Catechesis Periods & Afterwards

[7-5]

So I was guided to the Orthodox church in my [REDACTED AREA OF RESIDENCE] and last August, I took a month long or so Catechesis class.

Been making services when I can, have grown to love the coffee hour on Sundays (one of the last to leave) and the priest tells me I can be baptized on the 8th of April, God willing.

I can't seem to shake this feeling that it's not long enough. Have I established a prayer rule? Yes.
Have I discussed good Orthodox content at coffee hour? Yes.
Have I bonded with some people and even gotten to know them outside the church? Yes, deacon included.

I just... Idk... Kinda thought things were gonna be more rigorous.
That's not right, the truth is this: I feel as though I haven't 'proven myself'. I can't shake this feeling.
I know its not necessarily up to me and I know time limits aren't meant to be totally rigid.
Is this just the besetting presence of the demons trying to delay necessary spiritual nourishment?
Or am I just being insecure?


I also don't know the protocols for church politics once officially baptized. Do I just... Start going to parish meetings? Do I wait for an invitation? Take initiative and offer help?

Everyone has been more than welcoming and I feel guilty for even being this close to suspicious. I just... Don't want to mess this up.

Can anyone give some 'Your first semester' tips to an 'incoming freshman'?

 

[Iacobus]

At the end of the day, baptism is only the beginning of your struggle as an Orthodox Christian. So there's no way to be truly "ready" for it. You want to join the church, you understand the seriousness of the spiritual commitment, so what reason could there be to hold yourself back from receiving the sacraments that your priest is prepared to offer you? Unless it's the commitment itself that intimidates you perhaps? But overall it seems that you're overthinking. Do your best to be a repentant and humble Orthodox Christian, offer help when and how you can, participate in the Liturgy and sacraments, and there's nothing you can mess up.

 

[7-5]

At the end of the day, baptism is only the beginning of your struggle as an Orthodox Christian. So there's no way to be truly "ready" for it. You want to join the church, you understand the seriousness of the spiritual commitment, so what reason could there be to hold yourself back from receiving the sacraments that your priest is prepared to offer you? Unless it's the commitment itself that intimidates you perhaps? But overall it seems that you're overthinking. Do your best to be a repentant and humble Orthodox Christian, offer help when and how you can, participate in the Liturgy and sacraments, and there's nothing you can mess up.

I suppose you're right.

Perhaps I'm more afraid of poorly navigating conflict in the parish.
Or even of succumbing to pride when I get approached to take on a leadership position (this happens to me alot, being approached. Taking initiative and 'owning it' simply brings on new problems).

Maybe that attitude of caution is needed... I'll pray for more humility.

Thank you.

 

[Lawrence87]

So I was guided to the Orthodox church in my [REDACTED AREA OF RESIDENCE] and last August, I took a month long or so Catechesis class.

Been making services when I can, have grown to love the coffee hour on Sundays (one of the last to leave) and the priest tells me I can be baptized on the 8th of April, God willing.

I can't seem to shake this feeling that it's not long enough. Have I established a prayer rule? Yes.
Have I discussed good Orthodox content at coffee hour? Yes.
Have I bonded with some people and even gotten to know them outside the church? Yes, deacon included.

I just... Idk... Kinda thought things were gonna be more rigorous.
That's not right, the truth is this: I feel as though I haven't 'proven myself'. I can't shake this feeling.
I know its not necessarily up to me and I know time limits aren't meant to be totally rigid.
Is this just the besetting presence of the demons trying to delay necessary spiritual nourishment?
Or am I just being insecure?


I also don't know the protocols for church politics once officially baptized. Do I just... Start going to parish meetings? Do I wait for an invitation? Take initiative and offer help?

Everyone has been more than welcoming and I feel guilty for even being this close to suspicious. I just... Don't want to mess this up.

Can anyone give some 'Your first semester' tips to an 'incoming freshman'?

Maybe you can address this with your priest? Tell them you are a bit concerned that you might be rushing things, ask them their thoughts about whether your worries are justified.

It's cliched but going to the internet for advice on these matters will probably not get you very far. Some guy might be like 'dude, you need to be a catechumen for three years!' whereas others might just encourage you to go ahead and get baptized. So the best thing would be to talk to the priest himself about your concerns.

 

[7-5]

Maybe you can address this with your priest? Tell them you are a bit concerned that you might be rushing things, ask them their thoughts about whether your worries are justified.

It's cliched but going to the internet for advice on these matters will probably not get you very far. Some guy might be like 'dude, you need to be a catechumen for three years!' whereas others might just encourage you to go ahead and get baptized. So the best thing would be to talk to the priest himself about your concerns.

Well, that was my first instinct, but...
He was the one who asked initially.

Said I could wait past Lent if I really wanted to. I figured the difference between a month or so was inconsequential.
Was considering asking my deacon.

Idk, maybe I'll just call the priest.

Far as asking people on the internet: This community has given me excellent info and examples. I consider it a good source.

 

[Iacobus]

I mean if I were you I wouldn't miss the chance to partake in Holy Communion at Pascha! It's quite blessed but discussing with your priest is always the right call when in doubt.

