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Need life advice - very bad situation
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<blockquote data-quote="lonewolf1968" data-source="post: 1567118" data-attributes="member: 12244"><p>Hi,</p><p></p><p>I can relate with a lot of the emotions that are coming through your post. I've experienced depression since I was 13 for around 10 years more or less. I'll try to keep my advice simple and focused. Hope it's helpful.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>First thing you need to do is change that language about you being a complete loser. You're a troubled individual but if you convince yourself you're a loser you already lost. Change the language you use when you refer about yourself. For instance: ''I've been a loser my entire life but I'm going to fight and that's going to change'' If you believe in God you must know that there's Good in yourself that's worth fighting for. We are Men and we must FIGHT. Whether that is in the physical, spiritual, mental realm.</p><p></p><p>Also, positive things, You have a Canadian Passport!, I wish my passport allowed me to travel to most of the world without a Visa being required. Unfortunately, no. I'm a latino and my options are limited. You can start working on a plan about leaving Canada if you hate it so much. I hate a lot of things about my country and the people here, and would definitely leave if I had the chance, but for the time being, there's nothing I can do. I have to fight, here. For years I was so frustrated by this I changed the day I accepted it and started to enjoy what's good in here.</p><p></p><p>My Mom and dad are not Christian, they never married, never loved each other. Both cheated on each other, both hated each other. I judged them and hated them for years, hated them for bringing me into this world. But then I realised, they are also human beings just like me, they were broken by the hardships of life, pain, failure. How hard was their upbringing, what are their frustrations, their pains, their inner demons, tbh i didn't know it. How their relationship affected you, that's that, but now you must know that you need to take control, 'cause you're young and time flies and they will not save you. As another poster stated, Forgive them, pray and let all grudge go away. You say you don't hold anything against them, but the way you express about them says otherwise. Lastly, I hated school, trust me I know what a Getto latino school looks like. But school is gone, i'm not longer there. It's over.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>This is what you need to focus on after tweaking your mindset. Eat healthy, read about your medical condition, if it is not incapacitating you can treat it. I've also been troubled by disease. Specially one year of neurological problems that seemed to indicate ALS but thank GOD it wasn't. I now have Colon issues due to my diet. I changed it. Be logical and try to tackle your problems. One by one. If narcolepsy is a big problem, embrace it like a man. There must be ways to treat it. I also have something called geographical tongue, I thought I had cancer. One of my kidneys is weird so I had issues with infections on and off. Were they stressfull? Yes, Were they treateable? Yes. Ask yourself the same thing. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Do they sell fruits, vegetables and lean meats in Walmart? or do you buy the junk food because you're lazy and you don't want to commit to improving your eating habits. If you parents provide you with an apartment in the middle of nowhere, BE THANKFUL!, imagine being a homeless person, or having to provide for yourself. I'm thirty and I have never touched a Car, I can't afford a car, neither did my family. They are broke, I basically provide for mom and dad cause they are unemployed and we have 0 benefits from the government. About the ugliness, well, unless you're really short, have disfigurement and are balding I'd say it may be in you're head as a result of the whole depression. Even if you were, you could work on that as well!. I also thought I was the ugliest being alive, it turned out when I changed all of those things women were attracted to me. You'll get a girlfriend once you fix the other stuff and put the work.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Well, You've seen yourself in a deteriorating condition for the past 5-8 years, and you are fully aware of it, and yet have done nothing to stop it. Stop putting blame on others. You need to own your problems and FIGHT.</p><p></p><p>On the killing yourself thing, I know what it feels like, I used to visit a suicide support chat and also went to the shrink for around 5 years. But, are you really going to give up? Unless you have a really serious life-threatening condition as ALS or a really scary cancer, do you really think you have such a problem that justifies taking your own life? May not be a really orthodox thing to do but I suggest checking this story about <a href="https://nypost.com/2017/07/07/cancer-eats-half-of-mans-face/" target="_blank">this guy</a> with Face cancer to see what a real problem is, I can imagine this guy saying he needs to end his own suffering. As for your case it seems to me all your problems have a solution, it won't be easy, but you can do it. Also, Thank GOD every day, and love your parents. Honor them. I can't think of anything else. Cheers dude.