Dittos on the compliments to the great article.
On virgin men:
At the risk of sounding contrarian, I think that a sub-set of men that will have it difficult are those men that happen to be virgins or "near" virgins. I'm sure someone with a "doctor's brain" will say - you either are a virgin or you are not. Sure, but what I'm describing is that particular guy that has had two (2) clumsy sexual experiences / Non-experiences with women while his marriage prospect - well, she has had 18 or so partners. I suppose the great aforementioned article is written to warn or contain the expectations of previously promiscuous guy(s).
Well, not every guy is/was a man-whore. The articles is great in that it generalizes with "most men", etc.
Back to this hypothetical marriage prospect that had 18 partners, lets say because we know it's true in many instance, she was proposed marriage at least once, very seriously. Another relationship was five (5) years; while she carried on other simultaneous relationships. As we know, women, they are known to have had 12 to 15 sex partners in the span of 1.5 years; most guys are not that disgusting. How many, for all intents and purposes, "honeymoons" did she have? How much romance was given?
Some forum members (religious guys, I suppose) have mentioned the idea of predestination in what woman you will be given. If this were so exact then, I imagine, no married couple would argue such topics about his/her past and life on earth in marriage would be very uncontentious outside of choosing which restaurant is best or, say, work or clothing. Also, as we've seen there have been articles written on the preacher that married the ex-porn star.
Now, to the difficult parts of this topic. Lately in the manosphere, I've seen some riveting meme's on women and the nature of women when it comes to marriage and mgtow, dating, etc. I can't share them here, they are both hilarious and stomach-churning or nauseating. Plus, to think of how clueless men are, in general, about the nature of women. There are red-pilled men out there that don't know the half of it. It's not until they live another decade that it dawns upon them what actually happened at age 24 or 28.
To illustrate this, when I was in my mid-twenties I participated in a summer internship. I was one of the older students. The bulk of the cohort was juniors and seniors in college, I was a graduate student. Well, there was this 'over-achieving', freshman Hispanic, let's call her M, because that is her real initial. I worked in the same building as she - there also was another student T, she worked there too. For M, toward the end of that internship, she became very comfortable with four (4) guys from a "guy's apartment" in the same housing building; she basically spent the last 2 weeks with them. The actual time that she was with them, I think everyone understands the meaning here, could have been a little more than 2 weeks.
So on the last couple of days of this summer internship, I learned that M was "sick". She led everyone to believe that she was sick. There I was talking to T, the other student that was a good girl friend to M. I told T:
"yes, M, she is sick that is why she is not at work"
I distinctly recall T giving me a looked as if I was a clue-less Blue Pilled Beta (I didn't even know what that meant at the time), which was mostly true. Either I was a blue-pilled beta or a determined blue-pilled alpha improving my lot by going to graduate school. But the point is ... T had a clear picture. Twenty years later and T still knows that M was being a whore while lying to her supervisor and everyone else.
So here T is with an understanding that M was not sick, but rather in an apartment with 2 to 4 guys getting drunk mid-day and having "honeymoons". Lol
You can't make this insanity up.
Now, get this -- if that wasn't enough -- two things. I saw M after that internship, a year or so later. I had a GF at the time who became my wife, but M, she, was shaming me because her "husband/non-husband" cheated on her. She gave me a steely gaze, or she glared at me, saying "All men cheat." I may have grinned and thought or said:
"ok, maybe some do"
It turns out that M had a High School sweetheart that she began the marriage process with; after said internship (he very well may have been a Virgin). They married at a resort in a foreign country. But when they returned to the States, they didn't go to the court house to settle the marriage because it turned out that he had someone else - another woman. Lol, sad but true.
Q: I can't help but wonder - did the revelation that she had such a warped view of sex, that she in fact spent more than one week with 4 guys - help to destroy the marriage before it could launch?
Who knows, it may have been shared or learned - and he may not have been able to bear it.
Earlier, about M, I said she was overachieving - no pun intended.
Some men would say Schadenfreude, schadenfreude to M.
I ... I ... well, let's just say that I reserve my brain power, or try my best to do so, for different needs - not joy or pleasure in someone's misfortunes - but recall she brought it upon herself. I simply wish there existed eye bleach, brain bleach, you get the point.
Although, I must say that I was mighty ticked off that T didn't believe me when I spoke, unknowingly, a lie. I was fed a lie. See there, most men care about integrity and honesty, loyalty -- arguably, most women, not of Faith, care about self gain, self pleasure, attention and lust.
So a question that arises, that is harsh and a question that I truly don't wish to ask or even write, may God in Heaven not judge me harshly for being too conscientious.
It's rhetorical.
Do some women deserve no romance? After all, they've had plenty.
So painful to write that ... women will be married and romance will be given but with or for some men -- it won't arrive without them - the guys - being ponderous.
Him to her:
Now, what was that, what did you experience? How many marriage proposals did you walk away from? How many dates were you taken on? How many over-lapping sexual relationships did you have?
The back and forth about this topic will continue on this forum, for sure, with titles like these from the spring and summer, they will simply be re-worded or questioned from a different angle:
How much does/should her sexual history matter?
Using Christ to overcome the sexual past of a potential wife
Finding nicer/happier women
One last thing about romance, it is over-rated to a degree but it's a woman's measure of her relationship however mature a woman should be - even after a failed marriage and 6 kids - they'll enjoy crying over their own broken hearts.
However, forgetting about all of that, as Jordan Peterson says, romance is for the beginning of a relationship, it for getting together to then have children.
For what it's worth ...
Cheers
John 3:16
