Divorce During The Phony Roni

Cervantes

Woodpecker
Woman
Sorry about what happened to you.

A few thoughts:

1. Never go to "therapy". Therapy is a jewish inversion of Catholic confession. In confession you contemplate your owb sins, present them before God and are immediately forgiven, and you are free. In "therapy" you lay bare your innermost thoughts so that the "therapist" can identify your "sins" - which are documented to use against you and for which you are never forgiven, and justify the continuation of the abusive "therapy" ritual forever.

"Couples therapy" just includes your wife against you in this ritual. It is used to document the "issues" that will be used to justify the divorce. If you come to couples therapy honestly and try to "fix" the issues she identifies that means you first have to agree with her - thereby justifying the breakup in her mind.

"Couples therapy" is also a way of submission. The man's weakness in this case further disgusts and alienates the woman.

The best answer to being asked to go to couples therapy is to make fun of it, and to refuse to go. A second best answer is to agree and to say that you will pay for the very best therapist, and will only go to one with a proven record of saving marriages. You'll never find one (except maybe the very rare Christian marriage counselors).


2. Women require men to be strong, decisive and dominant in a relationship to stay in love. Different women require more or less of this. My experience is that Slavic women (Russians, Ukranians etc.) require more of this. Historically Eastern Europe has been a flat, war torn area where men are killed often, and there is usually an imbalance of more women than men, and the surviving men are more warlike. The result is that the women tend to be more submissive and require harder men.


3. In my experience women in secular marriages divorce for two reasons: either they think they can get a better man, or because they think they will get a lot of money. Usually both reasons are in play.

You only want to prevent a divorce in a Christian marriage, and divorce is rare among couples who take their Christianity seriously. In a Christian marriage, if she talks about divorce it probably really is your fault.

In a secular marriage - once she makes a move to divorce you, trust is destroyed and you are better off not preventing the divorce. Just get out with the least damage possible. But if you want to prevent the divorce, then you have to undermine her two reasons to divorce you.

The first is to demonstrate that you can easily score a younger and more attractive woman than she is. Women get the message constantly through jewish media that they will be get a better man after divorce, and if they are reasonably attractive will get hit on by men who would like to sleep with them but would never marry them. You would have to demonstrate to her the reality that after divorce you will get a younger more attractive replacement - and that she will settle for a guy who is older and less successful. Show yourself eager to get out of the marriage also. Tell her she is right to get out now while she is "still young." If it is clearly demonstrated to her that you will do better and she will do worse than you then she will want to reverse course.

The other reason is financial. So lose your job, maybe get on disability due to "stress" or PTSD, spend money foolishly, hire expensive lawyers, spend money on the new girlfriend. etc. When a woman's motivation is financial - if she sees the financial windfall evaporating she will want to either back out, or settle the divorce ASAP to preserve at least some of the financial windfall she was hoping for. Don't worry about losing money - men can make more money more easily than women can.

Your divorce lawyer will discourage you from doing these things. Tell him you can't help it - the stress is too much.


4. Your divorce lawyer does not work for you - even though you pay him. There is no such thing as a divorce lawyer who will actually work for your interests. The lawyers are all technically "officers of the court". They see each other and the same judges all the time. Long after your divorce is over and both lawyers have forgotten all about you - each one of them still needs a working relationship with the judge and the other lawyers. So all the lawyers interests are really aligned with the divorce system. That system has a particular desired outcome in each type of case and the lawyer's real job is to help get both parties to the system's desired outcome with the least trouble possible.

Usually that outcome involves making sure there is an appropriate transfer of wealth from the man to the woman to keep divorce as an attractive option for women. Any woman who "loses" in divorce creates a warning case to other women would discourage divorce.

So keep that in mind when getting any advice from your lawyer.
 
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From my own experience with American women, they are perfectly capable of being "cold" (That's not a Russian thing). You must understand that your soon to be ex-wife has been planning the divorce for some time, so that has given her time to rationalize her decision and become comfortable with it. During my own divorce, I tried to resolve it amicably even offering her everything we owned, but she was determined to get even more through alimony. She ended up with basically nothing because we both had to hire expensive lawyers and the fees ate up all our assets.

My only advice is not to try and second guess yourself after the fact (though learning from experience is always valuable). You know the facts of the situation as it stands today. Since sadly she has already decided to leave, the only remaining issue is how much money she will take from you in the process (most lawyers can give you some idea during a free consult).
 
