I had assumed it was just because of my oddball writing/communication style, but this makes a lot of sense.
33 Things Christian Men Should Know About Women
- Thread starter Roosh
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Friends with benefits is no different than fornication... Celibate would be a better option.
It's incredibly sad that this is usually true, because being able to cook really well is the #1 thing that can potentially help a woman overcome the impediment of being predisposed to weight gain, when seeking a husband. For men who ARE willing to consider women who are whatever degree of over-ideal that they find acceptable, it's probably the first thing they ask: can she cook?
I snipped a little peek at the pictures I've posted on (anon) Gab, of foods I've made over the last 2-3 months that were worth taking a picture when I happened to have a camera handy, and it's definitely a collage of reasons why my husband thinks I'm worth keeping around even when I am "massively overweight." It's also a collage of reasons why my husband is not as slim now himself as he once was.
I don't have any daughters (yet?), but whether I ever do or not, I hope to one day be in a good position to teach young women how to cook and run a proper kitchen. There's one young lady in my circles who is about the closest thing I've ever had to a little sister, who has managed to reach adulthood relatively pure and innocent (she has been exposed to some bad things, but I don't think she's ever even kissed a boy), and I hope to take her under my wing somewhat, and help her both to find her way in the kitchen AND to lose the few extra pounds she's carrying. She's a very sweet girl and has some very good/beautiful features, strong symmetry, and a lot of potential. And the desire to improve. And the desire to be married in the not-too-distant future.
I'm not over here trying to be like "Hey, have you tried FAT GIRLS? They're great! You should get over being repulsed by them."
(It's more like "Hey, fat girls! There is hope for you! You can slim down and learn how to cook!")
I know there are some gems out there who just need a nudge in the right direction, and in a lot of cases, some severe correction of ideas they've been taught and information they've been fed for a long time that are just WRONG.
My gut says that if I could line up a good man who would be willing to marry her conditional upon her reaching a healthy weight in a reasonable timeframe and demonstrating that she can keep it in check over the course of the engagement and fit into a certain dress on her wedding day (and it doesn't matter that her current weight, which is not THAT bad, is a turn-off because he will only see her and be around her in a modest and lady-like state of dress until the wedding night), AND if she could be assured that it is "okay" for her to abandon academic and career pursuits that she is presently being pressured into from every direction, similarly to the way I was at her age... I suspect there would be a fairly immediate and genuine transformation.
Since that seems like an entirely unrealistic scenario, I will have to try my best to help motivate her with hypotheticals. I will not be telling her that it's okay to be pudgy just because she's not huge, or that a good man who isn't wrecked would think she's a hottie, or anything like that, for the record. One thing she has going for her is that she is very frank in discussing her weight and body composition, and wants to change it, and is willing to learn better habits.
(No, I'm not looking for husband applications for her... yet. Just saying, there are some very sweet young women out there who are overweight for reasons quite aside from having horrible entitled gluttonous personalities. In many cases they are ignorant, having been taught wrongly or not at all, and some of them in the 16-20 age bracket are highly salvageable in terms of fitness and appearances, if they receive the correct instruction. For SOME MEN with certain priorities, just ignore it if you're not one of them, these young women are worth considering. Yes, they are about as rare as every other kind of girl who has a decent shot at not being wrecked/insufferable/intolerable by 35, but they exist.)
Maybe it's because I'm a weirdo myself I can make sense of the way you write, Pussy Riot.
Oh here's what I missed, now this makes sense. You're being a typical woman, advocating understanding and compassion towards others (God forbid women ever stop doing this). while ignoring principle, whereas the guys on here are speaking on principle. So you just end up talking past eachother. You need both. You need a standard, and that which will help people reach up and aim toward that standard. You can't just pretend the standards don't exist, because if standards/the good doesn't exist, then neither does beauty, and if beauty doesn't exist, why change at all?
You would agree that it's a good thing that your current dating interest is eating healthier and has lost weight, right? Then you're in agreement with the men at some level. You may see it as callous, but men generally operate on principles, conceived images and habits.
I think some of the men go a little too far, or perhaps they haven't been able to step back from the realm of images. I'd disagree with NotLARPing here, as smoking/drug use (sensual pleasures), and gluttony are different vices, I don't think one's better than the other, as the smokers/drug users are generally more promiscuous, they're just different demons and different personality types handle one better than the other.
(For the record, I stand with my earlier posts a few pages ago, as there's a vast realm of difference to tell others that they should have compassion on you, and for people to willingly show compassion to others)
That's because their sight is a constant reminder of their sin every time they look in a mirror. There's no helping a fat person when it's mainly willpower/desire, and seeing the world properly. What do fat chicks want others to do, slap the sugar laden Starbucks out of their hands? Surely they'd regard something like that as mean and unhelpful. If you show too much compassion to people, you cripple them, and make them resentful at the world for not accepting their faults and shortcomings.
