Dating coach claims that women go crazy at 26, and are only wifeable after quarter life crisis

He doesn’t look like he lifts. I wouldn’t really trust a guy that gives off, “the best thing I got going is that I can grow a beard and be white” vibe. He seems like a simp. To any guy who doesn’t lift, start.

edit: I watched the first 15 seconds. Couldn’t go longer, you would never want this guy in a foxhole with you.
 
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But then, most women don’t do strangers in night club toilets. And most seem to be hoping (every time) that a sexual encounter will lead to LTR (although some may experiment briefly with intentional one-night stands—and in most cases find them unsatisfactory). My guess is that many to most women never intentionally have a one-night stand, and only console themselves afterward that it’s “okay” and that they had a good time and didn’t expect anything more.
Too many women have heard from too many men about the “third date rule” and resigned themselves to giving up the goods quickly, for fear that otherwise even a potential “Mr. Right” will walk away. Of course, most third dates or mini relationships DON’T result in marriage. So of course the numbers add up before the man who wants and is “ready for” marriage finally appears.

The only way this can change is for us men to STOP walking away if we don’t get what we [think we] want by the second or third or twentieth date, and to stop (implicitly or explicitly) threatening to do so. We must renounce “the takeaway”, renounce “dread game”—and maybe renounce “game” altogether. Because saying we just miiight be open to commitment if only we can “test drive that car” is wrong. Especially, but not exclusively, if we already know we’re not at all open to commitment. And because male “game” is at least a major cause of high female notch counts.

That’s right; we ourselves have at least in large part created this situation.
No, I think men have to own the fact that most men are so desperate that they tell ugly girls they are pretty. Women have so many orbiters these days. If man would just start respecting themselves and have some standards. Too many simps. Makes it bad fir everyone else. Losers giving money to only fan THOTs, thinking that somehow they have a relationship with that woman. Sure she thinks of you when she spends your money on her boyfriend. Pathetic. Men need to wise up. Better to be alone and true to yourself and be productive, than chase trash.
 

Days of Broken Arrows

Crow
Gold Member
What happened to our society?

It used to be that you'd leave high school, get married, and that was that.

Now you need a "dating coach" to find a mate, a "career coach" to figure out what it is you want to do with your life, and even a "sex coach" for when you're married and someone has issues with their idiotic "libido."

There's also "executive coaching." I guess that's for people too stupid to know how to work the water cooler since that's about all "executives" do these days. And there's "Christian life coaching" for people who never heard there is a book called "The Bible."

There are also "life coaches" and "life skills coaches." Pretty soon we'll have two societies: One made up of people who do things and the other comprised of people who "coach" them every step of the way.

And by the way, back when I was in high school, we would exercise by simply picking up weights and running. Easy enough, right? Guess not, because now you need a "trainer" to do what a bunch of goofy teenagers did by instinct.

Pretty soon Americans won't be able to go to the bathroom without some creepy shadow figure coaching them on how to use toilet paper and flush. I see America's future, and it's "commode coaching."

Good night.
 
What happened to our society?

It used to be that you'd leave high school, get married, and that was that.

Now you need a "dating coach" to find a mate, a "career coach" to figure out what it is you want to do with your life, and even a "sex coach" for when you're married and someone has issues with their idiotic "libido."

There's also "executive coaching." I guess that's for people too stupid to know how to work the water cooler since that's about all "executives" do these days. And there's "Christian life coaching" for people who never heard there is a book called "The Bible."

There are also "life coaches" and "life skills coaches." Pretty soon we'll have two societies: One made up of people who do things and the other comprised of people who "coach" them every step of the way.

And by the way, back when I was in high school, we would exercise by simply picking up weights and running. Easy enough, right? Guess not, because now you need a "trainer" to do what a bunch of goofy teenagers did by instinct.

Pretty soon Americans won't be able to go to the bathroom without some creepy shadow figure coaching them on how to use toilet paper and flush. I see America's future, and it's "commode coaching."

Good night.

This is what happens when you empower women. When they are in leadership positions, their instincts still tell them they need someone to defer to. This is why women read self-help books so much, and hire all these "coaches". Then effeminate men follow their lead and do the same.
 

FullThrottleTX

Woodpecker
I am 35 years old and I have a very shallow life experience about it but everyone who gets married under 25 is unhappy, this goes for both men and women. Many divorces happened due to lack of experience in adult life, lack of maturity, lack of financial structure, and pressure to get married (I was raised in the church where to have sex it was necessary to get married)

living together helps in the jealousy crisis, increases intimacy but does not strengthen the relationship.

getting married because of pregnancy works if the couple has been together for years.

getting married after 30 seems the norm for my generation.

this business of marrying daddy’s virgin i can’t glimpse for myself, because i already tried to relate to protected middle class girls and it was the biggest pain in the ass, the girl is always invoking the presence of the spirit of daddy patriarch, and i I cannot compete with the provider dad to satisfy the princess' requirements.