The other reason is financial. So lose your job, maybe get on disability due to "stress" or PTSD, spend money foolishly, hire expensive lawyers, spend money on the new girlfriend. etc. When a woman's motivation is financial - if she sees the financial windfall evaporating she will want to either back out, or settle the divorce ASAP to preserve at least some of the financial windfall she was hoping for. Don't worry about losing money - men can make more money more easily than women can.

Your divorce lawyer will discourage you from doing these things. Tell him you can't help it - the stress is too much.

I'll echo this advice. While there are technically laws that say you can't fritter away marital assets before or during a divorce, in practice I had my lawyers tell me "once the money is gone, it's gone". But make sure you save receipts for large expenditures so that you can't be accused of hiding assets. If you are not comfortable just throwing money away, your lawyer can get all liquid assets into escrow so neither party can use them (including for legal fees) and they then become a bargaining chip rather than assets SHE can hide. As for losing your job, it won't help unless you are declared officially disabled. Your income will be imputed (estimated) based on your most recent work history or government statistics of wages in your industry.
 

FactusIRX

Kingfisher
If you weren't married in a traditional Church, then you didn't have a marriage, so you were purposely sinning and spiting God by engaging in fornication outside of a Christian marriage. If you didn't have children in 7 years, then you were using contraceptives, which is another way to spite God. So, you were purposely subverting the marriage institution through a sterile, relationship of convenience (no different than a homosexual union), and you wonder why it went south.
 

get2choppaaa

Ostrich
Sorry about what happened to you.

A few thoughts:

1. Never go to "therapy". Therapy is a jewish inversion of Catholic confession. In confession you contemplate your owb sins, present them before God and are immediately forgiven, and you are free. In "therapy" you lay bare your innermost thoughts so that the "therapist" can identify your "sins" - which are documented to use against you and for which you are never forgiven, and justify the continuation of the abusive "therapy" ritual forever.

"Couples therapy" just includes your wife against you in this ritual. It is used to document the "issues" that will be used to justify the divorce. If you come to couples therapy honestly and try to "fix" the issues she identifies that means you first have to agree with her - thereby justifying the breakup in her mind.

"Couples therapy" is also a way of submission. The man's weakness in this case further disgusts and alienates the woman.

The best answer to being asked to go to couples therapy is to make fun of it, and to refuse to go. A second best answer is to agree and to say that you will pay for the very best therapist, and will only go to one with a proven record of saving marriages. You'll never find one (except maybe the very rare Christian marriage counselors).


2. Women require men to be strong, decisive and dominant in a relationship to stay in love. Different women require more or less of this. My experience is that Slavic women (Russians, Ukranians etc.) require more of this. Historically Eastern Europe has been a flat, war torn area where men are killed often, and there is usually an imbalance of more women than men, and the surviving men are more warlike. The result is that the women tend to be more submissive and require harder men.


3. In my experience women in secular marriages divorce for two reasons: either they think they can get a better man, or because they think they will get a lot of money. Usually both reasons are in play.

You only want to prevent a divorce in a Christian marriage, and divorce is rare among couples who take their Christianity seriously. In a Christian marriage, if she talks about divorce it probably really is your fault.

In a secular marriage - once she makes a move to divorce you, trust is destroyed and you are better off not preventing the divorce. Just get out with the least damage possible. But if you want to prevent the divorce, then you have to undermine her two reasons to divorce you.

The first is to demonstrate that you can easily score a younger and more attractive woman than she is. Women get the message constantly through jewish media that they will be get a better man after divorce, and if they are reasonably attractive will get hit on by men who would like to sleep with them but would never marry them. You would have to demonstrate to her the reality that after divorce you will get a younger more attractive replacement - and that she will settle for a guy who is older and less successful. Show yourself eager to get out of the marriage also. Tell her she is right to get out now while she is "still young." If it is clearly demonstrated to her that you will do better and she will do worse than you then she will want to reverse course.

The other reason is financial. So lose your job, maybe get on disability due to "stress" or PTSD, spend money foolishly, hire expensive lawyers, spend money on the new girlfriend. etc. When a woman's motivation is financial - if she sees the financial windfall evaporating she will want to either back out, or settle the divorce ASAP to preserve at least some of the financial windfall she was hoping for. Don't worry about losing money - men can make more money more easily than women can.

