30 Days of Group Praying for Tradwife and Nofap

get2choppaaa

Ostrich
Well howdy fellers, I have a bit of an update for you. I have went on two dates since beginning this project.

The first was last Sunday. Nice girl, met on Upward, she seemed pretty in her pictures. She alluded that she was tall, which didn't bother me, because I was still taller than her. When she shows up she was ginormous, definitely taller than she said and very big boned, plus a little chubby. Nice girl, but basically catfished me. She also reversed her stance very quickly to align with mine over trivial matters which I found odd.

Second date was earlier today. This girl looked as good or better than her pictures so I was happy with that. She was really sweet and pleasant, good conversationalist and had good perspectives which I really appreciated. The huge, major sticking point for me, is that she is Orthodox and proclaimed that she does not believe gay sex is a sin. I am not making this up. It was brought up because she mentioned that she is liberal and I invited her to explain, no judgment from my end.

I am probably gonna go on another date with her, because I did enjoy my time with her, but I feel like this is ultimately a suicide mission because if she basically writes off doctrine because of her feels, I think we will have bigger problems later on down the road.

I have begun entertaining the idea, that if I don't get married by 35 that I may become a monk.
Not agreeing about the gay sex thing would be a deal breaker for me if this can't be resolved with her priest. It's just as much a sin as fornication.

Usually when a woman tells you something about them, you should listen.

If she says she is liberal she probably is.

I am hopeful for you... But doubt this one will work out to be the trade wife you seek.
 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
Not agreeing about the gay sex thing would be a deal breaker for me if this can't be resolved with her priest. It's just as much a sin as fornication.

Usually when a woman tells you something about them, you should listen.

If she says she is liberal she probably is.

I am hopeful for you... But doubt this one will work out to be the trade wife you seek.
She is actually having a meeting with her priest regarding this very topic. I am always optimistic, sometimes to my own detriment. My friend said something wise about himself that I realized applied to me as well. He said that he always wants things to work and so he *tries* to make it work, even early on when he probably shouldn't. So this time around I am going to go much slower. That is another advantage of Christian dating. You don't have fornication or physical contact clouding your judgment with hormones.

Haha, well as a guy a little bit older, the 35 year old thing made me laugh.
There's still plenty of time. I'm a few years older and just now several friends are getting married for the first time, some are over age 40.
I didn't really hit big success with women until 30, when they really start to notice you.

I am really enjoying all the positivity in this thread, particularly during the lockdown times.

A couple of points I will make:
1) If you are struggling with a big change (ie giving up masturbation / fornication) consider doing a fast at the same time. Your body will be reacting to the lack of food and will feel differently than it normally does, and this will be a constant reminder to you of your goal and can help keep you from slipping.

2) The orthodox girl who doesn't believe gayness is sinning... My old self would have said as long as she isn't gay herself then it doesn't matter how she judges others, but I now have 2 close family friends who are claiming they are "lesbian." I have a more liberal view on homosexuality in that I'm open to the idea that some of it is a naturally occuring thing that a certain percentage of people will have a same sex attraction (whereas the vast majority of it is created in our society ie Nature vs Nurture).

But the difference is whether you act on that attraction or not. You sin if you fornicate or lie with someone of the same sex. If you are merely attracted only, it's no different than me being attracted to curvy latinas, as long as we don't act on our desires, but acting on a homosexual or heterosexual desire out of marriage is sinful.

A sick society is one that encourages people to sin, and a mother that doesn't stop her daughter from claiming she is lesbian is a very real threat to your family in 2021. It's fine if she doesn't want to condemn others for gayness, but if she is truly not opposed to the idea of homosexuality, I don't see how she could be a good wife. If this woman won't be able to tell her daughter "No you are not a lesbian, that's ridiculous" then you will be on your own. Schools and classmates and corporations are all encouraging gayness today.

If she truly doesn't believe gay *sex* is a sin, as you stated, then she needs to discuss that with her priest.
I agree that she is sinning with this belief. We went on another date and I explained my viewpoint on why homosexuality is Biblically incorrect and also most likely a result of trauma like most other sexual deviances. I have a hard time condemning her for that viewpoint because she really does seem to be struggling with the internal conflict because she does seem like a genuine Christian who is just trying to be compassionate toward all people. She is in fact having a meeting with a priest to discuss this very issue. She seems to be more in a moment of doubt than having solidified one way or the other.

I agree that I can't make a future with someone who thinks this way however, so I am going to hold out on getting emotionally involved with her until she figures this out.
 

