Older Guys (40+)

Going strong

Crow
Trad Catholic
Gold Member
My friend, may I ask if you believe in God?

I'm 46, two failed marriages, and had come to terms with finishing my life alone.

I prayed to God that if it was His will that I live alone, then I'd do the best I could to serve Him in that position.

Without writing a novel here, I'll tell you that the Holy Spirit overwhelmingly directed me to Vietnam. I met my fiancée in a place I never thought possible. We have an 8 month old son that has given me purpose. My fiancée is a devoted Christian, knows the truth about this world, submissive, and dedicated to her role in the hierarchy.

While I led her in sin by having premarital sex (I've repented and will not have intercourse again until married), there is no denying the gifts that the Lord has blessed me with. I had a hard time with having a mixed child, but he's a beautiful boy.

I understand the difficulty finding a good woman in the west and I'm handsome and workout daily. I found that I couldn't connect with many western women on the inside. Thats really where it matters imo.

Don't give up. Pray
You were "46 and single and wanting to find a good submissive wife" , and "the Holy Spirit" urgently sent you to Vietnam??

Well, seems like the "Holy Spirit" has played it safe and wisely with you. For Vietnam/Phils it had to be, indeed.
 
You were "46 and single and wanting to find a good submissive wife" , and "the Holy Spirit" urgently sent you to Vietnam??

Well, seems like the "Holy Spirit" has played it safe and wisely with you. For Vietnam/Phils it had to be, indeed.

I've heard so many stories about Vietnamese women over there being extremely unfaithful to their partners, and essentially, prostitutes for hire. And even the educated and middle class women being that way! And so I am very happy for you finding a good one.

My partner's company sent a work group over to Vietnam, and they were shocked by how attractive women of almost all socio-economic backgrounds hit on them for money.
 

Going strong

Crow
Trad Catholic
Gold Member
I've heard so many stories about Vietnamese women being extremely unfaithful to their partners, and essentially, prostitutes for hire. And even the educated and middle class are that way.

Replace in the sentence above, "Vietnamese women"with "women educated in the West and posting on Instagram".

I mean, as if Vietnamese women, in general, were more corrupted than Western women... I contend that Western women are, obviously, the most decadent, slutty, vain, rude, Godless and useless creatures, by far, generally speaking and barring a few exceptions.
 

Solitarius

Sparrow
Women are treacherous the world over, you'll always be taking a terrible chance with them. I like to compare marrying one to the following scenario; imagine that there is a man standing in front of you, he's got a double-barrelled 10 bore shotgun with both hammers cocked pointed at your guts. He tells you that the cartridge in one barrel is harmless, it is loaded with gold dust but has no primer or powder, the other however has primer, powder & buckshot. Your invited to guess which barrel has the gold dust, left or right. Whichever barrel you choose will have its trigger pulled at once, if you guessed right you get the gold dust, if not your guts are splattered all over the wall behind you. Perhaps it'd help to flip a coin ha ha.
 

Going strong

Crow
Trad Catholic
Gold Member
Women are treacherous the world over, you'll always be taking a terrible chance with them. I like to compare marrying one to the following scenario; imagine that there is a man standing in front of you, he's got a double-barrelled 10 bore shotgun with both hammers cocked pointed at your guts. He tells you that the cartridge in one barrel is harmless, it is loaded with gold dust but has no primer or powder, the other however has primer, powder & buckshot. Your invited to guess which barrel has the gold dust, left or right. Whichever barrel you choose will have its trigger pulled at once, if you guessed right you get the gold dust, if not your guts are splattered all over the wall behind you. Perhaps it'd help to flip a coin ha ha.
That's exactly the situation, except the guy with the shotgun will shot both barrels at you, whatever you've chosen. So you'll get some smattering of gold but you'll also get the lead, guaranteed, if you marry a "modern" Instagram woman in a wealthy country.

Depending on which one travels faster in the air, gold grains or lead pellets, you'll get a moment of joy, though, maybe. But the lead is coming, Instagram/Facebook have made sure of this.
 

Blade Runner

Ostrich
Orthodox
The sad truths. I look at those attention whore models/posters occasionally and wonder if they ever think about their own future, or is it that they don't ever consider that they'll look differently in the future, and they aren't actually doing anything of substance. Beyond that, is it that they think fleeting sexual desire/seduction will attract a mate that treats them as anything BUT an object? Do they not understand that if you don't DO anything to help or complement a man, he will never see you as anything but that? I'm sadly guessing they never spend time thinking about any of this.
 
