Need help examining behavior of Russian/Ukrainian women and their potential as a long-term partner

Marco B.

Chicken
This is the same everywhere, by degrees. Ultimately a normal 31 year old guy with a 20 year old 9, will only be able to maintain that relationship through leverage, be it finance, lifestyle or high social status.

I guess that period of time (late 90s with EE women) inflated things a bit, but it just underlines the fact that you shouldnt try to artificially go far beyond your own SMV, at least for long term relationships.

You are actually right. I am aware of that. But our "relationship" worked "somehow" for three months.
I can assure that back then (from 1995 till 2010) my own SMV was also pretty high.It was very easy for me getting dates and more.
Back then i accepted a certain degree of outrageousness from this ukrainian girl.But when she demanded to spend every weekend
150 euro/dollars she definitely went too far.It was definitely ME who dumped her.I was really fed up with her.
I was slightly in love with her, therefore it was difficult for me to end this relationship much sooner, although she displayed that much
impertinence/ red flags.It took some months for me to recover.I was rarely in love with someone, therefore i sometimes still think about this story.I still have her pictures.
 

Blade Runner

Ostrich
Orthodox
I guess that period of time (late 90s with EE women) inflated things a bit, but it just underlines the fact that you shouldnt try to artificially go far beyond your own SMV, at least for long term relationships.
On pure numbers what discrepancy (SMV) do you suggest "gets dangerous"? Anything over 1 point difference? 2?
 

mehdreamer

Sparrow
After EXTENSIVE research into this topic I have come to the conclusion that FSU women are to be avoided for serious relations.
This is also my impression...

Unless, like someone said earlier in this thread, you live in her country for 5+ years and learn to speak her language fluently and attend the same church..which is a combination very hard to achieve as I don't see someone 40 yo+ well established in a western country dropping everything and moving to Russia. I mean just having a work Visa in Russia is extremely painfull, let alone finding a decent job and learning a language quickly enough to be able to have deep and intimate conversations..

The next best option is still to try to find a good wife locally and live/adapt with all the tradeoffs that come with..
Otherwise, I see no other options than embracing celibacy and focusing on other aspects of life.
 

Blade Runner

Ostrich
Orthodox
I feel like Romania, Bulgaria or the neighboring countries of this sort are actually better ... the problem is that right now Europe looks like a geopolitical nightmare waiting to happen, if energy costs don't bring it down even faster.
 
So - I have been in contact with a Russian lady a few years younger than myself for a few years now. We've video chatted several times over the years and get along well. She's interesting (a journalist for several big-name online pages), average in appearance (for Russia) and wants kids one day.

A few red flags is she was previously married (no kids - the marriage lasted a year), and seems to have lots of male friends.

I'm turning 30 this year - I make good money and work 3 weeks on 3 off at a mine as a heavy duty mechanic. So I'm in a situation - that covid dependent - I could have a theoretical relationship overseas where most people couldn't.
 

Marco B.

Chicken
Warning! Russian women!!
Few weeks ago i posted my horrific experience which i had more than 20 years ago when i met an 20 year old ukranian golddigger.(here in germany)
Yesterday i had a date with a 41 year old russian woman.Actually i met her online two weeks ago.We were talking a lot on the phone
and yesterday she finally had some time for a date.(She has a nice feminin voice, long brunette hair and a nice body.She looks much younger.On my scale still a 7 though already 41 years old.But her german is only soso)
I dressed well, got a new haircut and used a good perfume.
So when we met yesterday i told her that i arrived by train to our meeting point, because its much faster (10 minutes) than using the car during the rush hour (45 minutes).I explained that its difficult to find parking spots and that they are very expensive in the city centre.
She replied very direct and boldly: "You look like a poor guy...I dont think you have a lot of money, if you prefer to use a train IF parking spots are SOO EXPENSIVE for you". I said "Wait a minute. What did you say??Are serious? "
She " Yes, i am.So what do you exactly for for living.Explain it"
Me " I am salesman and i am satisfied with my income" (Real estates business)
She " So how much did you sell this year? "
Me: " Enough. I told you already.The last winter 2020 was actually not great, but March till October 2021 was extraordinary good. I cant complain"
She : So let me hear some numbers...! How much in February, March, April and so on...? Lets sum up"
Then she EVEN PULLED OUT HER SMARTPHONE to use the calculator.....!!!!! Her behaviour became very cold, agressive and bold.No emotions.
She wasnt the same nice person as on the phone before.
At first I was very surprised, disappointed and speechless.At this moment i realised that she was indead a golddigger.So i quickly decided
to fool her (actually to lie) about the numbers. So i gave her some fantasy numbers.She didnt fully understand the german language and what i said to her.Therefore she misinterpreted the numbers.She used the calculator and said " Thats much more than 6 figures salary".
I said " Yes, thats correct....................
Then she became much friendlier and agreed to meet again next week.She shaked my hand very long and even drove me to the
train station.I texted her today that i will call her tomorrow.She replied "Great!"
If i meet her again...then its okay...i will try to get her in bed as soon as possible..nothing else. I will not spend any money or buy her any expensive gifts like a beta fool.If she starts playing any (expensive) games i will dump her as soon as possible.
 