Max Roscoe

Pelican
Orthodox Inquirer
The viewpoint on gay stuff is wrong, but you can't expect non-Amish people raised in America to be correct on the social issues. There is constant propaganda, not just that it's ok to be gay, but that buttsex and promiscuity is something brave and awesome to be celebrated.

In other words, it is only "normal" to expect someone in our 2020 society to have some weird and unnatural viewpoints, because the authority figures are telling us this every day.

Particularly when churches do not condemn homosexuality, it really can't be the fault of a woman if she believes what the authority figures are saying. She needs a strong man, her father, her spouse, or a strong institution, such as the church, or in a saner society like the Taliban or China or Russia, the government, to tell the people proper and healthy social thoughts to have. We have the inverse of this, and therefore a woman who obeys her authority figure is not to be shamed or shunned, but CORRECTED.

I've said before, I fear more the rabid pro-"right" political woman much more than I do someone who is simply mislead. Because it is not a woman's place to be constantly challenging the truth or the order. You do NOT want that in your wife.

Society only works when people follow the rules, and the masses were never supposed to be obsessed with "truth" the way many of us are. Truth was supposed to be an inherent value in the society, and the citizen didn't need to constantly battle its leaders who today are lying to us.

it is only in Current Year where we have this bizarre dichotomy that breaking rules and societal norms (which are now mass immigration and child trannies and harmful injections and mask wearing and anal promiscuous sex) is a duality of good and bad.

In short, don't blame her, but just show her the truth.
Figure out how best to appeal to her, and show her through examples, testimonials of former gays, religious teachings, whatever will most resonate with her. If she is receptive, she will make a good wife. If not, it doesn't matter so much whether she believes in pro gay or anti gay, she is in rebellion and will be a disaster for you.
 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
The viewpoint on gay stuff is wrong, but you can't expect non-Amish people raised in America to be correct on the social issues. There is constant propaganda, not just that it's ok to be gay, but that buttsex and promiscuity is something brave and awesome to be celebrated.

In other words, it is only "normal" to expect someone in our 2020 society to have some weird and unnatural viewpoints, because the authority figures are telling us this every day.

Particularly when churches do not condemn homosexuality, it really can't be the fault of a woman if she believes what the authority figures are saying. She needs a strong man, her father, her spouse, or a strong institution, such as the church, or in a saner society like the Taliban or China or Russia, the government, to tell the people proper and healthy social thoughts to have. We have the inverse of this, and therefore a woman who obeys her authority figure is not to be shamed or shunned, but CORRECTED.

I've said before, I fear more the rabid pro-"right" political woman much more than I do someone who is simply mislead. Because it is not a woman's place to be constantly challenging the truth or the order. You do NOT want that in your wife.

Society only works when people follow the rules, and the masses were never supposed to be obsessed with "truth" the way many of us are. Truth was supposed to be an inherent value in the society, and the citizen didn't need to constantly battle its leaders who today are lying to us.

it is only in Current Year where we have this bizarre dichotomy that breaking rules and societal norms (which are now mass immigration and child trannies and harmful injections and mask wearing and anal promiscuous sex) is a duality of good and bad.

In short, don't blame her, but just show her the truth.
Figure out how best to appeal to her, and show her through examples, testimonials of former gays, religious teachings, whatever will most resonate with her. If she is receptive, she will make a good wife. If not, it doesn't matter so much whether she believes in pro gay or anti gay, she is in rebellion and will be a disaster for you.
I agree that when searching for a partner you basically have to be prepared to accept that people will have worldviews very contrary to yours. The problem is that there is basically fifteen to twenty years of context that go into our respective different worldviews. Social justice is a cult, and getting someone to turn their back on a cult is something that even paid professionals have a very hard time doing. I agree that in a healthy society people should basically be able to trust authority, but these modern young women are so far left, even getting them to not be appalled by positions that ten years ago would have been considered politically moderate is an incredible challenge.

Anyway, we hung out again and basically decided that our worldviews were too different, she wanted diversity in her society and her government, but not in her relationships, go figure. Lol.

The other thing that sucks is how you mentioned that "I fear more the rabid pro-"right" political woman much more than I do someone who is simply mislead", because you are dead on the money. I have noticed that liberal girls often have more of the feminine spirit, they are soft, fashionable, creative, sweet, charming, whimsical, etc. But then conversely they are very easily hurt and shocked at people disagreeing with them, so it is almost impossible to form relationships with them. I have noticed conservative women are very hard, judgmental, and un-nurturing.

