Can you give me your Vasectomy Experiences?

Mike Contro Rossi

Sparrow
Orthodox
I found this article extreamly relevant and helpful concerning this topic...
He may be bright and well spoken, but the Church Fathers make things clear. No contraception should be acceptable, except abstinence. I cannot see the Church Fathers being in favor of vasectomies either, as they would clearly view such as a form of castration. St John Chrysostom makes it clear that sex in marriage is to bring intimacy between spouses but always with the possibility of bringing forth life during fertile years. You may find Christians now in the past half a century or so who will excuse birth control, but prior to 1960, you'd be hard pressed to find any that did.
 

fortyfive

Woodpecker
obviously i am not planning a childless future as I already have two. I don't see how your sarcasm is helping anyone. Are you married? Do you have children? Can you give me any insight besides sarcastic commentary about fake flue vaccines?

C'mon guys... You are sometimes more serious than my leftist mother-in-law (and that's something).

Ok, now seriously. I'm married with kids, and I'm considering every child as a blessing, not a burden. This, plus my belief that God has the upper hand on this matter in my life, prevents me from even thinking about hampering His plans.

Besides that, the only two fellows I know who got a vasectomy are my neighbor's male dogs, which other dogs, including my female dog, consider now as female and are trying to dominate them.
And I don't want to be in this transgender canine group too and be dominated by my female dog. (that was another attempt to make a joke okay?)
 
Don't get a vasectomy. Contraception is fake and gay. Dead serious. It's fake because it messes with the natural (true) state of the body, and it's gay because it's a form of transsexualism, I.E., it involves modifying fundamental sexual characteristics through surgical intervention to try to destroy part of what makes a man a man (the ability to cause a pregnancy).

Fake and gay.
 

MtnMan

Kingfisher
I appreciate the responses guys. Honestly I have a feeling In my heart that is pretty similar to what Aceofbased wrote. I wish I could have as many kids as I am blessed with but it feels like having a bunch more at my age and life situation would put unbearable stress on my household. The idea of completely abstaining from marital bonding with my wife isn’t right either. This is no easy choice but at least I have a year to work through it.
 

Jive Turkey

Woodpecker
Honestly the people shaming OP for considering a vasectomy are being pearl-clutchers, especially the guy who said he is still unmarried and addicted to young and beautiful women. Talk about a moat and a beam.

That being said God obviously created sex for more than just procreation, because if it was only for procreation it wouldn't feel good and build love. It would be a neutral, physiological process like blowing your nose or coughing. It also wouldn't need to involve two persons.

In addition, I don't see where in the Bible it said that sex is ONLY for procreation. Paul says it is better to remain unmarried. Maybe the unmarried men here concerned about OP's holiness should join a monastery ASAP since only the highest standards of purity seem to suffice for them.

However, if one is married, the Bible states one has an obligation to their spouse. Nowhere does it say, that I am aware, that married sex must only be practiced for procreation.

Serious question, should people have children to the point of poverty and to the point of dying from medical complications? Should every family have 16 children running around in a one bedroom apartment with tattered clothes and being able to eat nothing but rice and beans?

Of course using prudence and discernment in spacing out children must be okay. Just like it is good to labor, God permits us to rest. It is good to procreate, but children are a gift of love from God. Some here seem to act as if we are supposed to burden ourselves with more children than we can feasibly and responsibly care for.

There is nothing wrong with disagreeing with one another, but people here are often so eager to be harsh and sanctimonious. Reproach should always be as gentle as can possibly get the message across.

By long forbearance a ruler is persuaded, And a gentle tongue breaks a bone.
Proverbs 25:15
 
Sterilization is a particular form of artificial birth control, characterized by the additional evil intent that the frustration of the marriage act is meant to be permanent. It is surgically accomplished in a man by a double vasectomy, preventing the sperm from having access to the prostate and the seminal fluids. It is done in a woman by tubal ligation, preventing the fertilization of the ovum by the sperm from taking place.

