Hesitant about revealing conversion to mother

[Anomaly]

Perhaps some of you can relate to this. I was baptized in April of this year and went through eight months of RCIA to convert to Catholicism.

I attend an SSPX chapel. As I’ve said elsewhere I’m an ethnic Jew who was atheistic for my early all my life up until three years ago. I married a white, Catholic woman and my two children were baptized. She knows we attend church. She has no problems with this.

My mother was driven up a wall in life. My negligent father and brother with a history of criminality and alcoholism and having to raise both of us by herself were enormous burdens. I can write at length about it, but the memories are painful and doing so is unnecessary for this post.

I do not want her to suffer any further in old age, but it feels like I’m living a lie.

Have any of you going through something similar?

 

[Palestrina]

If your mother doesn't have a problem with you attending Church, and your two children being baptized, then she may not be as upset about the conversion as is thought. If the subject is brought up with her with the utmost kindness and assurance of the continuation of your love for her, then what more can be done?

What does your wife think? She may have some good ideas on how to approach the situation. You are very fortunate to have a Catholic wife. What does your SSPX priest think? Have you approached him for his advice in this matter? If not, you should — that’s what clergy are here for.

 

[Anomaly]

If your mother doesn't have a problem with you attending Church, and your two children being baptized, then she may not be as upset about the conversion as is thought. If the subject is brought up with her with the utmost kindness and assurance of the continuation of your love for her, then what more can be done?

What does your wife think? She may have some good ideas on how to approach the situation. You are very fortunate to have a Catholic wife. What does your SSPX priest think? Have you approached him for his advice in this matter? If not, you should — that’s what clergy are here for.

Thank you for your post. I will speak to my priest.

 

[lasunsets]

You're part of the One True Faith and you need to man up. When I became Catholic, I received so much hatred from my family and became a pariah. I am still a pariah to many of them. I don't care. I have Christ and Our Lady. You have Them too so do not be afraid.

 

[NoMoreTO]

My mother was driven up a wall in life. My negligent father and brother with a history of criminality and alcoholism and having to raise both of us by herself were enormous burdens. I can write at length about it, but the memories are painful and doing so is unnecessary for this post.

I do not want her to suffer any further in old age, but it feels like I’m living a lie.

It's a difficult discussion, I can appreciate that, although I can't say I have gone through anything like this. I think that if you take time to consider the discussion before hand, and pick the appropriate time it is something you should definitely do. Also agree with another poster that you've already married a Catholic and your kids are baptized, so it shouldn't be a big surprise.

I once heard a Priest describe something similar to this as "false mercy". Letting her know that you are indeed Catholic may for instance open her up to the possibility of joining you in the One True Church. As many of us know, it helps to have family who are practicing. She has a similar background to you in secular judaism so may very well be thirsting for the same thing, but is perhaps a little more set in her ways as she is older.

Pray for her, for guidance, and speaking to your priest are a great first step.

 

[KiwiCatholic]

Perhaps some of you can relate to this. I was baptized in April of this year and went through eight months of RCIA to convert to Catholicism.

I attend an SSPX chapel. As I’ve said elsewhere I’m an ethnic Jew who was atheistic for my early all my life up until three years ago. I married a white, Catholic woman and my two children were baptized. She knows we attend church. She has no problems with this.

My mother was driven up a wall in life. My negligent father and brother with a history of criminality and alcoholism and having to raise both of us by herself were enormous burdens. I can write at length about it, but the memories are painful and doing so is unnecessary for this post.

I do not want her to suffer any further in old age, but it feels like I’m living a lie.

Have any of you going through something similar?

If you can't even tell your mother that you are a member of the Holy Catholic Church how will you react when threatened with the death penalty for your Faith?

 

[Anomaly]

If you can't even tell your mother that you are a member of the Holy Catholic Church how will you react when threatened with the death penalty for your Faith?

Thanks for your reply. However I don’t see the connection between the two. My death is mine, not my mother’s. I do not think it is unreasonable to be concerned about my mothers well-being.

Care to elaborate?

 

[palsofchaos]

Have you tried inviting your mother to a Christmas service? Christmas mass tends to be beautiful with all the music before the service. Beauty can have a profound effect on people.

Your in a unique position. Jewish to Christian is a large gap. Acceptance might not happen right away and it might take some time.

 

[KiwiCatholic]

Thanks for your reply. However I don’t see the connection between the two. My death is mine, not my mother’s. I do not think it is unreasonable to be concerned about my mothers well-being.

Care to elaborate?

From what I gathered from your post you were afraid to tell your mother of your Faith due to human respect. If it is because you are afraid it will deeply hurt your mother, ultimately it is the most charitable thing to do as your witness to the Faith may be the reason she converts and saves her soul. It would be more charitable to tell her even if that initial statement causes a sting. Ask your confessor.

 

[nagareboshi]

@Anomaly great article from orthochristian: “I was afraid to tell my Jewish Father that we were baptized.”

Priest George Maximov. “I was afraid to tell my jewish Father that we were baptized.”

The guest of today’s program is Margarita Kaplun, of Jewish descent and a daughter of an Assistant Rabbi. After personally experiencing the power of praying to Our Lord Jesus Christ, she was baptized and led her parents to faith.

orthochristian.com

Father George: So, he let you know that you shouldn’t conceal this fact, but reason with your father somehow?

Margarita Kaplun: Yes, he said, “You have to tell him the truth.” So when we came home, I prayed and then told my father that we were baptized. I think only a person who lived in a Jewish family can understand my father’s reaction. He took it very hard. I saw tears in his eyes for the first time in my life. I thought that he would die right then. I ran to our neighbors and said, “He doesn’t want to see me now, please just stay with him, so you can help him if he is not feeling well.” Anyway, his first reaction was very negative, but my father loved me very much. I was his favorite daughter and we had a similar disposition, so his love for me made him somehow come to terms with this. Moreover, he started asking himself, “Who is this Christ who took away my daughter from me?” I heard him discuss this with his friends. They were asking, “Who are the apostles, who is Christ?”

 

[Anomaly]

@Anomaly great article from orthochristian: “I was afraid to tell my Jewish Father that we were baptized.”

Priest George Maximov. “I was afraid to tell my jewish Father that we were baptized.”

The guest of today’s program is Margarita Kaplun, of Jewish descent and a daughter of an Assistant Rabbi. After personally experiencing the power of praying to Our Lord Jesus Christ, she was baptized and led her parents to faith.

orthochristian.com

Thanks for this.

 

[Poche]

I would suggest that you ask for the intercession of St Teresa Benedicta of the Cross, otherwise known as Edith Stein. She would know what you went through because she said that her broke down in tears when she told her of her conversion and also when she told her of her entrance into the Carmelite convent. (The Discalced Carmelites are a strict contemplative community.)
St Teresa Benedicta of the Cross, pray for us.

 

[Laurus]

My parents, family friends and (former) friends take it badly that I was baptized Catholic, also April last year. Only one is genuinely curious about Catholicism while I get into arguments with everybody else. You have to witness to your mother your Catholic faith at one point, not for your or her sake, but for God, to testify and to be not ashamed of the Church He founded. As a previous poster said, it would contribute to her salvation. WIth Jews it is a peculiar and long affair, but it can be done.