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Finding a Religious Wife - Discussion
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<blockquote data-quote="MichaelWitcoff" data-source="post: 1263673" data-attributes="member: 16038"><p>The real answer, and the one that many don't want to hear, is that marriage isn't for everyone and just because you want a wife doesn't mean it's the path for you. St. Paul specifically says he would prefer if everyone could be celibate like he is, but makes the concession that if you can't control your lust, then it's better to have sex within a marriage than to be a fornicator or adulterer. He further writes that if you're unmarried when you devote your life to God, you should not seek a wife but remain as you are. </p><p></p><p>He gives the same exhortation to women as he does to men - basically "whatever you are, stay that way." This is one of the many passages of the Scriptures that Protestants like to pretend doesn't exist, because the culture of their churches tends to be very marriage-and-family focused and they have absolutely zero emphasis on monasticism / asceticism. In fact they have zero monasticism, period, and would probably even argue that it's wrong or bad somehow. </p><p></p><p>All this stuff about "but the monkeys do this or that" is just a rationalization to be enslaved to one's basest instincts without putting the work in to overcome the animal in us to become fully human (or at least, MORE fully human). It's an anti-civilization argument, since as Freud said (and forgive me for quoting him), "It is impossible to overestimate the degree to which civilization is built on the renunciation of instinct." And there's an irony in "polyamorous / PUA guys" who whine that women's destructive instincts are tearing our society apart, when they're engaging in the exact same behavior. </p><p></p><p>To make a long story short, a spouse and family is in God's plan for some people and not for others. If you really put your trust in God to lead you down the path that's best for you, give up your own design and humbly say "Thy will be done." Whether His will for you is marriage or consecrated celibacy, it will benefit you far more in the long run - literally for eternity - to give up your own desires to the greatest extent that you're capable of doing so, and put your life in His hands instead. I know people don't want to hear this answer, but read the Scriptures and Church Fathers and you will see that it's the one most in line with ancient Christian thinking. Cheers</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="MichaelWitcoff, post: 1263673, member: 16038"] The real answer, and the one that many don't want to hear, is that marriage isn't for everyone and just because you want a wife doesn't mean it's the path for you. St. Paul specifically says he would prefer if everyone could be celibate like he is, but makes the concession that if you can't control your lust, then it's better to have sex within a marriage than to be a fornicator or adulterer. He further writes that if you're unmarried when you devote your life to God, you should not seek a wife but remain as you are. He gives the same exhortation to women as he does to men - basically "whatever you are, stay that way." This is one of the many passages of the Scriptures that Protestants like to pretend doesn't exist, because the culture of their churches tends to be very marriage-and-family focused and they have absolutely zero emphasis on monasticism / asceticism. In fact they have zero monasticism, period, and would probably even argue that it's wrong or bad somehow. All this stuff about "but the monkeys do this or that" is just a rationalization to be enslaved to one's basest instincts without putting the work in to overcome the animal in us to become fully human (or at least, MORE fully human). It's an anti-civilization argument, since as Freud said (and forgive me for quoting him), "It is impossible to overestimate the degree to which civilization is built on the renunciation of instinct." And there's an irony in "polyamorous / PUA guys" who whine that women's destructive instincts are tearing our society apart, when they're engaging in the exact same behavior. To make a long story short, a spouse and family is in God's plan for some people and not for others. If you really put your trust in God to lead you down the path that's best for you, give up your own design and humbly say "Thy will be done." Whether His will for you is marriage or consecrated celibacy, it will benefit you far more in the long run - literally for eternity - to give up your own desires to the greatest extent that you're capable of doing so, and put your life in His hands instead. I know people don't want to hear this answer, but read the Scriptures and Church Fathers and you will see that it's the one most in line with ancient Christian thinking. Cheers [/QUOTE]
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