My younger brother just passed away
- Thread starter Optimus Princeps
- Start date
Jetset
Ostrich
Really sorry for the loss of your brother.
I know from experience that there's not a lot anyone can say to you that will make sense of it, so just know that people are thinking of you and your brother and that we hope you're remembering to take care of yourself as well as you're taking care of your loved ones.
I know from experience that there's not a lot anyone can say to you that will make sense of it, so just know that people are thinking of you and your brother and that we hope you're remembering to take care of yourself as well as you're taking care of your loved ones.
TheDr3amer
Chicken
I would advise against taking time off.
If you have a lot of free time, depression grows even more upon you and then it might become crippling. I'm talking from experience here.
Let the grief process itself but don't make accommodations for it. I think it's much better to keep yourself occupied.
If you have a lot of free time, depression grows even more upon you and then it might become crippling. I'm talking from experience here.
Let the grief process itself but don't make accommodations for it. I think it's much better to keep yourself occupied.
Terribly sorry my man.
If I took one thing from your passage that struck me, you mentioned that your parents were never there for him. I see parents main job as being that rock, those only people in your life that you can 100% count on to sacrifice anything for you. Too often parents give conditional love only, and as a result, your emotional growth is stunted. You rely on thew wrong things when things go tough, such as a girlfriend or drugs.
I would hold them somewhat accountable for this.
If I took one thing from your passage that struck me, you mentioned that your parents were never there for him. I see parents main job as being that rock, those only people in your life that you can 100% count on to sacrifice anything for you. Too often parents give conditional love only, and as a result, your emotional growth is stunted. You rely on thew wrong things when things go tough, such as a girlfriend or drugs.
I would hold them somewhat accountable for this.
Right now you are in that numb state of pain and nothing anyone says here will change that.
Not trying to hurt your feelings, but I'll give my perspective: We're some evolved apes on a blue rock hurling through the void at many thousands of miles per hour, an accident of the universe. Nothing is watching over us, and this void constantly tries to kill anyone who isn't strong enough. Natural selection. Nature/universe doesn't give a fuck who lives or dies, or what happens. It's all pointless to the void. You can do something totally amazing, or fucked-up, or evil, and the universe will be like "so what?"
Ok that probably depressed you even more, but my point is if he wasn't strong enough even with your help, there was nothing you could do. Not your fault
Not trying to hurt your feelings, but I'll give my perspective: We're some evolved apes on a blue rock hurling through the void at many thousands of miles per hour, an accident of the universe. Nothing is watching over us, and this void constantly tries to kill anyone who isn't strong enough. Natural selection. Nature/universe doesn't give a fuck who lives or dies, or what happens. It's all pointless to the void. You can do something totally amazing, or fucked-up, or evil, and the universe will be like "so what?"
Ok that probably depressed you even more, but my point is if he wasn't strong enough even with your help, there was nothing you could do. Not your fault
MovingForward2050
Pelican
I hope you are feeling somewhat better at this point. I believe that one day you and your brother will be reunited in the next world.
My best to you...
My best to you...
Optimus Princeps
Woodpecker
Thank you, it was the hardest thing I've ever had to go through and I still think about him everyday, but as time goes on I continue to be healed. It took about 6 months for the nightmares to stop, and I do believe I had "PTSD" for around that long as well. I did take everyone ITT's advice and saw a therapist weekly for a few months, and it definitely helped immensely even though I was skeptical at first.
I do on occasion now have dreams where I'm reunited with him and we embrace and are both crying, seemingly almost like he's visiting me in my dream. While my girlfriend and I just broke up and I'm sort of down about that, I'm overall doing very well, am committed firmly to my faith in Jesus and just started law school 4 weeks ago.
Good for you, man. God bless and good luck with law school (Been there, done that, got the t-shirt).