Finding a Husband during Corona

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
Hey, that's a great question. I've been having similar thoughts recently. I always imagined I would meet someone 'organically' e.g. at Church, through friends etc... but as I consider the next couple of years (and the fact that I'm stuck abroad due to work and lockdowns!), I'm beginning to ponder whether I need to put my ego aside and start intentionally dating online but with men from my home country! My main worry with this is the lack of reference points for vetting purposes that you would normally have from meeting someone within your wider circle. I suppose at the end of the day it really depends on your lockdown situation and network/community. I know that I don't know anyone offline who is likeminded in regard to the whole lockdown scam, so I definitely understand if that's your situation. In this case, maybe let's join in prayer. There's nothing preventing God from putting your future husband in your path, lockdown and all! Wishing you all the best and I look forward to seeing what other people have to say!
I tried online dating before and after covid. For 2 different people. It was like Roosh said in his book Lady, they are not who they say they are, become lazy about perusing social groups and community groups, and those are just another type of man only perusing you know what. Not in the settle down stage. Sorry to say these 2 men were not husband material.
 

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
I think most people get married within some kind of social group. I'd let it be known to friends, friends of friends, relatives etc. (the ones you like/trust) that you are looking and available. You'd be surprised how many people probably know of someone through a pipeline.
I like idea of asking friends and family for help.
I moved around a lot as a kid due to my parents working for the Army. Therefore, I unfortunately never had a social group.
I've been asking acquaintances at work who I know think like us in this forum if they know somebody ready to find a wife (especially a lady that wants to be a stay-at-home Mom). lol They think it's funny. I don't mind asking though. After all family is something I greatly desire.
But in these cases they don't have much of a social network outside of their immediate family. Our society has been very atomized...even before covid. I will of course keep trying.
 

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
This is bordering on promotion of lust and immodesty.
Oh is it?
When my squadron does PT we always do dynamic stretching before a workout and static stretching after a workout. If stretching isn't conducted, there is an increased risk of injury.
Maybe it's just that I've grown up doing sports all my life so an active lifestyle is normal to me. Is there something about stretching that I'm not seeing?
 

Rob Banks

Pelican
Oh is it?
When my squadron does PT we always do dynamic stretching before a workout and static stretching after a workout. If stretching isn't conducted, there is an increased risk of injury.
Maybe it's just that I've grown up doing sports all my life so an active lifestyle is normal to me. Is there something about stretching that I'm not seeing?
You specifically mentioned men approaching women to flirt with them while they are stretching at the gym (a place where women are known to dress revealingly).
 

stugatz

Pelican
It seems like people struggle as to how to interact w/ other people in a gym environment (let alone potential suiters). The headphone wearing is a real bearer. I can't engage in small chi-chat if they wear those. I'm really good at small talk but even I wonder what I should say in this environment. I actually saw some really bad advice on an "eHow" video on how to flirt at the gym. They were telling guys not to talk to girls while their stretching... I think that's the best time.
I have pulled this off but the woman has to 1) not have headphones on and 2) not have one of those zoned out default gym expressions on. (You know, the “I’m working out and need to focus” look.)

It’s usually not rocket science though...if a girl is open to a few minutes of conversation it’s not all that hard to figure out.
 

Pelern

Sparrow
You specifically mentioned men approaching women to flirt with them while they are stretching at the gym (a place where women are known to dress revealingly).
I haven't noticed a difference between what women wear at the gym and what they usually wear when they are out in public.

Granted I haven't been to the gym in a year and I exercise at home but I can't imagine it has changed much in that time.
 

Rob Banks

Pelican
I haven't noticed a difference between what women wear at the gym and what they usually wear when they are out in public.

Granted I haven't been to the gym in a year and I exercise at home but I can't imagine it has changed much in that time.
Yes, but women typically aren't doing the same type of athletic stretching on the street as they are at the gym.

Immodest dress + stretching + flirting = not a good situation (especially if we are talking about "finding a good husband").
 

KC123

Pigeon
Woman
I tried online dating before and after covid. For 2 different people. It was like Roosh said in his book Lady, they are not who they say they are, become lazy about perusing social groups and community groups, and those are just another type of man only perusing you know what. Not in the settle down stage. Sorry to say these 2 men were not husband material.
Yep, unfortunately that does seem to add up. I guess that just means I have 1 more year to focus on growing in my faith before I'm able to begin actively searching for someone!
 

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
Yep, unfortunately that does seem to add up. I guess that just means I have 1 more year to focus on growing in my faith before I'm able to begin actively searching for someone!
I think that you can find someone now if you look for them. It might not be the best move to postpone the search for a spouse after covid. Just b/c there is no end in sight or rather it's restrictions. The gov doesn't want to give up this control they have over us. They want the commoners to keep postponing their lives until it's too late for them (i.e. reproduce, marriage, visit family, etc).
 

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
Yes, but women typically aren't doing the same type of athletic stretching on the street as they are at the gym.

Immodest dress + stretching + flirting = not a good situation (especially if we are talking about "finding a good husband").
What is modest dress for women at the gym? For me, if I'm not in Air force PT gear, I wear a sport t-shirt and leggings.
 

Ah_Tibor

Robin
Woman
I like idea of asking friends and family for help.
I moved around a lot as a kid due to my parents working for the Army. Therefore, I unfortunately never had a social group.
I hear ya. I was homeschooled so my social circle wasn't extremely wide, and the dating pool at community college was... not good. My brother and sister-in-law were friends from summer camp, so I've known her since I was seven, and my husband and I met at age 8, then again at 17/18 at a diocesan winter retreat, then again in our 20s. I also crashed his sister's wedding (I went to the church ceremony just to say hi/congrats and they let me stay because there were empty spots at the reception) and we sort of ended up as each other's defacto date for the night, LOL.
 