Your divorce lawyer will discourage you from doing these things. Tell him you can't help it - the stress is too much.


4. Your divorce lawyer does not work for you - even though you pay him. There is no such thing as a divorce lawyer who will actually work for your interests. The lawyers are all technically "officers of the court". They see each other and the same judges all the time. Long after your divorce is over and both lawyers have forgotten all about you - each one of them still needs a working relationship with the judge and the other lawyers. So all the lawyers interests are really aligned with the divorce system. That system has a particular desired outcome in each type of case and the lawyer's real job is to help get both parties to the system's desired outcome with the least trouble possible.

Usually that outcome involves making sure there is an appropriate transfer of wealth from the man to the woman to keep divorce as an attractive option for women. Any woman who "loses" in divorce creates a warning case to other women would discourage divorce.

So keep that in mind when getting any advice from your lawyer.
I don't agree with your comments about the divorce lawyer. Have you been divorced? Did you get screwed by your lawyer or something?

if you have assets get a good lawyer and don't let her screw you over. Since no kids you should be fine with parting with some stuff.

OP:

I have been through a really awful divorce with children. I'm taking my ex-wife back to court now for custody.

I spent 2 years post divorce fornicating. It did not profit me any and only made me more jaded as a man. I then met a woman whom I am married to now. We have never fought, and while everyone carries some baggage, there is zero issues with her character or integrity and she has helped me in my faith as much as I have helped her as we both bring children to the table with the plans of having more soon.

You have to recognize that there is nothing to salvage with this person. Once a woman is done and doesn't love you, they WILL NEVER Love you again.

She sounds like she was using you. I was used this way by my ex-wife also. PM me if you want stories, I need to write a book one day because some of the stuff I allowed was insane. I finally had enough and she bolted while pregnant with our second boy.

Best advice I can give:

I would say spend some time getting into physical shape, if you're fat lose weight, skinny lift weights. Get a new hobby and reinvigorate the old one you used to do.....work on your relationship with God, and judge the women you meet by their faith walk and not their looks.

You will be fine with time, but right now it feels like the world is coming down on you. I promise it is not.
 

get2choppaaa

Ostrich
Well there you go. I don't mean to be cold in this difficult time, but the story always ends the same when childless marriages are involved.
I don't think kids would have changed this outcome. I think OP dodged a bullet. She sounds like a user and someone with cultural differences.

I've dated Eastern European women like this, and he was just a meal ticket until she wanted to go to a new restaurant.
 

Cervantes

Woodpecker
Woman
As for losing your job, it won't help unless you are declared officially disabled. Your income will be imputed (estimated) based on your most recent work history or government statistics of wages in your industry.
Technically you are correct - they will impute income because they don't want men dodging the financial yoke that is planned for them - particularly if you have children.

But practically speaking - neither the lawyers or the judge want an outcome where the man appears to crack and be unable to meet the obligations. If you appear to be impulsive, emotionally fragile, having a hard time holding down a job they will look for ways to make it easier on you to avoid a catastrophic failure.

In my experience when a guy shows up in court looking like a solid stand up citizen they load him up to the absolute max because they know a guy like that will bear almost anything to stay within the system.

When you look like an impulsive less controllable guy they try to work with you more. I've seen it so many times where a guy with a criminal record who appears less invested in his family and looks like he might actually completely skip out on paying child support is treated way more carefully and gently than the solid citizen type.

You're better off looking to them like the less controllable type or someone who looks less invested in the system.
 
One of the most difficult and hardest things to understand for us men is the women's ability to leave a long-term relationship, without a trace, just like that.
Leaving everything behind, with a smile on the face, like all was nothing.
It is a devastating revelation for us.

But instead of being devastated, we should learn this ability from them.
They aren't wasting endless nights in sorrow about the past.

And we can do the same. Not to change himself to a heartless creature without remorse, but we can choose to continue living again.
Falling into dirt doesn't mean you have to be dirty for the rest of your life.
Don't let anyone drag you to the bottom and if you find yourself in the bottom pit, move up instantly.

You don't have unlimited time on this earth.
Being pissed off is much better than foggy depression.


A woman's love is seldom permanent and rarely genuine.

They are here today and gone tomorrow even when they say it will be forever.

They want endless commitment from a man in regards to access to his resources even after the relationship is over and they have moved on and give their body to another man.


