Hinge dating app or no dating apps?

[Chasinglogos]

If you're really Orthodox and live that life you're on the short and narrow path. It's tough. Maybe get involved in a church and get matched by the friends you make there.
Plenty of females identify as Christian but they are mostly moral relativists. Somehow at the sametime puritanical about thier lefty politics.

 

[BananaLlama]

What about using dating apps to meet people in other countries? For example Badoo to introduce yourself to Russians.

 

[Blade Runner]

What about using dating apps to meet people in other countries? For example Badoo to introduce yourself to Russians.

I'd be interested in such examples.

 

[Marco B.]

I tried Tinder in 2017 for the first time.I was shocked by the bad results.A few dates, but the women were insane, cold, emotionless with unrealistic standards.After some weeks i deleted the app.
I tried Tinder in 2019/2020 again.I was hoping to get better results.But they were even worse.Even more insanity with even more unrealistic standards.I promised myself to never use it again.
Since some weeks the weather here in my area is extraordinary bad and people are forced to wear masks in shopping areas again.
Therefore Day-Gaming is almost useless.
So out of heavy boredom i tried Tinder (and now even Bumble) again for the last three weeks.I was hoping to get at least some entertaining and funny conversations on the phone.But now I am nothing but sick and tired of it.Now its even impossible to
have a sane conversation on the phone with all these damaged women.Their attention span is even less than two days.They will forget you much sooner than you think.There was a even a woman who openly confessed to me, that she lost the ability to fall in love because she used too much Dating-Apps.The dating scene is messed up beyond belief.
Yes, i know: Breaking promises you make to yourself is bad and lousy.Shame on me.

 

[PolishCalifornian]

This is the reason why it's even harder in the west for orthodox; the catholics have far more numbers and a good guilt complex to keep their traditions going, and so do the jews, who are just better at group identity and putting such things together. The orthodox and single website is the closest thing to it, and is a valiant effort, but is small and mostly older women, with some fake invaders - not enough people and a command to make it reasonable for a lot to try it out (even though it isn't expensive).

I can vouch for a friend finding a good, traditionally-minded wife through a Catholic site (him early 30s, her late 20s). I think traditional Christian women have problems in this area as well, while they probably have more men to choose from they also want the masculine qualities that (in my observation) a lot of trad-Cath men lack. I'm in a far-left area and mostly stuck at home for family reasons, so my dating life has been on hold, but I signed up for a Polish singles site at least until I can visit the homeland.

I suggested this in another thread but I think Orthodox men would be best off seeking out Ukrainian or Russian women given the overwhelming likelihood that they were at least baptized Orthodox. I don't know the numbers but my guess is that the non-Slavic, Orthodox dating pool in the US is miniscule, out of a relatively small population to start with, and the insularity of emigre families in the US only makes it harder. While I wouldn't necessarily suggest it now given the virus hysteria and the tensions with Russia, I only have fond memories of my trips to Ukraine and the women were more beautiful and feminine than in any other country I've visited. An even easier option is Poland where several million Ukrainians have settled since 2014. There are probably more single, Orthodox (though of course not all traditional), marriage-aged women in Warsaw alone than in all of America.

 

[Blade Runner]

I can vouch for a friend finding a good, traditionally-minded wife through a Catholic site (him early 30s, her late 20s). I think traditional Christian women have problems in this area as well, while they probably have more men to choose from they also want the masculine qualities that (in my observation) a lot of trad-Cath men lack. I'm in a far-left area and mostly stuck at home for family reasons, so my dating life has been on hold, but I signed up for a Polish singles site at least until I can visit the homeland.