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MartyMcFly

Woodpecker
Warning! Russian women!!
Few weeks ago i posted my horrific experience which i had more than 20 years ago when i met an 20 year old ukranian golddigger.(here in germany)
Yesterday i had a date with a 41 year old russian woman.Actually i met her online two weeks ago.We were talking a lot on the phone
and yesterday she finally had some time for a date.(She has a nice feminin voice, long brunette hair and a nice body.She looks much younger.On my scale still a 7 though already 41 years old.But her german is only soso)
I dressed well, got a new haircut and used a good perfume.
So when we met yesterday i told her that i arrived by train to our meeting point, because its much faster (10 minutes) than using the car during the rush hour (45 minutes).I explained that its difficult to find parking spots and that they are very expensive in the city centre.
She replied very direct and boldly: "You look like a poor guy...I dont think you have a lot of money, if you prefer to use a train IF parking spots are SOO EXPENSIVE for you". I said "Wait a minute. What did you say??Are serious? "
She " Yes, i am.So what do you exactly for for living.Explain it"
Me " I am salesman and i am satisfied with my income" (Real estates business)
She " So how much did you sell this year? "
Me: " Enough. I told you already.The last winter 2020 was actually not great, but March till October 2021 was extraordinary good. I cant complain"
She : So let me hear some numbers...! How much in February, March, April and so on...? Lets sum up"
Then she EVEN PULLED OUT HER SMARTPHONE to use the calculator.....!!!!! Her behaviour became very cold, agressive and bold.No emotions.
She wasnt the same nice person as on the phone before.
At first I was very surprised, disappointed and speechless.At this moment i realised that she was indead a golddigger.So i quickly decided
to fool her (actually to lie) about the numbers. So i gave her some fantasy numbers.She didnt fully understand the german language and what i said to her.Therefore she misinterpreted the numbers.She used the calculator and said " Thats much more than 6 figures salary".
I said " Yes, thats correct....................
Then she became much friendlier and agreed to meet again next week.She shaked my hand very long and even drove me to the
train station.I texted her today that i will call her tomorrow.She replied "Great!"
If i meet her again...then its okay...i will try to get her in bed as soon as possible..nothing else. I will not spend any money or buy her any expensive gifts like a beta fool.If she starts playing any (expensive) games i will dump her as soon as possible.
Her attitude explains why she is attractive and still single at age 41. At least she showed she is a gold digger fast.
 
You are actually right. I am aware of that. But our "relationship" worked "somehow" for three months.
I can assure that back then (from 1995 till 2010) my own SMV was also pretty high.It was very easy for me getting dates and more.
Back then i accepted a certain degree of outrageousness from this ukrainian girl.But when she demanded to spend every weekend
150 euro/dollars she definitely went too far.It was definitely ME who dumped her.I was really fed up with her.
I was slightly in love with her, therefore it was difficult for me to end this relationship much sooner, although she displayed that much
impertinence/ red flags.It took some months for me to recover.I was rarely in love with someone, therefore i sometimes still think about this story.I still have her pictures.
Burn those pictures, man.
 

Marco B.