Oh well, back to the drawing board. Even in our failures it is important to thank and praise God. For example, in this instance, I thank Him that he allowed it to end before I became attached and deeply involved. And who knows, maybe I have more to repent for, or maybe I am going to die soon and don't need to leave a family behind, or any number of reasons. All I know is that I have to keep faith that God's plan for my life is the best of all possible plans, and that he is primarily concerned with my salvation.

Back on topic with the thread, I noticed I have completed my thirty days, but I have decided to keep praying for all of us. It has been very spiritually beneficial, and the only two times I slipped up with nofap in the last 45+ days were on days where I did not say our prayer.

I really want to thank all of you guys for participating in this journey. Your posts and insights have brought me incredible amounts of joy and feelings of camaraderie :)
 
The other thing that sucks is how you mentioned that "I fear more the rabid pro-"right" political woman much more than I do someone who is simply mislead", because you are dead on the money. I have noticed that liberal girls often have more of the feminine spirit, they are soft, fashionable, creative, sweet, charming, whimsical, etc. But then conversely they are very easily hurt and shocked at people disagreeing with them, so it is almost impossible to form relationships with them. I have noticed conservative women are very hard, judgmental, and un-nurturing.

I wonder if they did a similar study on rabidly conservative women this also applies:

They are also often quite enthusiastic with Guns and other Manly things Men are into. I noticed.
 

Max Roscoe

Pelican
Orthodox Inquirer
I have noticed that liberal girls often have more of the feminine spirit, they are soft, fashionable, creative, sweet, charming, whimsical, etc. But then conversely they are very easily hurt and shocked at people disagreeing with them, so it is almost impossible to form relationships with them. I have noticed conservative women are very hard, judgmental, and un-nurturing.
Bingo. The problem is giving females authority and power.

It's pointless to get mad at women for their group behavior: They are just doing what they naturally do.
Just as I don't get mad at a child for acting childlike. But I don't put them in control of society.

Liberal women who "welcome refugees" are acting on the inbred nurturing instinct that drives them to look out for the weak, the ill, etc. which is necessary for a community to exist. So I'm not mad at them for that. It's just the female dynamic at work.

Women who fight for "diversity" are coming from the place of acceptance, and not wanting anyone left out (social ostracization is, for a female, the worst thing in the world). But under sane guidance, these same women could be hard core racists in an ethnostate, and these energies would be directed towards the "outcast" men in that society (perhaps the handicapped, sickly, etc.)

In a rational society, men would say "no" and limit something like refugee migration, and then the women's nurturing instincts would be directed to their own people, and society would not be falling apart. Instead, childlike people are our leaders and there is no order or structure.

But it's foolish to be upset at the women themselves. I'm upset, instead, at the people who give them political and social power. They are valuable, essential, priceless members of a community but they should not be our leaders.
 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
I wonder if they did a similar study on rabidly conservative women this also applies:

They are also often quite enthusiastic with Guns and other Manly things Men are into. I noticed.
I can believe that feminist activist women are masculinized, because as an activist you are in a combative and adversarial social position. I am more talking about the every day college girl who just wants to fit in and believes the same things everyone around her does but can't tell you why, other than that is just how she feels.

I am going to think hyper conservative women are probably also more masculinized, but maybe through other means. I think masculine women become feminist activists because they reject their female identity. Conservative women seem to have more a "male brain" that is more focused on rationalizing rather than empathizing.

Bingo. The problem is giving females authority and power.

It's pointless to get mad at women for their group behavior: They are just doing what they naturally do.
Just as I don't get mad at a child for acting childlike. But I don't put them in control of society.

Liberal women who "welcome refugees" are acting on the inbred nurturing instinct that drives them to look out for the weak, the ill, etc. which is necessary for a community to exist. So I'm not mad at them for that. It's just the female dynamic at work.

Women who fight for "diversity" are coming from the place of acceptance, and not wanting anyone left out (social ostracization is, for a female, the worst thing in the world). But under sane guidance, these same women could be hard core racists in an ethnostate, and these energies would be directed towards the "outcast" men in that society (perhaps the handicapped, sickly, etc.)

In a rational society, men would say "no" and limit something like refugee migration, and then the women's nurturing instincts would be directed to their own people, and society would not be falling apart. Instead, childlike people are our leaders and there is no order or structure.

But it's foolish to be upset at the women themselves. I'm upset, instead, at the people who give them political and social power. They are valuable, essential, priceless members of a community but they should not be our leaders.

