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Heartbroken and need some advice
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<blockquote data-quote="Nate_Drake" data-source="post: 1508187" data-attributes="member: 20533"><p>Man </p><p>Man, I'm not the dude who is a master approach guy. It never resonated with me since whatever i might come up with to say to a chick has nothing to do with her(Assuming we don't know each other). Unless we have some common social connection, then we MIGHT have something to talk about that would be semi sincere. If you manage to get her chatting, she's probably going to expect you to move fast and if that's your thing then that's up to you. I feel like the modern woman wants you to seduce her Into bed rather than give you two two the opportunity to get to know each other slowly. I dabbled with pua but it never sat well with me and was only successful if i had been drinking. I also tried to join co Ed sports and other communal events which had some positive impact. Obviously sometimes you're going to feel some vibes and that's different--some kind of chemistry, then go for it. That said, you gotta take action if you feel the need, not sit on the sidelines of life so i don't have a perfect answer.</p><p></p><p>This is an untested theory but I'll go ahead and tell it to you. As a man trying to find some balance in his life and not be eternally alone i have always thought the top priority should be in forming a tribe with other like minded men. If you can find loyal dudes around who got your back and are willing to help you(in anything) without aggressively trying to compete, you might have better odds at whatever you attempt to acheive. The tendency of men is to forget the age old adage, bros before the ladies. I think it's American culture. They don't want you in that speakeasy figuring everything out now do they? If you have a tribe, they'll keep you positive when you're down. They hold you accountable and they'll help you when they can, thereby reducing your stress and improving your opportunities in life. That should be very attractive to women, to employers, and to anyone you meet. How to form a tribe in today's day in age? That's the primary problem to solve. For sure, it matters where you reside. If you're not proximal to the type of people you want to associate with, then that's job#1. To tie everything back though, it's the resignation to eternal loneliness that i believe is the key. Everything else is icing on the cake. if you look at women or a woman as the reward for this life i believe that's the wrong path. As a struggling Christian, many of us may end up alone. We may marry miss perfect and she may die tragically. Christianity with a dose of stoicism is my way of dealing with this reality.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nate_Drake, post: 1508187, member: 20533"] Man Man, I'm not the dude who is a master approach guy. It never resonated with me since whatever i might come up with to say to a chick has nothing to do with her(Assuming we don't know each other). Unless we have some common social connection, then we MIGHT have something to talk about that would be semi sincere. If you manage to get her chatting, she's probably going to expect you to move fast and if that's your thing then that's up to you. I feel like the modern woman wants you to seduce her Into bed rather than give you two two the opportunity to get to know each other slowly. I dabbled with pua but it never sat well with me and was only successful if i had been drinking. I also tried to join co Ed sports and other communal events which had some positive impact. Obviously sometimes you're going to feel some vibes and that's different--some kind of chemistry, then go for it. That said, you gotta take action if you feel the need, not sit on the sidelines of life so i don't have a perfect answer. This is an untested theory but I'll go ahead and tell it to you. As a man trying to find some balance in his life and not be eternally alone i have always thought the top priority should be in forming a tribe with other like minded men. If you can find loyal dudes around who got your back and are willing to help you(in anything) without aggressively trying to compete, you might have better odds at whatever you attempt to acheive. The tendency of men is to forget the age old adage, bros before the ladies. I think it's American culture. They don't want you in that speakeasy figuring everything out now do they? If you have a tribe, they'll keep you positive when you're down. They hold you accountable and they'll help you when they can, thereby reducing your stress and improving your opportunities in life. That should be very attractive to women, to employers, and to anyone you meet. How to form a tribe in today's day in age? That's the primary problem to solve. For sure, it matters where you reside. If you're not proximal to the type of people you want to associate with, then that's job#1. To tie everything back though, it's the resignation to eternal loneliness that i believe is the key. Everything else is icing on the cake. if you look at women or a woman as the reward for this life i believe that's the wrong path. As a struggling Christian, many of us may end up alone. We may marry miss perfect and she may die tragically. Christianity with a dose of stoicism is my way of dealing with this reality. [/QUOTE]
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