My view on dating in the USA.....is this accurate?

pitbullowner

Pelican
That's really sad man -- I know a few girls who also had seemingly solid upbringings and were eventually devoured by their friends immorality in University.

With a strong enough father and family this can be avoided but I've seen some pretty bad cases. For guys and girls both.

One of my colleagues I work with is sending her daughter to a Chicago liberal arts theatre college, the father (divorced from my colleague) was totally against it, refused to sign off on her FAFSA thus putting the complete financial burden on my colleague. I would never do such a thing, especially with the whole garbage that's going on in all the major cities.

I applaud the ex husband of hers...i admire him greatly . I knew him for a while too when I used to go to his church. Good ole fashioned naturally red pilled farmer.

My colleague is a 2nd wave hippie/ feminist type too. I can see the rot of what her college years did to her, and I pity her. She's now bumping it with some defense contractor HR guy.

If I was 60 and just looking for a quick ride or had my old habits from 5 years ago, I'd have done many things with my colleague... but now I see the destructive nature of those actions with clarity. I feel for her kids though..her son is withdrawn and introverted but still plays football for the school he's at.
Her daughter is a socially anxious wreck & college is going to completely turn her into a flaming SJW if she gets wrapped up with the wrong people... the divorce took its toll on her hard... College is a place you send your kids to get indoctrinated, not learn.

Don't send your kids to college unless you are going to have them enroll in STEM classes please guys.
 

Zeknichov

Pigeon
Education seems to ruin women. They go from feminine humans that care about men into these selfish animals that only care about themselves and see men as nothing more than a tool. I've seen it time and time again. The only ones that aren't impacted are ones from extremely strong families, also usually fairly religious.

My ex's father had a heart attack when she was growing up and he never recovered from it so her mother took the dominant role in the household. Obvious warning sign now but no one teaches guys these things. We're left to just make mistake after mistake while women benefit financially from our mistakes. Men really need to start teaching their sons about women. Only men have the power to fix things. Valuing chastity in themselves and in women is the single greatest value a man can be taught. Sexual liberation ruins loves and family.
 
Do you happen to know anything more about these Mennonites and what they might be like in Canada? What's the lifestyle like if you convert?
The church I attended was this one: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plymouth_Brethren
The Assemblies of Brethren did not descent from the Mennonites, but the particular church I attended did. They are integrated in society but are not part of it. They socialize mostly or exclusively with fellow church members. These people are simple and follow strict rules.

I'm not bitter about it at all though.
You're a better man than I am. I can stay bitter for a long time until I can forgive somebody.

I agree with you regarding education. It is so very difficult to find quality educated women. Even among the quality educated women I've met, most feel obligated to work because of all the time/money they invested into education (along with social pressures from their peers) but then you can feel the pull they feel regarding how deep down, their femininity is calling them to stay home and nurture their children instead of sending their children to state-run day cares all day.
This is why I'm attracted to women who have a genuine heart and soul, and most you find in jobs such as retail, farming, teaching, floristry etc. Women in universities believe they know it all and you can't tell them otherwise, that's what disgusts me so much about them. The exception is for women who study in humanistics, they are liberal but some are genuinely open for partriarchic, sexist, and fascist men.
 

Zeknichov

Pigeon
The church I attended was this one: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plymouth_Brethren
The Assemblies of Brethren did not descent from the Mennonites, but the particular church I attended did. They are integrated in society but are not part of it. They socialize mostly or exclusively with fellow church members. These people are simple and follow strict rules.


You're a better man than I am. I can stay bitter for a long time until I can forgive somebody.


This is why I'm attracted to women who have a genuine heart and soul, and most you find in jobs such as retail, farming, teaching, floristry etc. Women in universities believe they know it all and you can't tell them otherwise, that's what disgusts me so much about them. The exception is for women who study in humanistics, they are liberal but some are genuinely open for partriarchic, sexist, and fascist men.
Thanks for the suggestion. That church is too cult for me. I'll probably just explore some local baptist churches and see what I can find. I still want to be integrated with modern society and have the freedom to choose my own actions. Any church that promotes too strongly being disintegrated with the rest of society to such an extent as to even vilify you or promote its memebers, including your own family, to vilify you if you don't adhere to the church's strict segregation rules isn't for me. Something like LDS would be the most disintegrated of any church/community I'd join but I'm not certain on the whole worshiping a false prophet thing and the required 10% tithe. That likely leaves me back to just regular baptist churches and hoping to find a modern woman who rejects modernity but isn't ignorant to what it is. So basically, I'll probably just end up single lol.
 