Personally I would get her deported, but that is just me. I would denounce her and claim she lied on on her visa application and lied during the green card interview, that is if she lied.

I would find some legal and valid means by which to get her deported.
 

Cervantes

Woodpecker
Woman
I don't agree with your comments about the divorce lawyer. Have you been divorced? Did you get screwed by your lawyer or something?

if you have assets get a good lawyer and don't let her screw you over. Since no kids you should be fine with parting with some stuff.
Your own lawyer will pursue your interests only to the extent that they don't conflict with the interests of the system.

For example, your own lawyer will never fight for the father to get primary custody, even when that is best for the children because that goes against the interests of the system - to ensure that there is a financial transfer from the man to the woman.

If your goal is more access to your children your best bet is to give the court what it really desires: making you pay child support and doing that in exchange for access to children. That is you agree immediately to pay the max support if they give you maximum access to your children, a deal the court will readily accept because you meet their primary goal without a fight and they ultimately don't care where the children go. If you try to go for custody AND support, they will do whatever possible to make sure you don't get custody because your attempt to get custody in that case would go against their desired outcome.

Every lawyer will fight hard for women to get primary custody AND support. The same lawyer will convince their male clients to pay support and give up custody - regardless of circumstances. Because this is the desired range of outcomes that the court wants. What is actually better for your children is not a concern.
 

get2choppaaa

Ostrich
Technically you are correct - they will impute income because they don't want men dodging the financial yoke that is planned for them - particularly if you have children.

But practically speaking - neither the lawyers or the judge want an outcome where the man appears to crack and be unable to meet the obligations. If you appear to be impulsive, emotionally fragile, having a hard time holding down a job they will look for ways to make it easier on you to avoid a catastrophic failure.

In my experience when a guy shows up in court looking like a solid stand up citizen they load him up to the absolute max because they know a guy like that will bear almost anything to stay within the system.

When you look like an impulsive less controllable guy they try to work with you more. I've seen it so many times where a guy with a criminal record who appears less invested in his family and looks like he might actually completely skip out on paying child support is treated way more carefully and gently than the solid citizen type.

You're better off looking to them like the less controllable type or someone who looks less invested in the system.
I can give a little personal color (have a family member who is a family law attny) and having been divorced. A lot of it has to do with your judge and court room. This is like 95% of it.

The judge is going to look at this like a business dissolution not a marriage. You should too.

In OP's case, providing he isn't in California or a state where spousal support is required even in absence of children.... this info doesn't really apply. It might work for some situations... but I dont advise ANY of the above.

At worst you are looking at losing half your stuff....having a mid life breakdown and crisis will only hurt your ascent back to the top.

In mediation they will settle everything as far as who gets what.
since no kids there wont be child support so its really "which assets do you keep and which does she keep"

Get a good lawyer, understand that this ordeal costs money.

If she has already taken stuff out of her house, then its going to be hard for her to go after all the stuff still there.... so its going to be what assets do you have that are easily able to be split. FOR INSTANCE: 401k/retirement/pension ect... So
 
Your own lawyer will pursue your interests only to the extent that they don't conflict with the interests of the system.

For example, your own lawyer will never fight for the father to get primary custody, even when that is best for the children because that goes against the interests of the system - to ensure that there is a financial transfer from the man to the woman.

If your goal is more access to your children your best bet is to give the court what it really desires: making you pay child support and doing that in exchange for access to children. That is you agree immediately to pay the max support if they give you maximum access to your children, a deal the court will readily accept because you meet their primary goal without a fight and they ultimately don't care where the children go. If you try to go for custody AND support, they will do whatever possible to make sure you don't get custody because your attempt to get custody in that case would go against their desired outcome.

Every lawyer will fight hard for women to get primary custody AND support. The same lawyer will convince their male clients to pay support and give up custody - regardless of circumstances. Because this is the desired range of outcomes that the court wants. What is actually better for your children is not a concern.


Disagree completely. My father was represented [by a female lawyer] and wound up with sole physical and legal custody of me, my mother's visitation rights were terminated, and my mother had to pay child support and the ruling was rendered by a female judge.


A marriage of less than 7 years, where he supported her in the pursuit of her degree, depending on the state laws he may have a claim on half of the value of the degree or professional license, at least for a period of time.

I have seen cases where men put their wives through law school, paid for it all, the woman filed for divorce, and the man was able to get an order for half of the value of her law degree for 10-20 years. It happens.