I understand that the ideal of marrying a virgin before the age of 25 to have many children away from all current cultural pollution is an ideal, but it does not work because the economy does not collaborate, culture does not collaborate, families do not collaborate.
in real life people have suffered lives, emotional problems, they betray and are betrayed, they are infertile, they lose interest, they lose their notion.I am 35 years old and I have a very shallow life experience about it but everyone who gets married under 25 is unhappy, this goes for both men and women. Many divorces happened due to lack of experience in adult life, lack of maturity, lack of financial structure, and pressure to get married (I was raised in the church where to have sex it was necessary to get married)

living together helps in the jealousy crisis, increases intimacy but does not strengthen the relationship.

getting married because of pregnancy works if the couple has been together for years.

getting married after 30 seems the norm for my generation.

this business of marrying daddy’s virgin i can’t glimpse for myself, because i already tried to relate to protected middle class girls and it was the biggest pain in the ass, the girl is always invoking the presence of the spirit of daddy patriarch, and i I cannot compete with the provider dad to satisfy the princess' requirements.

I understand that the ideal of marrying a virgin before the age of 25 to have many children away from all current cultural pollution is an ideal, but it does not work because the economy does not collaborate, culture does not collaborate, families do not collaborate.
in real life people have suffered lives, emotional problems, they betray and are betrayed, they are infertile, they lose interest, they lose their notion.

Marriage is a tough business (I say this from experience).
And a lot of young people, especially in the modern times, do not have the tools to successfully manage a marriage and also do not have expectations aligned to reality.

I don't think things get better after 30. You have to share a goal with your partner and that's the secret to marital success. I'm pretty sure my sister's marriage reflects this more than anyone else because she married her high school sweetheart, and while there isn't a ton of passion/love there compared to some of the relationships I've experienced, they have some very tightly held goals that keep it going (raising children in particular). They don't have an expectation of novelty and that's really key.

After 30, marrying some older chick that has had a lot of partners is bound to fail. Her expectations are novelty and passion and that doesn't work. It's nice if passion and love are there, you need it to weather storms, but if that's the main reason for the relationship it's doomed. But virgin or not, it doesn't really matter. You want someone that shares your goals. A girl could have spent her early 20s being misguided with dating to come to terms with it in later life, for sure.
 

Dr. Howard

Peacock
Gold Member
First of all, I'm a big fan of "steelmanning" arguments, glad to see this trending more as of late. You'll do your best thinking when you give your opposition's arguments the strongest defense you can muster.

Second (and this isn't anything new, just re-stating what we all already know), even if you're right (and I do agree with you for the most part), this still leaves most Western men in a Catch-22:

Date a girl < 25 years old: subject to her capricious whims, raging hormones and ever-changing personality

Date a girl > 25 years old: deal with alpha widows, previous sexual trauma, potential STDs, tons of emotional baggage and mental instability (not to mention wasted years of fertility and higher likelihood of birth defects once you get past 30)


In the modern dating environment where everyone is encouraged to follow their feelz, it's absurd to expect women (outside the most stringent of protective circumstances, like a red pill father who refuses to pay for college and does his best to arrange potential suitors at 18, etc.) to have the self-awareness and control to abstain from the temptation and ecstasy of a laissez faire sexual marketplace.

We really should pair people off around 18-22 (and ban divorce except in the most extreme of circumstances)...this defect-defect disequilibrium doesn't seem to have any mechanism by which we can expect it to reset itself any time soon.

Excellent post, there will never be perfection, just a different set of problems.

I think overall, your best bet for marriage is marrying a woman that understands what marriage is and that the man understands as well.

For young people getting married (say both under 25) that understanding will come from their parents and/or church. If a marriage occurs when the man is say, over 30, that message should come from the man and from the woman's parents.

What is that message? I think its actually different for two young people of similar age than it is for one with a large age gap.

For young people: Marriage means that the two of you are doing life together, all of it. You will learn how to do it together, all of the good and the bad. You offend God to do otherwise, as you are in a covenant with him as well as each other.

If I look back at my young marriage, and that of others that failed a lot of the problem is being more committed to your friends than your spouse. Social media/messaging platforms only make this worse. The wife goes through her crises and personal development challenges with her friends through facebook messenger and the man goes through his with the guys over beers and maybe even 'girl' friends. This is wrong. The advantage that young people have that older spouses don't is that they can build a shared history together, they are relatively blank slates whereas older spouses have baggage. Young spouses should hit 25 with a lot of 'remember when' events together, good or bad, that made their bond together stronger. If a wife's 'remember when' stories are all from girl's nights out, and not with her husband, or the husband's are all from hanging out with other people there is a problem.

