Manager inappropriately touching people

I would like your advice on this matter. I'm the security guard in a large toy store and have noticed that the head manager can be somewhat strange in ways. He can sometimes stand too close to me and can sometimes be a bit touchy. It might be something small, like when he'd point at something that would happen to be in my direction, his finger would go right up near my eye. He seems gay, but I'm told he's married.

I didn't think too much of it until one evening I delivered him bad news about a shoplifting incident that had occurred. After I'd told what was stolen he asked "and where were you?". I told him that I was doing a cash lift with another manager but I think I kind of stuttered when I said it, and maybe didn't sound too convincing. Anyway, as he walked past me he sort of walked into me with his shoulder, and then leaving his hand swing into my hip as he walked off. I didn't know how to react and didn't say anything. I tried to tell myself that he was just stressed. But I couldn't. I would never do that to someone myself unless I was on the pitch or something.

Anyway, due to days offs and holidays, followed by a Covid 19 lockdown, I didn't end up seeing him after that for about another 3 months. I figured it was too long ago to bring up and sort of decided to let it go. I did however feel hurt; as I thought he was a nice guy. I used to also enjoy bringing him the good news of how I stopped a robbery... and I used that in itself to motivate myself to be good at the job. But then he was a bit touchy another time... not as bad as the time before of course (no way I'd let him repeat that), but it still somehow managed to catch me off guard. I then noticed this sort of behavior from him towards others.

One day he called a member of staff up to the customer service area on the intercom. This guy was about 18, and somewhat short in height. He then reached into his personal space and grabbed his walkie-talkie off his belt! I didn't want to be nosy so I didn't look around. When I eventually did turn around I saw the young fella's walkie-talkie fall on the ground. He picked it up and the manager was laughing. The young fella was laughing too, but it looked like he was just laughing it off out of awkwardness. I sensed that he was somehow taking advantage of the fact that this young guy wouldn't know how to deal with such behavior.

One day as he was walking side by side with another male staff member, he hit him across the back side with some thing from around the store. He did it very casually, and the other guy did not react at all. I'd love to know what he was thinking when it was done to him. You know that feeling when something inappropriate is done to you from someone you'd least expect, and because they act like it's normal (and because it happens so fast), that you simply don't know how to react? I think he might have experienced a bit of that when this was done to him. Or at least I might have if it were me in his shoes. I tried to tell myself maybe it's not that big a deal, or maybe they know each other pretty well. But would the manager wouldn't do that to a girl?

I knew something weird had happened so I looked at it on the cameras later. When my back was turned the manager walked straight into the young guy, presumably knowing that he'd move out of the way before their faces made contact. The young guy was taken completely by surprise and had to move out of the way so that the walkie-talkie fell to the floor.

Since I'm the security guard I was able to save a clip of what happened with the young fella to my USB which clearly shows him almost walking right through him. The other things that happened were out of camera shot. It's clear that if he notices someone will tolerate this behavior, that he'll be a lot more likely to do it to them. Anyway, I don't like the way this manager has been acting lately, and it's stirred up the emotions from the time he walked into me. and I happen to have been offered a job elsewhere. I've kept note of all these events so I am planning on sending a clip of this to the head office of the company chain, along with a letter detailing other incidents.

The only funny thing, is that some of the other female managers were far worse than this guy. It's just I don't have anything on them if you know what I mean. There was another male manager there who was a racist who I also have some dirt on, but I'm not sure yet if I'll leave that go. In general though, it's always easier to get back at a man somehow.
 

kinjutsu

Pelican
Keep your nose clean and out of other peoples business, unless you want him and the other managers to make trouble for you.

I have worked about 12 years of retail combined in various roles. Retail attracts probably the worse type of person. Petty, jealous, vindictive, stupid, useless etc.
You very very rarely meet quality people and if you do they don't stay around for long.

Don't get involved unless a complaint is filed and you're asked if you saw anything. But beware that if you say anything you'll be seen as a snitch and have a target on your back for the rest of your time at that place.

For yourself: You should focus on increasing your confidence, letting some man you dont really like touch your face is a huge issue in regards to personal boundaries that you need to deal with.

As far as the other touching goes this guy is trying to "AMOG" you since he's the manager and you work for him. Next he touches you calmly tell him to never touch you again. Don't leave him any room to try to joke about it. When/If he tries to touch you again you hit his hand away. Gay, straight, trans, rainbow unicorn it doesn't matter, you should never lt another man touch you if you dotn want him to.
 
Don't get involved unless a complaint is filed and you're asked if you saw anything. But beware that if you say anything you'll be seen as a snitch and have a target on your back for the rest of your time at that place.
I plan on filing a complaint. I've been offered a job that starts in a few weeks. It's just I'm not sure if I should put in the footage too, because that's technically not my property.
Next he touches you calmly tell him to never touch you again. Don't leave him any room to try to joke about it. When/If he tries to touch you again you hit his hand away. Gay, straight, trans, rainbow unicorn it doesn't matter, you should never lt another man touch you if you don't want him to.
Unfortunately, I don't think he'd try it on me again.

The last time he touched me was kind of different. I'd just finished telling him about how I'd stopped a thief stealing a item worth €230. He grabbed my shoulder and said "turn around there". I said in a firm voice "what are you doing?". He then patted me on the side of my shoulder. He assumed that I'd turn around for him and that he'd get to give me a 'well done' pat on the back. An unusual way to congratulate someone! It would have been hard to give out to him for doing that given that he meant well by it. There were others there to see this, so I'd have been owned if I turned around for him.
 
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