The sad truths. I look at those attention whore models/posters occasionally and wonder if they ever think about their own future, or is it that they don't ever consider that they'll look differently in the future, and they aren't actually doing anything of substance. Beyond that, is it that they think fleeting sexual desire/seduction will attract a mate that treats them as anything BUT an object? Do they not understand that if you don't DO anything to help or complement a man, he will never see you as anything but that? I'm sadly guessing they never spend time thinking about any of this.

Worldly beautiful women in their twenties think subconsciously that they will be young forever! Lol And as nagging thoughts of reality start building, they block them out the best they can...
 

Blade Runner

Ostrich
Orthodox
Worldly beautiful women in their twenties think subconsciously that they will be young forever! Lol And as nagging thoughts of reality start building, they block them out the best they can...
It seems to be the only explanation. What's funny is that they act like they don't know what men are attracted by (their 20s) when older, not having it anymore. The lack of honesty or desire to inform other women not to fall into the same trap/foolishness is the part that bothers me the most, but I know the answer: emotion always dominates for women, not truth (unless directed properly).
 
It seems to be the only explanation. What's funny is that they act like they don't know what men are attracted by (their 20s) when older, not having it anymore. The lack of honesty or desire to inform other women not to fall into the same trap/foolishness is the part that bothers me the most, but I know the answer: emotion always dominates for women, not truth (unless directed properly).

But fortunately, there are more and more formerly feminist women, who are speaking out online about how they were deceived by the philosophy of feminism and its proponents, and had their lives ruined. I think we will see more of this as time goes by and vast numbers of women become extremely embittered.
 
I've heard so many stories about Vietnamese women over there being extremely unfaithful to their partners, and essentially, prostitutes for hire. And even the educated and middle class women being that way! And so I am very happy for you finding a good one.

My partner's company sent a work group over to Vietnam, and they were shocked by how attractive women of almost all socio-economic backgrounds hit on them for money.

Would not surprise me. There was a survey done by Durex as to which nationality was the most unfaithful. Thai women came in second in the world, after Ghana's women.

Maybe they're just more honest.

 

mehdreamer

Sparrow
I joined the 40+ club since yesterday. It feels weird because this is a symbolic cap for most men.
I didn't have a date since 2 years. My last relationship broke something in me..
I am very rusty in terms of social interactions, online dating is absolutely terrible for me and I get no matches worth interest..

10 years ago, online dating wasn't that bad for me.

I still look 30+ ish thanks to my berber genes. My hair is greying but my skin is still decent.
I have no interest for women at my age. I find women in their early twenties a bit immature and I feel no connection with them. My soft spot would be 27-33 and that's the target age I will be looking for
 
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Saxonyorbust

 
Banned
Protestant
I get about the same about of attention I do at 54 as I did at 24 and 34. Which is zero. If anything it's even less.
Same here Richard.I've never felt like any girls wanted me to approach them.Maybe its the way they are,they want men to approach them so they can feel powerful.And women/younger women feel entitled to the top tier of guys,those with status,money,looks,prowess in sports etc.I've always felt to shy to put myself out there just to be judged by the callous,mercenary female sex.If we suffer here on Earth in this regard then maybe in Heaven we will have a decent young woman,I surely hope so.I never wanted females for sex like many of my friends,I just wanted a nice decent girl to be my companion.Some of the dates I did have seemed put off that I didnt want sex with them right away and would drop me instantly.I sure don't understand this world.Its so different than my parents,grand pararents and great grandparents world.They all stayed married and loved each other and got along well.No fights,no hurtful words,just working together like God intended.This time we are in is awful indeed.
 

coldgameboy

 
Banned
Buddhist / Eastern
Same here Richard.I've never felt like any girls wanted me to approach them.Maybe its the way they are,they want men to approach them so they can feel powerful.And women/younger women feel entitled to the top tier of guys,those with status,money,looks,prowess in sports etc.I've always felt to shy to put myself out there just to be judged by the callous,mercenary female sex.If we suffer here on Earth in this regard then maybe in Heaven we will have a decent young woman,I surely hope so.I never wanted females for sex like many of my friends,I just wanted a nice decent girl to be my companion.Some of the dates I did have seemed put off that I didnt want sex with them right away and would drop me instantly.I sure don't understand this world.Its so different than my parents,grand pararents and great grandparents world.They all stayed married and loved each other and got along well.No fights,no hurtful words,just working together like God intended.This time we are in is awful indeed.
This reminds me of following two quotes from Roosh's "Game" book
The fact that you need to learn game as if you were studying a subject in university says that who you are is not enough to get the girls you want in a degenerate society. Your character traits, which probably include aspects of loyalty, politeness, fairness, fidelity, and justice, are not highly desired by girls who have an unbridled choice of men, and only by applying game can you unleash the type of man who will be favored in a society that’s broken.
And
Consider the type of game your grandfathers had to use on your grandmothers. In all likelihood, it was to be good men, get involved with the church, line up stable jobs, and be friendly. They didn’t have to sleep with a dozen or more girls to enter a relationship that would last less than a year. There was no conscious effort on their part to try to be an alpha male or not to appear needy. When “grandfather game” becomes the best game to land a great woman, I will be the first to get excited, but we have to admit that your grandfathers may not have reproduced today if they had been forced to meet your grandmothers in the kind of climate we have to face.
 