Repo

Hummingbird
Y’all are really talking about 16 year olds :confused:

Seems out it touch to list online dating and going out and “gaming” as the primary dating methods. Believe it or not most people are still going out and making friends and meeting people through social circles and events. Maybe you need to make better and more friends.
 
Thanks for the suggestion. That church is too cult for me. I'll probably just explore some local baptist churches and see what I can find. I still want to be integrated with modern society and have the freedom to choose my own actions. Any church that promotes too strongly being disintegrated with the rest of society to such an extent as to even vilify you or promote its memebers, including your own family, to vilify you if you don't adhere to the church's strict segregation rules isn't for me. Something like LDS would be the most disintegrated of any church/community I'd join but I'm not certain on the whole worshiping a false prophet thing and the required 10% tithe. That likely leaves me back to just regular baptist churches and hoping to find a modern woman who rejects modernity but isn't ignorant to what it is. So basically, I'll probably just end up single lol.
What you're searching for doesn't exist. It is either or. Cults like these (wich Baptists are part of too) need to be formed to instill traditional values and moral behavior in times like these. Finding a middle ground is futile. Look at the Catholic and Orthodox Churches that went with the flow: you can't take most members seriously.

[content removed - mod.]
 

Zeknichov

Pigeon
Y’all are really talking about 16 year olds :confused:

Seems out it touch to list online dating and going out and “gaming” as the primary dating methods. Believe it or not most people are still going out and making friends and meeting people through social circles and events. Maybe you need to make better and more friends.
Well, though I was suspended for discussing 16yos it is legal in my country. I'll refrain from that discussion though given what the moderators have said.

As far as I am concerned, women are absolutely ruined as potential wives in the west if they've embraced modernity and I haven't seen anything contrary to that.

I make friends very easily. I have made a number of friends in the last few years I've lived in this new city I'm in. I've joined night classes, I've joined sports clubs, I've gone on group outdoor activities, I've gone to bars, I've gone to churches, I've joined fraternities, I've done volunteer work, I've joined not-for-profit organizations, I've joined the board of local arts groups, etc... I have made numerous friends and I have met tons of people and I have met people from the friends I've made etc...

There is an undeniable pattern. Younger women place value on materialism, social reputation and sexual attractiveness over and above anything else. They are hypergamous. They overestimate their own value because our society has taught them this is their value and the relationships they form are transactional in nature. Men are not seen as love interests but rather as lifestyle enhancement accessories. Most of these women's lifestyles are based upon the very basic of emotional impulses: how much traveling they can do, how much recognition they'll receive within their social networks for the relationship or how satisfying the man is in the moment of stroking their ego and pussies. The problem is that any relationship grounded in this is superficial and lacks longevity. Most men enter relationships with these women from a position of weakness and are controlled by the prospect of sex and the emotional attachment that they desire such that they are repressed from truly taking a leadership role and being their own man (pussy whipped). Most of these relationships will be temporary even if there is marriage and kids involved and you can spot them a mile away because they're grounded on the wrong basis.

The women in the aforementioned category who got too greedy early on in life get older and then they start to settle for a relationship out of necessity rather than desire; however, is even worse because now the women have learned to use their emotional comfort and sex as a weapon against men to get what they want. It becomes a power game to their women. These women never truly give the kind of love men seek because if they truly gave into such emotional vulnerability they would lose their leverage over the men and they already felt how much that hurts when they were younger (when they did truly love a man), so they refuse to ever give the man this sort of love again. These women are outright broken and the relationships are based on a false premise of love. Most of these relationships are also temporary because the woman realizes she still truly desires the kind of man she desired when she was younger before she felt forced into settling.

You have all of the above at play and then the fact that in terms of attractiveness, most women aren't actually very attractive anymore in western society. Women are crass, masculine, competitive, arrogant, fake, superficial, aggressive, challenging, belligerent, focused on career and political ideological "isms" more than their relationship and nurturing children. This makes the number of actually attractive, suitable women for relationships pretty low.

You say, just go meet more women but sadly, if you're just going out in public to meet your average women in western society, it's like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Shouldn't you be searching for a needle at a thread store where you know you'll find a needle? That's what all this discussion about 16yos and cults etc... is all about. That's why most guys on this forum talk about traveling over seas. That's why (last time I checked), the guy running this website figured he was going to be alone forever (maybe that's change, I don't follow all the latest updates). It's because modernity doesn't actually create women suitable for relationships on average. Most people are just blinded to the truth and getting caught up in the veil of deceit regarding relationships that have been pulled over all our eyes. Some people get lucky. For the vast majority of people, modern relationships don't seem to be working.
 

