Dating in a pandemic

Vigilant

Kingfisher
Woman
Protestant
No "covid" virus has been isolated. SARS-COV2 is actually computer generated, its a code. All of Virology is nonsense, "viruses" are neither dead nor alive when you study them, and they all vary in shape and size to the point where the virology world says they are so mysterious they hardly know much about them at all. Turns out what they call viruses are actually just particles found in the human body when your body is fighting some sort of illness. They can be byproducts of fighting toxins, various types of waste in the body being expelled in order to reach homeostasis, etc. They are not transmissible, they are not identifiable as pathogens, and they certainly did not cause a "pandemic." My sister and an old lady who is a friend both got very sick this past year with the worst flu-like illness either had ever experienced. It looked a lot like "covid" but I am certain it was health related
(bad nutrition, stress, etc), and possibly technology related. Illnesses are caused by environmental factors and nutritional factors above all. Poison and metals in the water, vaccines, medications, GMO food, and all types of rotten things we consume today have serious adverse effects on our bodies and it comes to a point where your body gets overwhelmed. I think most disease today is avoidable but the medical industrial complex is wicked and profits off making you sick and keeping you sick. I think technology plays a huge part in people getting sicker too- 5G is brand new, people were already unhealthy, now they're very sick.
For example:
Spanish flu happened at the time of WWI and only in the first world. Why? The third world always gets sicker because of malnutrition and other factors. If there were a pandemic, why didn't thousands of poverty stricken South Americans die? They didn't- but thousands of young people in Europe and America did. The age of radio corresponds perfectly with the Spanish flu. Technology affects us very strongly. Also, the stress that many young women were under as they missed their husbands/sweethearts increased their weakness and tons of young people died. The men were under extreme distress in the war and many of them died of the Spanish flu. Stress causes illness. Couple that with the new technology screwing people up inside and out and you get Spanish flu. I suspect that 5G coupled with our already destroyed health these days is what caused whatever individual sick people decided to call "covid" the past year. I also think the power of the media to cause widespread panic increased peoples symptoms sympathetically, as we all know that the human mind is extremely powerful and I believe if you are living in abject terror you can become sicker and think yourself to be far sicker, and then your body will get sicker, because you have the deadly "covid" which you would have simply called the seasonal flu 2 years ago. I don't believe colds or flus are caused by viruses, I believe they are environmental and nutritional and stress related, as the body is weaker in winter and the food is lower in nutrients because it is not as fresh. There is a lot to research. Contagion is not real. Read "The Contagion Myth" by Dr. Cowen and also look into Dr. Kaufman/Stefan Lanka talking about it:
These Dr's debunked virology.
Neurosurgeon, Dr Jack Kruse and others seem to view artificial light and lack of natural light, as well as electromagnetic radiation, including 5g as being foundational in optimising ill effects, including covid.
 

Vigilant

Kingfisher
Woman
Protestant
I ended up dating a woman from my Catholic group for about three months, relieved that I'd found someone who had my values (and figuring she likes me, why not give it a shot). It ended very poorly when it became obvious that she wanted to get serious in a big hurry, and I still didn't even know if I liked her yet. Social pressure from our mutual friends guilted me into dragging it out longer, and I still feel awful about it. (She has since gotten married to a man who isn't a Christian. It makes me feel worse in a way - did I hurt her so badly she decided to compromise all of her values to find a man?)

A situation like that is just unpleasant to a point where you're better off not dating and waiting longer. Although like a poster wrote earlier, you don't want to be the person left standing without a chair to sit in...so I've tried to figure out what works best for me. It'll continue to be a struggle.
That she compromised like that revealed that her character did not match yours. God saved you from her. You can be grateful, and I think you are.
 

TexasJenn

Woodpecker
Woman
Orthodox Inquirer
Although like a poster wrote earlier, you don't want to be the person left standing without a chair to sit in...so I've tried to figure out what works best for me.
I already have a solid backup plan for how I'll go it alone if I must. I'll sit in my own chair if it comes to that. I'm no longer afraid of it, won't compromise on the important things just to avoid being single. I'm doing everything I can, but know that ultimately it's in God's hands.
 

stugatz

Pelican
Catholic
That she compromised like that revealed that her character did not match yours. God saved you from her. You can be grateful, and I think you are.
I think that she went back to the church to find a man, that's what I've settled on.

It's a huge shame that this means you have to screen even from prospects you meet within the church - but that was always something I needed to do anyway.
 

Mancipium Mariae

Sparrow
Woman
It's a huge shame that this means you have to screen even from prospects you meet within the church - but that was always something I needed to do anyway.
If I am called to marriage, I have 3 major things that a man would have to be before I would consider dating him. (I'm Catholic, not sure what God has planned but I've visited a convent too trying to find God's will for me.)