I suggested this in another thread but I think Orthodox men would be best off seeking out Ukrainian or Russian women given the overwhelming likelihood that they were at least baptized Orthodox. I don't know the numbers but my guess is that the non-Slavic, Orthodox dating pool in the US is miniscule, out of a relatively small population to start with, and the insularity of emigre families in the US only makes it harder. While I wouldn't necessarily suggest it now given the virus hysteria and the tensions with Russia, I only have fond memories of my trips to Ukraine and the women were more beautiful and feminine than in any other country I've visited. An even easier option is Poland where several million Ukrainians have settled since 2014. There are probably more single, Orthodox (though of course not all traditional), marriage-aged women in Warsaw alone than in all of America.

You nailed it. It's like the problem generally being a 6+ woman anyway --- especially in modern america, you have to sift through so many approaches and suitors that it gets tiresome. I met some young catholic guys recently who I recommended doing the church group thing and meeting up people (since my friend and I were telling them our points of view as much older guys and how bad "dating" is) that were of their same background, and was somewhat shocked by two things: the insolence of one of the guys who thought he was being lectured to (to be honest a short guy who is nice and all but that no girl in a big city would ever desire, not being mean, just serious) and how much more affected by the "game" they were than I realized; they were late 20s guys. Not interested and probably not aware of what many religions teach, pathetically I bet they don't even know or really care about their own supposed faith. This stood out to me, trust me I'm not trying to burn them at all.

Looking back, as an orthodox in America if you weren't second generation (first born to immigrants) of something like Greek or Syrian, etc. where pressure and actual matchmaking collide to increase your odds (whether you like it or not), it is totally a miniscule amount, almost a fool's errand if you are decent looking or successful - you're just drowned out by the rest of the culture and let's face it, most of your interactions as a good looking girl or guy are 95% non-church people and places.

People around here act like there's some magical connection and transactional God aspect of finding a partner all the time, and I find it amusing at best, laughable (mostly) at worst. You have to have a certain number of interactions with a larger number of people to find a mate you are compatible with, period. That's science, that's life, that's probability, it's just how things are. Most people don't have lottery connections, which is why I refer to it as a lottery.

Poland, if it holds together, sounds like a great place/piece of advice for someone interested in what we are talking about. Thanks for that, bro.

 

[Blade Runner]

I tried Tinder in 2017 for the first time.I was shocked by the bad results.A few dates, but the women were insane, cold, emotionless with unrealistic standards.After some weeks i deleted the app.
I tried Tinder in 2019/2020 again.I was hoping to get better results.But they were even worse.Even more insanity with even more unrealistic standards.I promised myself to never use it again.
Since some weeks the weather here in my area is extraordinary bad and people are forced to wear masks in shopping areas again.
Therefore Day-Gaming is almost useless.
So out of heavy boredom i tried Tinder (and now even Bumble) again for the last three weeks.I was hoping to get at least some entertaining and funny conversations on the phone.But now I am nothing but sick and tired of it.Now its even impossible to
have a sane conversation on the phone with all these damaged women.Their attention span is even less than two days.They will forget you much sooner than you think.There was a even a woman who openly confessed to me, that she lost the ability to fall in love because she used too much Dating-Apps.The dating scene is messed up beyond belief.
Yes, i know: Breaking promises you make to yourself is bad and lousy.Shame on me.

Tinder was bad in 2015 and full on over in 2016, btw.

Day gaming, or whatever people call it, in the modern age still turns into texting after you get the number. Attention span, mobile phone garbage, all collide.

The only rule that remains is that until you go to a place where women need men, for whatever reason (social pressure, family, resources), nothing will change.

 

[SlickyBoy]

I heard that some dating apps are giving the option of asking for vax status. That might turn out to be a good filter, if you decide to go with apps at all. But generally I agree with Roosh - dating doesn't work.

 

[Blade Runner]

Yes, "dating" became a sly way of expanding options (ever so more and slightly/progressively) for women. If you think about that for a second, you'll see where it leads, and how in the big picture, it is not a good path for anyone in the society - men, women, or the civilization itself. But of course, you'll never convince a woman of that.