Uzisuicide

Kingfisher
Protestant
Gold Member
Forty or not, keep approaching. You'd be surprised what these women will do when you ask. And I'm not talking about approch for sex. Don't approach a woman you couldn't see yourself settling down with. Nothing good will fall in to your lap and by all means pray about it and be prepared to BE the right person when you meet the right person.
 

soli.deo.gloria

Woodpecker
Orthodox Inquirer
Gold Member
Add me to the club. Meeting quality women is tough at any age but as an older man (who looks and feels early 30's) I get a lot of push back from younger women and more often than not I cannot even get a response from them. In some ways I fear I waited too long to start looking and it's hopeless, but when I look back on my youth I was lazy and self-centered and definitely not the kind of man to marry and raise a family (and I never had any good opportunities, anyway). Now that I am "ready" I hope and pray that I will be able to find someone decent before it is too late. If things don't work out I may end up as a hermit monk living in a crackhouse on a mountain top somewhere.
 

Papaya

Peacock
Gold Member
On the bright side there is a severe dearth of strong capable men. Women are looking for those qualities...whether they acknowledge that consciously or not is irrelevant...its a biological fact.

There may be "fewer" worthy women as a whole but if you are only looking for one good one its irrelevant.

Now more than ever
 

MRBR1908

Sparrow
Yeah, they'll be seeking that safe harbor as we go through rough and tough times, and bide their time to get back out chasing Chad's afterward, or still do it on the side.... man I'm cynical anymore.
 

Maddox

Woodpecker
Protestant
On the bright side there is a severe dearth of strong capable men. Women are looking for those qualities...whether they acknowledge that consciously or not is irrelevant...its a biological fact.

There may be "fewer" worthy women as a whole but if you are only looking for one good one its irrelevant.

Now more than ever

This only seems to benefit the younger, alpha men. You'd think that in these screwed-up times, the younger woman would be open to dating an older man who has his stuff together. But from my experience, a 30-something beta boy who still lives at home with his parents has more appeal to them than an over 40 alpha man.
 

C-Note

Hummingbird
Other Christian
Gold Member
Add me to the club. Meeting quality women is tough at any age but as an older man (who looks and feels early 30's) I get a lot of push back from younger women and more often than not I cannot even get a response from them.
I'm surprised that some of you are encountering this because I'm noticing the complete opposite. In my experience, being in shape, having a calm, relaxed, confident demeanor, dressing in nice clothes (or at least clothes that fit well), and showing some peppery gray in your hair gets a lot of positive attention from both women and men. I'm not trying to game women (at least, not beyond casual interaction), but I will still strike up conversations with women, and men, of all ages, just for the fun of the social interaction, to keep up my social skills, and obtain information, and I almost always get a favorable reception. I've found that one of the most fun aspects of getting older (I'm in my 50s) is how much easier and pleasant it is to interact with both males and females.
 
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NoMoreTO

Hummingbird
Catholic
This only seems to benefit the younger, alpha men. You'd think that in these screwed-up times, the younger woman would be open to dating an older man who has his stuff together. But from my experience, a 30-something beta boy who still lives at home with his parents has more appeal to them than an over 40 alpha man.

I was thinking today that a man being over 40 is just a mental block for alot of younger women in our culture. The early 30s career women, and I think there might be some diamonds in the rough in there still, well they tend to be very conventional socially, and seek a man just a few years older then them. The 20s something quality girls, well it's understandable that the majority would seek a guy closer to their own age.

On the bright side, many youngers guys today have really lost track of their masculinity and their financial situation is sad (not of their own choosing). Also in many ways, generationally they are not as social as Gen X guys. On the other hand, young millenial girls on tik tok aren't really a great match for me, even the good ones.

To me the key in breaking through this barrier is simply in person contact and connection. Online isn't where it's at, that's for sure. And in person is pretty difficult these days. Like Papaya said, you just need one.
 
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