My view on dating in the USA.....is this accurate?

Maddox

Robin
@Mikeyd03

Some thoughts -

Other venues exist:
- church (in view of your statement, it depends on the church you go to)
- the gym
- community/volunteer service
- farmer's markets
- social groups (i.e. like meetup if you can stomach the propaganda these mainstream organizations throw at you)

Ghosting is a recurring phenomenon. In general, most have no incentive nor accountability nowadays; that is simply something one needs to adapt to.

Post-corona online dating dynamics may change in my opinion.

Also, the social environment varies state to state, city to city, some more locked down than others.

Have you actually met girls at a farmer's market?

That's something I haven't tried yet...prolly because every time I've approached a woman in a Whole Foods/Sprouts type of market, I get no signs that the woman even wants to have a conversation. Making an innocent comment about a product she's looking at doesn't even get me a look me up and down from her to see if I'm her type. Instead, I just get a canned response that almost seems to say, "Are you really hitting on me at the grocery store while I'm trying to do my weekly shopping?"
 

Parmesan

Woodpecker
Would you say 26 is too late?
Absolutely not. You are still in the "okay to fail" period of life, and you won't overly feel like "the old guy" learning new skills and training at new jobs among slightly younger men. If you are utterly aimless and lacked male influence, I'd still suggest the military despite the concerning wokeness. Otherwise look into getting on the list with various higher skilled trade unions. There are alot of high skill trades I wish I would have been aware of when I was younger. Most of them don't promote themselves and barely have websites. I'm speaking from a US perspective by the way.

Unless you are super passionate about it, I would avoid the temptation to pick up programming (a common thing for people looking for a hail mary career change). Not only is it generally a low-T, soy/woke environment, It's extremely saturated and the barrier to entry only get's harder every month and year that goes by. Similar things could be said of white collar STEM in general from what I've seen. Programming is a great skill, but don't expect any job from just picking up Python and/or JavaScript.

I also wouldn't be afraid to start or buy a small business just to gain experience. You don't have to married to it, but the responsibility and get up and go required will be a strong building block for the future.
 
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SingularityOne

Robin
Orthodox
Absolutely not. You are still in the "okay to fail" period of life, and you won't overly feel like "the old guy" learning new skills and training at new jobs among slightly younger men. If you are utterly aimless and lacked male influence, I'd still suggest the military despite the concerning wokeness. Otherwise look into getting on the list with various higher skilled trade unions. There are alot of high skill trades I wish I would have been aware of when I was younger. Most of them don't promote themselves and barely have websites. I'm speaking from a US perspective by the way.

Unless you are super passionate about it, I would avoid the temptation to pick up programming (a common thing for people looking for a hail mary career change). Not only is it generally a low-T, soy/woke environment, It's extremely saturated and the barrier to entry only get's harder every month and year that goes by. Similar things could be said of white collar STEM in general from what I've seen. Programming is a great skill, but don't expect any job from just picking up Python and/or JavaScript.

I also wouldn't be afraid to start or buy a small business just to gain experience. You don't have to married to it, but the responsibility and get up and go required will be a strong building block for the future.
Oh, I was talking more regarding finding a good mate. But, yes, I’m in the US as well and will be starting a therapy private practice upon graduating from my masters degree in a month. Got some capital saved up and I’m prepared for it to the degree I can be. It’ll take time to build, but I’m confident it’ll work out.
 

Max Roscoe

Pelican
Orthodox Inquirer
Have you actually met girls at a farmer's market?

That's something I haven't tried yet...prolly because every time I've approached a woman in a Whole Foods/Sprouts type of market, I get no signs that the woman even wants to have a conversation. Making an innocent comment about a product she's looking at doesn't even get me a look me up and down from her to see if I'm her type. Instead, I just get a canned response that almost seems to say, "Are you really hitting on me at the grocery store while I'm trying to do my weekly shopping?"
I met a very attractive girl at a farmers market a couple of years back, got her phone number, but couldn't get her out.
She was with a friend, I believe I just chatted them up for a while and she was new in town, probably said hey let me show you a few cool spots around town. I got her digits but I think she claimed to have a boyfriend or something (should be a red flag--either she's making it up or shes willing to cheat on her partner).

I think the farmers market (at least the hipster type ones that are popular now, not the REAL ones--there is a huge difference) is a more social event so it's far more conducive to meeting people than the grocery store, though I had a good friend that often met women in the grocery.