 

[EgoDeath]

"As an expert what do you think are the main reasons cheating women are rising in japan"

- "Women's socioeconomic rise and social media"

Feminism and tech, and ofc. other cultural marxist crap.

 

[Blade Runner]

Yes, more options and more possibilities ... leads to blaming the victim for the offender's behavior. Clown world is so easily predicted, because it is reproduced, over and over and over. No wonder we make fun of so many people for being "normies."

 

[Parmesan]

Could be location dependent, but the theme I seem to get from my (admittedly few now) single normie friends is that dating apps are pretty much dead. It seems like what the manosphere was telling us 10 years ago about these apps is pretty much the mainstream take now. Don’t think it’s going to result in any sort of a return to the packed nightlife heydays of the 2000s, but at least it seems a lot of men are waking up to the reality now. It could be my own bubble, but I do seem to hear more stuff about male self improvement now than I did years ago.

 

[Lawrence87]

When I have downloaded Tinder to "see what is out there" I inevitably end up falling into looking at pornography a little while afterwards. I think that says it all.

If you are going to dip your toes into online dating, you'd be better off going to a Christian dating site. However, even then there is potentially still the same issue. These sites are like a meat market, and sitting there looking at photos of beautiful women leads one to the wrong kinds of thoughts.

In some ways I think it's probably better to meet people in real life. Put yourself in situations where you will likely meet people with similar interests.

 

[sophistic-ated]

Good to know. I do all of those other things too “social clubs, parks, etc.” I realize hypergamy functions hard on those apps, so that’s where this comes from. I hate “hunting” for women though even though approaching doesn’t phase me as much anymore. It’s easy just walking up to people and being authentic even though it’s exhausting to keep seeking women. The apps are just so much easier. But, not to say the “easy” way is the “best” way in saying this. It seems like a “catch-22” nowadays.

Bro let other people hunt for you get some yentas. Especially the older church ladies. I get sent pictures of and get set up with cute "hard to find" unicorns on the regular by all my adopted aunties. I just have to help them with their gadgets and accompany them to social events now and then. Plus I love them all the more time I spend with them.

 

[SingularityOne]

Bro let other people hunt for you get some yentas. Especially the older church ladies. I get sent pictures of and get set up with cute "hard to find" unicorns on the regular by all my adopted aunties. I just have to help them with their gadgets and accompany them to social events now and then. Plus I love them all the more time I spend with them.

That’s a great idea. Haha, the priest’s wife of my parish and I get along, but I’m still getting to know some others due to switching to Antiochian from GOA recently.

 

[greyok]

Didn't read the thread, but from my experience, dating apps used to work about a decade ago but mostly in more rural areas and at younger ages. I mean <21. If you're in any city, it's overweight single mothers looking for a handout or literal prostitutes. You're better off going to a strip club or getting on "casual encounters" type websites and finding a woman because they're all "working" these days. Actually, they've been doing it for thousands of years, but hey.

What you need is the same thing as me. We need to get into local social scenes and communities. Make regular friends and get to know people. It's kind of like high school and college. It's meeting people in the same situation. Dating sites are just awkward. I'm even on Bumble and my profile is like "well traveled, ran business for 6 years, master's student" and I'm getting women telling me she's been in jail since 13 for stabbing someone, has 3 kids, blah blah blah. It's the worst of the worst.

Dating apps are like a sick game. Honestly, they're for-profit businesses. They need (typically male) customers to subscribe to premium services in order to make money. Then, they get strung along for the monthly subscriptions with shitty conversation. I wouldn't use any of them unless they're completely free, TBH. I would try stuff like MeetUp to find social groups without any pressure.

The other problem is just how women are. If she's remotely attractive she WILL literally sell it, whether on a stage twerking, on porn sites masturbating, or on hooker sites. You're giving women way too much credit and don't realize that they know they're attractive (if they are) and won't just straight up take advantage of you for cash.