 

[Lawrence87]

Far as asking people on the internet: This community has given me excellent info and examples. I consider it a good source.

Of course. I didn't mean to cast aspersions on the good folk on this forum. In general though it's not so much the people responding but the nature of the question that is the issue.

Some people are able to convert to Orthodoxy with relative ease, people who are motivated and read catechetical books in their spare time with eagerness etc. Others might be more slow, they might be less enthusiastic about reading, they might have things from their past to untangle from and so on. So the pace can vary and usually it's down to the priest to discern this.

When I was catechized, it was pretty quick, but my priest at the time was satisfied that I was learning enough off my own back and was eager enough that I didn't need a huge amount of time. But every priest has a different approach.

I'd say that you should trust his judgement and also be frank with him about any concerns you have. This man is going to be the director of your spiritual life, it can be good to just go with his suggestions, even if your own self will has apprehensions.

It's also true that baptism isn't the end of catechism (perhaps in an official sense it is) but you never stop learning. If you are sure Orthodoxy is the way, and are committed to it then put yourself in your priest's care and go ahead and get baptized. May God bless you

 

[7-5]

When I was catechized, it was pretty quick, but my priest at the time was satisfied that I was learning enough off my own back and was eager enough that I didn't need a huge amount of time. But every priest has a different approach.

This really helps, actually, thank you.
Perhaps he has seen more than one such as myself and knows: 'He'll be fine'.

I don't know why I hadn't considered that before.
Maybe I was subconsciously being cynical and thinking: 'He's the interim priest... Maybe he's trying to up his numbers...' (God help me from my unduly suspicious nature.)

There were others in my class who've already been chrismated, perhaps I've indeed been over thinking things.

Now...
Any quick tips on navigating group dynamics at the parish? Haha

 

[Lawrence87]

Now...
Any quick tips on navigating group dynamics at the parish? Haha

You may have to elaborate on this a little

 

[7-5]

You may have to elaborate on this a little

Well...
I'm used to the secular world. Bar-room or party-house dynamics. Corporate world dynamics (read: applied disingenuity over time).

The closest thing I've ever had to a functional group was my fraternity chapter. And back then I was too busy drinking & smoking to go to most meetings. (Maybe that's not true, but I feel like I contributed minimally during my time there)

So I find myself asking: 'Do the normal rules apply here?'
'Do I even have a good sense of "normal", given my past experiences?'

I got pretty good at obtaining the ends I wanted at the bars and parties (First, adulation. Then, to be left alone.) Do I act the same way but for better ends (learning about God? Helping the fellow parishioners?)

Are there protocols at Churches I'm unaware of? I was warned of 'parish politics' pretty early on by my deacon (a man of now advanced age)... What should I look out for? Is confrontation viewed with the same dishonest eye it is in the corporate world?


What are the differences in social dynamics between secular life and church life? Surely there's something former PUAs and revellers have noticed during their conversion.

 

[Lawrence87]

Well...
I'm used to the secular world. Bar-room or party-house dynamics. Corporate world dynamics (read: applied disingenuity over time).

The closest thing I've ever had to a functional group was my fraternity chapter. And back then I was too busy drinking & smoking to go to most meetings. (Maybe that's not true, but I feel like I contributed minimally during my time there)

So I find myself asking: 'Do the normal rules apply here?'
'Do I even have a good sense of "normal", given my past experiences?'

I got pretty good at obtaining the ends I wanted at the bars and parties (First, adulation. Then, to be left alone.) Do I act the same way but for better ends (learning about God? Helping the fellow parishioners?)

Are there protocols at Churches I'm unaware of? I was warned of 'parish politics' pretty early on by my deacon (a man of now advanced age)... What should I look out for? Is confrontation viewed with the same dishonest eye it is in the corporate world?


What are the differences in social dynamics between secular life and church life? Surely there's something former PUAs and revellers have noticed during their conversion.

I don't know really how to answer, other than to say don't overthink it.

The church is not magical. People will annoy you, you will be annoyed about people and so forth. Just go, be yourself and use the relationships and bonds that you develop as a means of cultivating Christian virtue.

There tends to be people I interact with regularly, people I am good friends with, and people I don't really interact with a lot. I don't really see much confrontation at my parish at all. I'm sure I annoy people from time to time, and I occasionally get annoyed by other people, but it's nothing that Forgiveness Vespers doesn't fix. I honestly wouldn't overthink it, go, make connections and handle it as it comes.

 

[7-5]

I don't know really how to answer, other than to say don't overthink it.

The church is not magical. People will annoy you, you will be annoyed about people and so forth. Just go, be yourself and use the relationships and bonds that you develop as a means of cultivating Christian virtue.

There tends to be people I interact with regularly, people I am good friends with, and people I don't really interact with a lot. I don't really see much confrontation at my parish at all. I'm sure I annoy people from time to time, and I occasionally get annoyed by other people, but it's nothing that Forgiveness Vespers doesn't fix. I honestly wouldn't overthink it, go, make connections and handle it as it comes.

Yeah, you're probably right.

And for what it's worth: I've made some good connections so far.
Guess I'm just afraid of making a bad impression.