Men and women are both endowed with distinct natures that complement each other (stating the very obvious here) but I agree with you that this excessive compassion (female ability) can actually stunt people and hinder their development when unchecked by male direction and goal-setting, just as an overly-zealous masculine approach might push people into the wrong spaces without female empathy and unconditional acceptance. A man or woman can embody both principles of course but their origin is in each sex.
Here's a prime example I posted recently on the Fat people thread, of this female tendency to show compassion without any masculine direction or displaying any action plan towards positive transformation - I'm not saying this is all women, this author seems to be quite leftist/liberal anyway, but these tendencies can go towards the extreme:
Fat people thread
There is clearly a major problem with the food quality in America. UK too. It's largely not real food at this point. Processed food is the foundation of many peoples diets, which is a terrible mistake they are making. There is more unhealthy food in the US than anywhere else. What really opened...
You really believe such a man has good impulse control and discipline as much as a thinner man? It takes real hard work to watch what one eats and going through the pain of working out week after week to become thin as per your example.
Desiring beauty isn't sinful nor is desiring a tall strong man. God designed such things because it's good. Of course character is meant to factor into it. There is no such thing as a perfect person both bodily and characterwise. But God made those desires for a good reason as I proved before.
Just because any desire can become lust. Doesn't mean it didn't originally have a good and righteous purpose.
If desiring such a perfect woman is sinful so is desiring a tall man on the part of women.
I did not say it was sinful. Men are free to choose beauty. I like beautiful things too, but it is not as big of a priority for me as good character. I dated a guy shorter than me once. He was Asian. I had to wear flat shoes all the time to not look taller than him. Maybe that is why women prefer tall men. He was thin and was in good shape, but he was not a good match for me. It is a long story. I think the experience was good though, because I learned what I don't want in a guy. That helps me know what I am looking for and it has nothing to do with a guy's weight or appearance.
The way you talk about men's desires certainly gave that impression even if that isn't your intention. We can only read and take literally what you said.
As for the rest it does go to show how in real life when we grasp more dimensions of a person including their personality then impressions change.
Preferences generally are God given even when they vary. It varies in particular ranges. But inadequate on its own without getting to know the person.
But I don't think appearances doesn't matter. I don't think it's remotely true that appearances don't matter to you at all since your instincts also help render men visible and invisible to you in your radar that's according to observed experience of many men(speaking in generalities here). Which I don't think is a problem at all.
However I do believe that your experience elevates character in evaluation. A person is a package greater than their appearance is what I think you are going for.
Cleopatra VII was able to beguile Julius Caesar and Mark Antony despite being not quite a looker for this reason. Her personality more than compensated.
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I have only dated 4 guys and I am 34. All were average looking men. I dated them because they appeared to be good Catholics with good morals and values. I think that is what matters most to me. The reason I replied to this topic is because I don't like people fat shaming, it bothers me. It is cruel and mean. Here is a short film to show how horrible it is for someone who gets fat shamed.
It's not fat shaming to state the objective truth that men are not attracted to fat women and it is unhealthy for them to be like that, as it also shows lack of discipline and usually a pretty bad personality to go along with it. As @Starlight said, gluttony is a major sin. Fat shaming is necessary for their own health and society as a whole, as women are followers and can be greatly influenced by social pressures. With the obesity rates in America right now, 'fat shaming' is one of the most important things we can do.
It is also a jewish invention, the phrase 'fat-shaming'. It gives negative connotations and is just another case of talmudic sorcery. Control the vernacular and you can control the thoughts. You know what other shaming phrase is popular? S**t shaming. Speaking the objective truth, that major sins are bad, is not ___-shaming. It is our duty to do so. I for one, will continue to 'fat-shame' the rest of my life and will feel great about it, no matter how much propaganda is forced down my throat about how telling people to, "eat-less, move-more, don't be lazy, don't be fat, and be healthy" somehow turns them into the victim and me into a terrible meany person.
It is. However for some men it actually works. As it worked for Kittytantrum.
Some take it as constructive criticism. But others don't take it so well. If fat shaming is horrible then so is all shaming period.
Overeating is sin, gluttony, if God would have loved it, he would make us look at ourselves in the mirror all fat and feel great. We don't.
It's a signal to adjust. For ourselves, but mostly for him.
And yes the shamers are sinners too, it would be better if you could help eachother be free from sin.
So they judge you to hide their sin, and you judge them to hide your sin. Double sin.
The only way out is to stop sinning in my opinion is to confess, eat less, stop complaining about other sinners. And then see what happens.