For older people: I think the marriage should be between a woman 25-26, and a man older than her by at least 10 years. The message for them should be. The man has walked the road you see in front of you, he is more wise than you and is there to guide and protect you, the woman is there to learn and help the man. I think for these older people, the woman's biggest challenge is learning to submit and the man's is learning to be patient and loving with a woman who will seem juvenile
 

wannable alpha

Woodpecker
Very sensible advice, although most women, not just hardcore feminists would be outraged today. Shows how the world worked offline before the internet. Men and women had to be social and have decent conversation skills.

 

Teedub

Crow
Gold Member
This is what happens when you empower women. When they are in leadership positions, their instincts still tell them they need someone to defer to. This is why women read self-help books so much, and hire all these "coaches". Then effeminate men follow their lead and do the same.

I get your point, particularly on deference - but it isn't women and male buzzfeed staff writers buying books like the 4 Hour Work Week. There were threads and threads about books like that on this very forum. In fact, isn't this forum (at least in its original incarnation) the red-pill male's version of a self help book?
 

SlickyBoy

Ostrich
That’s right; we ourselves have at least in large part created this situation.
We can't create that which does not lend itself to being created. If you want to point fingers at men, remember it wasn't the Chads out there, it was the beta simps in positions of power making it their life ambition to appease women, politically.

I can be the biggest Chad on the planet but in Riyadh Saudi Arabia I'm wasting my time challenging the status quo with "game" as well as potentially risking my legal status as a free man, and even my life itself.
 

Blade Runner

Kingfisher
We can't create that which does not lend itself to being created. If you want to point fingers at men, remember it wasn't the Chads out there, it was the beta simps in positions of power making it their life ambition to appease women, politically.

I can be the biggest Chad on the planet but in Riyadh Saudi Arabia I'm wasting my time challenging the status quo with "game" as well as potentially risking my legal status as a free man, and even my life itself.



Quickly, because we've talked about this a lot --- and yes we are all accountable for personal decisions --- but almost all people are forced to adapt to the changing dynamic once instituted. The gatekeepers in the ultimate sense are the powers of the purse (in the modern day) and for sex, women. If these aren't reasonable or controlled (modern, decadent west) then you see what we have seen, of what you do as a man. What's worst about it is that if limits your ability to act freely in the system since women have become hooked on other ideas meant to destroy families and increase materialism/consumerism. The proof of this is that if the free money and government father went away, things go right back to where they always were naturally. Women now have a huge selection pressure on them. Is it perfect? No, but it's the most natural and the best for everyone. How do we know? It's like the matrix or communism, we've tried all of these things many times before but some people act like they don't know which iterations fail or ruin it for the most people, which leads us to generational theory ... ok, I'll end there. ;)
 
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Quickly, because we've talked about this a lot --- and yes we are all accountable for personal decisions --- but almost all people are forced to adapt to the changing dynamic once instituted. The gatekeepers in the ultimate sense are the powers of the purse (in the modern day) and for sex, women. If these aren't reasonable or controlled (modern, decadent west) then you see what we have seen, of what you do as a man. What's worst about it is that if limits your ability to act freely in the system since women have become hooked on other ideas meant to destroy families and increase materialism/consumerism. The proof of this is that if the free money and government father went away, things go right back to where they always were naturally. Women now have a huge selection pressure on them. Is it perfect? No, but it's the most natural and the best for everyone. How do we know? It's like the matrix or communism, we've tried all of these things many times before but some people act like they don't know which iterations fail or ruin it for the most people, which leads us to generational theory ... ok, I'll end there. ;)

We are not forced to “adapt to the changing dynamic” if that means engaging in grave sin.
 

Blade Runner

Kingfisher
It is true, my point is that it's a pickle when the society makes it extremely difficult for you to find suitable partners. There is no excuse or justification for sin. However, setting people up for failure (no one gets married and lives through decades of hormones?) is just a fact of life. We can understand this and still repent --- stating it is not a sin.
 

STG

Robin
Women go crazy because they aren't in their natural role as nature intended.

When you force a biological being into a role it wasn't meant for bad things happen.

Society treating an entire generation of women like men is no different then forcing a tiger to live in a zoo and never getting to live in the wild. The tiger is hardwired to hunt, to kill, to live.

Yes, they are biologically women but they play the role of men in society by going to college and taking a career. They are meant to be nurturing, submissive, and raise children.

This is the reason most of American women are on antidepressants and unhappy even though they are more "free" then during any time in American history.
 
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