How are you as a homemaker? If you're good (or if you've learned), any advice for those who are not?

joy_grace

Sparrow
Woman
Other Christian
I mostly watch food stuff. Natasha's Kitchen and Tatyana's Everyday Food (she does a lot of nice desserts) are two of my favorites. I also like Lynette Yoder, she does more "home" type things.

I have a copy of The Joy of Cooking which never steers me wrong, too.

Thanks dear! I'll check it out.
 

Veemerk

Chicken
Woman
Protestant
I’m a new SAHM. I became a first time mom and stay-home at the same time. My husband is always at work and I’m alone a lot with the baby.

I have no advice since I am too new at this but I am getting better. Someone else here said it gets better with practice and that is encouraging.

I like what I am doing so I can only expect it will get better from here.
 

The Beast1

Peacock
Orthodox Inquirer
Gold Member
I struggle greatly with homemaking. First and foremost, it does NOT come naturally to me. I have a bit of an "absent-minded professor" personality. I'm FANTASTIC at nerdy academic stuff (which is a blessing I'm grateful for as a homeschooler), but I'm terrible at keeping my environment neat and tidy.

It becomes very all-or-nothing. In cases where my environment IS neat (just moved; just had car detailed; just cleaned for company, etc.) I can keep up on it IF I do it perfectly. But that first time where something happens (I get sick; we don't clean the car out right away after a trip, etc.), oh man, it all goes to pieces. It's like I can only clean that day's worth of mess; not more than a day. It's easy to say, "Well, just don't let more than one day accumulate", but that isn't real life.

It also doesn't help that I live with other people. It's bad enough keeping on top of my own mess, but when there are other people who don't automatically take care of their stuff... well, it just gets to be a lot.

Any thoughts or advice? Does anyone else share these struggles?
My wife is the INTJ archetype and asks herself this question regularly.

I tell her the mere fact she asked the question, seeks the blessings of Christ, and is actually trying puts her ahead of 95% of so many others. The final 5% is making mistakes, learning, getting better, and most importantly: teaching those lessons to our sons and daughters.

So yeah, I think you're on the path to be a pretty darn good homemaker.
 

Luna Novem

Kingfisher
Woman
Catholic
My wife is the INTJ archetype and asks herself this question regularly.

I tell her the mere fact she asked the question, seeks the blessings of Christ, and is actually trying puts her ahead of 95% of so many others. The final 5% is making mistakes, learning, getting better, and most importantly: teaching those lessons to our sons and daughters.

So yeah, I think you're on the path to be a pretty darn good homemaker.
Thank you, friend!
 

Kitty Tantrum

Kingfisher
Woman
Catholic
My wife is the INTJ archetype and asks herself this question regularly.

I tell her the mere fact she asked the question, seeks the blessings of Christ, and is actually trying puts her ahead of 95% of so many others. The final 5% is making mistakes, learning, getting better, and most importantly: teaching those lessons to our sons and daughters.
As a wife and mother who has oft been similarly summarized ("INTJ archetype"), I really needed to hear this. Thank you for sharing!

When we are very good at visualizing ideal/perfect systems in our mind's eye, it is very easy to feel like we are falling short in our performance in the real systems that actually exist in reality -- when others do not perceive us this way at all.
 

Oda Mae

Pigeon
Woman
Orthodox Inquirer
I am not a great homemaker, but have a few things that make it easier. I play music - normally Bobby Darin, Frank Sinatra -because my house is mid century and I associate those songs with happy housewives in simpler times. (I do not listen to that music any other time, which is interesting to me!).

If I am cooking something complicated, I pick music to go with it. Dinner music from Italy for making pasta and sauce, and so forth. Pandora makes it fun! Working with computers, smart phones and constant visual and audio stimulation means my attention span has shortened and I seem to work better on mindless tasks if my ears are engaged. I have a friend who listens to true crime podcasts, but I get too interested in them and lose track of cleaning. Something will click for you, then ride it into the ground!

Spend ten minutes every night walking through rooms, folding throws, stacking books and magazines, generally neatening. It makes getting up the next morning better, for sure.

I also love to say the Jesus Prayer while cooking or cleaning. It helps me focus and stay in the moment instead of worrying about what's coming next.

Finally, I am fortunate to have a retired husband who split the household chores so that he does the majority of it. I am responsible for emptying the dishwasher, cooking, and litterboxes. (He thinks I don't know how to load the dishwasher. I plan to keep it thatway. Another tip. Hah!)

We will renegotiate in April when I retire. Ugh.

I will have to comeback and re-read your thread when that happens.
 

Mrs.DanielH

Robin
Woman
Orthodox
I've been in nesting mode on and off for weeks. You could say my focus isn't the best. For example, I'll carry the hamper into the laundry room, then I get distracted by something else and start the dishes, then I get hungry and make myself something, and while I'm eating i start making a list of other things I have to do, i start vacuuming, then i remember the laundry and finally start that, etc.
The one day I was literally in the middle of 5 different tasks at once, not doing any of them efficiently. By the end of those days my back and feet hurt so much. Other days I'm just too tired to do much or I get distracted by planning/worrying about what needs to be done instead of actually doing it. I'm just hoping to get all the baby related stuff done in time.
 

Kitty Tantrum

Kingfisher
Woman
Catholic
For example, I'll carry the hamper into the laundry room, then I get distracted by something else and start the dishes, then I get hungry and make myself something, and while I'm eating i start making a list of other things I have to do, i start vacuuming, then i remember the laundry and finally start that, etc.
This sounds a lot like me ever since I got thrown off my game by illness! It's starting to get better gradually, but I've had a few days recently where I thought I'd done okay... and then had to re-wash laundry the next morning before drying, because it sat wet in the washing machine all day and night, completely forgotten. :squintlol:

Editing to add:

I'm trying to get myself back on-point enough RE: homemaking and housekeeping, to throw an honest-to-goodness Christmas party of some sort next Winter. Our holidays were very quiet this past year with the kids away at their dad's house, and my husband mentioned that he misses the "big family dinner" style holidays he grew up having. Our place is too small for anything huge, but I think I can put together something very nice on a very small budget.

I've never been one for seasonal decorating, but I "invested" in some very nice decorations and very nice table linens and soforth... for about 5% of original price in most cases. Maybe it's because people are paranoid about "COVID" right now, but I've found so many really nice things in pristine "used, like new" condition on Amazon for prices that are absolutely insane.

I guess it's always been a homemaking pro-tip to shop for seasonal decor AFTER the season... but I never knew before that you could get those sorts of crazy deals online. On Amazon. With free returns if it ends up being underwhelming or poor quality.

I know Amazon is evil, but if they give me the cheap membership because I'm poor, and I'm savvy enough to pay less for the things I order than what it should cost just to ship it... my hamster wheel says this qualifies as depleting enemy resources. Also, that Christmas season next year at my house is going to be LIT (incandescently).
 
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