1. Traditional Catholic- he must be in the Church, but like you say that is absolutely not everything. I've seen some major train wrecks even in the trads
2. Doesn't believe in the moon landing- sets the standard of skepticism necessary to know what's really going on. If he's moon landing based he's probably based on a lot of other things.
3. Not effeminate. Must be willing to sacrifice and pray, not just be a Catholic on the outside.

Needless to say I've found nobody, but who knows. LOL
I say all that to add to the point of how you really do have to screen people even in your Church.
 
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Christopher J

 
Banned
I say what I say objectively, not subjectively as cases vary. Don't want kids, don't date or marry because God gave us marriage for the primary purpose of child bearing. That's the standard. Obviously there are specific exceptions to things, I don't go into those because 99.9% of men and women who don't want kids today yet seek to date or marry have zero excuse and are effeminate moderns that don't want to follow natural law. I won't nitpick the .01% who might be widowed or infertile or something. But I will say that "already has kids" is it's own red flag unless one is widowed.
I agree with you. Think about the manliest men in the Bible. The idea that they marry a woman but not want kids - unfathomable. Pretty much regardless of circumstances. The more kids you are willing to have, the more faith you have that God will provide for your bigger family. Faith = masculine.
I'm not being judgmental. I'm reformed. I was effeminate without even knowing it. I thought sleeping around, getting all the pleasure I could without attachment was somehow cool or manly. Manly is being a man. Men want to get married and have kids, period.
 

Mancipium Mariae

Sparrow
Woman
Side not to the moon landing requirement- if he doesn't know about the moon hoax it's not a deal breaker right away. But if he still believes we went to the moon after I send him footage from the Nevada desert with the astronauts taking a break off set where it was filmed, or worse, still believes after looking at the temperature of the Van Allen belt and the impossibility of an aluminum lunar module being able to go through it (even more absurdly the idea of it breaking through the firmament), then Houston we have a problem.
 

Mancipium Mariae

Sparrow
Woman
I thought sleeping around, getting all the pleasure I could without attachment was somehow cool or manly. Manly is being a man. Men want to get married and have kids, period.
Absolutely. Being unchaste is lauded as manly when in reality it shows serious weakness. Real men are chaste because chastity is difficult. A man who has conquered his passions is a true man, while the effeminate man is a slave to his passions.
You should listen to "How to raise a man" talk by Fr. Ripperger if you haven't heard of it. Best talk ever I think
 

Vigilant

Kingfisher
Woman
Protestant
Your reason tends to get suspended when you're lonely, like how anything tastes good if hungry.
Very helpful.

And general lesson to us all:

"An article published last month in the journal Current Directions in Psychological Science, shows that people weigh risk and reward differently when they’re stressed.

Oddly, when you’re stressed, rather than skew to the negative, you’re more likely to anticipate a positive outcome.

While that seems like a good thing, it means missing the whole picture—and potentially discounting important negative criticisms, which you need to make a balanced decision.
If you’re stressed about money, for example, you might be more apt to accept a job that’s not the best fit.
Similarly, making rash decisions can undermine your long-term goals, even if you have the best intentions..."


Regarding stress, healthy stress is good but too much can be bad.
 

TexasJenn

Woodpecker
Woman
Orthodox Inquirer
Being unchaste is lauded as manly when in reality it shows serious weakness. Real men are chaste because chastity is difficult. A man who has conquered his passions is a true man, while the effeminate man is a slave to his passions.
I agree with that 100%. From what I'm seeing, many men on dating sites who claim to be Godly reveal clear hypocrisy and weakness in what they write and how they conduct themselves.
 

stugatz

Pelican
Catholic
Real men are chaste because chastity is difficult. A man who has conquered his passions is a true man, while the effeminate man is a slave to his passions.
There's a second kind of chaste man, though - godless men who very badly wanted to be unchaste, but ended up being chaste due to stunted social skills (or, more rarely, due to hardship or other reasons). They had bad intentions that essentially couldn't be indulged. As long as you never confuse those two, no problem.

They're also not hopeless. I've met men of this type in Christian circles - usually the ones with good character work on themselves and end up finding someone. The frustrated and angry ones don't last long, since people can usually tell when you're joining a social circle to meet women as your main priority.
 

Mancipium Mariae

Sparrow
Woman
There's a second kind of chaste man, though - godless men who very badly wanted to be unchaste, but ended up being chaste due to stunted social skills (or, more rarely, due to hardship or other reasons). They had bad intentions that essentially couldn't be indulged. As long as you never confuse those two, no problem.
They are unchaste regardless. As long as your heart is not pure, you are not chaste whether you act on your desires or not. To have a chaste mind is necessary to have a chaste body. If a man has impure desires he entertains in his heart, he is not pure at heart.
 