Blade Runner

Kingfisher
You have all of the above at play and then the fact that in terms of attractiveness, most women aren't actually very attractive anymore in western society. Women are crass, masculine, competitive, arrogant, fake, superficial, aggressive, challenging, belligerent, focused on career and political ideological "isms" more than their relationship and nurturing children. This makes the number of actually attractive, suitable women for relationships pretty low.

You say, just go meet more women but sadly, if you're just going out in public to meet your average women in western society, it's like trying to find a needle in a haystack. Shouldn't you be searching for a needle at a thread store where you know you'll find a needle? That's what all this discussion about 16yos and cults etc... is all about. That's why most guys on this forum talk about traveling over seas. That's why (last time I checked), the guy running this website figured he was going to be alone forever (maybe that's change, I don't follow all the latest updates). It's because modernity doesn't actually create women suitable for relationships on average. Most people are just blinded to the truth and getting caught up in the veil of deceit regarding relationships that have been pulled over all our eyes. Some people get lucky. For the vast majority of people, modern relationships don't seem to be working.
Bingo. Sad to say.

You wrote all of that just to justify talking about going overseas for 16 year olds, wow.
Maybe he did, but it is true.

As an aside, I would say from extensive research based strictly on physical appearance and what I know about biology that a woman's window is age 16-26. Of course there are outliers, and legal issues should be always adhered to, but this is the pure reality when it comes to a woman and SMV. I challenge anyone to look at women online, in real life, etc and do a comparison of the diminishing returns when post 26. It's actually quite astonishing and just from my pure eye a few years back for shitty online, you could tell within just a couple of months that this was the reality of the world. The funny thing about online is that women think they can fool men, even in the slightest way visually. You can't fool the evolution of 100-200k plus years, it's actually funny to think about.
 
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griffinmill

Kingfisher
Over the last 2.5 years I have been on dates with over 100 different women. Some weeks I had a new woman every day. Some months I'd spend $2000 just on dating alone. Within that period of time I had about 3 relationships that lasted 2-3 months. I met all these women either through online dating or going out to the bar.

It is absolutely brutal out there. Most women are crass, over-confident, combative/competitive, egotistic, masculine and greedy. Not a single woman has been worth my time. Everything you say is accurate. Most of these women overvalue themselves and act as if you are worth nothing to them. Even the 200 pound fat girl feel entitled to you. Women see relationships as purely transactional. You are nothing more than an accessory to their lifestyle. I don't think the majority of women understand love at all or desire it.

I'm just going to second that other guy regarding Russians. Stay the fuck away from Russians. They look and sound good on paper but they're the most selfish and uncompromising out there.

I've really been at a loss lately on this subject lately which is why I'm on here. It's the one thing in my life I wish I could complete. My latest probably bad idea is I'm going hiking with a group of Mormon on Sunday.

Sadly, I think romantic relationships are pretty much over. You can find business partnerships out there that you can engage in if you're willing to settle for a woman your heart will never truly desire who will never truly excite you but if you seek love, passion and intimacy, you're pretty much out of luck. Almost every country worth living in has been compromised and if you bring any woman back to a civilization that has promoted sexual liberation and cultural marxism (almost all developed countries), she'll eventually turn on you as she becomes greedy like everyone else.

You have to find women who have a solid grounding in an impersonal morality. I think silos of extremely religious women or women from small towns in countries where they don't speak English might be the only places left.
I have the same experience. I am now in my forties and have had hundreds of first dates and a handful of semi-long term relationships, but none of them have worked out because of my unwillingness to compromise on issues that have cropped up, and now what I'm finding is my main source of women - dating apps, once a bountiful exploit - is now a bush that has been pruned within an inch of its life and is becoming a significant time expenditure without any real, tangible results.

The one thing I can say about the apps, is that it brought into my life a wonderful friend who I dated for a while but remain close with, and we see each other pretty much every day and have a wonderful, close relationship.

But saying that, dating provides a real insight into female psychology, and being exposed to this over the years can turn you very cynical.

About Russian / Ukrainian women. The last girl I was legitimately excited about was a beautiful girl from Russia who entered my life just at the right time, and ticked so many boxes for me. Alas, within 3 short months the cracks began to appear and I quickly realised I was dealing with an abusive, selfish, and downright unpleasant individual. This soured me and left me angry for probably a year, maybe more.

