Correct me if I'm wrong, but you seem to be saying that not only does it make sense for me not to want to "move on," but it would actually be wrong for me to walk away and forget about her.Leonard D Neubache said:Marriage is not a matter of convenience where you get to wreck a life and then simply walk away for your next do-over.
If she hasn't "moved on" (no such thing really) and neither has he then there is obviously more at play than the mere post-modern inconvenience of filing for divorce.
That's good to hear, considering most of the "normies" (IRL and on the internet) tend to say the opposite.
"Let her be happy."
"You're just heartbroken. You'll meet someone better than her and you'll forget all about her."
"We've all had break ups but we get over it. The fact that you can't or won't get over it means you're not really in love, you're just obsessed."
That's not to say the way I've been going about it has been correct (it hasn't). But at least I don't have to feel like I'm crazy trying to explain to people why I can't just forget about this.
Other people have also told me this and I suppose you're right.Aurini said:...
You need to willingly let go of her, and fix your issues, if there's to be any hope of you getting her - or any woman - back into your life.
It's just a lot easier said than done. It just feels like the longer that goes by without being in contact with her, or seeing her in person, the harder it will be to get back in contact.
One of my closest friends once said to me "The longer you guys are apart, she will become more and more sure of herself in her decision to leave you, and she will be more and more likely to date other men."
Maybe, as Leonard said, these worries are just the Devil's way of getting me not to improve myself. But the realities are hard to ignore. If I were to disappear into a hole for, say, 2 years in order to really improve myself, and 2 years from now I were to reemerge and contact my wife, I doubt she would be available. As much as she loves me and is bound to me, if that much time were to go with no contact (or very little contact), she would simply have to move on with her life.