That said, I'm no longer actively dating, and am pretty apprehensive about any females raised in the American culture, to be honest. And I'm so tired of the "I'm busy listening to something on my telephone earpods, don't bother me with a real human interaction" vibe you get from most of them. I think as our culture gets more and more dysfunctional, women just won't know how to respond to a stranger asking them questions, joking, etc. They are used to being in complete control of everything, from their thermostat to entertainment, being activated by them when they are ready for it with a wave of their finger over the smartphone screen, and anything else is scary and uncomfortable for them. At least at the farmers market, they are already in a weird "unique" environment and therefore maybe susceptible to something else out of the ordinary, like meeting someone new, whereas in the grocery its a routine thing, they want to get in, get their diet sodas and ice cream, and get out while watching their tiktoks.
 

Coja Petrus Uscan

Crow
Orthodox Inquirer
Gold Member
This appears like it may be the first study to outline what many have observed.


Trends in Frequency of Sexual Activity and Number of Sexual Partners Among Adults Aged 18 to 44 Years in the US, 2000-2018​


The study population included 4291 men and 5213 women in the analysis of sexual frequency and 4372 men and 5377 women in the analysis... Between 2000-2002 and 2016-2018, the proportion of 18- to 24-year-old individuals who reported having had no sexual activity in the past year increased among men (18.9% vs 30.9%...) but not among women (15.1% vs 19.1%; ...). Smaller absolute increases in sexual inactivity were observed among those aged 25 to 34 years for both men (7.0% vs 14.1%) and women (7.0% vs 12.6%) but not among those aged 35 to 44 years. The increase in sexual inactivity coincided with decreases in the proportion reporting weekly or more sexual frequency (men aged 18-24 years: 51.8% vs. 37.4%; men aged 25-34 years: 65.3% vs 50.3%; women aged 25-34 years: 66.4% vs. 54.2%) or 1 sexual partner (men aged 18-24 years: 44.2% vs. 30.0%; women aged 25-34 years: 79.6% vs 72.7%; and occurred mainly among unmarried men (unmarried men aged 18-44 years: 16.2% vs 24.4%). Among married men and women, weekly or more sexual frequency decreased (men: 71.1 % vs 57.7%; women: 69.1% vs 60.9%). Men with lower income and with part-time and no employment were more likely to be sexually inactive, as were men and women who were students.

In the total age range, sexual inactivity among men increased from 9.5% in 2000-2002 to 16.5% in 2016-2018, with most of the increase occurring between 2008-2010 and 2012-2014 [great financial crash].

Decreases were observed in the proportion reporting weekly or more sexual activity (60.4% in 2000-2002 vs 46.7% in 2016-2018) and those reporting 1 sexual partner (64.3% vs 57.5%).

The absolute increase in sexual inactivity was most pronounced among men aged 18 to 24 years.

In men aged 35 to 44 years, sexual inactivity was largely unchanged during the study period, whereas a sexual frequency of 1 to 3 times per month increased slightly.

Among women, the distribution of sexual activity in the total age range remained stable during the study period. When analyzed by age group, sexual inactivity increased among women aged 25 to 34 (7.0% vs 12.6%), which coincided with a decrease in weekly or more sexual activity (66.4% vs 54.2%). There was a trend toward an increase in the proportion of individuals reporting 3 or more partners (5.0% vs 7.1%), which was driven by women aged 25 to 34 years (3.5% vs 7.3%).

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Comments to follow...
 

Coja Petrus Uscan

Crow
Orthodox Inquirer
Gold Member
The sexual rebellion of the 60s onwards opened up the sexual marketplace dramatically. It appears that a broad range of people obtained access to several sexual partners, before entering marriage with about a 50% chance of divorce.

This is consistent with patreo distribution. If you play a game of material stakes, winners emerge after time, who take up much of the material distribution.

This is also consistent with satanic temptation, in which you are first offered something appealing to blind you into decline. This also consists of what I consider to be a satanic ritual of many people suffering for the temporal pleasure of a few. Most men and women are engaging in the sexual marketplace, if only as a angry bystander. They sacrifice their life and spirit to particulate - the result of which an ever decreasing number of men get to engage in fornication and an ever increasing number of women know what it is to be discarded. The lower are sacrificed for the higher, while all pave the road to hell.

This has likely been compounded by worsening economic circumstances and increasing materialism since the 1960s. People could still have a family of 14 people with the sole wage of a male labourer; if they lived in the same conditions as they did in 1800 - no electricity, multiple children in a bed, no running water, few clothes, growing your own food. Likewise we could still have a fertility rate of 2.4 children if people lived with the same material goods as they did in 1965.

The data shows that men with higher salaries are considerably less sexless. The deteriorating economics (particularly since 2008) and increased materialism makes fewer and fewer men desirable. Women are clearly interested in social status and dominance (sexual attraction) and money (long-term relationships). At the higher ends of those spectrums, they are less likely to manifest in the same male, as they are rare traits. Hence the increasing trends of cuckoldry, polyamory, infidelity etc.