Kitty Tantrum

Kingfisher
Woman
Catholic
I would replace your word "external" with "extention".

For eg, a wife can be her husband's secretary, a vet nurse to her veterinary husband, farm manager of her farmer husband.
One nice thing about having a husband who is a "sole proprietor" is that I can function quite literally as an extension of him, in any capacity, and there is no need for me to ever be designated as any kind of "employee" or anything like that. For business purposes, we are basically one person.

My comfort zone is in the back-end nowhere near customers: I did his logo design, business cards, shop sign, etc., and will be building a simple website soon. Sometimes I hunt down and order materials or parts for him or do other little things if he's busy. I can have him buy materials for me, and make little things to sell in his shop. I do the taxes. Right now I've got a wash-bin with about a dozen circular saw blades in it that need to be cleaned before my husband can sharpen them, and there's at least one more batch waiting after that.

The modern industrial "workforce" has made it more difficult (by design, of course), but there are lots of ways women can essentially be "employed" by their husbands in more than a strictly home-and-family context, and I think it is well worth seeking out and building systems which allow for this, rather than accepting the systems and models our backwards culture and economy offer up as "lucrative."
 

Vigilant

Kingfisher
Woman
Protestant
There's a second kind of chaste man, though - godless men who very badly wanted to be unchaste, but ended up being chaste due to stunted social skills (or, more rarely, due to hardship or other reasons). They had bad intentions that essentially couldn't be indulged. As long as you never confuse those two, no problem.

They're also not hopeless. I've met men of this type in Christian circles - usually the ones with good character work on themselves and end up finding someone. The frustrated and angry ones don't last long, since people can usually tell when you're joining a social circle to meet women as your main priority.
I think your point is that these 'chaste' men seem chaste. Helpful insight.
 

Vigilant

Kingfisher
Woman
Protestant
One nice thing about having a husband who is a "sole proprietor" is that I can function quite literally as an extension of him, in any capacity, and there is no need for me to ever be designated as any kind of "employee" or anything like that. For business purposes, we are basically one person.

My comfort zone is in the back-end nowhere near customers: I did his logo design, business cards, shop sign, etc., and will be building a simple website soon. Sometimes I hunt down and order materials or parts for him or do other little things if he's busy. I can have him buy materials for me, and make little things to sell in his shop. I do the taxes. Right now I've got a wash-bin with about a dozen circular saw blades in it that need to be cleaned before my husband can sharpen them, and there's at least one more batch waiting after that.

The modern industrial "workforce" has made it more difficult (by design, of course), but there are lots of ways women can essentially be "employed" by their husbands in more than a strictly home-and-family context, and I think it is well worth seeking out and building systems which allow for this, rather than accepting the systems and models our backwards culture and economy offer up as "lucrative."
Your working together...
This is an important part of the foundation in rebuilding Christendom.

It reminds me of this:

"We need to keep all this in mind lest a misunderstanding occur when we speak of such things as work being "masculine" and the family and church becoming "feminized" under the aegis of Gesellschaft. This kind of femininity and masculinity is not the genuine article, but is a perverted conception. Consequently before we encourage so-called "working" women to return to the "home"; we need first to establish the right kind of work and the right kind of homes, namely homes where the man is present doing his work and the wife is helping him and where both man and wife rule the children under the headship of the man. It is not enough just to get the mother back into the home. The father also needs to get back into the home, and do his work there with his wife helping him. That is, his wife is to be his "secretary" or "administrative assistant." In contrast to this, in the Gesellschaft society a man has one woman as his helper (his secretary at work) and another woman (his wife) as his sexual partner and child-rearer. Because that in the divine design a man's wife is intended to be his helper (Gen. 2:20), his secretary at work is relating to him in a way which only his wife should. This is probably why there have been so many problems with adultery between men and their secretaries—the woman who helps you is the one you wish to unite with."

 

TexasJenn

Woodpecker
Woman
Orthodox Inquirer
Because that in the divine design a man's wife is intended to be his helper (Gen. 2:20), his secretary at work is relating to him in a way which only his wife should. This is probably why there have been so many problems with adultery between men and their secretaries—the woman who helps you is the one you wish to unite with.
Such a good point.

There's an interesting book from the 70s called "Passages: Predictable Crises of Adult Life." The author talks about how a big problem with the traditional 1950s marriage model is that many men who thought they wanted nothing more than a housewife... eventually got bored with experiencing only a certain range of all that femininity can be. Many of those men cheated with women at the office, enchanted by their relative business savvy, ability to converse on all the topics of the day, fashion/style, ambition, etc.