I remember in c*llege learning about the civil rights movement in America and Brown V Board of Education, and seeing all these pictures of people holding signs saying things like "GO HOME N*GGER" and being shocked that almost all the people protesting where women. It was a bit of an eye opener for me for sure. I put the dots together that the feminists of today are the spiritual descendants of the racists/nationalists of yesteryear. They basically just take on whatever the flavor of the month is and internalize it and make it their own identity.
 
Bingo. The problem is giving females authority and power.

It's pointless to get mad at women for their group behavior: They are just doing what they naturally do.
Just as I don't get mad at a child for acting childlike. But I don't put them in control of society.

Liberal women who "welcome refugees" are acting on the inbred nurturing instinct that drives them to look out for the weak, the ill, etc. which is necessary for a community to exist. So I'm not mad at them for that. It's just the female dynamic at work.

Women who fight for "diversity" are coming from the place of acceptance, and not wanting anyone left out (social ostracization is, for a female, the worst thing in the world). But under sane guidance, these same women could be hard core racists in an ethnostate, and these energies would be directed towards the "outcast" men in that society (perhaps the handicapped, sickly, etc.)

In a rational society, men would say "no" and limit something like refugee migration, and then the women's nurturing instincts would be directed to their own people, and society would not be falling apart. Instead, childlike people are our leaders and there is no order or structure.

But it's foolish to be upset at the women themselves. I'm upset, instead, at the people who give them political and social power. They are valuable, essential, priceless members of a community but they should not be our leaders.

Women's nurturing instincts should be directed towards their own families rather than outsider Men they don't even know are even good or not.
 

Max Roscoe

Pelican
Orthodox Inquirer
You know the quote Jack Nicholson has about women "I think of a man and then take away reason and accountability"?

The women who are on the forefront of any movement (extremists) are channeling pure emotion and passion. Think of the most crazy thing one of your exes ever did, and then imagine that energy directed towards any movement (racism, antiracism, feminism, war, etc). They will behave with unrestrained raw emotion, untempered by reason.

Remember how the most depraved photos from Abu Gharaib were of female soldiers? Yeah there were bad men there too (many say the ones typically directing the torture were often Jewish deep state agency types, and the Jewish male is a feminized archetype) but your typical man realizes the roles could easily be reversed and there is SOME small amount of warrior respect that keeps them from doing certain things to his enemy.

I'll never forget how this Nicaraguan revolutionary looked at me (they give tours to this day in Leon) telling me how the women were the most passionate and fearsome in their movement. He pointed to a picture of one throwing a Molotov cocktail with fury in her eyes.

It is the duty of a patriarchy to divert energies (particularly feminine, but all energies) toward productive and healthy paths. That is the entire role of the historical church outside of Sunday services. And it's all but gone today.
 
You know the quote Jack Nicholson has about women "I think of a man and then take away reason and accountability"?

The women who are on the forefront of any movement (extremists) are channeling pure emotion and passion. Think of the most crazy thing one of your exes ever did, and then imagine that energy directed towards any movement (racism, antiracism, feminism, war, etc). They will behave with unrestrained raw emotion, untempered by reason.

Remember how the most depraved photos from Abu Gharaib were of female soldiers? Yeah there were bad men there too (many say the ones typically directing the torture were often Jewish deep state agency types, and the Jewish male is a feminized archetype) but your typical man realizes the roles could easily be reversed and there is SOME small amount of warrior respect that keeps them from doing certain things to his enemy.

I'll never forget how this Nicaraguan revolutionary looked at me (they give tours to this day in Leon) telling me how the women were the most passionate and fearsome in their movement. He pointed to a picture of one throwing a Molotov cocktail with fury in her eyes.

It is the duty of a patriarchy to divert energies (particularly feminine, but all energies) toward productive and healthy paths. That is the entire role of the historical church outside of Sunday services. And it's all but gone today.

This is why I believe involvement of women in Politics and War in general is counter-productive. The sense of Honor and Restraint that Men displays more often tempers the evils that would otherwise result.

Law and Justice suits the Masculine Temperament. In this manner Men very well reflects God in that respect:

I don't want a Soap Opera but involving Guns and Tanks.
 
Yeah there were bad men there too (many say the ones typically directing the torture were often Jewish deep state agency types, and the Jewish male is a feminized archetype)

Innovations of the Rabbinic Scholars in making circumcision far more traumatic since 140AD must have contributed


 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
Update: Temptation is very strong this evening. Please pray for me if you read this. I have not given in yet, but I think tonight will be a long battle. However, I must admit that I have gotten better at fighting off the stronger temptations. In the past if a temptation this strong hit me, I would have instantly rolled over. God is growing my spiritual muscles. I must thank Him and not let Him down!
 