The data clearly shows that women have a preference for one partner, particularly as they get older. The talk of hook up culture, female promiscuity and one night stands is clearly a small subset that a lot of red-pill people inflate and the media only reports on from a liberal female perspective. The materialist female dating strategy is to lock down one higher status, higher income male. The vast majority of women are pursuing this.

Meanwhile, the male strategy (or rather desire) is just to fornicate with as many women as he can. Most would peruse this if they could, but women will not enable it (for them). Thus a small number of the ballpark of the highest status, highest earning men are engaging with multiple partners, displacing something in the region of 30% of young men from relationships.

The above data suggests that about 60% of sex/fornication among 18-24 year old men is allotted to players. That is inverted for 25-34 year old men. The 20/80 rule is really a sliding scale, but it's about right. Being generally seen as a top 20% male will gain you access to multiple partners.

The data also shows that people are paring off increasingly later in life, while the years that should be used to build the foundation of their life are waste in incel anger, relationships they will leave if they get a chance for more/better fornication, or chasing multiple women (for men); or dispensing fornication to a man in the hopes to lock him down mixed with a few pumps and dumps (for women).

I don't think there is any way out of this other than a top-down imposition from a real authority. If this behaviour is socially and legally permitted there is nothing that can stop it. The past society now wears thin, simply because some men wanted to have more sex and some women were duped into thinking this is good or a vehicle for monkey branching. We have passed the point where enough people who thought this was a good thing, to the point of decay - to a point where people will increasingly be able to see this does not benefit them, even if they wish to remain as a complete materialist. I have been telling people things of this nature for years, often sharply rejected. But as they experience the society their sexual desire has created - broad disinterest from women, Tinder famine - they are coming around. Not because they are noble or benefit from grace, but because they want sex. Such content often involved some screeching, but the seeds must be sown on this topic. It is one of the primary vectors which can be pushed back on.

This is a completely materialist arrangement and is reminiscent of pagan societies, who we increasingly resemble. It's one more step back to the realm of animals who the pagans worshipped.
 
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Bamboozler

Pigeon
This is also consistent with satanic temptation, in which you are first offered something appealing to blind you into decline. This also consists of what I consider to be a satanic ritual of many people suffering for the temporal pleasure of a few. Most men and women are engaging in the sexual marketplace, if only as a angry bystander. They sacrifice their life and spirit to particulate - the result of which an ever decreasing number of men get to engage in fornication and an ever increasing number of women know what it is to be discarded. The lower are sacrificed for the higher, while all pave the road to hell.
In my eyes, it's a very sobering perspective. In a sense, everyone's expected to either participate or wait for their turn, which may or may not come, but the end result's the same - everyone becomes battered and cynical, including the bystanders as you call them. There are no winners in the sexual liberation game.
 

Solitarius

Sparrow
In my eyes, it's a very sobering perspective. In a sense, everyone's expected to either participate or wait for their turn, which may or may not come, but the end result's the same - everyone becomes battered and cynical, including the bystanders as you call them. There are no winners in the sexual liberation game.
Not quite true; (((they))) & their father the devil win.
 

Blade Runner

Ostrich
Orthodox
The past society now wears thin, simply because some men wanted to have more sex and some women were duped into thinking this is good or a vehicle for monkey branching.
Yes, this is the origin of things.

I don't think there is any way out of this other than a top-down imposition from a real authority.
I also agree, as I think the empirical data shows that the only other possibility would be the material drying up for women, but apparently that has shown (worsening economic situations) to propel more women into semi-pro status or the like, rather than family formation like in times of old. I suppose the reason is, once again, cultural, which is why "top-down" likely is the only answer - as you suggest.
 

02Hero

Sparrow
Reading some of these posts make me realize that dating in The Netherlands is quite similar to the US. Maybe a bit less bad, but still quite bad.

I had a lot of success as a young guy when Tinder first came out. I also learned pick up later in my early 20s which taught me how to flirt and deal with women. I think it was helpful. But I have always noticed majority of women was a pain to deal with and actually garbage human beings. With here and there a girl who actually an OK human to be around.

Always had the best experience with girls I met in real life vs. online dating.

In the end this type of lifestyle is so useless. And it left me with crap health (from all the drinking, drugs, partying, etc.). In the end the only thing I have is experience. It has not created anything. No children, nothing. So it is empty. Pleasure. It is quite depressing but a normal phenomanon in modern world. Even that experience is not that important in my opinion. There is a threshold where you have enough experience for it to improve your life. And even that is questionable.

Of course it can add to your stories and character. But that type of stuff is only valued in those type of circles. Kind of stupid. Stories are like the past, it is gone anyways. There is nothing you have now.
 
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