Of course, strong devotion to faith would help prevent this, something that's very rare these days.

But I hope we're undergoing a Renaissance of faith in these strange times.
 

Aboulia

Woodpecker
Orthodox
2. Doesn't believe in the moon landing- sets the standard of skepticism necessary to know what's really going on. If he's moon landing based he's probably based on a lot of other things.

I find it bizarre when people put such importance on trivial things, a few years ago, someone tried to convince me that the knowledge of "flat earth" was so very important, and through that is how he abandoned his occult practices and became Christian, and that others need to believe and come to the "truth" that the earth is flat. So I said to him, What does that have to do, with loving your neighbour? He got angry and walked away.

So in the same vein, what really does it matter if a potential interest believes/disbelives in the moon landing. I could care less for I see it as irrelevant. If it's false, the government lied, so what. It's not the first time, so it shouldn't be surprising. Your videos/thoughts may be helpful, for undermining unquestioning belief in government institutions, but I wouldn't elevate it to a "must believe". The fact that hate speech laws exist is proof enough that the government (or those who control it) don't actually care about truth. or honest conversation for that matter.

Covid, i understand your concern more as it directly affects everyone. I still don't take a hardline regarding what the "vaccine" does, or does not do, nor do I care what it does. All I know is that I'm not taking it, for it's completely irrational to inject yourself with mystery chemicals, to protect against a non-existent problem, especially when it's aggressively advertised, and when incentives are given to take it. Hardlines are just dangerous as they further alienate people in a world already incredibly unstable.
 

Mancipium Mariae

Sparrow
Woman
I find it bizarre when people put such importance on trivial things, a few years ago, someone tried to convince me that the knowledge of "flat earth" was so very important, and through that is how he abandoned his occult practices and became Christian, and that others need to believe and come to the "truth" that the earth is flat. So I said to him, What does that have to do, with loving your neighbour? He got angry and walked away.

So in the same vein, what really does it matter if a potential interest believes/disbelives in the moon landing. I could care less for I see it as irrelevant. If it's false, the government lied, so what. It's not the first time, so it shouldn't be surprising. Your videos/thoughts may be helpful, for undermining unquestioning belief in government institutions, but I wouldn't elevate it to a "must believe". The fact that hate speech laws exist is proof enough that the government (or those who control it) don't actually care about truth. or honest conversation for that matter.
There was a time when I would say the same thing as you have said here. In fact, I said something like this to my mom a year or two ago when she discovered the holocaust didn't happen and that the Bolsheviks projected their war crimes onto the Nazis. When presented with indisputable evidence of the statistical impossibility of the systematic murder of 6 million Jews, I said "well is it really that important whether we know this or not? Aren't there more important things to worry about?" to which she and my father replied a simple "truth matters." And that stuck with me. We most certainly never went to the moon, and this solidifies my faith quite a bit actually. Now that is anecdotal so I won't argue that side, just want to give a little insight. It makes logical sense and it coincides with the truth about the firmament and creation and the earth itself. Understanding creation matters because even the pagan learns so much about God by looking upon what He made.. Truth does matter. This is in part a joke, my "requirement" of knowing the moon landing is a hoax, but there is a method to my madness. To understand the magnitude of the lies we have been taught opens up the mind and really frees you from bondage, even on what may seem "trivial." And I really think that the more truths you learn even about secular things the closer you will become to God, because He is the way, the truth, and the life.
 

Vigilant

Kingfisher
Woman
Protestant
Such a good point.

There's an interesting book from the 70s called "Passages: Predictable Crises of Adult Life." The author talks about how a big problem with the traditional 1950s marriage model is that many men who thought they wanted nothing more than a housewife... eventually got bored with experiencing only a certain range of all that femininity can be. Many of those men cheated with women at the office, enchanted by their relative business savvy, ability to converse on all the topics of the day, fashion/style, ambition, etc.

Of course, strong devotion to faith would help prevent this, something that's very rare these days.

But I hope we're undergoing a Renaissance of faith in these strange times.
The 1950s was a facade of the family, like state schooling is a facade of education, as is restaurants are a facade of hospitality.

"The Reformation is not given quite the space in the history books nor definitely the favorable attention that the Renaissance is given.

Renaissance of course means rebirth. It was a self-conscious rebirth of paganism and humanism. Again man was the measure of all things so that society, human conduct, moral and religious questions were all to be judged in terms of man.
To call someone a good Christian was to say he was a fool. The Renaissance was a period of aestheticism as against ethics. Aesthetics instead of ethics, that is, the form, the manner, the beauty of something as against the moral question. As a result the Renaissance saw a number of very interesting developments..."
 
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