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lonewolf1968, post: 1567118, member: 12244"] Hi, I can relate with a lot of the emotions that are coming through your post. I've experienced depression since I was 13 for around 10 years more or less. I'll try to keep my advice simple and focused. Hope it's helpful. First thing you need to do is change that language about you being a complete loser. You're a troubled individual but if you convince yourself you're a loser you already lost. Change the language you use when you refer about yourself. For instance: ''I've been a loser my entire life but I'm going to fight and that's going to change'' If you believe in God you must know that there's Good in yourself that's worth fighting for. We are Men and we must FIGHT. Whether that is in the physical, spiritual, mental realm. Also, positive things, You have a Canadian Passport!, I wish my passport allowed me to travel to most of the world without a Visa being required. Unfortunately, no. I'm a latino and my options are limited. You can start working on a plan about leaving Canada if you hate it so much. I hate a lot of things about my country and the people here, and would definitely leave if I had the chance, but for the time being, there's nothing I can do. I have to fight, here. For years I was so frustrated by this I changed the day I accepted it and started to enjoy what's good in here. My Mom and dad are not Christian, they never married, never loved each other. Both cheated on each other, both hated each other. I judged them and hated them for years, hated them for bringing me into this world. But then I realised, they are also human beings just like me, they were broken by the hardships of life, pain, failure. How hard was their upbringing, what are their frustrations, their pains, their inner demons, tbh i didn't know it. How their relationship affected you, that's that, but now you must know that you need to take control, 'cause you're young and time flies and they will not save you. As another poster stated, Forgive them, pray and let all grudge go away. You say you don't hold anything against them, but the way you express about them says otherwise. Lastly, I hated school, trust me I know what a Getto latino school looks like. But school is gone, i'm not longer there. It's over. This is what you need to focus on after tweaking your mindset. Eat healthy, read about your medical condition, if it is not incapacitating you can treat it. I've also been troubled by disease. Specially one year of neurological problems that seemed to indicate ALS but thank GOD it wasn't. I now have Colon issues due to my diet. I changed it. Be logical and try to tackle your problems. One by one. If narcolepsy is a big problem, embrace it like a man. There must be ways to treat it. I also have something called geographical tongue, I thought I had cancer. One of my kidneys is weird so I had issues with infections on and off. Were they stressfull? Yes, Were they treateable? Yes. Ask yourself the same thing. Do they sell fruits, vegetables and lean meats in Walmart? or do you buy the junk food because you're lazy and you don't want to commit to improving your eating habits. If you parents provide you with an apartment in the middle of nowhere, BE THANKFUL!, imagine being a homeless person, or having to provide for yourself. I'm thirty and I have never touched a Car, I can't afford a car, neither did my family. They are broke, I basically provide for mom and dad cause they are unemployed and we have 0 benefits from the government. About the ugliness, well, unless you're really short, have disfigurement and are balding I'd say it may be in you're head as a result of the whole depression. Even if you were, you could work on that as well!. I also thought I was the ugliest being alive, it turned out when I changed all of those things women were attracted to me. You'll get a girlfriend once you fix the other stuff and put the work. Well, You've seen yourself in a deteriorating condition for the past 5-8 years, and you are fully aware of it, and yet have done nothing to stop it. Stop putting blame on others. You need to own your problems and FIGHT. On the killing yourself thing, I know what it feels like, I used to visit a suicide support chat and also went to the shrink for around 5 years. But, are you really going to give up? Unless you have a really serious life-threatening condition as ALS or a really scary cancer, do you really think you have such a problem that justifies taking your own life? May not be a really orthodox thing to do but I suggest checking this story about [URL='https://nypost.com/2017/07/07/cancer-eats-half-of-mans-face/']this guy[/URL] with Face cancer to see what a real problem is, I can imagine this guy saying he needs to end his own suffering. As for your case it seems to me all your problems have a solution, it won't be easy, but you can do it. Also, Thank GOD every day, and love your parents. Honor them. I can't think of anything else. Cheers dude. [/QUOTE]
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