When you prime somebody with "the entire deck is stacked against you, even your own attorney will destroy you, abandon all hope, it is hopeless and over" what sort of impact do you think it is going to have on them?
 

get2choppaaa

Ostrich
Your own lawyer will pursue your interests only to the extent that they don't conflict with the interests of the system.

For example, your own lawyer will never fight for the father to get primary custody, even when that is best for the children because that goes against the interests of the system - to ensure that there is a financial transfer from the man to the woman.

If your goal is more access to your children your best bet is to give the court what it really desires: making you pay child support and doing that in exchange for access to children. That is you agree immediately to pay the max support if they give you maximum access to your children, a deal the court will readily accept because you meet their primary goal without a fight and they ultimately don't care where the children go. If you try to go for custody AND support, they will do whatever possible to make sure you don't get custody because your attempt to get custody in that case would go against their desired outcome.

Every lawyer will fight hard for women to get primary custody AND support. The same lawyer will convince their male clients to pay support and give up custody - regardless of circumstances. Because this is the desired range of outcomes that the court wants. What is actually better for your children is not a concern.
Lawyers/Judges default to Standard Divorce agreements.

Technically possession/access and child support are not the same. My wife cant deny access to her ex husband just because he is 10k behind in child support and did the exact sort of thing you are suggesting.....even though he is about to be criminally prosecuted for avoiding paying his child support. Not that it will matter once he goes to jail... which the do indeed send people in jail for once they are found in contempt of the court order.

If you have a good amount of assets then YOU can get a GOOD lawyer who knows the judge/system ect and will fight for your case.

I am in the middle of a custody battle now. My lawyers firm is one of the top in the city. They flip custody all the time. It just costs money.
 
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get2choppaaa

Ostrich
Disagree completely. My father was represented [by a female lawyer] and wound up with sole physical and legal custody of me, my mother's visitation rights were terminated, and my mother had to pay child support and the ruling was rendered by a female judge.


A marriage of less than 7 years, where he supported her in the pursuit of her degree, depending on the state laws he may have a claim on half of the value of the degree or professional license, at least for a period of time.

I have seen cases where men put their wives through law school, paid for it all, the woman filed for divorce, and the man was able to get an order for half of the value of her law degree for 10-20 years. It happens.

When you prime somebody with "the entire deck is stacked against you, even your own attorney will destroy you, abandon all hope, it is hopeless and over" what sort of impact do you think it is going to have on them?
Exactly. correct.

There is zero reason to make someone jaded. especially considering the fact that so many cases are judge/courtroom dependent if you go extrajudicial to standard orders. I would take an offensive approach and have your lawyer show the court how much you did to support this woman and why she should COMPENSATE YOU after all the material/emotional support YOU provided HER. (caps for emphasis)
 

JohnQThomas

Woodpecker
Cant believe I'm even posting this, thought about it for few days and thought maybe this could help someone else going through similar situation. Its very unfortunate for me to announce but I will be getting a divorce after 7 years married and 9 years together. Its all still a sureal shock to me and I never expected it. Sure we had problems here and there but did not think one day shed be gone.

How it happened was she left on a Sunday , that Saturday the day before , we had a fanastic day of activities and spent it together. Even made love that night, woke up on Sunday she had a backpack on and said she was going for a walk..and never came back. Left me a note saying our world views are different and she was unhappy and thinks we can still be happy. She left every single belonging here from all her clothes to even her car , everything.

After the first intial shock she reached back out said shes just in dark place and I asked her if we can work it out and got her to say shell see where it goes.

It never went anywhere, she never tried and her therapist that she made me start seeing under the pretext of saving the marriage was just so this therapist can put me down for her. Now it over after 4 months of playing this game and eating my skin daily.

Little background story of how we met, she is from Russia and was here on student visa and met her at coffee shop. She worked there and we seemed to have really hit it off. To others we looked like a dream couple that others should take example of. She doesnt have a single relative or real friend here and being Armenian my family already knew how to speak Russian. It was very easy for them to get along

My family has accepted her and given her everything this whole time. After everything we done for her it's just insane to end a marriage based on being unhappy when nothing happened between us to trigger it.

Theres many Red flags that i dont know what to even think, the fact that she waited to beggining of Jan makes it 7 years married , she became a us citizen because of me.