KC123

Pigeon
Woman
I think that you can find someone now if you look for them. It might not be the best move to postpone the search for a spouse after covid. Just b/c there is no end in sight or rather it's restrictions. The gov doesn't want to give up this control they have over us. They want the commoners to keep postponing their lives until it's too late for them (i.e. reproduce, marriage, visit family, etc).
I completely agree with you but my main reason for postponing is that I'm stuck abroad and I definitely don't ever plan on settling down here so there's no point in wasting anyone's time. Otherwise I'd definitely be out there looking. I've given myself til the end of the year to get home anyways so not delaying it past that.
 

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
I haven't noticed a difference between what women wear at the gym and what they usually wear when they are out in public.

Granted I haven't been to the gym in a year and I exercise at home but I can't imagine it has changed much in that time.
I think somewhere along the lines leggings or skinny jeans became the new blue jeans. Since reading this I noticed it at a church yesterday evening.
 

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
Perhaps you could move to or travel to a nearby area where there are less restrictions. The whole country isn’t under this bogus lockdown. There are still places where life is somewhat normal. If you cannot do that I would recommend trying to find and form connections with like minded people, especially anti lockdown/mask/vaccine people and groups because I guarantee you those are the people living their life as normal human beings and your bound to find a good, God fearing man who isn’t drinking the covid kool-aid in one of those groups.
I do live in the mid-west. I do have some acquaintances at work that I've asked to basically be on the look out for me. I specifically mention husband. Not boyfriend. lol That entails dating for an indeterminant amount of time. But they usually don't have much of a social circle either. Like when they go home to their family, that's their social circle. That's it. They no longer need to look b/c they've made it. We're very atomized these days. It makes the possibility of a future family so hard.

I remember hearing that at some pt in time churches made it a pt to match people up for the possibility for marriage. Do churches do this today? The Catholic chapel I go to is at a university doesn't seem to do this. idk I am new to my faith. I'm not sure if this is an accurate representation for someone like myself who is so new or that was something they did yesteryear.
 

OutlawJustice

Sparrow
Woman
I completely agree with you but my main reason for postponing is that I'm stuck abroad and I definitely don't ever plan on settling down here so there's no point in wasting anyone's time. Otherwise I'd definitely be out there looking. I've given myself til the end of the year to get home anyways so not delaying it past that.
I'm curious are you there for work, backpacking, etc? Maybe there's a way to get back home quicker.
 

KC123

Pigeon
Woman
I'm curious are you there for work, backpacking, etc? Maybe there's a way to get back home quicker.
I'm here for work. My contract ends at the end of 2022 but the caveat was that during it I could get home frequently, and at the end possibly a transfer to the USA as that is where I would have liked to settle down (I'm like you in that we moved around a lot growing up due to parent's work so I don't really have a homebase so by 'home' I mean where most of my family currently resides). But now with the world the way it is, I don't know if I'd like to transfer to the US as a single woman and risk not getting home for prolonged periods of time. As such, I'm working on setting up an online business so that I can move back home this year instead of next and at least have the security of having my family close by.
 

KC123

Pigeon
Woman
I'm curious are you there for work, backpacking, etc? Maybe there's a way to get back home quicker.
Oh and also! I only really came back to my faith over this past year due to everything that's happening, so when I moved here I genuinely didn't even consider the whole husband/kids aspect of things. I NEVER thought I'd ever desire to be a stay at home mum, and was pretty happy with this career development. But alas - the last year was a major eye-opener for me, and I really grew in my faith with Jesus and now all I want is a good Christian man and 6 kids on a homestead. Ha! It's almost comical because since I made this decision I've been getting offers that other colleagues would die for in terms of career advancement and I'm like 'nah' - gonna use my evenings to learn about raising a godly family :p
 

Zanardi

Woodpecker
I've never been more grateful to already have a husband than since this whole PLANdemic kicked off.

That being said, I have noticed current circumstances have the effect of separating the wheat from the chaff a bit. You might see a tall, objectively handsome, masculine looking man in the checkout lane... except he doesn't take his mask off as he exits the store, and instead keeps wearing it as he dodges around the scary unmasked people in the parking lot, gets into his car and drives away, still wearing the stupid mask... BOOM, DISQUALIFIED.

Anyone who is actually worried about meeting in person because they're afraid of catching "COVID" - DISQUALIFIED.

Anyone who gets the vaccine - DISQUALIFIED.

Learn to sniff out fear. Don't go anywhere near the men who reek of it.

Even and especially if you yourself still entertain or harbor the notion that this is a real pandemic instead of the globalist scam that it is. The last thing ANY woman needs is a man who makes decisions based on fear and the desire for safety and security. That's feminine behavior.

According to this, I'll be DQed because of taking the vaccine. Not because of fear, but mostly because of caution. As a lecturer, I encounter many students and colleagues daily and I don't entertain the idea of being ill. I am taking flu shots for more than 10 years.

In the rest, I wear masks only inside but almost never outside. I even had a discussion or two with the police force because of not wearing the mask outdoors. Polite discussions, in which I stood up my case and in which I was let go freely. My girlfriend was a bit freaked out when I told her this, but now she got used to it.

I didn't actively avoid meeting anybody in person, but I used the last months to work on a few books for school, to do calisthenics, to learn to cook arroz mexicano and to learn Dutch (these being the most important things). I didn't miss people much, one or two meetings per week (excluding those with my better half) were more than enough.

But yeah, I feel ya. You have a solid point with your post.
 
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