It is a mortal sin, and is forbidden by the Church’s law precisely because it is against the natural law. The natural law is man’s participation in the Eternal law of God, and through it every rational creature recognizes in his conscience his own goal and the right means to attain it. It is a secondary but clear precept of the natural law that "the primary end of matrimony is the procreation and the education of children," as is defined by canon 1013, §1 of the 1917 Code of Canon Law. Sins that frustrate this end, inscribed by the natural law in every man’s conscience, are called sins against nature because they are a willful perversion of the order of nature.

Pope Pius XI has this to say about all such forms of artificial birth control:​

No reason, however grave, may be put forward by which anything intrinsically against nature may become conformable to nature and morally good. Since, therefore, the conjugal act is destined primarily by nature for the begetting of children, those who in exercising it deliberately frustrate its natural power and purpose sin against nature and commit a deed which is shameful and intrinsically vicious. Small wonder, therefore, if Holy Writ bears witness that the Divine Majesty regards with greatest detestation this horrible crime and at times has punished it with death …the Catholic Church …through Our mouth proclaims anew: any use whatsoever of matrimony exercised in such a way that the act is deliberately frustrated in its natural power to generate life is an offense against the law of God and of nature, and those who indulge in such are branded with the guilt of a grave sin (Casti Connubii, Pauline Books, pp.28, 29).​
All artificial birth control is consequently against the Church’s positive law, as well as against the natural law.

Pope Pius XI has this to say in particular about sterilization:​

"Furthermore Christian doctrine establishes, and the light of human reason makes it most clear, that private individuals have no power over the members of their bodies than that which pertains to their natural ends; and they are not free to destroy or mutilate their members, or in any other way render themselves unfit for their natural functions, except when no other provision can be made for the good of the whole body" (ibid. pp.35, 36).​
The theologians (e.g., Prummer, Manuale theologiae moralis, II, §6) further explain that a person does not have an absolute dominion or right over his body. He simply has control over its use, as a steward over his master’s property. He must consequently always use it according to the will and law of God. Sterilization is a form of self-mutilation, like the cutting off of a hand, and is a grave insult to God who gave the faculty to engender children.

The perversion involved in sterilization is that it is a procedure which is never done for the health of the whole body, but only and simply to frustrate procreation. Even in the case of a mother who already has many children, and who is too sick to bear any further children, sterilization (i.e., tubal ligation) is immoral and a mortal sin, for it is only through the frustration of the natural end of the marriage act that her health is helped, that is only through a perversion of nature. The end does not justify the means. One cannot do evil that good may come of it. In such an instance a couple must practice abstinence.​
 

rouchno1fan

Pigeon
Orthodox Inquirer
My brother had it done (I think his wife pressured him into it as a kind of penance for her having their children: I can't imagine them having a particularly active sex life. I wonder how common this sort of thing is).

Anyhow very soon after the vasectomy he had an "appendicitis" scare that turned out to be some sort of infection which I think cleared up after a few weeks. I think it was definitely related to the surgery as all these things are somehow connected. The moral of the story is don't start hacking up bits of your body to suit your lifestyle.
 
Good responses here. I have also heard vasectomy increases chance of testicular cancer.
I’m in a similar boat. While we are open to as many children as God blesses us with, we just had our 4th a few days ago, 13 months after our 3rd. My wife was not able to breastfeed during pregnancy, so we had to formula feed her, which was tragic. Now she cannot even pick up the the 1 year old.
she needs a break from being pregnant, and we do not really have a plan from it happening. Right now my only hope is to pray for strength to abstain.
 

wiseape

Pigeon
Orthodox
Natural Family Planning requires the man and the woman to do a couple things that are almost unheard of these days: 1) learn about and understand the female cycles of fertility and 2) exercise a reasonable amount of sexual discipline within the marraige. It is perfectly possible to have a normal and satisfying sex life within a marriage without mutilating yourself. Your relationship will be more healthy and your communication will be more open.