I used to use regular old Facebook to date and found local pages/groups to talk to people. I'd hit them up and then take it private. I banged probably 5 chicks in 6 months in my local area just from that before some drama went down. It's not that hard.

For some reason, actually putting yourself out there as "trying to date" is worse than just trying to talk to new people. You'll get exploited real fast doing that.

The other problem is that attractive women EXPECT to get paid. Go on Chaturbate, Onlyfans, STG, etc., and women just expect cash for being pretty. Even though it's illegal, police don't enforce the law against women because they're women. The worst case is that they say they're trafficked or someone got them high or something and they get away with it.

 

[02Hero]

If you are good looking and have good photo's it is a great way to expose yourself to a lot of women. Just remember all women you meet through this channel have thousands of men messaging them. They can pick men like they are at a buffet. Even the average looking women. Does not mean you cannot find a good one. But you have to search, test and pick wisely. In this day and age I would not bet on 1.

I think it is more damaging to completely condemn this lifestyle - unless you have a good reason to. E.g. my health was so bad at a certain point I started noticing the dating lifestyle made me unhealthier and unhealthier. I had to leave it for a while. If you are in good health there is no reason not to.

The most important thing is that you don't lose yourself and you are strong and genuine to yourself. If you love yourself and are in tune with yourself no woman can destroy you. It is impossible. If you let a woman destroy your life, which a lot of men do, then no matter where you look, be it church, be it online dating, you will be miserable.

Women are women. Literally. Some women are just more damaged (harder to deal with perhaps) than others.

 

[Saxonia]

I generally have the feeling that things are a little different in the USA than where I live (Germany).
My neutral analysis is that dating apps are completely normalized these days. The same people you find there can also be found outside on the street, it is a cross-section of society. You can find "good" and "bad" women there, just like in any other place.

 

[greyok]

I generally have the feeling that things are a little different in the USA than where I live (Germany).
My neutral analysis is that dating apps are completely normalized these days. The same people you find there can also be found outside on the street, it is a cross-section of society. You can find "good" and "bad" women there, just like in any other place.

I bet it is different. That's what I was saying before, though, that women generally aren't the best on dating sites unless they're selling themselves. The few actually attractive women I see on Bumble and Hinge are foreign exchange students. Actually going outside is going to be the better approach in America.

 

[Jive Turkey]

Myself personally I got two dates from Upward and one date from Orthodox and single.

I would say give it a try and keep praying.

1st date: Upward - we went out three times. She was cute, nice, virgin, but really shy and in my opinion didn't have much in the way of personality. We went out three times and I tried to find "spark" but it wasn't there. I'm sure she will make some man very happy some day.

2nd date: Upward again. We talked on the phone ever night for a week before meeting. Had very good chemistry on the phone but she didn't disclose how large she was haha. She looked sturdy in her pics, but when I saw her in person her frame was just massive. She also made a passive aggressive comment about my friends that turned me off so we only went out once.

Orthodox and single: nice girl, cute but not a smoke show. We had good chemistry. I could tell right away she was a bit of a lefty but after the second date she revealed she was a flaming lib. I didn't say anything but when she was like "do you agree" I wasn't going to lie so I said "no and here is why". She was speechless after I laid out my "bizarre" political views, but was polite. We agreed to part ways and she genuinely wished me well.

So no catastrophes, but no home runs either. I say it is worth it to try for a week or so. But any longer than that will definitely drain your mental health.

Unironically a better use of time than dating apps would probably be prayer. Not just prayer for a mate, but praying to be the man God wants you to be and His will be done.

Good luck brother

Edit: Also, I would keep your mind open to Catholic dating sites or trying to make friends with some Catholic girls who can set you up. Catholicism is theologically way closer to Orthodoxy than protestantism, so they will be more open to dating an Orthodox than a protestant. And there has to be at least 50 Catholics for every Orthodox in this country, so you are casting a wider net.

Plus Catholic girls are super nice.