Russians and Ukranians, in my experience, are very cynical operators. All that glitters ain't gold.

The implosion of this all too brief relationship made me think about all of the red flags I've witness in many - not all, but many - of my exes who were primarily from the UK. Believe me when I say it can be a rare thing to find a girl who adds to your life in a positive way. I'm talking about someone who is kind and allows you a certain amount of freedom, who doesn't react like a 12 year old when things don't go her way, who treats you with the common decency you treat her.

It's rare, gentlemen.

So where am I at, right now? I'm still getting dates, but only with women who have an impacted SMV. When I travel outside of the UK things are marginally better. But the older you get the narrower and narrower your opportunities become, and if you're going to try apps or meetup.com to try and meet someone, you're going to be yielding miserable results, because anytime a women has to be proactive in her pursuit of a partner by actually joining some kind of group or site, that's your first red flag.

Women in most western countries tend to walk around now with an inflated sense of self-esteem. It's remarkable how many of them I spot on my daily walk, gathered in groups and gossiping in the loudest, most grating voices. That is, of course, when they don't have their nose buried in their phone. These are trying times, gents, and it's not going to get any better.
 
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GibsMeDat

Sparrow
My approach has recently been to "go out and live life" and stop viewing dating as a science. The consensus with most guys that have successful marriages seems to be that they were just doing their own thing and met a solid girl.

I remember somebody asked why they can't meet any (male) friends who were on their purpose, and the answer was, because they aren't just sitting around chit chatting and killing time. Same thing goes for women -- though they won't have nearly as much purpose as their male counterparts, I just don't see the need for a solid woman to be sitting around killing time with dating.
 

Easy_C

Crow
Sometimes the logistics are a reason why a girl is not married even though she's long overdue. From my experience, it is usually because the girl has a couple screws loose, which doesn't mean that she lacks morals, just saying that she has one or several severe mental issues that block her from pairbonding with a man. I've met enough virgins over 20, religious and non-religious, and while they were one of the best girls I've met, at the same time I had zero sexual interest despite their good looks. There was always something vehemently asexual about them despite them wanting to be married.
And sometimes it's because they need time to realize the right guy isn't where there looking and they need to relax their criteria as was the case in my situation. She decided to look on a Catholic site to open up her search to guys further away and it took her only a few days before we met.
 

Days of Broken Arrows

Crow
Gold Member
@Mr.Freedom

"I feel like we have hit an inverse of the situation from the 70s and 80s when sex was more rampant. I guess people had a more care free attitude of life without caring much about the consequences - the current millennial and zoomer generation who were produced from that previous group are a testament to that. However instead of trying to improve themselves the millennial/zoomer generation would rather spend their time complaining about the opposite sex because of the lack of their ability to create let alone sustain a genuine relationship with an individual be it for a brief period let alone long term."

I respectfully disagree that it comes down to individual zoomers/millennials not wanting to improve themselves. There are many millennials and zoomers (especially males) who go through the process of improving themselves....the reality is there a very few quality women out there.

In regards to some people saying online dating distorts a man's perception of reality. I agree with this. COVID, social distancing, and leftist ideology are all working against in person interactions though.

It's so easy for older men to say "just improve yourself." The reality is the top tier of men go beyond looks, decent income, and basic game.

Social media and online dating have changed the market.

Imagine you are picking from 100 restaurants....you will choose only the very best. This is the scenario women are presented with.......they will choose the best they can get. Why wouldn't they?

"So be the very best", you say.

By chasing the tippy top of men these women will inevitably go through pump and dumps and failed relationships. I don't understand how older guys can't see the dilemma.

Don't commit to broken women. A simple heuristic for not getting wrecked.

I do feel bad for the zoomers. Tik tok has likely ruined a good portion of their generation. If i was going to place a bet, I'd say marriage rates will continue to drop. Same with birth rates.

Very sad to see.
There is a little more to this, though.

The rules have changed in society. When I was in my twenties, workplace dating was THE thing. Now it's verboten. At 24-25, I would regularly take out high school interns who were 18, but I'd also get taken out by the divorced fortysomething women who worked in my department. Then there were the women who were my age. Anything went.

This would be inconceivable now.

But back then, it was weird if you weren't dating someone from the office. I did a count and there were over twenty marriages evolved out of the old office during the prime years I worked there.

One of those marriages was the newspaper publisher who dated (gasp!) one of his subordinates. OMG! OMG!! Even though that marriage is now going on 30 years, we'd better call the HR department and file a retroactive complaint!!

See how ridiculous all this is? We can thank feminists for the change.