Lastly the last bit of update is as we kept talking for 3 months trying to work it out, meet for dinners go to therapy sessions. One day she told me she needs to grab a few things, I asked her if shes made her desicion she said no just need to get some things. She said shed come at 11 and I happen to get home at noon. I didnt see her car so thought she was done, or didnt come. I go to my floor in my building elevator opens and its her with the whole hallway covered with all her crap and her girlfriend was there helping her. They both just stared at me and i didnt say anything. She always said she wasnt materlistic person but She took every item thats hers out of here. Including all the jewelry my family has gotten her over the years.

I have no idea who this person is anymore and now question if this whole thing from start was a setup to get the papers and take everything from me. Russian woman are ice cold and are heartless.

My family is devasted as they treated her as their daughter. I suspect alot of where it went down was we saw the phony roni in complete opposite ways. She double muzzled all year and was constantly terrified of it and would rather believe that leprachaun Faucci over her own husband.

I helped her family out alot , sending them money in Russia, talking to her parents least once a week for an hour , did that our whole marriage. Ever since she left her parents have never reached back to me again.

She says she is unhappy and wants to seek happiness while shes still young. I dont get how she will find happiness when she has no friends or relatives or anyone here. My family was everything for her and it seemed as if she was really thankful for them and loved spending time together with them . Then one day she could just turn all that off and have no feelings.

My father warned me when getting married to her that her parents went through a divorce and that its in her family and there is a high chance she will one day do it as well. I remember thinking at the time how unnecessary it was for him to tell me that but it all makes sense now

Most the advice I have gotten from my guy friends is that I should sleep with all these woman. Thats the last thing that I want to do . This has messed me up pretty badly and just wanted to write this in a way to vent but in another way maybe help someone get perspective maybe they are going through the same thing. Sorry for the random rambling guys , hope the roni has not destroyed your guys relationships. Just wanted to get it off my chest and talk to you guys about it . Roosh mentioned in one of his recent Roosh hours that Russian Ukrainian women its in their nature to do these kind of things and how they have no soul and are heartless, I just did not want to believe at the time that I was with one of them.
It ain’t the Roni; it’s the Rooski.

Sorry to hear that you’ve been played by the East European Green Card Scam. (Thought you had found a unicorn, did you? Thought women from that part of the world were “different”, did you?)

Don’t feel too bad; better and wiser men have fallen for this.

Best wishes for your emotional and financial recovery.
 

berserker2001

Robin
Orthodox
Dang brother, that was a powerful story and appreciate the openness- I am positive that will help many other young men make positive decisions in their lives. Out of darkness comes light, and may the good Lord shine a light onto your path and bestow many opportunities towards you. On the bright side, you are master of your domain and there are no problems or solutions in life- only trade-off's. To everything there is a season and now you are ready for a new exciting chapter. Godspeed!
 
Personally I would get her deported, but that is just me. I would denounce her and claim she lied on on her visa application and lied during the green card interview, that is if she lied.

I would find some legal and valid means by which to get her deported.

Absolutely agree.

OP, you spent 9 years with this woman, who now treats you like yesterday's trash. I would not advise doing this if you had an amicable split. But the way she acted against you, a loyal, her best friend, of 9 years, deserves you to retract your very generous favor you did to her by allowing her to become an US citizen.

Time for her to go back to Chelyabinsk and enjoy some russian reality.
 

get2choppaaa

Ostrich
Absolutely agree.

OP, you spent 9 years with this woman, who now treats you like yesterday's trash. I would not advise doing this if you had an amicable split. But the way she acted against you, a loyal, her best friend, of 9 years, deserves you to retract your very generous favor you did to her by allowing her to become an US citizen.

Time for her to go back to Chelyabinsk and enjoy some russian reality.
Like i said. I would find a lawyer who will go raging bull A hole and schorch earth.... you'll be better protected legally that way... TRUST ME.

Dont live with anger/hatred about it, but recognize you got used and abused. Once you get through the grief of the death of the relationship, the righteous indignation will take over. I dont know how suceptible you are to your own passions, but for me over-indulging in anger is always my sin. I still struggle with it when I interact with my ex-wife and her mother, who is generally one of the top 5 worst people on the planet.

But anyway, Right now you need to get a good lawyer and be prepared that this will get nasty, not because you want to be nasty, but because thats what happens in a divorce. Most Women have to find a reason to make you the bad guy and lie about it to avoid guilt.
 
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