Max Roscoe

Pelican
Orthodox Inquirer
Prayers for you brother!
One big awakening for me with pornography was when I realized every time I was drawn to view it, it happened to be Sunday. With the lockdowns I wasn't attending church anyway and it was just an obvious Satanic temptation that made the evil of pornography so much more visible to me. I should have been in church but instead Satan was tempting me with salacious women.

Ive found something as simple as walking around the neighborhood can be a solution.

Get thee away, Satan!
God is Good!
 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
Prayers for you brother!
One big awakening for me with pornography was when I realized every time I was drawn to view it, it happened to be Sunday. With the lockdowns I wasn't attending church anyway and it was just an obvious Satanic temptation that made the evil of pornography so much more visible to me. I should have been in church but instead Satan was tempting me with salacious women.

Ive found something as simple as walking around the neighborhood can be a solution.

Get thee away, Satan!
God is Good!
Thank you, I made it through last night. Basically I had to pray and prepare myself for a fight. I knew it was going to tough so I strapped in and basically said "bring it on" and it worked!

Funny you mention that, but Sunday has typically been the hardest day of the week for me. At first I thought it was because Sunday afternoon I typically didn't have much going on, but then, like you, I came to the conclusion that something satanic was at foot.
 

soli.deo.gloria

Woodpecker
Orthodox Inquirer
Gold Member
Thank you, I made it through last night. Basically I had to pray and prepare myself for a fight. I knew it was going to tough so I strapped in and basically said "bring it on" and it worked!

Funny you mention that, but Sunday has typically been the hardest day of the week for me. At first I thought it was because Sunday afternoon I typically didn't have much going on, but then, like you, I came to the conclusion that something satanic was at foot.
I have also noticed what seems to be patterns. I won't go into details but suffice it to say some of the more degenerate and extreme stuff seems to be promoted on certain days. I've also noticed a lot more specifically evil stuff recently (as in the description contains the words evil or devil or sin, etc, or it involves specific offenses against God or the Church, or the "actors" have very specific kind of tattoos and images on their bodies or clothing). I can't count the number of time's I've noticed this, and not just with respect to pornography either. In a way I am thankful they are so open about it as that has in some ways helped me to fight temptation.
 

DeusLuxMeaEst

Pelican
Orthodox Inquirer
Gold Member
The devils are also especially active at 3 am as this is the inverse of 3 pm when Our Lord died on the Cross. It is good to always say a short prayer & make the sign of the Cross upon waking for whatever reason before going back to sleep.

Strange that I see the same patterns in Sunday is the most difficult day and the middle of the night thing.

I seem to have very explicit lustful dreams during no fap and sometimes I wake up around 3 AM.
 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
Hey guys, just wanted to stop by and give a little update. I haven't been on the forum in a while just due to being busy with life.

The weekend before last I decided I had "been doing a good job" and decided to cut loose and go drinking at a bar. I got very intoxicated, missed church and skipped praying that night. I made the same mistake last weekend. I think I need to cut out drinking entirely, unless maybe it is a very special occasion like a wedding or something. Even then it would probably be better to abstain. My problem is that my primary friend group is all very much still big into the drinking and party scene.

Some guys have been talking about getting tired of it, but it's like we don't know how else to spend a weekend night and all have FOMO. I'm hopefully moving into a bigger living space soon, so maybe I can host game nights or something like that.

At any rate I have still been praying for you guys. I hope you all are doing well and if anyone has any updates they would like to share I'd love to hear them.
 

kel

Ostrich
Some guys have been talking about getting tired of it, but it's like we don't know how else to spend a weekend night and all have FOMO. I'm hopefully moving into a bigger living space soon, so maybe I can host game nights or something like that.
This is a very good idea. Game nights, dinners, even just co-working during the day on your laptops. Doing nothing, but doing it together.

Having a nice place is very good when dating, as well.
 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
This is a very good idea. Game nights, dinners, even just co-working during the day on your laptops. Doing nothing, but doing it together.

Having a nice place is very good when dating, as well.
None of my friends have remote work/computer jobs. The groupchat we share does add a sense of community during the days though!

Hopefully it isn't too much of a plus or the spirit of iniquity will arise in the women I'm seeing! :p
 
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