Instead of dating someone we've gotten to know and trust in real life, we're now thrown to the moronic "apps," where we get to meet total strangers who concoct semi-fictional "histories" of themselves to go with their doctored photos.

This is progress?
 

andy dufresne

Woodpecker
There is a little more to this, though.

The rules have changed in society. When I was in my twenties, workplace dating was THE thing. Now it's verboten. At 24-25, I would regularly take out high school interns who were 18, but I'd also get taken out by the divorced fortysomething women who worked in my department. Then there were the women who were my age. Anything went.

This would be inconceivable now.

But back then, it was weird if you weren't dating someone from the office. I did a count and there were over twenty marriages evolved out of the old office during the prime years I worked there.

One of those marriages was the newspaper publisher who dated (gasp!) one of his subordinates. OMG! OMG!! Even though that marriage is now going on 30 years, we'd better call the HR department and file a retroactive complaint!!

See how ridiculous all this is? We can thank feminists for the change.

Instead of dating someone we've gotten to know and trust in real life, we're now thrown to the moronic "apps," where we get to meet total strangers who concoct semi-fictional "histories" of themselves to go with their doctored photos.

This is progress?
Every action society takes aims to separate us further and further. If you look behind it you always find the lawyers and thieves. When we lose our ability to form genuine human bonds in a natural fashion the only recourse is to search for those feelings through artificial and commercial means thereby enriching those that seek to do us harm. File under 'coronavirus.'
 

Days of Broken Arrows

Crow
Gold Member
Every action society takes aims to separate us further and further. If you look behind it you always find the lawyers and thieves. When we lose our ability to form genuine human bonds in a natural fashion the only recourse is to search for those feelings through artificial and commercial means thereby enriching those that seek to do us harm. File under 'coronavirus.'
Before online dating, people had to date people they knew from school, the neighborhood, or the workplace.

While this didn't assure politeness, it did force people into being more humane, because everyone had friends or co-workers in common. You couldn't "ghost" the girl in accounting because then all the women in that department would hate you and this would spill over into the office and soon everyone would think badly of you.

So, maybe you made a lame excuse as to why you didn't want to go out again. But at least you had the veneer of politeness. We've lost that veneer. People have become ugly because we're all a bunch of strangers online.
 

Rob Banks

Pelican
My take on modern dating is that it’s all bullsh*t.

I agree with Roosh when he has said over and over that any women you find through secular dating will be a secular woman and the marriage, if it lasts, will not be good.

This is true even if the woman goes to church and claims to be Christian.

I don’t think there’s really any point in discussing the pros and cons of this secular dating method versus that method, or secular dating in the ‘80s versus now.

P.S. I would include online dating on Christian sites (like Christian Mingle or whatever) in the definition of “secular dating,” even if you are looking for marriage.
 

homersheineken

Woodpecker
Before online dating, people had to date people they knew from school, the neighborhood, or the workplace.

While this didn't assure politeness, it did force people into being more humane, because everyone had friends or co-workers in common. You couldn't "ghost" the girl in accounting because then all the women in that department would hate you and this would spill over into the office and soon everyone would think badly of you.

So, maybe you made a lame excuse as to why you didn't want to go out again. But at least you had the veneer of politeness. We've lost that veneer. People have become ugly because we're all a bunch of strangers online.
It's also encouraged by the brash and uncivilized culture of today. Look at the music on the top of the charts (I think the Cardi B song lyrics have been posted a number of times), reality tv that scripts bad behavior, I could go on but I'm in a good mood right now and don't want to ruin in it.
 

STG

Robin
In today's society, the word marriage is obsolete. Even calling most peoples' domestic partnerships "marriage" is wrong.

Marriage comes from a time when the woman was expected to be a virgin. She would be married to then stay home and run the house, care for the children. Cooking and cleaning. No career the woman was the home maker. The man provided. Both genders had clearly defined responsibilities.

Then the Marxist takeover occurred.

Now men regularly get married to women who would be declared unmarriageable in the past. Your average woman in the West today is literally what a prostitute was in the past.

If you disagree with me on this, show me the line that a woman crosses today to officially become a prostitute. Is going on tinder dates 3 times a week and fornicating with strangers different then a street walker?

The statistics on divorce today say over 60% of marriages end in divorce..... what do you expect when you "married" what would be a prostitute in the past, the times of successful marriages?

There is a reason that every great civilization had strict monogamy. These same civilizations vanished when feminism was established.

Don't worry, I'm sure this time it will be different.

 
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