Chicken
Her attitude explains why she is attractive and still single at age 41. At least she showed she is a gold digger fast.
Yes, indead.She showed it very fast..already after 10 minutes.When she was sitting next to me and pointed her calculator to me in order to sum up my "worth"... It was almost a traumatic experience for me when this woman treated me so blatantly like a ATM.That night i even struggled to
fall asleep. The dating scene is messed up beyond belief.That was definitely a new lowpoint in my dating-life.
At least i am now much more aware how the mind of a golddigger works: They observe how you spend your own money.If the guy is thrifty or stingy and doesnt like to spend money for unnecessary stuff ( for example to pay 15 Euro/Dollars for a parking spot), that means he is either poor or not suitable as her new victim.If he displays that he doesnt care to waste any money for useless crap or a woman - that means HE IS suitable as her new victim.
 
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MartyMcFly

Woodpecker
Yes, indead.She showed it very fast..already after 10 minutes.When she was sitting next to me and pointed her calculator to me in order to sum up my "worth"... It was almost a traumatic experience for me when this woman treated me so blatantly like a ATM.That night i even struggled to
fall asleep. The dating scene is messed up beyond belief.That was definitely a new lowpoint in my dating-life.
At least i am now much more aware how the mind of a golddigger works: They observe how you spend your own money.If the guy is thrifty or stingy and doesnt like to spend money for unnecessary stuff ( for example to pay 15 Euro/Dollars for a parking spot), that means he is either poor or not suitable as her new victim.If he displays that he doesnt care to waste any money for useless crap or a woman - that means HE IS suitable as her new victim.
You could have told her it is because you care about mother Earth and want to reduce your carbon footprint. If she is a leftist, she couldn't argue against this and might actually like you more.
 

Parmesan

Woodpecker
Yes, indead.She showed it very fast..already after 10 minutes.When she was sitting next to me and pointed her calculator to me in order to sum up my "worth"... It was almost a traumatic experience for me when this woman treated me so blatantly like a ATM.That night i even struggled to
fall asleep. The dating scene is messed up beyond belief.That was definitely a new lowpoint in my dating-life.
At least i am now much more aware how the mind of a golddigger works: They observe how you spend your own money.If the guy is thrifty or stingy and doesnt like to spend money for unnecessary stuff ( for example to pay 15 Euro/Dollars for a parking spot), that means he is either poor or not suitable as her new victim.If he displays that he doesnt care to waste any money for useless crap or a woman - that means HE IS suitable as her new victim.
Part of me has a certain respect for women like this, at least they are up front to themselves and others about who they are. She tested you, you failed, everybody moves on. A typical western woman will essentially do the same thing, except it will be slow, subtle burn of tests and prodding over months and years until you are neck deep in debt from homes, cars, furniture, vacations, and more.
 

MartyMcFly

Woodpecker
Part of me has a certain respect for women like this, at least they are up front to themselves and others about who they are. She tested you, you failed, everybody moves on. A typical western woman will essentially do the same thing, except it will be slow, subtle burn of tests and prodding over months and years until you are neck deep in debt from homes, cars, furniture, vacations, and more.
What is crazy is that hundreds of men would likely fight hard to win such a woman as long as she is not ugly (and even if she is ugly, some men would still fight for her). I don't see much of a difference between this woman and a prostitute except possibly number of 'relationship' partners. I do agree with you that at least she is direct that her affection must be bought.
 

Parmesan

Woodpecker
What is crazy is that hundreds of men would likely fight hard to win such a woman as long as she is not ugly (and even if she is ugly, some men would still fight for her). I don't see much of a difference between this woman and a prostitute except possibly number of 'relationship' partners. I do agree with you that at least she is direct that her affection must be bought.
What I’m curious about, if you married a woman like this or stayed long term, do you get to a point where she is no longer testing your limits and analyzing your behavior?
 

MartyMcFly

Woodpecker
What I’m curious about, if you married a woman like this or stayed long term, do you get to a point where she is no longer testing your limits and analyzing your behavior?
Doubtful. I am no expert but I think if you gave in to her demands, she might marry you but won't respect you and will keep expecting you to cave in. Of course, if you lived in a nation where divorce is frowned on and/or illegal, you could say 'gotcha' and refuse to cave in and she would be stuck and as long as you are reasonable, she might accept her fate and behave better after pouting for awhile. In the USA, she would likely divorce rape you once you stopped caving into her demands.

I think the 'Taming of the Shrew' story has a lot of truth in it.
 
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