The answers to life’s challenges do not always require you to submit your sexuality to the pharmaceutical or or surgical industrial complexes.
 

wiseape

Pigeon
Orthodox
Good responses here. I have also heard vasectomy increases chance of testicular cancer.
I’m in a similar boat. While we are open to as many children as God blesses us with, we just had our 4th a few days ago, 13 months after our 3rd. My wife was not able to breastfeed during pregnancy, so we had to formula feed her, which was tragic. Now she cannot even pick up the the 1 year old.
she needs a break from being pregnant, and we do not really have a plan from it happening. Right now my only hope is to pray for strength to abstain.
And when you say you must abastain please realize that if you seek to naturally space children, abstainance is only required for a small number of days each month. It is certainly not beyond the capabilities of anyone with a modicum of discipline and self control. Indeed developing discipline and self-control is a good thing.
 

ginsu

Kingfisher
That is probably true. Just looking forward, having my first child when 36 really challenged both of us physically and mentally. I actually think its a bad idea to have children into our 40's for many reason. Unfortunately we got a late start, but I cannot go back and change that now. I think an unintended pregnancy in my 40's (and wife in her 40's) is not a good idea.
You can look into vasectomy but if you decide not to then you can also change your perception on this situation.

Instead of calling it unintentional you can also see it as intended by nature/god if it does happen. If a pregnancy wasn't supposed to happen in a woman's 40's then it would be impossible by nature.

The chances are already much lower and that together with simply practicing abstinence around the ovulation it would have to be a miracle for her to get pregnant.

If its a miracle that she got pregnant then it can't be bad. It would have to be some really strong and determined sperm / egg that's good too.

miracle baby vs unintentional baby is a big difference.

I suspect that the term of unintentional and other framing surrounding pregnancy are concepts that we have been taught to harm us.

Pregnancy is an intended consequence of sex.
 
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Normally, I steer as far away from the medical system as possible, and I do not like the idea of a vasectomy. However, for our life, we are pretty firm that we don't want to be having kids into our 40's.
The short answer is don't do it.
What would be the solution? There is an app to calculate her ovulation. I never know personally someone who use it, just google "app for ovulation" During her ovulation use condom or if you can control yourself, pull out.
Any unnecessary surgery is harmful.
I am not a doctor, this is not a medical advise. Just sharing information.
 
And when you say you must abastain please realize that if you seek to naturally space children, abstainance is only required for a small number of days each month. It is certainly not beyond the capabilities of anyone with a modicum of discipline and self control. Indeed developing discipline and self-control is a good thing.
Of course, that is where natural family planning comes in. 4 kids, its not like my wife and I get much alone time anyway. It is just very difficult to time ovulation while breastfeeding.
 

Laner

Hummingbird
Gold Member
Religious grounds aside, I would never do it. Never.

I know a few men close to me who have done it and the physical side effects are striking. After the course of a year or two, they get a 'face' about them that I used to call 'AIDS Face' (for example, look at talking heads like Don Lemon or Anderson Cooper and pay close attention to the skin around the mouth). But now I am forced to look at this as a Eunuch face. If the guy is in shape with a runners body - typical of men in their early 40's here) they tend to look like lesbians. If they are larger frame, burlier men then they tend to take on a cherubic quality.

I imagine its the feeling of being de fanged. There seems to be no threat to them anymore, and I have noticed that some of the more important life decisions are met with with little resistance to the herd. Especially right now, when men with testicular fortitude are in such low supply, its shameful to know they just shrug and say, "Follow the Science!" and carry on following directions from the government.
 

king bast

Kingfisher
I had it done about 10 years ago, because at the time we were agreed that we didnt want any more kids. It wasnt a particularly traumatic experience, everything healed without issue after a week or two, but a few years on and I wouldve been happy to "accidentally" get her pregnant again. Sadly, I wont get that chance, and it is my own fault.
 
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