. When a repentant woman discusses her past, you should sense a mournful attitude of how she used to live, followed soon by a clear and unambiguous declaration of Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior. You must be able to discern a woman who is attempting to please God and one who is simply trying a new tactic to receive a worldly benefit, and the only way you can properly do that is if your own faith is genuine and strong.

If you can accept the past of a post-repentant woman, her suitability for marriage is high since she has made a decision of her free will to pursue Lord Jesus Christ. In some respects, her potential may be higher than the traditional woman since she has already danced with the devil and therefore will be more inclined to say no to temptation in the future.

Conclusion

I am a post-repentant man. Even though my parents were immigrants of traditional backgrounds, they raised me in a purely secular manner. My adult life up to middle age was completely wasted on sin and excesses of the flesh. If you’ve been following me for some time then you have witnessed that repentance is total and all-encompassing. The harder someone has fallen, the more manifest their repentance will be, and I am no exception.

Once you understand the three spiritual states of women, you can make better decisions about whether to pursue a courtship or not (if you’re a woman looking for a husband, these states also apply to men). If a woman is pre-repentant, give her a sermon and the name of a suitable Orthodox Church. Ignore how her beauty or personality make you feel, because I don’t need to tell you the consequences of choosing the wrong woman for marriage. Otherwise, proceed with God’s help. Approach your wife selection with spiritual eyes to make the decision that God knows is best for you.

Read Next: Only God Can Find You A Good Wife
Permalink
This is a very accurate breakdown of where a lot of women are at today spiritually. Sadly, the majority of the women that I’ve met within the past couple of years fall under category number 2. They are very empty spiritually and lack the basics of any moral framework. We live in very sad times.
 

Nikos225

Chicken
Married for 20 years to pre-repentant: A warning to young men

I'm a life-long Orthodox Christian (baptized as infant), but like most men of my generation abandoned the faith when I went off to college. I met a non-Orthodox, non-Christian woman and we got married. Even after I re-joined the church about 10 years into our marriage she remained a proud unrepentant woman. We already have three children, all baptized Orthodox at my insistence, but my wife insists on using air quotes when she says the word "God." She is a quintessential modern woman, and we are light years away in terms of faith. She thinks it weird to see me reading scripture or arguing that Christianity is any better than any other yoga-style new age ideals.

Of course I made a commitment to her many decades back, and we have three children, so I will not divorce her at this stage. It is my cross to bear. I do my best to share my faith with my children, but as far as marriage goes, it is mostly a quiet misery. Not a sob story, a WARNING-- choose your spouse wisely. Remember that a truly faithful partner is exceedingly rare these days, and unfortunately in our depraved age 9 out of 10 men are better off becoming monastics.
 

Roosh

Cardinal
Married for 20 years to pre-repentant: A warning to young men

I'm a life-long Orthodox Christian (baptized as infant), but like most men of my generation abandoned the faith when I went off to college. I met a non-Orthodox, non-Christian woman and we got married. Even after I re-joined the church about 10 years into our marriage she remained a proud unrepentant woman. We already have three children, all baptized Orthodox at my insistence, but my wife insists on using air quotes when she says the word "God." She is a quintessential modern woman, and we are light years away in terms of faith. She thinks it weird to see me reading scripture or arguing that Christianity is any better than any other yoga-style new age ideals.

Of course I made a commitment to her many decades back, and we have three children, so I will not divorce her at this stage. It is my cross to bear. I do my best to share my faith with my children, but as far as marriage goes, it is mostly a quiet misery. Not a sob story, a WARNING-- choose your spouse wisely. Remember that a truly faithful partner is exceedingly rare these days, and unfortunately in our depraved age 9 out of 10 men are better off becoming monastics.
I have met men in a similar situation as you. It is a form of martyrdom. Bless you for keeping your vow before God.
 

J.E.

Robin
I met a non-Orthodox, non-Christian woman and we got married. Even after I re-joined the church about 10 years into our marriage she remained a proud unrepentant woman. We already have three children, all baptized Orthodox at my insistence, but my wife insists on using air quotes when she says the word "God." She is a quintessential modern woman, and we are light years away in terms of faith. She thinks it weird to see me reading scripture or arguing that Christianity is any better than any other yoga-style new age ideals.
That sounds horrible man. There is a reason why Ezra (Esdras) sent the pagan wives and children away whom the Isrealite men had married: they served other gods, and it is usually the mother who has the greatest influence in raising the children. Homogeneity is one of the greatest contributors to salvation, especially when having your own family.

Is there no amount of dread game that could fix your marriage?
 

Roosh

Cardinal
That sounds horrible man. There is a reason why Ezra (Esdras) sent the pagan wives and children away whom the Isrealite men had married: they served other gods, and it is usually the mother who has the greatest influence in raising the children. Homogeneity is one of the greatest contributors to salvation, especially when having your own family.

Is there no amount of dread game that could fix your marriage?
You're in the wrong forum if you think "dread game" is what keeps marriages healthy.
 

Nikos225

Chicken
You're in the wrong forum if you think "dread game" is what keeps marriages healthy.
That sounds horrible man. There is a reason why Ezra (Esdras) sent the pagan wives and children away whom the Isrealite men had married: they served other gods, and it is usually the mother who has the greatest influence in raising the children. Homogeneity is one of the greatest contributors to salvation, especially when having your own family.