Those who are free'er from sin are more attractive and I don't mean lust inducing.
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1 Peter 3 Verses 8-11
Turn from Evil
8And in fine, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, being lovers of the brotherhood, merciful, modest, humble: 9Not rendering evil for evil, nor railing for railing, but contrariwise, blessing: for unto this are you called, that you may inherit a blessing.
10For he that will love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile.
11Let him decline from evil and do good: Let him seek after peace and pursue it:
Exactly! The change starts in ourselves.
Whenever we accuse the other of "hatespeech" "shaming" or anything, we need to look in ourselves, where we are wrong, that's where the answer is.
The Mote and the Beam
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And that goes for people like the woman in the video who tried to shame the overweight woman, by giving her a cup of coffee with the word "Fatty" written on it, her name was Patty, not Fatty. Do you think she was wrong to shame her in that way? I do.
It is a straw man argument, as the situation in the video is entirely fictional. Naming someone else's sin is tricky business. However, there can be charity in doing so. Such charity, which might change the narrative of what does or does not constitute shaming is completely eliminated in the video; Rather, it is simple malice. Catholic Saint Francis de Sales devotes a chapter to judgement in Introduction to a Devout Life (Part 3, Ch 28), an excerpt of which is a below.
www.catholicity.com
Introduction to the Devout Life: Part III, Chapter 28
www.catholicity.com
Yes.
But this is not real, it's propaganda to induce hatred to the "Karen" who doesn't exist.
It's like the Jews who make movies on them being superkind, musical, considerate and sweet and evil Nazi's going after them. This kind of secular content is divisive and pure trash in my opinion.
Rarely the fat woman is free from sin, and the slim woman "Karen" full of sin. As we can spot it ourselves. Gluttony is an indicator of sin.
It's just propaganda, that we shouldn't trust our eyes and what we know to be true, and turn it around totally.
These kind of movies are trash. With the godless "Prince EA" acting like a modern day cultish Guru, sage telling us about good and wrong.
You can hire him to speak for your company for only $50000 - $100000 to give you worldly advice on good and bad.
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But this is not real, it's propaganda to induce hatred to the "Karen" who doesn't exist.
It's like the Jews who make movies on them being superkind, musical, considerate and sweet and evil Nazi's going after them. This kind of secular content is divisive and pure trash in my opinion.
Rarely the fat woman is free from sin, and the slim woman "Karen" full of sin. As we can spot it ourselves. Gluttony is an indicator of sin.
It's just propaganda, that we shouldn't trust our eyes and what we know to be true, and turn it around totally.
These kind of movies are trash. With the godless "Prince EA" acting like a modern day cultish Guru, sage telling us about good and wrong.
You can hire him to speak for your company for only $50000 - $100000 to give you worldly advice on good and bad.
Prince Ea Speaker Bureau & Speaking Fee | Aurum Bureau
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Of course, it was fictional. But fat people get taunted and teased for being fat all the time, and everyone knows it, most people have witnessed it at some time in their life. A real example would be very difficult to get in a video. Have you ever heard of the taunt "fatty fatty two by four, can't get through the kitchen door" and what about fat jokes? Do you think fat jokes are ok? The definition of fat shaming is the action or practice of humiliating someone judged to be fat or overweight by making mocking or critical comments about their size. Do you think that it is ok to mock and humiliate a person? I don't.Yes.
But this is not real, it's propaganda to induce hatred to the "Karen" who doesn't exist.
It's like the Jews who make movies on them being superkind, musical, considerate and sweet and evil Nazi's going after them. This kind of secular content is divisive and pure trash in my opinion.
Rarely the fat woman is free from sin, and the slim woman "Karen" full of sin. As we can spot it ourselves. Gluttony is an indicator of sin.
It's just propaganda, that we shouldn't trust our eyes and what we know to be true, and turn it around totally.
These kind of movies are trash. With the godless "Prince EA" acting like a modern day cultish Guru, sage telling us about good and wrong.
You can hire him to speak for your company for only $50000 - $100000 to give you worldly advice on good and bad.
Prince Ea Speaker Bureau & Speaking Fee | Aurum Bureau
Book now social media influencer Richard Williams (Prince Ea) as a Motivational Keynote Speaker for your next event at Aurum Speakers Bureau.
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This is another straw man. And, probably not shaming (or actually happening outside of a random isolated elementary school). Is essentially calling someone who wears glasses "four-eyes" what we're really now discussing? That's bullying, not shaming. And it ends right around the time that maturity sets in, around 6th-7th grade. The term shame has been completely watered down to the point of being conflated with every critical comment, however valid.
Bahahahaha that's a good one. Going to start using that on my older sister when she comes over to watch the game, maybe she won't hog all the chips and dip that way.