When I was single and actively searching it seems I had no problem meeting women they were just not quality women. Once I stopped caring and focusing myself to God I happened to meet my wife at a talk about spiritual life. I would recommend to go to the right places where you at least have a chance at meeting a Christian girl and then if it happens God will allow it. It requires a little work to attend an event but for some reason if you enter an event being sociable but not trying too hard women get drawn to you.
I can tell you that as a young man the main thing the kept me from hearing God was my desire for physical intimacy. It is understandable that that is your desire, and, no, God is not going to plop a woman down in front of you. You will meet many women. Those many women will be meeting many men. You have to try and catch one, plain and simple. Now you can do this through PUA trickery, or through being a nice guy. Being a nice guy should match you to a nice woman. PUA will trick any old hoe. Being a jerk will trick any old hoe. Theoretically. I know there are all kinds of red and black pill philosophy on all this, and I don't know what you look like or how tall you are. It may be over for you if you are too short. The time is ticking for you to get a very young wife. At 30+ you can still get a young wife. I'm 40+, so I'm screwed. But I have kids and am divorced, so, honestly, I don't really want to deal with that nonsense if I don't get something excellent dropped in my lap. Basically, you have a lot more you can work with. If you are older, like me, you CANNOT get divorced again. It's economic suicide. You might have to go to multiple churches. I know in my area there were a lot of lukewarm churches, and like zero marriageable women. They go to college and never come back. Good luck!
What you say is true mostly, but I am railing currently against the determinist mindset. You can have all manner of positives in the west but the reality is, there are too few quality women. Whether men are right or wrong about what they deem quality is beside the point. Phat is correct that the truth is that women meet many men, which in the west means too many options. They meet a lot of men in a lot of other countries too, but that renders them little since in many other countries the quality of men is super low. The only solution for a man seeking a woman reasonable in the historical sense, given he does well, is to be in a location where men are scarce, which also means quality men are scarce. It's just nature, nothing else. And doesn't guarantee you a great relationship either; after all, we are men and they are women. Period.
Don't forget that a lot of our guidance comes from the Bible and not tough times or how we feel. He that find a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor of the Lord means to find by searching, not by accident. I think 1 Corinthians 7 is very clear that if sexual sin is not an issue (it doesn't happen) then marriage isn't necessary.
Yes, I think because talking about sex openly (honestly and generally, not lewdly of course) is difficult in society, there isn't enough attention on your points. I also think that people drastically underestimate how far from ideal it is that careers, diminishment of matchmaking, or evaporating of family connections have led to many set ups for failure and the tough consequences. That is, beyond all the distractions, sex in society and media, etc "single too long," as you say, is almost never talked about. It's also funny that it's almost a foregone conclusion that one could just choose marriage - clearly the way that St. Paul writes that shows the time and culture differences, which are drastic. As if you can just say in this day and age, "Ok, tomorrow I'll marry, I finally see the light."
Back then, I think you actually could, it was pretty much a family transaction in many regards, of course with wisdom.Good point, today you can't just decide to turn it on and get married. It took decades and a decision to look overseas, and that ended up being easy and quick. Some people say to sublimate a sex drive into work (doesn't work), excerise (have you seen some of the girls?) service to others (still many unavailable or uninterested girls around). I couldn't go anywhere because the more I tried to "get it off my mind" the more I realized how alone I was and that other people were not alone. Go to a movie by myself? Forget it! Sheer misery.Yes, I think because talking about sex openly (honestly and generally, not lewdly of course) is difficult in society, there isn't enough attention on your points. I also think that people drastically underestimate how far from ideal it is that careers, diminishment of matchmaking, or evaporating of family connections have led to many set ups for failure and the tough consequences. That is, beyond all the distractions, sex in society and media, etc "single too long," as you say, is almost never talked about. It's also funny that it's almost a foregone conclusion that one could just choose marriage - clearly the way that St. Paul writes that shows the time and culture differences, which are drastic. As if you can just say in this day and age, "Ok, tomorrow I'll marry, I finally see the light."
If you are a person, and a man especially, who is physical and doesn't shun it in an ascetic way (like monks), it is a real challenge. You get constant "urges" that are just part of your biology. One could say in many ways this peculiar fact of existence (testosterone is literally what makes the world go 'round on every level) is the origin of this forum, and remains the troubling, nagging or uncomfortable challenge that won't go away - How do I rightly direct this energy?
The very short answer for the subject, which needs a book for proper explaining.
What's your main change or directive?