Is there no amount of dread game that could fix your marriage?

I admit I had to look up the term 'dread game.' I appreciate your advice but it isn't exactly my style. Although my wife and I do not share Christian faith, I try to keep in mind that she bore me three healthy children and did not object to baptizing them Orthodox. It is unfortunate that our connection marriage-wise is not based in faith, but rather on the day-to-day superficialities. I do consider that domain of my life to be a kind of martyrdom as Roosh suggests, which is why I use it as a cautionary tale to those younger than me.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Luna Novem

Woodpecker
Woman
I think there are of course degrees to these categories. I would say I could be two categories, grew up in a traditional family who despite being Christian, didn't propose curfews on me growing up and were quite free and trusting with me travelling alone, going out to bars etc. I swayed, not dreadfully, but came back. Perhaps, it depends on the level of sin. To be considered a 'post-repentant' as described in this article, for example, implies that the level of sin was enormous. It could be less so and the woman could have still have repented without the huge baggage.
I agree. I have no "drug addictions, tattoos, double-digit notch counts, or abortions" in my past, but I was raised in what I'd call a "culturally Catholic" home. I went to public schools, had a mom who worked, made plenty of poor choices as a teen, and was into all the typical movies and music of the era. So I'm partially woman #1 but not to such an extreme.

Of course I'm also already married and in my 40's. Maybe all of this is meant to apply more to younger women of today.
 

messaggera

Woodpecker
Woman
Married for 20 years to pre-repentant: A warning to young men

I'm a life-long Orthodox Christian (baptized as infant), but like most men of my generation abandoned the faith when I went off to college. I met a non-Orthodox, non-Christian woman and we got married. Even after I re-joined the church about 10 years into our marriage she remained a proud unrepentant woman. We already have three children, all baptized Orthodox at my insistence, but my wife insists on using air quotes when she says the word "God." She is a quintessential modern woman, and we are light years away in terms of faith. She thinks it weird to see me reading scripture or arguing that Christianity is any better than any other yoga-style new age ideals.

Of course I made a commitment to her many decades back, and we have three children, so I will not divorce her at this stage. It is my cross to bear. I do my best to share my faith with my children, but as far as marriage goes, it is mostly a quiet misery. Not a sob story, a WARNING-- choose your spouse wisely. Remember that a truly faithful partner is exceedingly rare these days, and unfortunately in our depraved age 9 out of 10 men are better off becoming monastics.

Men seeking a wife need to hear stories similar to yours.
Hoping the wife does not disrespect you in front of the children.

The story is rather common in family law, and parental alienation happens so casually in some relationships. Often times than not it is the mother who does the alienating; in turn harming the child's development, and relationship with the father.

The average age for emotional maturity is 32 for a female, but most modern women marry right out of college (23-24) and have children. Once children are older (and are attending school) it is easier for a secular progressive mother to find opportunities to occupy her time. Some mainstream trend becomes enticing and she feels that need to connect back to her individuality prior to motherhood (most women go through a transition after having a child, but it differs among women on if the transition is positive or negative for the family).

You are a good man for having Christianity at the center of your heart, and raising your children with your faith. With devotion, God's help, and love for your children you will get through these trying times; and be better prepared for the plan He has for you and your children.

May God give you the strength you need to raise your children.
 

bcolcord

Chicken
Woman
Great post, Roosh! I'm not entirely sure where I fall as a woman, though I think more traditional. This post really hits hard being that I am a woman. It devastates me that there are so many women out there who fall in the second category and unfortunately they are the ones who men see most often. I have a few great women around me who I see as good, gracious, loving, pure women, but almost all are married. I wish I had more friends like this to introduce to the many men I know seeking out a good Godly partner. In my age group (late 20s to early 30s), I still see so many living empty lives, so many expecting a man to be perfect when they clearly aren't (who is?), so many willing to flaunt themselves for nothing more than momentary attention. I'm sure you've read Rosseau's Emile or On Education. It's a wonderful book with a lot of light shed on the roles of men and women, namely how women truly seek out the attention of men. I hate that I agree with this, so many women are out there to tempt you men, to make it harder on you. I pray for all of you strong disciples of Christ to remain vigilant in your faith and commitment to God above all things.
 
A good article Roosh. The first type of woman is the best in my opinion. They may not be religious but they understand God's order and relationship between men and women on a fundamental level, something you cannot teach a post university Western girl. They can learn it in an intellectual manner, but it will take ages before they internalize the perspective and the respective virtues necessary to change (if they even bother).

Why didn't you include a fourth category, like the "pious girl" or something similar? I visited churches in which the girls were raised very godly and never strayed from the just path. There is a meekness, quietness, and gentleness in their soul you feel purifed by just being in their presence, and they are genuinely interested about Christianity in general and the doctrines of their denomination in particular. What I mean you can talk with them about some men's topics and it is invigorating for them and not boring. They have the mind of a man but the heart of a woman. As Dr Van Helsing said in Dracula, these are truly the best creatures among women.
 
Top